Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health +1 y
Guys and their penis complexes...Why can't they get over it?
Anonymous
I've seen the same question posted countless times, all of them wondering the same thing. Am I big enough? Am I too small? etc... I always answer with something along the lines of- I really don't care about the size, I care about the guy attached to it. I'm a virgin but I know what sex is and how it works. But yet I always get voted down for such answers. And I'm being totally truthful that I really don't give a f*** about size. Having a small d*** isn't going to be a deal-breaker because by the time I have sex I'll have already liked the dude A LOT. I know a lot of other girls feel this way too. Why can't guys stop being insecure? I'm not being rude. It's just really not a big deal at all.
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What Girls & Guys Said
14 52For the same reason why girls are always worried if they are fat (for example). Besides, penis somehow represents man's power, so on a mental level it's like "bigger penis = more power".
This complex varies from person to person. Some guys are fine with their size even if it's below average. Some guys have complexes even if it's much bigger than average. Some guys simply don't think about it at all since they don't really care.
i have a big d***, so I don't care.
It pretty much has nothing to do with sex. It is about peoples self worth.
If someone is self conscious about part of their body, then they will notice anything negative about it. And there is plenty of negative out there in the media.
So it's not surprising that places like this are full of threads looking for reassurance.
Unfortunately, until they accept themselves for how they are, it will always be an issue for them.
From personal experience, I find that even when I do feel good about myself, It still only takes reading/hearing something negative to put me back in that negative spiral.
A p***s is a p***s ;)
I think women don't need to have a certain size, but many women prefer something substantial. Why do guys care so much? It's something guys can't change. It's not in their control. When something is not in your control, that doesn't feel good. Personality - you can change it. Weight - you can work out and get fit. Face? If you need it, you can get plastic surgery. Or girls can use makeup to make themselves look good. Breasts - you can get a surgery for it. And even if the breast surgery is not successful, it's not a sexual organ like a penis. There are surgeries to make penis bigger but procedures have no guarantees yet. And if the penile surgery goes wrong, oh boy, that could ruin a man's life. I think the world will be a better place if men can make their penis bigger by doing certain exercises or something.
As a side note, I'd like to blame mothers a little bit. I know very little about this, but penis size is might be mostly determined when a baby is in the mother's womb. Father's DNA has a role in it too of course. Maybe the baby has to be exposed to a high level of testosterone in the mother's womb to have a big penis. Maybe mothers have to act more like a man during their pregnancy. So ladies, please do whatever you can to make your future baby son's penis substantial.
i know I have this inecure train of thought. but that's because all the girls I knew in high school and arund where I lived would say size matters, but even tho I have this insecure thought I have been able to show a few girls that even tho I'm not big or small I can make you feel great in bed. lie someone said its all in how you us it I know that but still I'm insecure nuthing will change that
I hate to be cliche but "it's not the size it's how you us it" a small one can be used like a torpedo against a giant military battle ship
Guys who don't have sex the first time or what not are usaully guys who are under 7 inches... they are too insecure to whip it out on the first date anyways.
Probably because of all the stuff we see on public media... such as nicki minaj and rianna saying stuff like "How big are you" "Can you handle this, are you big enough"... it doesn't help anyone.
You're a vigin. You have no idea what you're talking about.
Because we know chicks like the big d***. I know they love mine and I know that there are many boyfriends out there that hate the fact that a player like me can come scoop up there chick and deliver way more in the bedroom than they can. Those guys are such losers and pathetic. To them I say marry a virgin because that's the only way you'll ever be her "FAVORITE".
TRUTH HURTS
"a player like me" she may be married as a virgin but it sounds like you'll always be alone
I am alone but I am never lonely.
I think men all have the fear that they might meet some awesomely beautiful girl, or the girl who they love dearly, but don't know how she feels, and that they might make it to the bedroom one day, and when she takes his pants off she just laughs and walks away laughing. I know that is my fear and one reason why I'm still a virgin.
speak for yourself
I can't answer for other guys, as I've decided that I'm not worried about my size, though I'm a virgin, too. If I had to guess, though, it's probably the same reason that some women obsess over their boobs: poor self-esteem or mis-information. They assume they're going to be judged by them, or they've been exposed to p*rn and think that they're not big enough. It's ridiculous, but that's what our over-sexed media has brain-washed so many people into thinking. It takes time for guys or girls to get past this mindset, sometimes, and some never do...they're convinced that they don't measure up. Look at Hollywood: everyone is so worried that they aren't good enough that they're constantly getting themselves augmented, until they're no longer recognizable. It's really sad, but that's how it is. :(
(younger) guys are insecure about one thing, their penis size. It's stupid and childish, you are correct.
Now, pass this message to women:
Stop worrying about your ENTIRE body because all your insecurities about every single part of your body is as stupid and childish as men worrying about their penis ! We love your body in many shape and sizes, so relax ! :)
Because there are guys who aren't confident or secure enough about their personality. So, what they lack in the charm department they compensate it in the d*** department :D
sa230e nailed it.
i know my size is completely average. I know that neither the length or the width is not "disappointing" and also it's "nothing special" either.
now compare this with people's noses. it's understandable if someone has a complex when their nose is "too big" (compared to everyone else) or have a strange shape or whatever...but how often do you see people worry about their nose when it's NORMAL shaped and NORMAL sized? hardly.
now why can't I accept my NORMAL shaped, NORMAL sized d***? I don't know, but sa230e explained this in his answer.
it's weird and it is a completely psychological (unconscious) thing.
i like the way you think... don't let it change
I don't know lol. I'm the exact average according to most studies and I can live with that. Most of the people freaking out about their size are usually average and plenty enough for 90% of women out there.
I have to say I'm really tired of women asking the labia and breast questions also though.
Yeah, the repititive quesitons have to go.
Yeah that's true, but sometimes if the d*** is too big, not all of it will fit in. I prefer an average size. Men just want a big d*** to brag to other guys. While the truth is the men with average d***s can fit ALL of it in the vagina and get more pleasure
I didn't think it was a big deal as a virgin. Now that I'm having sex, my boyfriend is small and I think it's great, but I think I'd like to try it with someone bigger since he can't get that deep.
How small is he?