Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health +1 y
Guys, how to help my boyfriend overcome sexual problems?
Anonymous
we have been dating for almost three months and I consider myself to be a very sexually active person. I want sex almost everyday. I am 20 and my boyfriend is 19. we get along so well, and everything is perfect between us, he is perfect with everything! but he never initiates sex. never. I always try to bring up the topic and he keeps avoiding it. we never had intercourse before but I gave him oral only twice and he came in one minute, he also did not have much sperm, I was surprised that that was it. he told me before that his ex girlfriend was abusive and humiliated him sexually, and he had erectile dysfunction for a while after he broke up with her. I don't know what other problems he might have, like low testosterone levels maybe? I feel like he really hates opening this topic, he tells me he loves all the time and praises my personality and tells me I am his all and that I help with a lot of emotional issues but this lack of a sexual spark between us is killing me. our love is so platonic and I don't want it to be that way. I believe I love him but this thing is killing me. I hate having to separate my sexual desires from my love life. I am willing to help him overcome his sexual problems but I don't know how to approach this issue. if you were him, how would you have liked me to handle this?
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What Guys Said
(17)I would want to take it slow. Even if you crave for sex every day, he has been mentally and emotionally scarred by his ex. Instead of sex, why not try to just take a step back, and work on it a little at a time? Cuddle with him. Be sweet and caring. Slowly help him open up, and help him through that tough life issue. You might hate it, but you might have to separate your sex and love life for the time being, until you can get him back up again if you know what I mean. It might take a while, but once he fully trusts you, I'm sure he can't wait to satisfy you. ... by the way, the amount of semen that comes out depends on a few factors. Could just be the person, could be how horny they are, could be what they ate in the last few days, etc.. Things of that nature.
Try Viagara
It IS going to be difficult to work through something like this, because part of it is physical (that he only reaches a weak orgasm and cums quickly), but the emotional part is probably very connected to that (he might be worried that any sexual experience will be a repeat of the negative ones he had, and even though his relationship with you is very different, fears are irrational by nature.)
Do you guys do a lot of foreplay/making out? If he's okay with that, you might use that as a starting point and then go further as he becomes turned on. With the physical aspect, many guys do come quickly because they became really good at masturbating to a fast orgasm, but if you stroke him/give him a different sensation with your hands, he can build up the ability to last longer.
Hope I can be of help :)
He probably has performance anxiety. He thinks he'll cum too quick and you won't enjoy it. I had the same problem but for him to get over it you have to be patient with him. Make him comfortable having sex with you. Because it's hard not to come early. Especially if that's what's going through your mind before you even start
can you please share your experience with that. like what caused it? and how you were able to overcome it?
Its really up to him its not your fault. There are so many factors that effect a mans erection.
His life style
Porn
Masterbation
Trauma
Stress
Etc.
The only thing you can do is feed him food that may increase his testosterone like
Peanuts
Walnuts
Flac seeds
Watermelon
Bananas
Avocados
Avocados