Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Do you think it’s ok for your female partner/lover to fake an orgasm?

To me it’s better to lie to a guy he’s good in bed for the first time, if I tell him he’s horrible in bed it will affect his self esteem that’s why I think faking it is completely ok.

The first reason is: he won’t get upset, second: he won’t find out what he’s doing wrong, third: it will benefit me if I’m not so attached to him as he is to me and fourth: as long as he is satisfied in bed it doesn’t matter if I’m.

My aunt told me women are not supposed to love men so much but let your partner love you more rather than you love him. Basically I should love the guy a little but not too much. So when the man cheats she is less likely to let her emotions go out of control and she won’t get her feelings hurt. Men don’t get attached when it comes to sex but women do, so to save me the heartache I shouldn’t let my future husband know that I fake an orgasm.
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Superb Opinion

  • So basically what you're saying is the whole thing's fake and you will try better next time to me the whole thing sounds crazy
    If you we're my girlfriend ideal to look into your eyes tell by the way you breathe your mom the way you move your hips your touch not if you're Faking It but how good it when I just gave you if your boyfriend isn't pleasing you you need to tell him if you don't want to just come out and talk about it then do it while you're in bed whatever he's doing to you at the moment it is not pleasing you tell him to try it a different way if he's touching you not touching you right show him if he's kissing you he's not kissing you right show him anything that you want me to do to you you should be able to tell him with your eyes you can't did you need to show him you don't need to tell him by words show him play action by doing moan become that little actress that you are and show him what feels good so he can Incorporated in his thoughts as he's doing it to you because if you don't do that then he's not going to be worth the f*** in the next 2 months anyway his guys get lazy

Most Helpful Guy

  • Your aunt’s advice seems perfect if you want a mediocre life.

    It’s not OK to fake orgasms.

    First if all, if you’re doing to spare your partner’s feelings, imagine what will happen if your secret is discovered. That won’t boost his self esteem; it will destroy it.

    Secondly, don’t you *want* to have orgasms? Wouldn’t sex without ever having an orgasm be a chore? Wouldn’t it be frustrating to get worked up for nothing every time? Wouldn’t it lead to you resenting your partner? Wouldn’t it lead to you wanting sex less and less? Wouldn’t that lead to his resentment of you? Are any of those the outcomes you want?

    Your aunt seems like the most boring person I can imagine. Wouldn’t you rather have the exhilaration of having been in love and having a great sex life, even it meant that there was a risk of getting hurt?

    You don’t need to tell your partner he is horrible in bed. You can coach him gently without hurting his feelings. Direct his hand to your clit while you’re having sex. Have positive, encouraging reactions when something actually feels good. Ask for more of what gets you off. Most guys want to be rock stars in bed. You can exploit that for your own pleasure.

    Finally, if you lie the first time, aren’t you then trapped in a pattern of lying? Faking orgasms is a bad idea no matter how you look at it.

    There is one exception: If you never intend to have sex with him again because he smells, it hurts, or you regret your decision, you can use it to put a quick stop to it.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Every word of what you just wrote makes me sad.

    And the fact you would rather have a bad sex life and not even enjoy what you do with someone than to keep someone you spend so much time and energy on and are supposed to love at an arm's length is beyond me.
    It's a recipe for failure and I feel sorry for you. Doesn't sound like true happiness in a relationship and then... why be in one if that's the case?

    • But it would hurt his self esteem if he knows he’s bad in bed

    • A real partner want to see their partner having a good time. If they aren't the best in bed, then help them and tell them what you want. You don't need to tell them they are bad in bed, just help them improve.

  • There are ways to nicely and tactfully tell a guy what he could do to please you better. Instead of telling him he sucks or he’s bad in bed tell him it would be really hot if he did this or you’d really like it if he did that.


    You do not have to sacrifice your pleasure to save a guy’s ego. And you aren’t doing him any favors in the long run anyway.

    • You mean he will be able to find out I actually don’t receive pleasure?

    • I mean you can teach him what is pleasurable to you. That would be a pleasurable experience for both of you. I prefer to focus on the positive rather than the negative.

    • He won’t get offended right?

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 15

  • Yes and no, both in and outside a relationship there are times when it’s best approach.

    as you said first time is worth doing if you want to do more, but you need to give a bit more instruction or control him more.

    within a relationship you may need to, for example Partner is stressed and you know he is, then adding to it by not having good sex where you visibly / audibly Cum, could make things worse.

    it’s not a green light to do all the time, as couples should discuss it openly

  • It is not. It's a stupid thing to do. But the usual "I don't wanna hurt his feelings" that eventually are gonna do it worse than telling him "could you touch me here while you fuck me? I can't cum otherwise". Which unironically would make both considerably happy.

  • There is something in between saying he was horrible, and faking an orgasm. However, faking an orgasm under such circumstances is no big deal.

  • Outside off relationships sure inside off a relationship terrble idea

  • STOP FAKING ORGASMS. All it will ensure is that you remain unsatisfied and unhappy. Communication is extremely important. Yes, telling him the truth may make him feel embarrassed and/or hurt, but knowing that, adjust your approach to make sure that doesn't happen. Some women may even do very little, if anything, in bed and have the audacity to blame the man. They don't communicate what they want, what they enjoy. If you haven't put in effort, check yourself, but if you are doing what you can for him, then talk to him and let him know what you want for you because it is unfair for it to be one way. Faking your orgasm will accomplish nothing.

  • No, that's not okay. Why would you want to do something that would compromise your right to having good sex?

  • i don't think of it in normative terms. to me, it just appears to be quite a stupid move that has no long term benefit but only disadvantages for the person doing it.

  • Never lie. If he sucks he sucks.

  • No I don't, and Id be pissed about it. How's a guy suppose to improve if he's being lied too? You are only cheating yourself out of lots of pleasure.

  • No, a woman of mine would never fake an orgasm because she would have no reason to and if she did she is no longer a woman of mine because she was not being honest, and I expect full honesty because I am on deadly levels honest with people in general, so I expect he to as well to be like that.

  • Then he will never know what you truly want or what it truly takes to get you off and you will never be completely satisfied sexually with him.

  • That's pretty warped..

    You should prioritize honesty and find someone who proves themselves over time to be trustworthy.

    I have found people in my life who are loyal, you can too. Men in general aren't mindless savages, bad people are.

  • No.. I always want honesty. I can tell a fake orgasm anyway.

    Do you think that it’s ok fir a male partner to fake an orgasm with you? We do it!!

    • No it’s not a partner’s pleasure is important

  • No it's not

  • If he figures out that you're faking it (and he WILL figure it out) he will never trust you again. Why would you undermine trust in the most intimate setting?

  • if I figure it out she's taking it in the ass next time. then it's unnecessary to lie

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