Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health +1 y
Should I go to a hooker or an escort since I am 21 and still a virgin? Isn't 21 too old to still be a virgin?
Anonymous
I am a 21 year old guy, still a virgin, I will be 22 next year in January, I am still a virgin, never had a girlfriend. I've tried getting a girlfriend before, but I fail whenever I take the initiative and pursue a girl. Almost all the time, all the girls I were interested in had a boyfriend already,I have asked girls out before, but they were taken or they rejected me, and the other times they let me have their real phone number, but they never answered or called me back. Also I am not very outgoing, I don't get many opportunities to meet new people and socialize, I don't have a lot of friends. Anyway, is 21 too old for a guy to still be a virgin? Should I go see a Hooker or an Escort?
Updates:
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I am uncomfortable being a virgin because I feel I have missed out on what most people are doing around my age, because almost everyone, an overwhelming majority of people lose their virginity before they enter their 20's.
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I don't want to become a 30 or 40-year old virgin, I am hoping I can lose my virginity before age 25. So should I go see a hooker or an escort since I don't know how to play my cards right with the Ladies?
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I don't know how to get a girlfriend because I've never had one before.
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Since I have never had a girlfriend, what should I do? I want to lose my virginity already.
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If 21 is not too old, around what age should I have lost my virginity?
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How old is too old to be a virgin?
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Us Guys have it harder because we usually have to initiate everything when it comes to women.
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I have a hard time meeting girls because I'm not very outgoing, I don't have a lot of friends.
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It's very uncomfortable, because being a virgin at age 21 or older is very rare, and I don't like being a rare kind of person.
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I'm gonna be 22 in 5 months in January of next year, I don't like being a virgin because an overwhelming majority of people lose their virginity before they enter their 20's, I don't like being a late bloomer.
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So being a virgin at 21 is not as bad as I am making it out to be?
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So is it a good thing that I am still a virgin at 21? or not?
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Because for me, getting a girlfriend is the hardest thing in the world for me.
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I bet it would probably take me longer to get a girlfriend than to solve a Rubiks cube, and I bet Navy SEAL training would not be as tough as getting a girlfriend.
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Asperger Synrome and the fact that I went to 3 high schools have to be the main reasons why I'm not a social person.
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I want to have sex with a hooker, because I can't because I am unemployed and I can't get job, maybe suicide is the option now.
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Should I or not?
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What Girls & Guys Said
17 23idk dude I'm basically in the exact same boat as you, except I'm a little older and have been with one girl. can't get another to save my life and the one I did have was my cousins ex, starting to get desperate
So you have only gotten laid with one girl?
If you did, you would miss out on something special- a REAL first time. Also, here's a big tip: lose all self doubt! The only way you'll be awkward is if you doubt yourself. Just be sure of yourself by knowing that when you are- you WILL be the cool, attractive guy you feel and hold yourself to be. "The only thing you have to fear is fear itself". And by the way, I'm 19 and I am a virgin- there is no shame in not being some young teenager when you lost it. Its different for everyone an 21 is def not old.
Yeah but most people lose their virginity before their 20's.
Sex is good but not so "special" that it's an soul shaking experience. The man wants to lose his virginity. Unfortunately nobody is eager to help him lose it. What else is a man to do? Masturbate forever?
...well I think that using a hooker would be ridding yourself of a lot of dignity. Do you even know who these hookers are? NO girl would sell her body for money unless she's something like a crackhead who is desperate for money for her next fix. And she'll probably be loaded with diseases that you'll get. If that's what you do, I don't care, I'm just telling you how it is.
Us guys have to work harder to get someone to have sex with us than girls do, because us guys have to initiate.
All the girl has to do is accept it or deny it.
Thats not really the case...yeah guys are usually hornier in general, but it takes 2 to tango. you have to look out for body language and stuff because girls aren't going to say "want to f***" (and if a guy said that expect a slap). And if girls aren't giving you the signs to make a move, maybe your coming off as unnapealing (I can give a lot of advice for that but I don't know who you are. if you want to explain what your like, id be glad to help)
Well I might have Asperger Syndrome, which is a mild form of Autism, my Psychologists speculates that I might have it, but he is not completely sure. I have a hard time meeting new people and making friends because I'm not very outgoing, like I don't have the life of the party, I don't have a lot of close friends.
Then that's what your problem is. I know it must be tough, I have a brother with asperger syndrome. What you need to work on is communication and how to express yourself to other people so that you come off as friendly, not cold. Read up on body language- being able to understand people better and letting them see what you want them to can really help you. And remember, other people aren't as different from you as you think. Everyone just wants to be loved, so if you can learn to be friendly
Then people WILL respond positively. If you ever want to talk to me about anything, I'm here for you. I know what its like to deal with social problems (im learning to overcome shyness).
I guess males with asperger syndrome are not meant to have girlfriends right?
I think men with asperger syndrome have it a lot harder than women with asperger syndrome when it comes to dating and relationships, boyfriend/girlfriend, etc. Because usually us guys are expected to take the initiative, make the first move and ask the girl out, pursuing her.
What? that's not what I meant.... I just meant that you should learn to handle it the best you can for an improvement in your relationships. jeez.
Well I've never had a girlfriend and I don't know how to get one.
I'm sure 99% of the planet will disagree with me; but here is the honest straight answer.
Yes. 21 is too old to be a virgin assuming you actually want to have sex. If you're not interested in sex or you are remaining celibate for religious reasons that's a different story but if you actually want to get laid you're getting the short end of the stick, and I'm sorry to hear that.
I don't know if you want to visit a prostitute though to be honest. There is always a risk of disease, and I've met some (no I didn't buy!) they are really rude and just awful 'people' who charge too much money.
My advice is to treat women like crap, probably the same way they treat guys...at this age they just shop around for the one they can take the most from or who their friends think will look best as arm decor, kinda like choosing a hand bag.
Find a clean non-whore lady, and get to know her (but keep her at a distance so she doesn't get to know you) once you know what she is seeking in a guy [probably something rather generic] show off your finest acting skills, do some research and then BECOME that person she thinks she wants. Then leave her. Don't worry, she'll find someone else.
You have your whole life to find someone to love you for who you are; but you shouldn't have to wait for sex. All humans deserve to get laid, just as we all deserve food, and water. This sounds terrible but if you're a unique person, finding someone you can truly connect with and that will be willing to sex you will take time and hard work--lots in fact.
Yeah, because when it comes to getting laid from a chick at a Bar or a Club, or just a girl to have casual sex with, whatever, getting laid without having to pay for it, us guys have to play our cards right, we have to make it happen, we have to make the first move, initiate everything, it's unfair but oh well, girls can get laid whenever they want to.
NO save your virginity for the right person and if you can't wait then think about the decision of getting a hooker and see if its worth it. :)
have you done anything else physically e.g. kiss, feel her up, get a BJ or go down on a girl?
I've gotten a BJ and I have gone down on a girl before, kissed and feel her up, just no peneatration.
Umm, that's sex already. that's oral sex. don't you think?! eww. Anyway, to each their own but yeah, you lost yours when you did those things. I think it's more important for the woman because she is the one that you can physically tell whether or not they are a virgin. but yeah oral sex is sex, even if there was no penetration. the missionary position I read was just traditional, but yeah, you're not a virgin anymore. Virginity really means they are innocent of EVERYTHING even kissing.
i don't think you should go see a hooker, my friend you are very young and there's no need to go in that path. If you do you will regret it, your doing fine right now. Perhaps you don't understand or realize it but you are, I think your in college or doing a career you seem as if your going through college. That is good, keep it up! well there are countless women that would love to be with you, hell you can get a girlfriend very easily. Alright, there's nothing wrong with being a virgin! I mean you lose it with someone you love, just to discourage you of the escort service well 1 in 4 people have herpes, 1 in 3 have hpv, and you as a virgin are automatically disqualified of those statistics.There's also ghonorrea, syphillis, chlamydia, and hiv. Those are all risks if you take the path of an escort service, sure you can use a condom, but on average there around 86% effective. Meaning that 14 out of 100 people get stds with condoms. I know how you feel, I felt the same way but I decided to get the escort service, worst mistake of my life. I was worried sick for a year about stds, I didn't get an std but it took me a whole year to be able to get conclusive results for hiv, do you really want to spend 1 year of your life worrying about having an std? I don't think so. You think girls don't like you or watever, well they do! Realize who you are, believe it or not you are important, a lot of the things that have happened to your family have happened thanks to you, good and bad. If it weren't for you things would be unimaginably different to those around you. You want to realize who you are, well I suggest you start going to the gym and getting your swell on. Analyze everything you have accomplished, you have also done good things, remember those good things that you have done. Be confident, go to the mall and talk to evry girl you like, if you get rejected doesn't matter keep trying. Eventually you will become confident enough and with enough charisma to get a girl you like, but you must practice!
I know you have probably heard this a lot but...seriously do not. You will most likely regret it for the rest of your life if you give it up to some hooker. It is not about when, it is about who. that right girl might be hard to find but if you are in a place with a lot of people just step out of your comfort zone, take the initiative just to get to know a couple girls briefly before you make a move and see if the are into you or not.You can tell by the way they are acting, they probably won't tell ou. But for goodness sakes do not lose it to a hooker. the worst idea. seriously.
Well I suck at taking the initiative, I have been rejected too many times already and I don't know what it is that I have been doing wrong, I have Asperger Syndrome in case you don't know..
Lose your virginity when you are good and ready; girls LOVE guys like you, plus, sex is not all of that considering the consequences that you deal with when you want to participate in this type of activity. A hooker nor an escort is a good idea; that's disgusting. Later on in life, do you really want to remember your first time being with some, and excuse my language, a whore? Come on, now. You deserve to have a beautiful, classy woman in your life; sex is an intimate thing and you should want to share that with someone who actually loves you and cares about. The only way you'll ever get a girlfriend is if you learn some self-respect. Virginity is not a curse, you're not going to die if you don't have a gang-bang with six bimbos. I'm 16, and a virgin. I am in no rush to have sexual intercourse because it is not a necessity to live in this world.
I think you really need to re-evaluate this situation because sex isn't some game, there are serious consequences and yes, death is one. You're 21, I'm sure you know, STD's, Pregnancy, etc; teachers and parents brand that warning in our heads for a reason because it's not a joke. My suggestion to you is to, wait and before you know it, you'll meet an amazing girl and you'll be making sweet love in no time.
Yeah but most people lose it before they enter their 20's.
Well dude honestly I'm the same way as you.. I Just turned 22 and was still a virgin. After much thought I finally gave into my needs and hired an escort to come over! While I'm Not proud of my actions it was something I felt I had to do
wtf do you want us to say?
Here's a novel idea, how about the truth?!
...?
dude you don't listen to people, just go bang a f***ing hooker and get over it seriously I've been watching this question for a long time and its really funny, its not a bad thing but you look desperate so go do it but don't come here and be like oh sh*t I should have waited afterwards.
Well 21 is a bit too old to be a virgin.
How many people have told you its not? you don't listen so take the other guys advice and go see a hooker instead you are here still trying to get answers what do you actually want us to say?
no offense but it is pathetic..
Its pure peer pressure, what the hell is wrong with being a virgin? I seriously don't get this and I am really sick of seeing this question or thread on many sites.
Stop being so desperate!
Well I am desperate!!!, because being a virgin at 21 is kinda awkward and weird.
Dude don't be stupid!
So are you saying that being a virgin at age 21 is not wrong at all?
Why the hell in the world would it be wrong???
Update: It's very uncomfortable, because being a virgin at age 21 or older is very rare, and I don't like being a rare kind of person. after reading this; I honestly think that you have to either get a life and stop complaining or just go and have your way with a hooker!
Give me reasons why it is not wrong to be a virgin? and Yes I am thinking about going to a hooker, since I don't know how to play my cards right when I am at a Bar or a Club.
WELL EVEN IF I GIVE YOU ANSWERS YOU WILL NOT LISTEN TO WHY WOULD I EVEN BOTHER? do whatever you want, I am starting to think that you are getting off to the replies on this question... like look at all the guys and girls did any of them say its a bad thing?
Just ignore this guy. He is an insensitive troll. Telling a sexually deprived guy to 'stop being so desperate' is like telling a starving man 'Hey, stop being so hungry' he is a fool who lacks empathy for those with different life experiences.
The thing is its not only me, its nearly everyone on this thread that says that there is nothing wrong with the OP, but the OP does not care about what we people say.
BlueGender said; Just ignore this guy. He is an insensitive troll. Telling a sexually deprived guy... I am nearly the same age and I have no problem being a virgin.. So seriously there is nothing wrong with this dude he is just insecure and is saying that there's something wrong, nobody on this question said there was anything wrong with him! but he is not listening to us, my question is if you are not going to listen why are you even asking it, are you hoping that someone will say, ur weird?
Well it's a lot easier for women to get laid than it is for men.
No, don't do that for God's sake.
Why? almost everyone loses their virginity before their 20's, I feel behind.
21 is too old.
Dude, seriously. Get a life. Virginity isn't the only thing making life worth living. Being a virgin or not, doesn't mean you're a loser. You gotta have better self esteem/outlook than that. Don't let people bring you down.
These girls do not care about you. If they did, they would give you legitimate advice on your situation. Instead they give you whimsical answers and fairy tale endings that will likely never happen. They aren’t helping you get girlfriends either. Girls are selfish creatures by nature and they simply want want want. In all honesty, sex to a man is not like it is to a woman. A woman is f***ed. She receives it both sexually and emotionally. A man most likely does not.
If you are serious about getting a hooker or prostitute, I can’t advocate breaking any laws, but you got to do what you must. I think if you have sex with a girl whether she’s a chick at a bar or a hooker or any girl putting herself out there, would boost your confidence more. This wouldn’t directly solve your awkward moments but you would feel more confident rest assured and feel more complete as a man.
Bottem line: Don’t let girls rule you, go out seek what is yours, and claim it.
Yeah but it's hard getting laid from a chick at a bar because you gotta play your cards right, a girl is not gonna come on to me.
Yes I know. That's why I'm saying whatever you can do. If you can't get a bar chick, do the alternative. Does it matter if its a chick from a night club or a prostitute? Aren't they the same thing? One has sex for money the other has sex to validate herself. Go figure.
Well I think a Prostitute is more likely to have STD's than a chick from a Bar or a Club. In order to get a one-night stand from a woman at a Bar or Club, you gotta have good social skills, good conversation, small talk skills, the right body-language. But for a Prostitute/Escort, all you gotta have is money, no small talk or conversation involved. The Supply of available,beautiful, hot, single women is very low, and the demand for them by us guys is very high.
no hookers or escorts!
i'm 21 and am a virgin and i would love be w a guy who is too.
its a gift you give someone you love and care about do just throw it away
Well thank you, I'm glad I'm not alone.
It's just that I feel uncomfortable being a virgin sometimes because it seems almost everyone loses their virginity before they enter their 20's.
The average age range people lose their virginity is 16-17.
In today's world it seems that a large percent of people are feelin pressure to have sex. I think better to be ready or love someone then give in to the world..Really to be honest with you I have quiet a few friends who waited to have sex until they were ready to and my bestfriend katie was 20 when she lost it... I find that guys have more respect for me and I'm 100% sure that a lot of girls have respect for you to. I tell every guy I ever date look I'm still a virgin its something to be proud of :-)
Well I think society and the media, culture, pressures guys to lose their virginity more than it does for girls.
Wow why would you think that? I mean use girls have a lot of pressure put on us too..
What kind of pressure do girls get?
Lets see here to measure up to everyday women sex icon.. and when a guy dose't understand that she's not gonna just throw it away. and do you think that girls don't talk about sex too? I mean really? if you look at todays world I have to say this but its class A f***ed up as far as in sex appeal
So are you serious that you are still a virgin at age 21?
Yes
Well thank you, it's just hard to be a virgin because you feel surrounded by people who are non-virgins.