Do men typically get tired when the woman is the one riding them?

[Anonymous]

**TMI** It's been about a year now... I have noticed how my husband doesn't get on top anymore. He goes down on me and then I on him. But then he moves me into riding him and he doesn't return the favor. I finish the job. Don't get me wrong I love riding. However, it hasn't gone unnoticed.

I have asked him months later why he doesn't go on top and he says it's because he gets out of breath and tired. Then "it" goes limp. I have also noticed that when I ride for a while "it" goes limp too and HE is out of breath. And I was wondering if that happens to other guys too? When he used to be on top I wouldn't get as "tired" as he does. We used to take turns. Now he gets tired when I'm on top too. We literally have to take breaks while doing it. It has gotten to me a couple of times and I have cried thinking "it" goes limp because he isn't attracted to me anymore. He gets mad when I cry because of it, but it kinda hurts my feelings, ya kw? Thinking it's my fault. I don't have a problem getting wet naturally so it's not a lube issue.

Anyways he has gone to the doctor and everything seems to be working "fine". Same with me, doctor says I am "tight" down there. I think it might be his stamina, he used to work out and now doesn't anymore. I guess the only work out he would get most recently is going on top and now he doesn't even do that. He is only 30yrs old. Will this get worse over time?

Have you guys experienced this as well?

Sooo embarrassing to ask!! Sorry for the TMI subject.

[Finchie40]

Sadly it could mean he is losing the passion he once had with you , and he isn’t being honest with you on how he truly feels , cuz he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings or it could mean he is getting older and his testosterone levels decreased , especially if he is going limp during sex, it’s hard to give you valid answers because I don’t know how your relationship is with him. How long have you been together? And how often do you have sex? Most guys’ go through struggles with their penis , it mainly stems down to how often he has sex and ht also can stem down to his diet as well. Or if he is struggling with any kind of stress or anxieties , that I can take a toll on his erections. Have you tried viagra? Viagra is the best male drug on the planet , it only works if he is in the mood for sex , it will increase his blood flow to his penis making him have a longer harder erection , you will more than likely tap out before he does lol You can try Hims or Blue Chews as well , they work just as good as viagra and much cheaper than viagra.

[Effably]

Is he on anything? Drugs or otherwise?

As for losing erection. It is primarily a mental thing. But.

You are still right about exercise. Generally exercise makes us better at pretty much everything. From mood to sexual virility. So he absolutely should. Eating and exercising right does wonders.

As for men getting tired... for the finish? Sure. That alone makes us burn about 5x as much energy as a woman does during the act even if she did 100% of the work. Accurate numbers too. Before that? Not really.

Honestly most of the time when things are like this it is something else. Depression, stress, so on. But well. Feed him something healthy. Take him for a daily walk. Help fix whatver troubles him. And sooner or later you should be free of your own insecurities too and feeling more attractive to him than ever.

[MrOracle]

First, this is NOT your fault. It may not be entirely his fault either, but the responsibility is largely his.

I'm not a doctor, but erectile dysfunction (ED) is most commonly caused by stress, exhaustion, poor diet, poor health, or is a side effect of medicines (anti-depression meds - SSRIs - are a VERY common reason, but there are others). Booze or recreational drugs can also be a cause.

You would know better than us which of these might apply, but "not being attracted to the woman" is virtually never the reason.

Assuming that booze, recreational drugs, or prescribed meds aren't the issue, then stress or exhaustion (long work hours or lack of sleep) are likely the primary causes, but overall health and fitness are certainly contributing factors.

[Red_Arrow]

Our of breath and tired definitely sound like a health problem. I do not understand your doctor considering him in good health. The going limp sounds like an erectile dysfunction problem. He should see a doctor about that, but do not go out and find "medicines" to self treat that. They can cause serious heart problems!

The woman riding the man can be the best fun for both. The guy gets a great view of her bouncing on him, and his hands are free to touch anywhere on her, just to enjoy touching her and to help her enjoy the experience. And no reason for either to get tired. He is not working hard and she is controlling what she wants to do.

[summiter]

I think it is fun but it is more fun to mix things up to keep sex interesting

[spartan55]

Wtf? He is healthy, is only 30, and used to hit it every which way. To me, if a dude only wants to be ridden he is just lazy. The erectile issues are hard to explain. Is he under a ton of stress? Does he feel pressure to perform? Does he watch a lot of porn?

[Billlewis]

Maybe, I'm not sure.

[TommyMountainFigure]

You say he went to the doctor. Did the Doctor mention anything about going to a heart specialist?

[boggboss]

So I'm 29 about to be 30 and I think when I last checked I'm at 19 stone so I'm pretty fat and unhealthy and I have never been out of breath when my partner is ontop sure it can happen when I am but then u just learn to pace yourself I think he needs to be putting more effort it

[Bricealan]

No, really, that is not 'too much information" for a question posed like you have posed it. I am wondering about your hubby's overall health? If he is 30, I would question if he may have some cardiac problem, since a man that age should not be getting 'tired' the way you describe. Forget the thinking that "he is not attracted to me" as men can experience the loss or partial loss of erection for a lot of reasons, not related to his Libido.

I would look to have him see an MD for a blood work up and physical exam to find why he is "out of breath" during sex, because a 30 year old guy should not be having that kind of problem at his age. If he is 'exhausted' during sex, that is one reason he may be loosing his erection.

I wish you luck

[ProbablyClueless]

Not tired, no. Losing an erection is usually more mental than anything else.

[David94358]

Is he overweight?

[exitseven]

I get tired but not ss much as when I am leading.

[Nikki1989]

Well, my man certainly doesn't.

[TheSpaceGnome]

No, the person on top is the one prone to being tired, as they are doing all the work. It sounds like he is having the precursors to a heart attack. There is something more serious going on.

[DrPepper12]

No. If she's riding. It is tiring if guys on bottom trying to lift you and him while you're on top. Why not spooning, doggie, missionary, etc. Those take less energy IMHO

[kellytheman]

It’s never the girls problem it the guys who has the problem. As us guys get older we do get tired maybe a little easier then when we was in our 2Os and if not been working out could be another factor. He probably has low testosterone levels which is probably affecting his performance in the bedroom and he probably not mad at you but mad at himself not performing well. He just might need a little help like using vigara or some pill to keep him having an erection. I never really experienced yet but I do get tired easier and I do feel sometime in the near future I might need a little help to keep hard I also went to the doctor and got a testosterone boost supplement.

[jahaims]

You have to be in terrible shape to get tired from the bottom lol. He sounds like he is dealing with mental issues or isn't into you sexually anymore.

[KrakenAttackin]

He just likes having you ride him!

[Surely]

Is he extremely overweight? Taking medication, smoke cigarettes or just a couch potato? Can’t believe a doctor wouldn’t have some advice for the two of you!

[Dreamclouds]

no if she knows how to ride