Guy said he had sex with girls without a condom and pulled out before finishing?

I was messing around with the guy I'm dating when he said
"I should probably wear a condom before we have sex"
to which I replied "yeah, obviously, I'm not having sex without a condom".
Later, he said he had sex with girls with no protection and always pulled out before he came (bare in mind he also knows I'm a virgin, so perhaps thinks I'm not very aware)...
Is it normal to have sex without any protection? this has concerned me quite a bit because he is clearly not keen on using condoms, do you think I should end it with him?
... We get on well besides instances like this
0 2

Most Helpful Girls

  • This is why you wait until marriage to have sex. It is very natural and normal to have sex without a condom and birth control. Sex is an exchange of something and when physically done your exchanging bodily fluids. You should have learned this in sex ed. And if you were taught abstinence, then you would also know that abstinence IS safe sex. Not a condom or birth control. But here is the issue where he is a major red flag.

    1. He has sex without a condom. He is at greater risk of having STDs than those who don't wear one. It's as simple as that unless he has genital warts, gonorrhea, etc, which cannot be protected against with a condom because it depends on where on the genitals and how far it can go and how far condoms can fit on the person. The fact that the girls consented to that is an even BIGGER red flag.

    2. It is also stated that pulling out is NOT reliable if you're talking about not getting pregnant. Because it really all depends on YOU if you're not ovulating first. Basic sex education. A man's sperm can last in a woman 3-5 days and sometimes 7. A full week to get you pregnant, though it's rare, it is not impossible, especially for healthy sperm. It can survive in hot and cold environments but prefer warm which our bodies perfectly offer. A man can produce 3-5 million sperm but ejaculates 1-3 million when engaged in sexual intercourse with a woman, or in today's cases when they masturbate and have to release or else they get blue balls.

    It is normal to have sex without protection. That is how sex is supposed to work. It connects you to a man, but a condom is a barrier to that as is birth control. Birth control lowers your libido to none regardless if your periods are shorter or stopped due to a controlled environment as birth control is designed to do. But it's dangerous for a woman's body. How women naturally controlled when to have children, is not having sex on days she is ovulating and releasing an egg which is usually about a week after your menses. Your last bleed. For somebody like me who gets her period, not to have TMI, I tend to get it twice every other month. And ovulate 2 days directly after my last bleed. So that means if I had sex (I'm a virgin who disagrees with premarital sex) I have twice as likely to get pregnant easily. Because I release more eggs than a typical girl does. So say for example I start at the beginning of let's say this month. But next month I will start in the 2nd week of Feb, and the last week or few days going into March, with me starting again by the end of March, and once in April. Again, that is an example. That's why you wait. Because until you understand and learn about your body and sexual health, you don't know what you may encounter as opposed to other girls who aren't like you. That's how you get pregnant as oppose to other girls who didn't. Irregular periods they say are usually common during the preteen and teen years and settle by adulthood, but that didn't happen for me. That's how I am.

    • However, if you are not going to wait and you don't even know this much, really asking yourself should you be having sex, and I bet you bad enough this guy is not your boyfriend? You decide since your more and likely not waiting till marriage to have sex. Nobody can tell you how to live it, but I promise you if you sleep with him, not only may you not find a husband who doesn't like your sexual choices, the chances of getting legally married my be slimmer, but you run the risk of not just not having your virginity again, you run a higher risk of getting STDs. By you risking your virginity for an experience with this guy ALONE. Call me judgmental, call me religious, or a femcel, whatever. At least I have my education and understand what sex entitles. This isn't smart, but you do what you wish. Men like that say anything to get sex. Period.

  • I mean, he asked you if he should wear it, and you aaid yes, so if the message doesn't stick to him when you say that, you should not stay with him

    • what concerns me is that he might pull it off during sex or something if he doesn't like it. I guess I should talk to him about it

Most Helpful Guys

  • Risky. I had sex with a nineteen (19) year old girl who was a virgin, and I ruptured her hymen on the second or third meeting of penetrative sex. We had sex the first or second time, with me only in her with half the length of my penis (her hymen prevented any further penetration) I did not wear a condom, but was not stupid nor macho, and withdrew before I ejaculated and ejaculated on her upper thigh. This is also risky, since pre seminal fluid contains sperm cells. I don't believe the presence of a hymen, would prevent pregnancy.

    In any case, screwing without a condom is risky, ESPECIALLY with a macho man who thinks he can ejaculate in you and not risk pregnancy.

  • A condom has two purposes, to prevent pregnancy, and prevent STDs. Though you can get a STD while wearing a condom, the chances are greatly decreased if you are wearing one. Keep in mind, that the withdrawing method/pulling out method, is not a good form of birth control, as pregnancies often result from it. Also, some guys lie about pulling out, they say they will, but then don't. Also, a guy can get sperm in fluid that comes our of his penis, before intercourse. A guy can also miscalculate, and not withdrew soon enough, etc.

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What Girls & Guys Said

2 17
  • Stick to your guns... tell him no condom means no sex. You do not want to be a mommy yet or get an STI.

    The pull out method does NOT work. There is some precum on an erect penis and it can still get you pregnant even if he pulls out. Pulling out is hard for a guy because it is right in the middle of an orgasm.

    • is there still pleasure for a guy wearing a condom?

    • Of course. Guys still have great orgasms with condoms on.

  • In my opinion I would wait to make sure he’s truly a good guy and not just saying what you want to hear so he can take a virgins virginity away and then ditch you ( not to say he is that guy but, be aware). However, if you do decide to then yes, absolutely use protection. “Pulling out” is still risky like... very risky. If it comes down to him not pulling out and doesn’t have protection then take the morning after pill to prevent pregnancy if you do not desire it at the moment.

  • No, it's not normal at all. If you are going to be sexually active, you should be on contraception. Even if you are on contraception, you need to see a clean blood test for StDs before allowing sex without a condom.

    He sounds like he's too immature and irresponsible to be having sex.

    • thanks, he's 4 years older than me so I thought he'd be more mature about this

    • This is one way that age is just a number. There are responsible 16-year-olds and irresponsible 50-year-old.

  • I can control myself enough to pull out in time but don't forget you're not protected from potential std's without a condom.

  • Condoms are definitely sensation-killers and unpopular with guys. However, unless you are on some form of effective birth control and you KNOW that he doesn't have an STD, bare back rides are much more enjoyable. Ignore the bull about "pulling out in time": it is almost impossible for a guy to resist doing a "Thar she blows" when he pops his load. Insist on protection.

    • so would a guy not experience much pleasure with a condom on?

    • Nothing at all like riding bare-back. Most fit very tightly and thus dull the sensation. I've found that the expensive "loose fit" ones allow my rod to bang around inside the thing and thus generate a lot more feeling and sensations.

  • It's your body so you make the rules. If he doesn't respect that he needs to find a new girlfriend.

  • Yeah, I think deep down he wants to pull out without a condom, my opinion is to think this one over this sounds serious

  • I never use a condom and just ask them to pull out.

  • Yeah, many girls are actually cool with the pullout method. Heat of the moment things, or just no condoms available. Just it's not always reliable. At-least he acknowledged he should use a condom.

    • yeah he did acknowledge it but it concerned me that he later tried to convince me it would be ok without one

  • That’s dangerous

  • It’s a red flag on multiple levels. It also means he’s not concerned about having SAFE sex.

    • thanks for your reply. when you say on multiple levels, what do you mean?

    • As far as STDs and pregnancy.

  • I've done that.

  • That’s dangerous. If you let him talk you into that, you are going to be pregnant.
    That’s what some guys do.
    I on the other hand, have gotten a vasectomy, and get tested every year.
    I love having skin on skin the way nature intended, and no chance of getting pregnant.

  • People who use the pull out method are referred to later as "parents".

  • I don't wear condoms. If he wears one with you then why be upset. If he is sleeping with a ton of other girls without he should be tested frequently but that's about it

  • if both not comfortable using condoms then have sex on safe period.

    • what do you mean by safe period?

    • I meant natural birth control methods. that is includes calendar method.

  • Even though it’s not the safest thing, it’s pretty normal for a guy. In my experience, they typically don’t want to wear condoms and prefer to just pull out instead if the girl will let them. Be careful because he’ll likely pressure you to go bare.

  • You don't have to end it, just stick to your guns. No condom, no sex. It's not a "method" at all and there's no way I'd risk it. Even if he precums in you, even though chances are slim, that could get you pregnant even.

  • You need to be able to trust him so if you dont you should talk about it more and if that doesn't relieve your worry then break up with him