Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health +1 y
He makes me wait?
Anonymous
Who has ever meet a guy who has made the girl wait for sex? Unusual huh? Like the roles have been reversed or something. Well that's exactly my case with a guy I been dating now for about 3 weeks. He shows interest in every way but sexually. Yes we made out a few times but he would move away nervously and I would initiate the kisses and when we do kiss, he doesn't firmly pull me in with his hands. We have been alone at my place 3 times and not one time did he even try anything. No I'm not ready to have sex wit him but I'm just used to guys trying something intimate to show they are attracted but he does nothing. He can just spend time with me without even trying to do anything sexual. So I asked him if I was a friend to him and he said no and that he is a lil slow paced with because he really respects me too much to do that yet and wants to really get to know me first and that he doesn't think about trying to get laid when he is with a girl especially me because he really likes me. That's all great and everything and that is what us girls want a guy who isn't trying to do us all the time but he is a lil too reserved for me. I just wish he would take charge with the kisses sometimes and like I said I'm just not used to a guy like this who can be with an attractive female and not try or act like he wants to touch her as it being a natural thing between a man and woman. He has expressed to me twice that he is attracted to me and that he hasn't liked a girl so much in a long time and wants to take time with me. I like him a lot and I'm willing to wait but its hard, cause when I try to come on to him, I feel turned down cause he doesn't do anything at all. But this man is spending time with me and took me to a surprised MAVS game so he is expressing in other ways that he is digging me but sometimes I wonder about his sexuality but also he already told me why. He just wants to wait. I just hope when it is time for sex, that he doesn't suck or expect me to make all the moves cause I feel that way now. What do you think about him? Oh, and he is not a virgin. he has a child
Updates:
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Thanks guys! Now its going on 5 weeks and nothing yet from him. I mean we hold hands, go out and he is always coming to my place spending a night and nothing. Even when I put my butt on him in bed, I feel nothing rising like normal. funny
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It doesn't matter now, y'all. Surprisingly, he dump me for his ex that he broke up with 4 years ago. They have 1 child together, 3 years old. Never saw it coming and he called me last week and told me on the phone...
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that she wanted to work it out and he said he was open to the idea and that he is sincerely sorry. My heart was broken for the first time ever when I heard that. .
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Guess what? For the first time ever in my life, "someone" sent me flowers(Tulips) 2 days ago and my first thought that it was him but I just don't know.
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I've dated a lot of guys before him and I did mention that I wish a guy would send me flowers someday and how I have always wanted that. I intended that for him to read and actually do and then a week later I get some Tulips delivered? Unsure though.
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on my status update on MySpace I mentioned that. I hope its him cause I really liked him. who ever it is is keeping me wondering and I hate it. Call him? but I'm not sure if it is him or not. Its been 3 days now and still no call or nothing to know
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who sent them. this is not a secret admire because this person gave my apartment recruiter my cell to let me know that I had a package waiting. So its a guy I dated but not too sure if it is this guy. I haven't heard from him in a week...
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Well, its been almost a month now and he really is gone. I guess he worked it out with her which is good but at the same time I wish all this never happen. I really was patient with this man and all was smooth with him and then she had to come back. :(
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What Girls & Guys Said
16 26Maybe he's bisexual and likes guys and girls, when a guy does not make a move on a girl then somethings wrong or maybe he has an infection on his penis or something?
ROFLMAO...an infection, really? Not sure why that was so funny, but I had to comment.
He just isn't a man whore.
It happened that I made out with a girl but didn't want to have sex with her, even if she showed she was willing.
(more than once)
You said that you intend to reject any sexual advance from him because "you're not ready yet". Not all guys are dumb. We can sense these things. I've dated women for months before having sex. In fact I didn't make a sexual advance on the last woman that I was in long term relationship with for over four months. One night we were drinking some wine in bed and started making out. She got a dreamy look in her eye and asked me if she could sit on my face. That was a very clear signal that she was ready for sex and would not reject me. We were together for the next 4 years and still had sex after she moved out. We are still good friends.
No one time we were alone and I put his hand on my lap and would have to guide it and he would do nothing but try to go to sleep. like that right there is a sign from a girl that she wants you but he didn't even budge at all.
If you gave him that clear of a signal then there must be some other reason. No way around it... you have to ask him why he's not getting the message.
He said he respects me too much to go there yet but I felt really rejected
Well, you're living what guys are living very often with girls. It's no fun, I know all about it.
I'm sorry to hear that. Best wishes!
Is he religious? Maybe he doesn't believe in sex before marriage!
in my opinion he sounds like a real genuinely nice guy which is very rare... don't take that for granted
Better change the person
lovey I'm wiyh a guy who gives love to me when he feels fit I no how you feel you don't want your expectations with him going crashing down .alls I say to you is take you time have fun don't rush into anthing.
wow. you are such a slut...3 whole weeks. can I have your number.?
Dude, that sh*t is funny!!!!!!!! but you have to wait your turn as I asked first!..
No. the first night would make me one and I never said I was going to sleep with him. just surprised he never tried like most guys would early on. he is a real good guy.
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guys suck
As long as they suck where you like them to suck it's OK XD
Lmao, that's true.
I know for one of my guys friends, sex really ruined his last relationship. And it pretty much paralyzed him. So he wants to take things really slow with his new relationship. Maybe having a kid made your guy extra cautious. Five weeks is still kinda early for sex anyway.
Yeah I know but its better than the first date, second date or 3rd. Its just unusual for a guy not to do anything at all when he is clearly into the girl in all other ways. I feel like I initiate the kisses and grabbing his hand. idk
What about sex do you think ruined it, or idk. how ddi it manifest,? Cause my 'person' is pretty tentative to have sex, & he really likes me. I am not ready but I have not said anything about it, tho as someone stated earlier - it is probably evident to amore trained eye.
Maybe he's scared of having another kid and is trying to restrain himself?
He's a great guy, and if you want a great relationship with someone who actually respects you and cares about you for more than your body then you must wait. Come on now, 3 weeks isn't that much, I'm sure you could keep it in your pants for longer than that! It would really be a shame if you waste such a good man.
Yeah one of the biggest mistakes many guys have when they like a girl is that they don't want to close, for some reason they want to treat this girl different because she is special. But what a dumb idea, what had been working for them in the past is not being use and they are doing the total oposite now without knowing they are only screwing themselves up.
What does it mean," they do not want to close"? I am dealing with a similar situation.. The guy says he really likes me,& it is fairly obvious, but whenever we kiss he gets kind of worried about it& once he would not even kiss me & he does not thin w should have sex.. he's had lots- I know... & it's not that he is not attracted to me, he was attracted to me before I even knew he was alive..& He & his little 'friend' told/tell me so. :-) So, I am curious. I have other options.. But I like HIM
Lol sorry for my language, it is a name mostly used in sales, but is also used in pickup theory. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5YrFE6OyN8 Not closing is a normal behaviour for guys that are new in the dating scence or that like you so much that they make the mistake of treating you differently, which means he is still a good prospect.
If he is too afraid to get close or 'to close' ,then how can it ever g anywhere? What would make him decide to 'close'.. BTW. Does 'to close' mean any physical intimacy, or straight SEX?
Lol yes it means sex. Guys learn to close with time, after screwing many times and finding out that treating a girls differently just because they think she is special does nbot bring them anywhere, so they learn the importance of closing. In your situation he probably thinks you are special, so because he doesn't have this previous experiences, even if you tell him you want it, he may still not do it, so this is a hard situation.
He probably doesn't want to hurt you, or start anything quite yet. I am seeing a guy like this, and I have to initiate everything, but this is because he's had past trauma and just doesn't like sex as much as he should. So maybe like my guy, he has some past issues that keep him from doing anything.
You shouldn't be worried over this at all, be happy he hasn't jumped your bones and ditched you. Tell him you'd like him to be a bit more sexual, while still taking it slow.
Why do you say he is worreid about hurting her, & give an example of him being hurt?
I can't explain, some people just feel that way. Maybe he doesn't want a relationship just yet and if he has sex with her he'll feel like he's using her.
It all doesn't even matter now guys. he dumped me for his ex cause they have shildren together but its good to know the signs. thx
my current boyfriend wanted to wait at least 2/3 months.
we've been together for 4 years. I'm glad we got to know each other first and bond.
So you all actually waited that long? Wow. I would love that too but it is hard. However I'm willing to wait for this guy. I feel it will be an amazing relationship with so much built up anxiety