Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health How long should you wait to have sex so that a guy won’t use you or consider you easy?
Sweetnessxoxo Explorer
should it be after dating for 5 months?
Updates:
+1 y
It’s scary because I don’t want to seem easy but i also don’t want to lose anyone
+1 y
There are a lot of great answers on here thank you everyone
2 8
What Girls & Guys Said
31 895mos? I'm doing good if I stay with someone after 5 dates with them holding out and being stingy.
Basically you shouldn't even think about it. You should just be together, and then down the road it will happen, because a guy that Doesn't want to be with you will not stick around like that.
You shouldn't have lose anyone over sex. The subject shouldn't even come up. You were saying yourself that you didn't even want to. You just wanted to focus on a relationship, as you should. If you feel you need to have sex with this guy in order to hold on to him, then you should not be in a relationship. If he's trying to talk you into it, then he isn't the guy for you. You aren't a prostitute. You're a woman and should be respected.
That is true i was just curious this question doesn’t mean that i would have sex with him
5 months? That's more than 5x too long for me. That's if I cared about the girl enough aswell.
Waiting long is not a factor that affects it..
How great are you at communicating and how compatible are you two.. Matters..
Funny thing here is.. Girls enjoy being used..
I doubt that most girls do I definitely wouldn’t want me or anyone to get used that is sad
I know... That's just a side note.. I forgot to mention
If you don't make a move in a couple of months they probabily start aiming that way i. e. Netflix and chill, etc
My experience was around the 3 month mark, she invited me over while her parents were at work and cooked for me... it was great
Then we ended up upstairs after talk of burning off calories (I honestly expected to go for a walk, yes really)... she said most guys wouldn't have cared about the food knowing what dessert was and hat getting me into bed had been harder than her A-levels
Most guys nowadays can’t go 2 months without sex when dating. Otherwise they will find you boring or think you are a prude. People are extremely promiscuous nowadays.
If it was someone single and free to date, anything longer than 3 days would worry me (as in, they have some trauma or shame - there really is nothing wrong with sex on any timing - it's a matter of how you feel)
@soleil2666 Well it is not The Same for women... a psychologically healthy women still has A lot to adjust to physically. If she has never had sex there can be a lot of pain and three. 3 Days is way too soon. It doesn’t provide time for things to open up naturally she can rip. Also taking time to trust a person isn’t Bc of “trauma” lol it’s normal. It’s great that you don’t shame women for enjoying sex... but you kind of go to other extreme.. To believe that for a virgin who has never dated before should have sex in Three dats or she has “ issues”.. well honestly that is very silly. I think you should stick to experiences women. I don’t mean this to be snide. A virgin will feel very unfairly pressured and you will feel very frustrated.
@VIVANT No, it's not that simple. And I am consolidating my own thought on it through those discussions. Men don't bond through sex the same way women seem to. If a male cares he cares and won't rush things - it's more that a female that is sexually ready but engineering the postponing is an unnecessary frustration. Providing she feels like waiting (with the social pressure removed) - these are the best times and the best feelings (or a relationship developing). Virgins are yet another case, it takes a lot of love of cuddling to feel safe and wanted - and even then I know it as a thing that takes time to discover.
*thoughts* and *of a relationship developing*
@soleil2666 Yes ok now I get where you were coming from. I don’t disagree.
@soleil2666 Guys tend to lose interest in a woman if she refuses sex. Because nowadays men are accustomed to sex during dating. All of their prior exes offered sex. So they feel its impossible to date someone without sex. Its kinda similar to your spouse being dead so now you feel like you can't live on your own anymore. You feel your life is meaningless since you were so attached to your spouse. Unless a guy is ultra traditional and conservative, its unlikely that he would date a woman for years without sex. He knows he can get a better more fulfilling relationship elsewhere. Folks are promiscuous nowadays with all the friends with benefits, hookups and shit. You don't want your boyfriend cheating. Men's sexual urges are way stronger than womens'.
@nelly83 I think it's more of a 'you don't refuse sex' as a guy. It's odd to police it - she gets offended, or thinks you don't like her, if you were to refuse it. At least as far as decent men out there go. That the world is full of oversexualised boys - it certainly is. I think it always was, but at this point they self-assign the 'cool guys' status as well, so it is easy for an unsuspecting soul to fall for that as the chief game in town/just the way things are. More or less - I don't feel like thinking now - it's sunny outside in Montenegro where I am, the sea is 150m away, I want to go see something pretty while still here 😀
@soleil2666 I feel like withholding sex is what women in that 2000s did. Not so much in 2010s. Back then it was fairly common and accepted in society for men to fool women into believing that they loved them. But when it in fact he's just saying all those things to get sex from her. So this question is really not a surprise.
Wait as long as possible could be 6 months, 4 months certainly worth the wait when you're young. Just check that while you wait he isn't being unfaithful to you. Mature people who have had multiple dating experience will have sex possibly within a month or few weeks.
Get to know the guy very well before jumping into anything and make sure he’s genuine and that both of u are on the same page...
I say at least 3 months of dating before sex.
Usually after 3 dates maybe
A few months. If he can't wait, he's not the one.
I'd say 3 to 6 months, but it really depends on how much time you are spending together. If you spend time together (like a couple days straight here and there, not just dates for a few hours) and get to know each other well and have things in common you both enjoy doing together besides just sexual stuff, and you both seem to want a similar/compatible future life, then it would be time.
What happened, did you sleep with someone and they left?
No never
Good. :) Hopefully things go well for you then.
You make a guy wait that long you better be engaged soon. You might as well wait till marriage now. Really not being mean
Not sure but I always resist the urge to do it with him for awhile
As long as it's not in the first 1-2 dates, it's all good.
5 months is pretty long but thats still fine. There was saying that, if you wait sex long like that or even more, there would be more trust built in the relationship, but that entirely depends on the guy you're seeing and if he's willing to commit for that patience
Only do it if and when you feel ready, don't let fear of losing someone pressure you to do it. by the way, doing that will MAKE him use you for sex, if anything.
i would say like 2 / 3 weeks in good timing
At your age I would say at least 1 year.
More than a few weeks is a deal breaker.