Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health My boyfriend of a few months has said he wants to experiment with guys.
How do you handle something like this?
How do you handle your boyfriend wanting to experiment with guys?
Anonymous
Updates:
+1 y
I just wanted to thank everyone for the comments and feedback - I didn't realise it would get this response! As of now he is ignoring me as I said we were rushing things a bit... but with trust and open discussions I'm happy to give a go, or if he prefers, he take a break and experiment without me. I'm keeping my fingers crossed...
+1 y
Also to add a little more... it did come up early in our relationship in a "it would be hot if you were dominant and told me to go suck a guy" kind of way in that he was doing it for me. It just built and built until we got to the point where he had a profile chatting to guys and was looking to meet to see if he even liked kissing a guy or more.
+1 y
Just to update we broke up as he emotionally shut off when I asked to go a bit slower with this. Back in contact but on shaky ground.
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What Girls & Guys Said
103 290Get a strap on put your hair up And tell him... O. o
There's a chance he could decide he likes guys more and ruin your relationship. But only you know the bond you two have.
I guess it depends on how you feel about his experimenting more so than him actually doing it. There are things you can do with him too that can simulate things he might want to try. I’m not going to name them here because I don’t know if that’s allowed on this site or not.
I would have a long conversation with him about it. If he wants to experiment and you're honestly okay with an open relationship then I don't see a problem. I would also consider breaking it off since he appears to want to do some soul-searching of some kind or at least may not be ready to settle down into a monogamous relationship.
I wouldn't.
This sounds like him enjoying a lifestyle of risky sexual behavior, putting your health at risk, while you receive none of the benefits. He can call it experimentation all he wants but in the context of your relationship it is still cheating on you. With or without your permission. It seems to me, that you should both see other men.
It's only really cheating if he went behind my back. He wouldn't do that. And if I do go ahead with this I will insist on safe sex.
Oh hell naw 😂, i would leave
I think you should take both your feelings into account. Are you both into such a relationship? Sometimes these relationships work out quite well - if ALL parties involved are into that sort of thing. However, I must also warn you that people have ended up getting hurt or jealous in such relationships. If you don't like it, you must inform him of that BEFORE it gets too out of hand. If he doesn't like it, you must respect his feelings and back off.
Well your boyfriend is bi. Even if he says his not, its a simple yes or no when it comes down to it. Straight guys don't experiment.
Its up too you how you feel about that and what action if any you proceed with.
From your words it sounds like his want to experiment has been there for some time. The big question is how are you with that as an intrusion or lack of trust in your relationship. If it does it for you more power to you. If it freaks you out cut all contact, tell him swiftly, firmly, even bluntly but definitely in person! Why? so you can look him in the eye as you do. His reaction to the news no doubt will reassure you as absolutely right decision. The very least he will learn from loosing you as to consequences of such behaviour.
It would be a deal breaker for me. We would definitely break up.
I'd be perfectly OK if my boyfriend wanted to experiment with guys. As long as he's not messing around with swingers or other women I'm good.
Thank you - can I ask why you'd be ok with it?
The vendor next to your restaurant to the right is selling hotdogs. The restaurant to your left is selling tacos. You sell tacos as well. Now think of it this way; you wouldn't be mad if a loyal customer to you went and bought a hot dog from the vendor on the right, because you don't sell hotdogs, you sell tacos. But if a loyal customer goes to the left and buys tacos from someone else instead of YOUR tacos you would be mad. Same thing. I don't sell hotdogs, so it's OK if he goes out and gets a hotdog. But I sell tacos so it's NOT OK if he goes out and gets someone else's tacos.
Thank you so much - this makes so much sense!!!
No problem! :)
He could still leave you for a guy🤷♀️
Pretty sure he's not going anywhere but thanks for the concern 👍
I’m just saying, you wouldn’t want him doing it with a girl why? He could still leave you for a guy
I'd rather him leave me for a man than another woman. I wouldn't be insecure if he did it with a guy or dumped me for a guy but if he did it with another woman or dumped me for another woman I'll always wonder why I, as a woman, wasn't good enough and what SHE had that I didn't.
What about what the guy had
The guy has a penis. I don't have one of those. It's all good.
But what if he had qualities u didn’t u wouldn’t get mad?
No I wouldn't. Can you literally leave me be? I said I'd be fine if my guy wanted to try something new and you're out here "what if he LEFT YOU?". There are no "what-ifs". At the end of the day if he wants to experiment with men he CAN and I've made that very clear to him because quite honestly I find that HOT.
Oh ew
I don't think you have any right to be saying "ew" to anything when you're a 15 year old who's handle is "thottiana" lmao
LOL!
@FaustsFaun Nice example about the tacos and hotdogs
Ok break it off and let him do what you wants if you want to wait for him then I guess so? or just move on
Gross
Aren’t you a transgender?
I'm bi and my wife is too. So we handle it well.
do you both meet other people?
We do it together. You both have to agree on things or it won't work. I don't ever do anything with our her n the same goes for her we are both there
@Asker. I agree with @Wally1980. My mans not bi like me but we still meet other couples together. Takes a lot of communication, no judgements, and you both have to be on board. But because we can be so open there's no jealousy and complete trust. Love comes in so many kinds of packages. Some would say that we can't truly love each other if we have sex with others. But many couples do.
@PinkMichae your so right for sure
I’m out. Not for me
I'm sorry but if he wants to experiment with guys HE IS BI OR GAY! If you feel you can't handle that then you NEED to move on asap!
It doesn't matter what we do, what do you feel like?
Personally, I would pay good money for a front row seat to see my gorgeous man with another gorgeous man.
Your update changes a lot of things. He is bisexual and was repressed possibly. Have a serious talk with him, see what he actually wants.
What if he does it for free for you?😂😝
Put on a strap and get him on his knees😂.
No honestly best thing is to look what you think about it and maybe experiment together with him.
because if you don't he might eventually experiment with out telling you which makes it not experimenting but cheating instead which you most likely would not want.
Let him go and do that, at least he's being honest but I'd let him do it