You are girlfriend material, and not hook up material. The mere fact that you're so concerned makes you girlfriend material. Also, there's nothing wrong with begin a virgin if you don't want to have sex with someone right now. I am 22 and I have made the decision to remain a virgin until now and I am very happy about it.
Ok, first of all I want to get one thing straight with you. You need to understand that there is a clear line to separate sex and love. Ok, sex and love are 2 completely different concepts - HOWEVER, we find that sometimes they intertwine but that is not to get them confused as one in the same.
You seem like the kind of girl who prefer 'love' instead of 'sex'. For that, I would say you need to understand that love doesn't have to involve sex straight away, and that if a guy loves you he will wait on you and not force you to have sex with him/or do anything of sexual nature. Sex is just an extra benefit that comes into the relationship later on. I always say it's best to get to know the guy for a few months before deciding to sleep with him - and it's true cause I've saved myself from sleeping with a lot of douchebags this way.
I also want to highlight that you do not owe anybody an explanation about your past. Honestly, it seems like you haven't done anything. Baby girl, I hate to break it to you, but we all sext here and there lol. If this is something you're uncomfortable doing then you shouldn't do it, period. Do what makes you happy ONLY and don't EVER let anybody pressure you into doing something. However, you do not need to tell anyone about your past, this is something personal.
Whenever I meet a guy and he asks me about my past I say "I don't feel comfortable having this conversation cause it's private, but you need to know I am a good woman."0 0 0 1
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I just read this quickly, but just some general things, learn from all these experiences and notice these "signs". Example a guy pressuring you for sex or sexual things when you're not ready, isn't interested in you for a relationship (a guy that is won't keep pressuring you when you're not ready). Your sexual history is nobody's business but yours. Try different types of guys. Don't reach out to "old friends" as a rebound. And lastly, like I say, different guys (we're all different) and it'll take time to find the one that's looking, especially in today's world it seems. Honestly, believe it or not, I'm having just as much of a hard time finding a woman that wants anything serious as well. It seems very few are actually looking for that today, but even worse I assume for younger like you. But also when you meet someone new, don't be afraid to ask them directly right away what he's looking for and tell him what you want as well. You're not going to "scare him off". Those that run off because of that aren't looking, and you've saved yourself a lot of time (and pain) finding that out early.
0 0 0 0Your sexual history is your business alone. You have no reason to feel like a slut. You are perfectly normal. Decent guys don't ask a lady about those kinds of things. Decent guys don't care about your past. Instead of discussing sex, talk about things that interest you. Get to know guys by asking questions about themselves such as their interests, school, work, sports, food, where they see themselves in five years, etc. They should ask you similar things. If all they want to discuss is sex they aren't good boyfriend material.
0 0 0 1I grew up in a moderate tradition indo Caribbean household. Since I'm also Hindu, my virginity is not only my business but my family's pride. I feel like a slut because I don't know how to recover from what happened. It is believed when a girl loses her virginity to a guy then she is his and no longer can marry. When it came to my ex, it was hard to get him to understand and how hard the effect of doing so can have on me social in my family and friends. With how he portrayed me to my family I no longer feel I have the right to stand my ground anymore. I made this post because I want to move forward and do better on my own terms.
That's why I slowly gave in to his manipulative ways because I thought submitting to him would prove how I felt.
I am Mentally trying to recover and get on my feet again but I want to learn what and what not to do.
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0 8Ummm... Your "sexual history" is nothing, girl. You got groped, made out, sexted, and had "virtual sex". You're still even a virgin. Just don't tell the guys that you meet about the groping and all that stuff: They don't have to know, and it's truly not important. Any guy you meet probably did more than that. Try not to rush things with any guy, because guys will try all sorts of tricks to get your precious virginity and then leave, so you'll have to filter the good ones
0 0 0 0The best way to stop being hookup material, is to not put out. Simple as that. You get to dictate when you have sex, and with who. Don't sleep with someone until you get a good feel for them, and know that they actually want to build a relationship with you.
1 0 0 0True and it very much feeds into self respect. A lot of guys and girls get stuck being hookup material simply because they don't respect themselves enough to not be.
Well I can't think of much, it looks your heart is in the right place. The hookup part it seems your way of getting over your boyfriend's so I would suggest that you find someone to share your problems and take a break. Jumping from relationship to another relationship isn't the solution so choose what you really want to do and spend some time alone. And with boys deep down there is a hunger of sex eventually so your history makes them feel that you enjoy it already and take advantage of the same. You are girlfriend material I feel but just got into poor choices.
0 0 0 0you can't stop it. women are too stupid and have awful instincts. since you have the freedom to choose you will only choose the fuckboy who makes the area between your legs wet. once you're in your mid 30's you'll be asking for the good guy who finishes last to get married and lock him down through a government contract. but that guy has more options now and can easily go for the new generations of fresh young sluts.
0 0 1 0Well, I made this post because I want to change and yes even I think I'm a slut. I can't find the grip to live with myself. I want better and I'm young enough to do so. I'm only 20.
Also, I'm learning how to be okay with my feminine side and embrace the old fashion part of myself without being ashamed no more. Feminism is shit.
Most girls your age are looking for friends with benefits.
If you put a profile out there, let them know you don’t hookup and want a relationship0 0 0 0Why do you reveal your sexual history to someone anyway?
No one has a right to know it as long as you feel free and okay to share it. I think this is your biggest mistake.
And that guy was a bastard. Both sides made mistakes but he was a coward.
İt is not for me to say what you should do with your life but just try keep things to yourself and open a new page when you meet a new person.
First, get to know him. Learn about personality.
See if you can trust him with your past if you want to be open about it.
Don't rush anything. Let it take its natural course.
Never have sexual intercourse because a man wants but do it because you both want.0 0 0 1they demand it.
You have every right to deny that request and they HAVE TO respect your decision
so the only way for me to move forward is to lie?
Because so many girls r not girlfriend material it’s hard to prove yourself. Basically just waste no time with the dogs, don’t b afraid to just stop talkn to em and move on
0 0 0 0I would avoid telling guys that you have sexted before. Instead you should tell them that you are a virgin waiting for marriage and it is non-negotiable. That should ward off the guys only interested in hooking up. Later on you can tell any guys that stick around about your masturbating habits.
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