Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health Guys, would you prefer to know I was raped before marrying me?
Anonymous
Please be honest. I won’t judge. And if you do is there a reason why? Would you be mad finding out that I hid it after getting married? I honestly can’t hide it because I feel guilty because you deserve somebody better not someone who was used and violated.
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Updates:
+1 y
I’m sorry to hear what you went through it’s not easy... I don’t mind if he rejects me because if that, it’s better than to marry and him finding out afterwards and leave me
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What Girls & Guys Said
5 75First, there is nothing for you to feel guilty about. It's not your fault that you got raped. You were violated but you are still the same person now that you were before it happened.
Personally, if I was going to marry you I don't think I would want you to tell me. I wouldn't want you to think I was going to marry you out of sympathy.
Yes, I would like to know. Such information would actually strengthen the relationship. I need to know that as not to make dumb jokes around that topic. Such a status would not be a factor to me, but I sill would like to know it.
That’s a huge thing to leave out of your marriage. He should at least know if you have suffered severe trauma like that.
“I honestly can’t hide it because I feel guilty because you deserve somebody better not someone who was used and violated.”
Don’t talk about yourself like that. You’re gonna make wanna cry! 😭
I need to know that some things ai might do could trigger you.
If you were my girlfriend and you told me the truth I won't leave you, In fact I would love and appreciate you more :) It wasn't your fault :)
If you didn't tell me till after marriage id leave you on grounds that you are a liar and tricked me into marriage. Probably treat you like shit until you were out of my life too.
I am sorry that this happened to you and if I were dating you I wouldn't hold it against you either.
I don't know of a better person than one who thinks they are not good enough. It was not your fault what happened to you, so why blame yourself? But the fact that you would think someone deserves better just tells me that you care about them. That is the person I would want to be with, someone who really does care.
I would want to know before so it might help our relationship by me not saying things that would make you feel bad or trigger some emotion. If I did not know then I might say something to set you off unknowingly. I would not want to do that.
If a man rejects you because you got raped, that is not a real man, that is not the right man for you. I personally would want to hear it only if you wanted me to. I'd also appreciate you trusting me with that info. But I would not think badly of you. It wasn't your fault. I'd be pissed at the person that did it to you.
I think you are being very hard on yourself for something you had no control of. The reason I would want to know is how to handle what your thinking about what happened to you and how to make love to you without tripping bad memories shutting you down to sex again and to help you stop blaming your self for something you had no control over
I'd rather know than not know, but it wouldn't change my feelings.
Did I mention it's not your fault you were raped and it doesn't make you less of a person?
I would still marry you. Your trauma means you're human and need a man that secures you even that more. I would like to make sure that you're never hurt by another man again. I would appreciate you being honest. Any guy that judge's you for your past is a Coward and doesn't deserve to be your husband.
Any critical information is useful.
I want an honest person. If you are being after marriage I guess that will break my heart, but I will still respect your honesty and accept you as now me, and you are bonded by most divine bond "Marriage". So yes, I will be mad, but I had still start loving you as a warrior who survived rape and didn't kill herself, you are brave.
Wouldn't matter to me.
I would want to know such things but it wouldn't influence the marriage
It makes way to much since to let him know that so that way you 2 can talk it out and understand each other better. If he accepts it then he is the one but if he doesn’t then it’s his lost
Prob.
Yes I would want to know but only because it would give me a better understanding of you and your needs so I can be the best man that I can be for you. Like for instance knowing that you've been through that tell me I need to be little bit more patient with you and reassuring as well I'd hold you more so you'd know your safe in my arms. That would be your safe place. Understand