Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health Has feminism made attempting to talk to/date a woman harder for men?
Anonymous
First disclamer: I mean post-modern feminism, not 1960's-70's feminism. Second disclamer: I'm NOT posting this to HATE or belittle womens rights or equality so PLEASE I ask that you do the same and respect others opinions. I hope we can have a meaningful DISCUSSION about this and not an argument about how stupid someone or one side or whatever is. I ask this question because I as a male sometimes feel as though men in general have to walk through a minefield when talking to women, at least initially. Thats not to say I don't feel confident in my ability to talk to women or ask them out. As a man even though I know I am a good person and I know I'm not some horrible monster, I feel as if men are far far too often demonized by feminism and its inaccurate statistics about rape and such. Maybe this is just me but when I walk around the store I work in, I honestly get a little worried that if I happen to accidently bump into a woman the wrong way while trying to ween my way through customers, she could claim I touched her innapropriately and get me fired with little to no chance of being able to defend myself. IDKY but I feel like this carries over to initiating a conversation with a girl you find attractive, that they could see it as, why is this stranger talking to me? is he going to rape me? kinda deal. NOW that being said I don't know what women think lol. I just feel like I can't be the only one who has this feeling. I mean I'm sure I'm probably not even explaining this correctly and some people will take it the wrong way. what I'm trying to get at is, has feminism demonized men to the point where it has made it more difficult for guys to initiate conversation with a girl they find as a potential mate? (err I think thats what I'm getting at). I mean just take a second and really really think about it, the way the media seems to demonize men, men do this and that and this bad thing, has male shaming gone too far? (more to come in an update).
Updates:
+1 y
once again I know this sounds like another one of those "why feminism is bad" questions but I don't intend it that way. what I'm try to get at is I feel as a male that feminism makes me feel bad for rape even though I have and never will rape someone. that carries over to dating. What if she thinks I'm going to rape her or something? if she does and she tells someone, socially if not legally (?) I'm screwed. Once again I might not be explaining correctly what I'm trying to get at.
+1 y
Also YES I know that initiating conversation with someone you find attractive is nerve racking for anyone, and would make anyone nervous etc etc... I was just leaving that out because it seems like a given.
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What Girls & Guys Said
30 44Not really. But it has given women more of a voice in who they date.
have they not always had a voice in who they date?
Depends on what generation you are talking about.
Depends. The softy men are going to be too scared to talk to women, due to all the "trying to chat up women in public/hit on them is sexual harassment, etc" bullshit.
On the flip side, it's that much easier for guys with balls.
Absolutely.
It's not being jaded at all.
They're good ones out there but 99% of women don't take advantage of what women during the movement would die for. Women these days are more lost than ever.
... And I date a feminist.
Yes, it does. It criminalizes men making moves, but at the same time does nothing to encourage women to make moves.
I do not think so.
In a way yes, but it was this psycho feminist chick at my school who doesn't know what she is talking about, because she thinks that women have the ability to fight back so if you say you'd never hit a women then she says you're not a feminist (which I am). I called her a crazy nutbag, so she did the only reasonable thing. She kicked me right in the place you don't want to be kicked.
Men can't win. We are either sexist for not wanting to hit women, or we are sexist for being willing to hit a woman. There are too many different kinds of feminists all waving the same banner. If we listen to one group of feminists, another group of feminists acts like we are the enemies of all women for it. Feminism is NOT a single movement, and we need to stop pretending like it is. There are many different types of feminists, and no matter what men do, we will be seen as evil sexist pigs by another group. That is why you are a feminist, yet another type of feminist saw you as the enemy. This is also why so many guys that once embraced feminism no longer support it.
If a guy bumps into me I don't feel like he molested me though if he didn't apologize I'd be irritated. As for the feeling I could be raped thing, for me it's true but then again I'm a very paranoid person. I think I might be killed, stabbed, robbed, and anything else bad when I leave my house. Sometimes I get a feeling I'm pregnant and I freak out, I've never even had sex or anything close to that.
Considering 80% of rapes are commited by men, women do have a reason to be worried.
Easier to weed out the garbage... I love feminism in that aspect. Ladies are quick to say they are and I'm quick to run away.
To the 2 downvotes, should I be unhappy and accept a woman I don't like?
With what Modern Feminism has become (one woman below described it well in my opinion, as "Stuck up, jealous, hateful, bitter, lonely", and I would add looking for something to complain about), I would say yes.
Mostly because a woman can make any crazy accusation without evidence and at least a certain percentage of the population will take it serously.
Yes, to the point that MeToo is one way
I'd like to think of myself as a fairly chill person and while I believe that male shaming does occur, at times it's with good reason. I have personal experience with guys who treat girls like objects and if you're a guy and want to be friends, I will happily open up. However, if you're looking at me in a romantic light I will initially be guarded because experience has taught me to be. A lot of guys want me and other girls for our bodies. If you seem like a genuinely good guy I will open up pretty quickly though; it's just that so many guys say that they're good guys and end up being entitled idiots.
A lot of women want guys for their bodies too. But we don't shame them for it.
Most people are attracted to the (bodies) of the opposite sex and there is no shame in that.
I can get where she is coming from though... and well honestly I don't know if I'd say WE as a gender don't shame women on their bodies, with advertisement and such (we probably do, I know I try not to). then again the argument then arises that well women work in advertising as well etc etc etc. Also I do understand however the idea and such of physical attraction and there is nothing wrong with that, its a biological mechanism designed to help people choose a good mate.
Oh I didn't mean to imply that attraction to someone's body is wrong at all, it's natural behavior and girls are most definitely attracted to guys' bodies as well. I mean to say that some guys (and maybe girls too, I'm just speaking from personal experience) think that if they are attracted to a girl' body, they are entitled to get what they want. And then they proceed to get butthurt if you do not feel the same way, and sometimes end up spreading lies, rumors, etc. I bothers when guys treat girls like objects they are entitled to get. (And some girls could do this as well, idk) Being guarded initially is just a defense mechanism until we realize that you are a genuinely decent guy.
It is feminism, but not in a way most would think. Men used to speak however they wanted and expected women to go along with it. Not that women are realizing they should have equality and some of the things men say are hurtful or wrong, men feel like they need to tread carefully. Our society has been a patriarchal society for so many years, men aren't used to thinking about the effects. While there are some extremists (who are misandrists, no feminists), true feminism promotes true equality. You shouldn't have to be afraid of accidentally touching someone and them claiming harassment. If you bump into them and apologize but they still shout harassment, they're not feminists.
It is feminism and not in the way most would think - because it's worse. If you want to actually find out what feminism is really about go to avoiceformen. com and read some of the articles. Modern feminism has for quite some time been about 'victimhood' not women's rights but few women are savy enough to know it. They typically also try to speak for their entire sex as if they're all vulcans and never lie - which is ridiculous. There is no such thing as "The patriarchy" anymore than there is the bogeyman - particularly in a world where male homelessness, suicide, death and imprisonment are so monumentally and unjustifiably unequal there should be numerous campaigns against such injustice. True feminism is documented in the literature of the last 50 years and it is unquestionably man hating to it's core. Simply stating that "Not all feminists are like that" doesn't make it true - in fact it denies every news story of so called female "oppression" that currently liter the modern media.
It depends on what you say. If you start with the typical womanizing pick-up lines (such as those seen on How I Met Your Mother) then yes. Any self-respecting woman would not respond well to those. If you try to pick up a girl by commenting on her looks, even in a polite or kind way, an extreme feminist would probably say no, but unless you are being an absolute pig, you shouldn't have a problem.
Honestly, I think it has. I will never get involved with a woman who is a feminist. Most feminists these days just hate men.
Honestly, I'd assume that postmodern feminism would've made it EASIER, if anything. Women are encouraged to make the approach ourselves, not just wait. We're not told to avoid men because we have to be chaste and conversation could be misconstrued and ruin our reputations. If someone DOES attack us, he's held accountable -not us for having been near him -at least, those are the goals.
The "goals" as you put it however are entirely in your subjective opinion. When accusation is guilt based entirely on how you feel and a man's rights are second to your emotions there is no "Equality".
You don't get to say your rights are being treated as less important than my emotions when I can't walk freely on my own without getting harassed and the response is threats and violence if I try to change that. If every woman you meet thinks you're a probable potential rapist, what's more likely, that you're giving off some sort of vibe or that they're all crazy? I'm a rape survivor and I don't assume all men are likely potential rapists.
Yes, it has, and that's one of the goals.
To a degree, awhile ago we where above women simply by virtue of being a man, female attraction to men is mainly based on social hypergamy, so a lot of us could be desirable to women. Now along with reproductive principles (we can knock up multiple women a day, they can only get pregnant once in 9 months, eggs are less plentiful than sperm thus more valuable) the average guy isn't that desirable to most women, while any women who isn't completely ugly is desirable to most men, as women simply need to look half decent.
It's not feminism's fault. Girls don't want anything to do with me and guys continue to cockblock me. The longer I'm forced to stay a virgin and prevented from having sex with girls, the worse it's going to be for this planet and the multiverse. The world elite think they can shut me down. When they're begging for mercy next month, when they're begging for help, I won't show them mercy nor will I help them. I will watch them perish as the planet is engulfed in flames. You may not know who I am, humans, but you will soon enough.
No, it makes it easier. And more meaningful.