Why are so many men looking for women with no romantic past/low body count?

Why are so many men looking for women with no romantic past/low body count?
Do you guys really think women with a high body count are sluts or are they just not relationship material?

I've seen a lot of guys here on GaG saying they want a woman with no romantic past so that's why I'm asking this. Im tired of seeing questions about it and wanna know the reason for why guys want this so badly?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I'll see if I can break this down as much as possible in a way you can understand:

    Men, I think, are bothered by female unfaithfulness more than vice versa on a psychosexual level. So they fear that getting involved with a woman who has had more than one relationship or sexual partner means she lacks restraint, sexual morals, or could easily cheat and swing over to the next guy. Which is not entirely untrue, but there are many men who are also the same.

    On a deep level, that I've discussed on GaG more than once, sex alters women in ways that is not the same as it does to men. When women are able to have multiple relationships or multiple sex partners, it creates more of what I call a 'knowledge of evil' for them, in which they will begin to see that they can have a man or sex at any time they want, and ultimately never has to be committed or connected to one man long term. Subconsciously they don't see it but are thinking: I had this or that in the past and I can have it again with the next guy.

    Having said all this, a woman who has had more than one concrete relationship and had sex in all those relationships doesn't bother me. But a woman who has multiple hookups and flings with different men, does bother me. So unlike most men, I don't need a woman to be a naive virgin or have only had one or two relationships/sex partners in order for me to feel comfortable being with her, because I recognize that most women are going to have some kind of romantic or sexual experience and it's almost impossible to find a virgin woman in the United States, but at the same time I agree with men in the sense that I also don't want a woman with a knowledge of evil from all of her sexual encounters or tumultuous relationship history.

    • I definitely don't believe in the knowledge of evil thing. That sounds like some bs and just another excuse to judge someone by their body count...

    • @apple1996 Try to think of it like this: When a woman becomes sexually active, and she's able to do that not just with one man but many, and she can see that she can do this a lot, she can develop a kind of forbidden fruit knowledge - so to speak - of how to manipulate or even deceive men. She develops a predictive knowledge of knowing what each man is going to do in whatever sexual situation she is in or what might possibly come about, and how to either take advantage of it, or even screw one of them over. That is basically what I mean. Men with sexual experience or body counts can be the same way, but a lot of men are not because they're struggling with the confidence to even make something happen with a woman, whereas women are just standing by knowing a man is going to try to want to have sex with her at some point. So with that, she uses a knowledge of evil to try to manipulate him or the situation for either her benefit or his inability to have sex with her. Make sense?

    • I haven't met to many women that actually want to manipulate men. Like very few are that evil. Most are just trying to find a man that makes them happy and fail at finding that so body count adds up.

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  • It's something I didn't realize I enjoyed until I had it. If all of your relationships have baggage and benchmarks in the form of exes, it's a new and strange experience to be with someone who is a blank slate. At first it was a little tedious and a heavy responsibility to be with someone who had no experience before me. Not having things come up which were pretty typical in dating before though, like a girl going back to, or cheating with an ex is pretty nice.

    There's a mindset difference as well, she got with me and was serious about making the relationship work out, meeting in the middle, rather than taking off if it became inconvenient. It's a mindset not just women, but men have when you're used to being able to simply hook up with someone else. Anyway, that's just my experience, though I have no expectation to repeat that experience at my age.

    Any woman I get with now would be, well, a woman, while my wife and I may be in a poly relationship, it would be odd as all hell to try and fish for someone young who doesn't have any experience, and also I would have nothing in common with due to an age gap of over a decade and a half.

    I get why other guys would like the idea if they've experienced it before. Finding women to sleep with is not difficult, finding someone to settle down with is an uphill battle. On the flip side of that though, if they had a "pure" girl before, and that's what they desire, why didn't they hold on to her?

Most Helpful Girls

  • I think it’s a overwhelming fear that this woman he loves and wants to marry, MAY have at one time in her past been with a man who was bigger than him in the penis department… WAY bigger, and he could bring her to wave after wave of multiple orgasms. Yet the entire time he's been with her, she only had a orgasm during sex if she masturbates during sex, or by oral sex… But, Alejandro, the well hung Latin lover, she had before him could practically snap his fingers and make her cum. And DESPITE the fact that she CHOSE YOU… you (sorry HE) is so insecure, he simply cannot stand the thought that SHE might just be longing for the days when Alejandro would cascade her into an orgasmic pleasure-pool lasting literally all night, not the disappointing 15mins of unachieved orgasms he manages! So… Yeah, insecurity! And women who have had sex with 4 or 5 men during her life, are DEFINITELY not sluts, especially when guys who have had sex with 5, 10, 20 or more women are considered “studs”!
    “Remember, if the only way you can feel better about your self, is to make a woman feel bad… YOU are the bitch!” Rudolph Valentino, The 20th centuries greatest lover!

  • Some men want their "perfect" woman and believe they don't have to be put to the same standard. Those men are the ones who are the loudest lol.

    • Men and women can have unrealistic standards for what they want, and/or an image of what they bring to the table that's disconnected from reality. I figure if a person can at minimum hold a conversation, listening and talking, we can get along. If they can only talk and not listen, or expect you to dance monkey dance, it won't go well. How was your dating experience in broad strokes? If it continued to trend as it was when I was doing heavily, I can't imagine how much it wears down on you.

    • I'm sorry but I don't understand the question you're asking me right now, can you please clarify in simpler words?

    • You're young and are in the dating scene, is it a tedious and difficult experience trying to find a partner, or not so much? Asking from a difference in time, and gender. It was a meatgrinder for me, and got worse as I got older.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • I asked a guy once, if I get Amnesia and start life over again, would that count as no past or body count, cause I don't remember any of it?

    Another one, once said... he just couldn't get it out of his head that he was (Insert whatever number) and that is all he could think of, nothing else mattered. That it obviously isn't as special to me as it is to him, cause having that many means there is nothing special to me about it.

    • The Amnesia question is interesting... It raises yet another question: do you have casual sex because you know how pleasurable it is OR is it the biological signal which tells you "fuck this guy"? It would be a good "experiment" to see...

    • The bit about sex being special or not: My views are colored by having been in a horrible relationship with someone who had a low body count. The sex did not feel special at all in that situation. There are risks associated with promiscuity (the stats are clear), but on the other hand every person is unique. After disentangling myself from a toxic relationship, finding someone compatible with me with a good heart was way more important than the body count. Our society is not stable and a lot of people, regardless of body count, are affected by that, so I think it is important to look at a woman for who she is in the present. My experience is that sex is special when it is coupled with love, connection, and genuine intimacy.

    • @IMuser In my case it wasn't pleasurable, it was about trying to regain control over my body after being attacked and trying to hurt men in general.

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  • A low body count usually means one
    -takes care of themselves.
    -not an every Tom, Dick, and Harry.
    -Intimacy is sacred and less likely to cheat.
    -sticks too…finishes.., commits
    —NO MAN WANTS TO DRUDGE THROUGH A SEWER LINE FULL OF SOMEONE ELSES 💩.
    —Keep believing Hollywood, media, and porn.

  • I dont feel guys are the only ones. I want someone who’s slept with less than a handful but not because he didn't have the opportunity to. I want someone who had the opportunity but chose not to because he sees his body as something more than a fcktoy and he sees a need for emotional attachment before physical stimulation. I want him to define self respect similar to how i do. I want someone who chooses wisely who they give their body to and I want them to have been romantically interested in the person they gave their body to at the time (unless otherwise pressured/raped). I want someone whos not playing a numbers game. I want someone who at least tried to fight temptation and didn't just give themselves away so easily because they felt temporarily horny. But it seems like a lot of people dont care to fight because they never intended to turn the sex into a relationship then into marriage (or another kind of hopefully “forever”)

    • I like your outlook. For a long time I was a total slut and know how it affected my mindset. Really it wasn't until having kids that I settled down. Even while working on problems, it was always in the back of my head, "well, if this shit goes sideways, it isn't like there aren't other women". Like subconsciously you prepare escape routes even when things are going well. Anyway, I don't look down on men or women with that preference, only question the probability of obtaining such a relationship depending on their lifestyle, age, and how they approach dating. Like at my age if I were seriously looking for another relationship with that as a criteria, the odds are the same as randomly shooting a bullet from a handgun and hitting a target 2 miles away. Do you think most people who have that criteria have a high level of self-awareness of themselves?

    • @razelove i think they do it because they want to. But it still feels like more of an act of impulse rather than thinking things through first. I want someone who thinks of the consequences before acting

  • It makes no sense to me. I prefer women who relish life, have experienced infatuation, love, passion, ecstasy, and given themselves completely to their relationships. So what if a relationship doesn't work out. You just get up and try, try again.

    The idea of putting their lives on hold until they are married seems like pie in the sky. It's a Disney fantasy. In the meantime, they let life pass them by.

    Also, it can't be denied that women are sexual beings. I think they SHOULD be comfortable in their own bodies. I like women with strong libidos who adore masculinity and love sex.

    Purity means nothing to me. The idea that a woman who has engaged in sex is "used goods" is a joke.

    I don't care about a woman's body count. I expect her to have had a life before we met. I assess her personality and values myself. I don't need a resume or background check. I've never asked a woman's "body count" and none have ever asked mine. To me, that's low class and immature.

    • Yes for sure they are missing out on life experience

    • It depends which way you look at it. I know a woman that messed around with all kinds of men when she was young. She says it was one of the worst things she ever did and tries to warn young women not to do the same. None of them pay any attention.

    • @Truthatanycost I'm the opposite I've only been with one person but I don't think that's necessarily the best thing for everyone. I just got lucky that I gave my virginity to the right person. Most people need some experience to find the right person.

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  • Ah the old double standard. When men sleep around we are cheered for it. But the moment a woman does the same she's a slut. A lot guys tend to not want to admit they hold such a double standard despite the replies to this question will show that many do.

    • I hate that so many men sleep around then judge women for it

    • It's true. I personally don't care for promiscuous men.

  • That was never on my list of desirable traits. I don't particularly understand it either unless it's a symptom of really bad performance anxiety.

    • True prob have some bad anxiety

  • I would think it's because they fear promiscuity during the relationship above all else

    • One of many reasons.

    • What are some other ones?

    • Why buy and commit to milk from one cow who is old and the milk is getting chunky but gave all the fresh milk away for free to everyone in town when you can get tons of milk from lots of cows in their prime? Its pretty embarrassing and stupid do do that. So why do i want to publicly humiliate myself? Paying top dollar for a cow everyone had free? No thanks.

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  • Because they’re delusional.
    No such thing.
    Women are just as sexual as they are, if not even more, but it’s demonized to say so. If you want a virgin right now …your gonna have to find a “fatso” that no man wanted because she’s a whale. Because I was a whale up until 21 and complete virgin cause none of those dogs wanted me. JUST SPEAKING FACTS. At 22 I slept with 15 BRAD PITTS cause I lost weight and became hot.

    • And you think being a hoe is an achievement to be proud of?

    • @grega239 Nobody should be proud of anything ever. Go find your imaginary virgin CHAD.

    • I don't know. You said that you got fucked by 15 brad pitt types. Kinda sounds like you're proud. didn't say i want a virgin, just not the town ho

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  • If you pay attention most those ask dick questions I think they think if they can girl that doesn't no what's going on or have had dick yet then they can be the stud they want to pretend to be... it makes no since . be ause they still dont know how to please a girl because they still are making it all about them instead of the girlie also tell them
    If a girl can get herself off with the very tip of her finger and how come you can't do with your dick you know why that happens because she takes the time to learn how to do it I think the whole thing's kind of funny

  • I wouldn’t take men’s opinions on GAG as the general opinion of men, there’s mostly a specific type of man on here (the type who tends to believe this high value stuff, and basically think women should obey them). Overall, it seems like they don’t want women to have previous relationships because it will make them feel insecure

    • I will agree that most men on GaG tend to have more of a MGTOW and Red Pill thought process, but there are still plenty of us with more balanced views.

    • For most men it has nothing to do w insecure. I got a big ass dick what am i supposed to be insecure about? Just not going to buy something free, im too smart to be a fucking moron.

    • All of the guys I know don't care... but practically all of them are only looking to date to get sex...

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  • I don't get it at all. I am the last guy to think I can judge that... ahem

  • Yea girls with high body count are sluts, there is biological reason to prefer a virgin.

    https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MamasBabyPapasMaybe

  • For me, it’s two main reasons


    1. Not wanting to feel objectified or another body/number. If a woman has been with many men, it’s natural to feel like you’re another number, body, etc. It’s not so much an insecurity thing, rather, feeling as if her head, thoughts, and feelings aren’t with you in the moment as she may be thinking about all the other men she’s been with. It doesn’t feel as special or unique anymore and I suppose that is literally true because she’s been with so many men so her mind will process subsequent relationships as not being as meaningful or special. If you look up “pair bonding brain after being with many sexual partners” you’ll find pieces that I’m alluding to.


    2. Past behavior is a good predictor or indicator of future behavior. It’s not 100% predictive, but it is what everyone judges on. If you look at hiring companies, agencies, etc. They’ll see your past work history, behavioral issues, and more. All of this is an indicator of how reliable you are as an employee.
    A woman who has been with many men can say that it does nothing to her loyalty, love for you, etc. Personally, I can’t trust that. To me, it’s too much risk, too much complexity, and too much stress to think about her loyalty to me constantly or if she really means what she’s saying to me like she hasn’t said this before to every other man.




    In short, many men will agree that these types
    of women are good to only have sex with. If you want a serious relationship, girlfriend, or wife then do not choose these women or avoid them when wanting to become serious.

  • They are mortally afraid that some other man might get the better of them.

  • I'll keep this as simple as possible so that it's easy to understand

    Men and women are different. We are looking for and care about different things, that the other side does not necessarily care about in the same way

    Like girls care about a guy and his ability to provide some level of stability in the present or the future, guys do not care about a woman's ability to provide stability ever. We just do not care, nor do we judge you for caring

    Girls care about their man being strong and being able to protect them. Guys do not care about their woman being strong or their ability to protect them ever lol. Nord you guys judge women for wanting that

    The problem is. When it comes to things that men care about. A lot of woman such as yourself do judge it. Because it doesn't necessarily benefit you

    And at the end of the day that's your problem. Get over it

    If men judged you for what you were looking for in a man as a woman you would have a problem with it and kind of just look at him like he's stupid. Because these things matter from your perspective. That's how guys look at you when you're talking about this subject

    And I guarantee if you had a brother or a guy you care about you'd want him to choose a girl that you see as not a hoe. You wouldn't want him to choose a single mom. You'd want him to find a girl with no kids and start his own family because that's better for him. Not necessarily better for the girl

    But you're looking at this from the perspective of what's good for you as a woman when we were talking about what men care about. And that's your problem. Get over it

    Now I'm not intending to be rude here, but it's actually necessary for you to get it. This isn't about you. Get over yourself

  • They are terrified the woman will have something to compare them against, and just they just aren't going to measure up 😂

  • Apple, the reason why men want this stems from what they probably hear in red pill and MGTOW communities that have become riddled with toxic masculinity and misogynistic individuals.

    Essentially, women that sleep around a lot are more loose and unable to stick to one man because they lose their ability to pair bond and form meaningful and strong relationships with a man who should be truly worthy of such a woman. They lose their value with more men they sleep with because of their value lies within their age and fertility years being prime for child bearing ie their twenties. Which is why you see the whole "women 30 and older hit the wall." Because they road the "cock carousel" during their youth. This brings the whole "she's not yours, it's just your turn," "she's for the streets," "pump and dump" comes into play.

    The gist is they become corrupted and unworthy of relationships because they chose to give it up for many men I hated of selecting and staying with one or being perceptive with her choices. Bringing baggage and emotional imbalances to the relationship.

    Women that hold on to their virginity protect their worth and value in the eyes of these men because it shows restraint and good decision making that doesn't lead down the path of promiscuity, single motherhood, village whore/slut, etc.

    It really depends on the man and individual. Their standards, their insecurities amd how they want to deal with it should they be presented with it. Men want to have a faithful, loyal, and loving wife. Not one they have to fear has slept with many men and just being another tally on her list. Otherwise what would make them so special compared to the others.

    That's what it seems to boil down to.

    • Lies, lies. A 35-40 years old male still choose 20-25 years old virgin over the older one.

    • Also loosing virginity doesn't automatically meant u are sleeping around

  • Let me explain the four big reasons why it matters to a man when dealing with a woman. Buckle up, this is gonna take a while.

    1) Men and Women are both biologically hardwired to be attracted and disgusted by certain things. It just so happens that one of the things we guys are instinctively disgusted by are promiscuous women as our girlfriend and/or wife. That's just our nature, just like how it's in a woman's nature to look for a man who can provide and protect. Now when it comes to just sex, they won't care, but a committed relationship is a whole different ballpark.

    2) Stats show that the higher a woman's body count, the more likely she will initiate breakups ans divorces. AND it's more likely she will have mental problems down the long run. You lose your ability to pair bond with every new sexual partner you have, and that's what helps relationships work through tough times... or in general.

    3) When you (a woman) are in a relationship with a man, you are becoming a representation of that man, whether you know it or not. That means that what you say or do is gonna affect him to. So therefore, if you're a hoe, or you say or do some crazy and stupid stuff, not only are you putting yourself in a bad light, but you're putting your boyfriend/husband in a bad light. Because everyone is gonna be like, "This crazy girl is his?" or "This hoe is who he is taking seriously?" That is embarrassing for any man, even if he won't admit it to others or himself.

    4) THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT REASON. There is a reason why since the dawn of time, men have demanded that the woman they take seriously are virgins. Not all guys nowadays want virgins now, but still want lower body counts from the woman they take seriously. And the reason why is because they want to ensure paternity. I assume I would be correct if I were to say that a deep dark fear for a lot of women is being r@ped in a dark alley by some creep. That deep feeling of fear that you get, the male equivalent to that is when he busts his ass, investing his blood, sweat, and tears into raising a child, and then finding out one day that the kid was never his. That's why guys have an issue with taking promiscuous women seriously. Because if you take a promiscuous woman seriously, and she gets pregnant, there's a good chance that child may not be yours.

    • Pair bonding isn't real lol and yeah I get the digust thing cuz I'm disgusted to even be with someone that's kissed someone else just due to ocd reasons but I can't see why that'd be a issue for normal people. Also the dark alley thing is not comparable to raising a child that isn't yours. Totally different things there. We are all hard wired to raise/love kids that aren't are own in a village sense but our society has unfortunately killed that

    • Pair bonding pertains to you being willing to work things out with someone. And studies, as I mentioned before, show that women tend to lose that ability with the more sexual partners they have. And about the comparison to the r@pe and paternity fraud was to explain the reaction men have. Men and women aren't the same, so the things that may affect a man may not have the same effect on women and vice versa. That was to show that, even though they are two different things, it results in the same feeling. The difference is, one event causes that feeling for women and a different event causes that feeling for men. Different events, same feeling.

    • I'm pretty sure if I asked any man which would make him feel worse rape or not being the baby daddy. All of them would answer rape 🙄 But sure your entitled to having your opinion. If you feel that way okay but I think majority don't feel that way

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  • Iunno, my guess is to satisfy urges and have someone they don't need to wear protection with for fear of STDs. I've told previous partners that I really don't care about how many times they've boned or with whom they boned. They asked me if I wanted to know, I said 'I don't care, it's not my business.' All I want is honesty when it comes to health.

  • Insecurity. They are afraid of being compared unfavorably to a past lover. That's quite stupid. If a woman has no experience with men and picks me, as she married she may regret her choice. A woman that has known a lot of men and then picks me is choosing me over the rest. She knows what she is getting and is happy with it.

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