I keep seeing over and over on here that women have unreasonably high standards. I find that odd, and I'll probably elaborate in a take, but basically, it comes down to 2 main issues. They aren't high standards by any means, and even if they are, thats not a bad thing.
1. I remember that there was a question (many actually) asking if we'd rather have a nice or hot partner. And I said it's either both or I dont want him. And then in one particular question, the responses were full of hate and malice. "Ugh, women's standards are so unreasonable and yet they only have pussy to offer smh." "Future cat lady here." "I hope you get cheated on stupid whore for not giving nice guys like me a chance" etc etc. Of course not all responses were that bad, but really? How is that unreasonably high, that's the basis of most relationships. You want someone who's looks attracts you, and personality keeps you.
2. Not a bad thing in my opinion because I personally date forever or for never, and I want to be happy with my partner.
And then there's lots of questions like "do men care about if you have a job?"
And they say "no, women are the ones with high standards." But then its like, they complain that she didn't offer to pay for the first date (um, hello, how can she if she's unemployed?)
So are mens standards really so low? Or is that they are more willing to settle? I feel that maybe men do have high standards, and because of female bias in relatiionships/dating, they are more likely to settle, because they have less options. Of course NOT ALL MEN, but the average man doesn't receive as much as attention as the average woman.
So what do you think? And sorry if you're so sensitive that this question offends you.
To many guys on here, THIS is "high standards", pfffttt. Lol
Do men have lower standards than women?
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Updates:
+1 y
Personally, I think it's men that have high standards.
To be desirable:
Be light skin, colored eyes, pink nipples, big boobs, skinny stomach, big butt, curvy, young like 17-25, long curly hair. This isn't even the fact that her personality:
Traditional, yet independent and not ever need his money, virgin or low sex count yet horny for him, nice, smart, caring, etc
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265145-women-after-30-are-no-longer-as-attractive-agree-of-disagree
To be desirable:
Be light skin, colored eyes, pink nipples, big boobs, skinny stomach, big butt, curvy, young like 17-25, long curly hair. This isn't even the fact that her personality:
Traditional, yet independent and not ever need his money, virgin or low sex count yet horny for him, nice, smart, caring, etc
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265145-women-after-30-are-no-longer-as-attractive-agree-of-disagree
3 0
What Girls & Guys Said
21 84Oh my.. i've clicked the wrong sentence
Of course women have higher standards. In everything
I disagree, men are the ones with high standards:
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265219-what-color-nipples-do-you-prefer-on-female-breast
Personally, I think it's men that have high standards.
To be desirable:
Be light skin, colored eyes, pink nipples, big boobs, skinny stomach, big butt, curvy, young like 17-25, long curly hair. This isn't even the fact that her personality:
Traditional, yet independent and not ever need his money, virgin or low sex count yet horny for him, nice, smart, caring, etc
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265145-women-after-30-are-no-longer-as-attractive-agree-of-disagree
Girls say they have high standards but then they date guys who don't meet them.
Men say they have no standards but then they dump girls who don't meet them.
Omg, you literally summed it up! I think you'll get MH
Awesome thanks!
That's true, But a Girl would Dump a Guy a lot earlier than a Guy would Dump a Girl.
no its just that there is many deluded women with no self awareness and too ridiculous standards. its not that men have too low standards, its the contrast with the ridiculous standards of some women that make it seem like that.
I agree
Id disagree. Men's standards are far more ridiculous and unreasonable:
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265219-what-color-nipples-do-you-prefer-on-female-breast
Personally, I think it's men that have high standards.
To be desirable:
Be light skin, colored eyes, pink nipples, big boobs, skinny stomach, big butt, curvy, young like 17-25, long curly hair. This isn't even the fact that her personality:
Traditional, yet independent and not ever need his money, virgin or low sex count yet horny for him, nice, smart, caring, etc
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265145-women-after-30-are-no-longer-as-attractive-agree-of-disagree
you don't speak for me so shut up
These are just a relatively small subset of guys. I bet there are some women with fairly unrealistic expectations because of the attention your gender is set up to get. Guys high rate of using women for sex and a less frequent seriousness about commitment in general, probably mentally equalizes this for most women long term. It balances out.
Men might settle for less, but that doesn't mean they really wanted to!
as long as you got love you don't need anything else
Yes most men have lower standards than women, for the simple reason that most men have a more realistic set of standards.
On another post I over simplified my answer, and said that men marry for love and women married for financial security and social status.
I have talked to a few women about their dating practices, and what they want in a future husband. This one girls answer, she wanted a hot looking guy, had to be in shape and buff, had to be in a white color job and have ambition (what ever that means).
Now lets look at this woman that told me this, she is not ugly but on the plain side, she is over weight and I am not talking about pleasingly plump here, she works as a maid and is a single mother.
Another told me she wanted a guy that was good looking, had his own business because she did not want to work and would take her on exotic vacations
Now she was on the pretty side, a bit above average, but not someone you could have a real conversation with. If it did not involve fashion, some kind of social event, gossip or about her, forget talking. She is also often, unemployed.
When asked what they had to bring into a relationship with the men they described, they could not answer aside from saying sex.
Are these 2 women's standards realistic, in respect to what they have to offer to the men they described?
Most men have realistic standards, we want a woman that is attractive. A woman with average looks is fine, if we get a female with above average looks bonus. We want a woman that we can talk to, about anything. We want a woman that makes us feel good, and feel appreciate.
Basically we men, will take any woman that smiles at us talks to us and is willing to spend time with us. But the big difference between men and women, is that we men will usually stick to the women within our financial/social group. Women on the other hand, tend to want a men that is from a higher financial/social group than the one they are in.
What makes the standard they have unrealistic for most women, is that don't have anything to offer that man besides sex.
I think men's standards are unreasonable:
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265219-what-color-nipples-do-you-prefer-on-female-breast
Personally, I think it's men that have high standards.
To be desirable:
Be light skin, colored eyes, pink nipples, big boobs, skinny stomach, big butt, curvy, young like 17-25, long curly hair. This isn't even the fact that her personality:
Traditional, yet independent and not ever need his money, virgin or low sex count yet horny for him, nice, smart, caring, etc
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265145-women-after-30-are-no-longer-as-attractive-agree-of-disagree
I thought we were talking about real men, not horny teens and college boys. When a boy matures somewhere between 25 and 27, and becomes a real man. He starts to look beyond a females physical beauty, and starts looking at how she acts and treats him. So yes I guess that his standards become unreasonable, to a woman that has nothing going for herself besides her looks and is not willing to really invest her real self in a relationship.
No, this is many men. Even older guys say this stuff.
And is where is this information coming from, is it the same source that says. all men prefer blonds, that all men want a woman with big breasts? It always amazes me, that women can have 8 men tell them it does not matter to them about something. Than have 2 men tell them something they want to believe, than what the 2 men tell them becomes what most men want. You need to really take a look at the information you are reading, than look at the women most men are in relationships with. Is there a correlation, between what you have read and with what you see when you see most couples.
Not just 2 men, 70% is more than 2. Im going off you're little analogy of course, and this is since I've been on this site, back in 2014. Pink and light skin has always gotten at least 70% rate on all the polls I've seen.
Typically men have lower standards when it comes to personality, while higher standards when it comes to looks.
Most men just want a kind, loving, cute wife. That doesn't really apply to me because I have high standards for both lol even higher for personality than looks.
Why did you get a downvote? LMAO. And I guess that makes sense. Do you think a lot of these guys standards are just unreasonably low?
Probably a guy who wanted me to say men have low standards lol I think most guys don't know they have higher standards than they do. Like they say what they want in a woman, but when it comes to reality, they end up wanting more from her than they initially said they wanted. So they appear to have unreasonably low standards, but in reality it's not that low. Obviously you're gonna get guys with very low standards, but I don't think that's common, and usually applies to guys filled with insecurities, who will take any girl because they don't know when another one will come by.
I have high standards.
Probably explains why I'm single :P
I genuinely think the stereotypes are true, and there's good tedious biological reasons for them, which I'm sure someone has elaborated on. But all men have a choice, and I'm not being in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship. Men can elevate themselves and their power in relationships without recourse to a woman.
With regard to your update, I think standards from both genders always knead one's insecurities. So if one feels insecure about being a provider as a male, or being a very narrowly delineated beauty as a female, then one must remember that it is often the insecurity that is speaking. You always talk about how you don't meet certain requirements, but it's possible that you're tuning into all the negativity because you're negative about certain aspects of yourself, yourself? So maybe if you changed your mindset you'd start to appreciate yourself more and feel more attractive? It's the elusive confidence, mademoiselle.
We have lower standards than women in general. However, since we ask for less, the things that we do ask for carry more value to our lives. I'm not saying women's standards don't have value (as long as it's not astrology) but here's an analogy to explain what I'm saying. Women have 30 boxes (their standards) and each of them weigh about 1/2 a pound. Men have 4 boxes but each box weighs 40 pounds. That's what I am referring to.
I voted A but I think the difference is mainly in terms of their looks... ladies are more worried when a little something in their make-up or outfit is not okay. Guys are a lot more tolerant as long as it's just a detail.
In terms of behavior or attitude I don't think the standards are so much different.
I think men's standards are higher:
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265219-what-color-nipples-do-you-prefer-on-female-breast
Personally, I think it's men that have high standards.
To be desirable:
Be light skin, colored eyes, pink nipples, big boobs, skinny stomach, big butt, curvy, young like 17-25, long curly hair. This isn't even the fact that her personality:
Traditional, yet independent and not ever need his money, virgin or low sex count yet horny for him, nice, smart, caring, etc
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265145-women-after-30-are-no-longer-as-attractive-agree-of-disagree
Nice certainly, that's the nr 1 criterium for me! :D All the rest I can take if she's nice... and I'll do what I can to be nice as well, even when trouble is up.
First point i want to make, and i stress this - is to remember the demographic you're seeing this from.
Second point - While both girls and guys settle to some degree, only guys with issues have truly low standards. No confidence, the fear of being alone, ashamed of their looks etc. Guys who are comfortable in their own skin, their place in the world and who give zero fucks will find and get the women they want.
Third point - Even for confident successful guys, the bar for having sex is WAY lower than the bar for a relationship.
So these men are losers? lol
I don't really want to use that term, BUT when was the last time you saw a halfway decent and successful guy truly settle for someone way "below" him? It reminds me, I was out with my girlfriend having dinner yesterday and we were surrounded by men who almost universally had a well-matched partner with them. Even the older gents had women who must have been attractive in their early years. I wouldn't call someone a loser who hasn't made it YET, i'd call them losers if they give up and complain about it.
@Cosytoasty By definition "successful" guys are only a minority of the population and even they usually have partners who rate below them, maybe not in looks but in education or career wise. Even if they both went to university and work full time he's likely to have done a more difficult major and have a higher position.
@JohnDoe3000 You date the total sum though, if she's stunning but only a B student you'll date. If she's merely attractive and an A student you'll date aswell. In total however you won't date a C student who is average looking. The whole idea of bankers, doctors and lawyers dating blonde bimbos who are only qualified for PA's is completely untrue, they date other women in those industries by and large. These girls almost all came from middle/upper class backgrounds and went to good schools - they are certainly not below the men at all. Successful guys are in the minority, but in the west there are zero obstacles to becoming successful. You can study/work hard, go work out at the gym and dress well and be outgoing of your own free will... Then you don't have to settle. If some dude gave up on this at 70 it's understandable, but guys in their 20's giving up and lowering their standards? You'll agree that is moving away from winner territory.
"Successful guys are in the minority, but in the west there are zero obstacles to becoming successful." This is only so because many other people don't try or don't have the brains, etc... So for the population as a whole it's a different story.
Everyone generally wants to maximize their worth. That is just a common trait humans exhibit
Both genders are able to project that standard
Female - through many options
Males - through superiority. Cultures and religions for the most part male dominated
Males settle and so do females, however as for who has the higher standards? Both do equally just in different areas
--> females, it's comes down to wealth and security
--> males it's most often attractiveness and beauty
> which is why if you are unstable and a poor investment for her, you are shit out of luck
> and for women, if you are conventionally 'unattractive' you'll notice the lack of quality men coming your way
Being more willing to settle effectively means having lower standards.
Men definitely have much lower standards when it comes to anything but looks, does that outweigh having higher standards for looks (if they do at all)? Who's to say...
I wouldn't say men have low standards but just reasonable standards. I do believe that women have unreasonablely high standards and unless you are within the very lucky few that meet those standards you have pretty much no luck. To attract a women you need to look a certain way, make a certain amount, believe same thing as them, act a certain way in one situation and different in the next, you need to be nice, sweet and sensitive but only at certain times. And the list goes on. But for men you just need to look acceptable and not be a bitch.
I even remember reading a paper proving this by looking at the match history of people on dating sites. It gave everyone a number from 1-10 based on their rating by other members. It founder that men wold choose to match with women of their rank and up. While almost all women would only choose to match with the highest rated men.
So from my experience men have reasonable expectations while women have very high standards.
I'd disagree. I don't think it's unreasonable, in adults, to expect him to work or go to school and be attractive and kind.
But it is more than just those few things that women expect, or least in my experience. You need to make at least a certain amount of money at that job or you're not good enough. You can't work to much tho. As for attractive you have to look like you could be a male model, no fat, good looks and muscles. Even then you can expect her to try and change your appearance or style to better fit her ideal. Women just have so much criteria a man has to live up to in order to be with her and for most women these ideals can't be achieved by most men. Or at least that is how it seems to me based on my experiences. I do believe men are a lot easier to please, a woman just need to be attractive to his level, nice and not a bitch. I think this is why I think you see a lot more men putting less effort into women. Their standards are just to high that most men feel it isn't worth trying anymore since faced with the impossible to live up to most women's standards.
What about what men expect?
Light skin, colored eyes, pink nipples, young, virgin or low sex count, big boobs, skinny stomach, big butt, long curly hair, etc etc.
That doesn't even include the fact that she has to be nice, traditional yet still independent, can work but not make more money than him, etc etc. Oh, and no daddy issues.
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265145-women-after-30-are-no-longer-as-attractive-agree-of-disagree
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2265219-what-color-nipples-do-you-prefer-on-female-breast
unreasonably high standards
I guess, we, women have higher standards even if we want to admit or not. Men can have high standards too... but we tend to be more picky.
I do think women are far more selective than men. Because we will be carrying his offspring for 9 months and we don't want to make a bad investment.
In general, I dont agree because I think that my standards are quite high (maybe its good maybe bad) for a relationship partner. Nevertheless, I have to say that sometimes I just want to be with a beautiful girl, so my stadards are really low. But thats more for sexual things not for a relationship
Nope we have way higher standards while most women only care about personality.
I dont like fat girls. So she can't be fat, stomach must be smaller than mine. muscular, or lean is acceptable.
She has to be well kept, know how to dress, be confident, know how to be sexy, must be a freak like me, or more of a freak, know how to manage her time like me, have a job, a drivers license, her own car, but I can tolerate not having a car, but at least have a drivers license. know how a man acts, know how to manage money, knows how to take care of business. and must know how to handle my business if im not present.
"Attraction is the basis of most relationships!"
Yes, and more than half of all marriages end in divorce, HMM, WHAT DO YOU KNOW?
Your base animal lusts aren't actually a good indicator of who you should be dating. You know, kind of like how if you only ate candy, you'd be fat? Because actually your taste buds aren't good indicators of what's nutritious, and that's why your brain should be in charge of your diet and not your taste buds?
Yeah well, your brain should be in charge of your sex life, too.
Um, it's not like I said I ONLY care about looks. But like I explained, I can't be with a person I'm not attracted to or else I'm going to grimace every time he leans in for a kiss and avoid sex.
What about you? Will you be young and beautiful forever, or will your beauty fade and fade, slowly at first, but then faster every year, until all the men you think are so attractive would grimace if YOU leaned in for a kiss? If you're 25, you've only got another decade at the most before your looks start going downhill instead of up. Who will find you attractive when you're not anymore? That's what I think of when I hear people say they can only be with attractive people. "Oh, you'll be young and pretty forever, will you? Hmm?" There's other things in life besides satisfying your base animal lusts. After the greatest orgasm of your life, you still have 23 hours and 59 minutes left in the rest of the day, that's a lot of life you still have to live through.
Exactly. I wouldn't want to be with someone who didn't find me physically attractive either
Yeah, 20 years later. . .
Attraction doesn't fade. I guess it's different with men and women because our tastes change with age while men stay wanting teens and 20yr olds. And there are lots of hot older guys. Even if he let's himself go or whatever I want to enjoy whatever amount of looks I can. Can you honestly fuck Rosie O Donell if she were the nicest thing to you? If you can, good for you. But the majority of people want someone who's looks and personality attracts them. We're not idiots I know with age we won't be at "our prime" anymore and that's fine because tastes mature with relationships.
Rosie O'Donald is your example of a nice person? LOL.
She's not nice. But I'm saying if she were, or Honey Boo Boo mom, would you seriously spend the rest of your life with her?
If my other option was a pretty girl who was dumb and mean, yes, I'd date the not-pretty girl who was dumb and nice. I've never seen a woman so attractive she could treat me like shit and I'd put up with it longer than about two days. Nobody's that pretty.
That's not what I'm asking. I'm saying if attractive and nice vs ugly and nice. Who would you go for?
Precisely why I date human beings, not their attributes.
You're dodging the question super hard
Yes, but the question is retarded, you think you've got me skewered here but it's really just a false dichotomy of two unreasonable examples. See, you think you can out-argue me, but I'm like way too impressive. My skills, just honed in fire you could never understand.
You're just going to keep avoiding the question I see
Technically, I'm allowed to. I've critiqued your question, and you haven't answered the critique, so I have technically "answered" your question.
img.fireden.net/v/image/1449/58/1449587560724.jpg
No, you have not. Thats not answer.
'Fraid so, check the rules. Your question was invalid because it's a logical fallacy, false dichotomy. I say this and you lose and that's how this works, m'kay?
No, you're just trying to be smart. That shits not cute. Just answer the question or stop trying to be slick.
I am smart. That's why you're losing this argument. You're out of your depth.
You're not smart. You act the part but fall short
Whereas you act the part of the fool flawlessly?
I know I'm not smart but I don't try to pretend lol