Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
How would you feel if your partner used intimacy as a way to control you?
Jean-Marie_Céline Master
Updates:
+1 y
Let's make it clear. Using intimacy as a way to control you is meant as an abuse tactic. Either they use sex as a bargaining chip, or use some sexual activities that you dislike or find unsettling and painful as punishment.
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What Girls & Guys Said
36 101I wouldn't like that
I'd feel like I'm in a relationship with a child.
I been there. i was just to young and stupid to know what it meant and now I would not stand for it. There would be no nothing if that the case.
if i can recall it suppose to be a time for two to combine and and enjoy each other and keep the stress on the other side of the door. but i could be wrong.
Like I'm being abused.
I won't stay with a controlling or manipulating partner.
I certainly wouldn’t stay with this partner
She'd better be good at. Because I don't care enough about sex to let it make decision for me.
No!!!
I'd dump him
A girl I have been 4 years together said to me "You're just with me together because of sex." It hurt me, because I thought this relationship is deeper and she destroyed my illusions in this second.
Few months after our relationship was over she approached me and offered sex without any other obligations.
I guess she was the one who just have seen our relationship only as sexual one. She gave me affection only in bed room, outside I was just a presentable asset. However she was my first love and I interpreted things in this relationship which didn't exist.
I would feel that it was time to find a new partner.
I’d ask what she would like Mr. Slave to do. I’m ready to cook, clean the house, and prepare our chamber for the night’s activities. Will Mr. Slave be in this scene or do you want him to watch.
I do not like others to attempt to control me.
I would dump her and find someone that wants me the same way I want her , using sex as a weapon isn’t good , that’s a toxic trait it means that partner only likes the convenience of you , I was with a girl that pulled that shit to end up finding out she was cheating on me , so dump her ass and move on
It would make me feel like shit, and truly piss me off at that person , I would probably more and likely break up.
Attacked
I'd feel free and unburdened, cuz they would be hella single. Miss me with that bullshit.
Need to explain a bit more about the word 'control' you have mentioned here. Based on that either it could be a good or a bad thing 🤷🏻♂️
Control as in - they won't give sex if you don't do what they want. Or if you do what they want, they'll spare you some sexual activities that are painful or you don't like. Anyway, is meant as an actual abuse tactic.
I’ll leave
The one and only time a girlfriend tried using it as a form of punishment or control I literally walked out her front door. Still, remember the scenario. We were chilling at her place and she asked me about something. Don't even remember what it was, but I playfully said I wasn't going to tell her. It was an unimportant, non-serious topic. So I did it just because I wanted to tease her. Apparently she took that more seriously.
An hour later I went to give her a kiss and she turned away, when I said,
Me: "what's the matter?"
Her: "You wouldn't tell me about X thing earlier"
Me: ... are you serious?
Her: Yes (communicating she's not going to kiss me because I didn't tell her earlier)
Me: *puts on jacket, walks out the door* "Have a good night"
At that time we always embraced before leaving/upon meeting. So she was very aware of the situation the moment she did that. She also apologized to me via text within the hour. That is simply trash behavior I have never and will not put up with. It's one thing to be mad and while mad just not being in the mood for intimacy. It's another to withhold love from a partner because you want them to bend to your will. That's some manipulative shit.
The girl is married with child now. Nothing against her as a person and I'm sure she's grown since then, just like I have. But yeeeea. Nope.