How do guys not get attached after sex?

Question

KimKardashiansFeet · Accepted Answer

Ok so based on the answers, other opinions and my own knowledge id say this:
the attachment after sex thing is a 50/50 thing in men and women and is most likely a gender based stereotype. However as some people might think, the reason most likely isn't cause ”mens brains go by logic, womens go by emotion” as that statement itself isn't entirely true. Although the majority of men go by logic and women otherwise, as since the attachment is 50/50 has to tell another story. Im guessing it has to do with either chemicals in the brain in which varies from person to person, emotional interest in the other person or the way the person gets attached and close to others through individual experience. Maybe it comes down to both being flawed, the girl not calling cause she is too shy to and the guy not calling for the same reason.

StarsInTheEyes · Accepted Answer

I think that some guys do get attached. I can't speak for all guys, since there are always exceptions, and I'm not a guy. I'm only speaking from my learning about psychology and from people's experiences.

I think that some guys do get attached to the girls/partners after sex, but that attachment is the desire for more future sex. It's the yearning and thirst for more sex.

They might say "I miss you," or even "love," and feel that they want to see the partners again and soon, want them close to them, but it's not really out of love, although some might think that if their partners had a nice sex with them, they provided love.

Ogopogo · Accepted Answer

We aren't supposed to not get attached. Sex causes our bodies to make love chemicals. That's far and away the main thing sex is for an its most important function. Not reproduction, not pleasure, but pair bonding. I still have feelings for every woman I ever slept with, and one or two I only ever kissed. I'm not haunted by these feelings, in fact I like them. It only hurts to love somebody if either you're obsessed with them or they hate you. Instead of denying yourself feelings, try allowing yourself as many as will fit. That's what your body wants, and the world needs a lot more of it.

integrale77 · Accepted Answer

This is just a generalisation and does not apply to all people.
This is down to differences in the male and female thought processes. male will apply logic to a decision and don't have to apply emotion to it. A female make a decision based on what she feels and generally this will involve an emotional tie to it.
So when it comes to sex the logical thought process can take over and we can see it as just a way to experience physical pleasure it just involves a second person... If one of the girls can give a perspective on what you feel about having sex please?

SteveSmith1985 · Answer

Guys can get attached after sex. It totally depends on the circumstances. But sex does not create an attachment. There has to be one there already. Sex can be meaningful or it can be meaningless. It depends entirely on the situation. But the guy should make pretty clear which one he considers it to be. You should make sure you're clear in that too.

LokiWhite · Answer

I get extremely attached. I don't understand the alternative.

Roxilicious · Answer

They do they just have to like you for whatever reason that may be but in my experience guys definitely aren’t rocks lol

VIVANT · Answer

If you are willing to have sex with people you do not like ~ you will not get attached. Men are more willing to do that.

If you want casual sex ~don’t bed a guy you like.

If you want a relationship~ don’t bed a guy who just wants sex🤷‍♀️

Wharvey98 · Answer

That’s actually a gender based stereotype. Statistics show that men are just as likely to become attached to a sexual partner as women. However men’s brains are hardwired differently, so it’s not impossible that we tend to express that attachment differently than women do.

yeneiri · Answer

Now it's all coming out that never ever trust guys that is asking you to have sex with them or asking something that involves lusts and will say that like you coz it's not their heart who speak. It's their dick who dictates their mind.😆😆💔

Pranoo1 · Answer

In a serious sexual engagement the man is the giver and the woman is the receiver. My guess is that the sense of intimate communication and fulfillment is probably more for the woman, which might explain why they differ in their outlook and their postsexual conduct.

Jayeldubya · Answer

Truth of the matter is, even though men don't quote on quote get attached during sex, too many partners does damage us psychologically. Same as women.

EpicDweeb · Answer

We do but it's more subtle. Guys quite literally feel emotions less than girls. Our bodies don't produce the all the same hormones in the same amounts. Basically the bonding hormones that are produced in a woman's body during sex are also produced in the man's body but to a lesser extent. So yeah guys DO get attached after sex but it's not just not as strong of an attachment.

Selina_Wayne · Answer

I wouldn't with someone I am not attracted to

Apple1996 · Answer

Some girls do this too

Secret6620 · Answer

Great question 😊💞

LeeLadDaBadLad · Answer

Because sometimes people just want a quick hook up both genders do it

PrincessGrail · Answer

They don't think/feel the same as we do. That being said, I've used guys for sex once or twice in my life, but I always felt bad about it afterward.

mystomachissick · Answer

Both sexes do this. My ex was doing this less than a month after she broke up with me. On the other hand, I've had sex with just two different people in my life and been deeply emotionally attached to both of them. It comes down to the person. I could never just have shallow, meaningless sex even though I'm a guy, and there are girls who do it with someone different each week.

Adam1978 · Answer

We learn from young age to control our feelings so if we go into sex as just as sex that is what we get out of it. But we can also allow ourselves to fall for the girl but we can't decide that it will happen. Or we can just act as we don't care if we haven't mastered our feelings yet. If we don't want it to go on.

InDetail · Answer

Even if she finishes in the best way possible, we dont assume things and to be honest just may not be as into someone.

This isn't everyone's reason and it's a bit messed up, but I used to just sleep around to be better for the one I want to be with and I'm a pretty chill and open dude, I won't ghost people and if they have the courage to ask I'll tell them.

sawno · Answer

Our body doesn't release as much bonding hormones during sex.

Dongtai · Answer

We’re not all wired the same. If I have sex with a woman I liked initially I’m hooked emotionally and physically.

Girls I don’t have feelings for? Well that might answer the question. But I don’t think that’s exclusive to gender. A lot of people have sex purely for physical pleasure. The emotional attraction was never there. So sex can’t amplify it.

BeMuse · Answer

Well regardless of how many times women repeat “men only want sex”, it takes a lot more to keep us interested. While women can be all in after sex (because they place so much value on sex by itself), men need a lot of other variables to line up to be emotionally attached (because we place value on a lot of other things). Those are the facts, but girls like to flip it and project how they deal with relationships onto men.

VaIiant · Answer

Women release a chemical that makes them attached to the person they had sex with for 30 days. Men release that same chemical, for 48 hours.
Thus, if you're screwing around with different guys before they already like you, they aren't going to like you afterwards.

brathwaitereginald74 · Answer

It's easier to deny your feelings initially for the person and move on or just think of it as a one night stand and nothing more than to give in to your feelings and get hurt in the process, men do have emotions but sometimes it betrays us when we let them be known to women; ( the fact is that women wants and their needs is two different things ). And women tend to put their wants above their needs while we take care of our needs before our wants.

TripleAce · Answer

Easy, most girls don't realize this -> we generally go for easy targets for sex... If she's a girl we would date, we would fall in love when we have sex, but we don't because we know already from the first 1 minute of seeing her physically that she's not the girl we want long term, for the most part... so we dump her in the sex pile...

its really as simple as that

Miristheiss · Answer

I do get attached. Before sex even happens though.

MecheD · Answer

A good portion of men see’s sex as sex. Because men know that anything is possible. (Cheating) so they don’t hold much weight to it. Technically everyone cheats either it’s happened already or it will later.

Ps I’m not saying we like being cheated on but the thought of the possibility NEVER leaves the mind.

JDavid25 · Answer

Everybody gets somewhat attach during sex, but I guess guys care more about gettin a nut out than the actual person.. They end up disregardin that attachment because they got what they came for (no lunch intended).. But a lot of guys do plainly get attached..

JohnAlaska43 · Answer

Guys like the feeling of sex and will get it every chance they can get.

Ámayas_20 · Answer

I'm not a guy but sex doesn't make me feel different about a person.

SergeantSmoke · Answer

I know! It's super confusing to me... If I EVER lost my Virginity to a Girl... I'd still be attached to Her!

Sharkiefoo · Answer

I get very attached, I'd say some girls don't either from my experience

Skipperben11 · Answer

Some do, but not all. I certainly don't.

MrGrey240 · Answer

Guys do dispute common theory. After time and multiple sessions.

Passinggas · Answer

I am a sucker, I get attached to my ons that only wanted a quick one. I still think of one I met in passing wondering what her name is and where she might be today.

GuidoThePizzaMaker · Answer

People need to stop having sex out of wedlock

bellybuttonlint · Answer

I think biologically speaking, it's our job to mate with as many women as possible. Getting attached would prevent us from doing that. Though if I like a girl I get attached before sex.

Kazzza · Answer

Emotionless I guess

demonics · Answer

How do women not feel bad for leading men on or using them?  Same same. Biology.

Browneye57 · Answer

They do. Unless they're cold, dead, or heartless.

winterfox10 · Answer

Some guys just logic themselves out of developing feelings.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

Some men do and some men do not. Equally, some women do amd some women do not. Me, I do not. I do not fall in love through my penis.

6lacier · Answer

I think guys do get more attached after sex. Maybe men's sex drive is more decoupled from whether they are interested in a committed relationship with someone. I have had sex with women because I was horny, where after the horniness subsided, I knew absolutely that I didn't want a relationship with this person. Sometimes it's less clear-cut. I have grown attached to girlfriends where deep down I probably knew she wasn't the one, but there was a lot to like about her, and the bond that developed with regular intimacy probably made it harder to break up than if the relationship had been purely platonic.

es20490446e · Answer

Let tell me you a secret: They are "fucked up"

AynonOMouse · Answer

People should be attached before having sex with someone. Only messed up people can have sex with someone they aren't attached to.

VikingWarLord · Answer

Because we need our variety. I love having sex with so many different types of women. I couldn't be tied down to just one.

I'm young, tall, dominant, have a huge cock and women love me. No fucckin way I'd settle for just ONE!

Cybernizer · Answer

The ones who do not get attached after sex are usually players, they have had so much sex that it becomes just another habit. They are desensitized to relationships.

UglyestGuyEver · Answer

its the same as masturbating, u dont fall in love with the guy u see on screen after u masturbate to him do u?
its strictly for pleasure... same thing for guys when we fuck a girl... we jus use her as a toy we can get plesure from... a real life living human toy..

genericname85 · Answer

well maybe by the sex being bad xD

jessicarosen · Answer

They just want to cum.. once they cum it's over. No further feelings.

aaronbw · Answer

Not completely true. Lots of men get attached afterwards, thinking it might be something more than what it is.

First time I ever had sex I thought for sure that meant she wanted more than that; nope... I was just a means for her to get off and wound up on the curbside lol.

ThatDude29 · Answer

Well here is one guy that cannot. I'd much prefer the dates, long walks, activities, romance, flirting and then have emotions and feelings before sleeping with a girl. Some guys can, good for them, but i know i CAN"T. :)

mattia93 · Answer

It depends if the guy really likes the girl or if it was just a game!! Anyway I do get attached, we're not all the same

Thatsamazing · Answer

What do you mean "how?" We just... do. There's no how to it.

loveslongnails · Answer

Because... "love" or even "a whole lot of like" is not a prerequisite for enjoying the physical pleasures of sex, if you're most guys. It's really THAT simple.

Rangers · Answer

I did get attached, and it lead to a world of pain for me. It's mostly because she was my first and only at the time, plus we had many deep conversations that I'd never had with anyone before. She's also still the only girl I've ever kissed. With the two other girls I've since had sex with, I didn't share much with either of them and it was clear all around that it was just sex and nothing more, plus, they weren't as nice and we didn't kiss at all.

cutenhot · Answer

Some DO, Some Dont.

DigBickBrad · Answer

For women it's an emotional mothering family nesting thing, and men it's a physical necessity

Samantha_17 · Answer

Who is saying that? My man got attached to me big time :)

verylovelyguy · Answer

tough to answer. i only had paid sex

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Because some of them don't want to be attached. It's all in the mindset of the person you're with. If you go into it thinking you're going to change their mind, well, I've got 4 words for you: Good Luck With That.

How do guys not get attached after sex?

Most Helpful Girls

Most Helpful Guys

What Girls & Guys Said

Related Questions