Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health +1 y
My boyfriend told me I need to look more like a porn star?
Anonymous
We were flipping through the channels when we were bored and Sasha Grey was on the Tyra Banks show. So my boyfriend turns to me and tell me "she's actually my favorite." OK. So not a big deal - I've seen her films as well... But now he's been making more and more comments about how she does her makeup, and how her ass looks, and how long her hair is, etc. We were both in the middle of making out and we started fooling around and he stopped me and asked me to go do my makeup like hers. WTH. He's asked me to wear my hair extensions to bed before. He's told me a need to go to the gym to work on my ass. I actually have a nice ass. I weight 115 and I don't really know what the hell else I need to do to have her "perfect ass." I'm on my university's track team so I'm in shape. I'm actually heartbroken. I am not her. I never will be her. I will never be LIKE her. That's just not who I am or what I look like. I though pron was supposed to be separate from a guy's girlfriend? What do I do?
Updates:
+1 y
Thanks everyone who responded with a serious answer. I really appreciate it. I just needed some reassurance that this was not normal, or w/e. How do I talk to him about this? How do I bring it up? How should I phrase things? Etc. Again- thanks!
+1 y
Thanks everyone - girls and guys! I know we're all pretty much strangers here, but I feel a little better. So thanks. I'm going to talk to him next week and just lay out what an asshole he's been and go from there.
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What Girls & Guys Said
32 27yea I would tell him 2 shut da f*** up bout her and if he don't stop den leave him alone and tell him 2 go find a girl that can b like her. You should b yourself and feel comfortable around da man you wit, and he makin you feel like you gotta b sum1 ur not, and go 2 da gym, and all dis otha sh*t...f*** dat! You don't need him, you can find sum1 that will want you 4 you and b happy with who you are and wut you look like. I'm 110 pounds so I'm always thinkin I'm 2 skiny and sh*t but at da end of da day I'm like "f*** it" if a nigga don't want me 4 me den oh maf***in well! his loss because I got my sh*t on lock and don't let no nigga tell me otha wise...u gotta put yo foot down on these niggas sumtimes, let dem no who run sh*t
From a guys standpoint, your boyfriend is juvenile, and a bit ego-centric. I mean, come on, when guys (or girls) start molding you into a fantacy woman, as if you were clay, there's somthing a bit weird going on.
I'd be p*ssed. And so should you.
Guys... TSK TSK, they will never know how they make us feel. He should know that you are you have your own style and he would not like it if you were to tell him to look like Vin Diesel for example. You should not let anyone change the way you are even if it's the appearance. Please update!
I think he is just asking you do mix it up and do some different stuff sexually. I think this is his way of telling you he is bored with the same old same old. My girlfriend and I try to stay open to new things especially when it pleases each other. In fact, I recently just admitted to her that I had been a bit of a hypocrite when it comes to her occasional smoking. I found out that it can actually arouse me in certain situations...like at Halloween when she was dressed up, and recently when I met her out after I got back from a work trip and we decided to do some role play -- me the biz man in town, and her the school teacher who let her hair down and played dirty girl.
Did you read the question before you bothered to answer?
Yes I did. Why do you ask?
wtf! that's really sad... a guy should love you for u... but they will have fantasies! I don't think you need to change yourself for anyone.. and no one ever should want to change u. If this guy can't love you for you then he is not worth it... hope that helps a bit -JoaHelp
He's an idiot.
the dangers of porn revealed again. he shouldn't watch porn while dating you, you should be all he needs. as far as I am concerned if you allow him to watch porn you to have an open relationship, between you, him and his hand. you can't compete with hand and a bloody good imagination when porn is in the picture. he should be lustingover you, not some porn star. how long before he asks you to do really weird twisted freakish sh*t. say no more porn. do you know how many marraiges porn has broken up.
yeah that is weird, I keep porn seperate. I don't really want my girl to be lie a porn star. that is gross, I only jerk off to that. don't want it in real life, want a nice girl.
wow, you must have a fantastic ass if you are on the track team. he is crazy!
it sounds like he has a personal fantasy...il agree sasha grey is mezmerizing...in a way but if I had a girlfriend I don't think id think much of sasha grey...ur just gonna have to tell him there is only so much you can do...if he still presists you gotta snap reality to him...i think that if he loves you he will understand
Dump him if you haven't already :)
Tell him you're willing to try to look more like Ron Jeremy.
That's not normal. I would be so sad if my boyfriend ever said anything close to that. Talk to him about it and tell him how you feel. He needs to like you for you, not what he wants you to look like.
dump him soooooooooo not worth your time. go find someone way better who APPRECIATES YOU FOR YOU! good luck:D
I think Sasha is actually overrated. I think the only reason she's so popular is because she has the easiest name to remember.
I can honestly say, I watch a lot of porn. And I can't remember a single one of their names. =|
say him to be like a celeb you like... to grow his penis two more inches and all that ...or tell him to go to sasha grey
Lol love ur answer.
Thnk you :)
This guy is campaigning really hard for Douchenozzle- of- the- year!
Do what you want, but I'd tell him to pack sand!
You should kick him in the balls, I am friends with adult film star Bree Olsen and when she isn't in front of a camera she barely wears any makeup at all and usually pulls her hair back. Tell him to keep dreaming..
here is a pic of us together with her in civilian mode
link
Here is her "working" (SFW)
link
Awh she looks adorable in "civilian mode." (PS: I don't think you should have used working in quotes - kinda implies that its not work)(but I get no worries). Thanks. Yeah, some people don't realize that pornstars ar real women with real lives (and I know its not convenient for guys to think that way). Bu there are a lot of girls out there who DO daily wear lo of makeup, hair extentions,etc. I just don't want to have to turn into somebody else.
Omg she looks so "normal"!
She's pretty without all of that make-up
tell him what you want him to do, then your both happy.
You should still go to the gym to get an even nicer body, then in 6 months or a year or so your boyfriend cannot complain AT ALL trust me. Working out will make you look so much better.
I have a pretty nice body if I do say so myself. My training schedual for track is pretty intense and honestly, I'm not going to go to the gym more than 5 times a week. Plus I'm not into the muscular women look. I like my body the way it is, but thanks.
So her boyfriend can insult her and put her down and she should go to the gym to get a nicer body to please him? WTF?
He insults her and she should follow what he says?Stupid answer much?
Say exactly that to him !
see how he replies and then if he can't except you for who you are, you deserve someone better hunni
xxx
Thanks. I have no clue how to talk to him about this though. Cause he seems to think its perfectly normal.
Haha! that's not (perfectly normal) that bitch is a HOE I don't care wut any1 says....if she f***in dudes and gettin paid 4 it (on da streets or in da business sh*t) that's a hoe and you don't need him or any1 like him