Husband likes to watch reddit nudes of different countries, like when we traveled to India, he searched it up and went to vietnam he does the same?

[Anonymous]

Hi, I’m [F/26] writing this to have a better understanding of why guys like to do this and have a different perspective so I can be okay with it. We’ve been together for over 3 years and recently got married. Husband [M/27] likes to watch nudes on reddit, and honestly it bothers me. When I asked him about it, he told me an analogy: “When you eat the same salmon everyday, wouldn’t you want to eat something else?” I told him I felt hurt about it and he told me that I shouldn’t get offended and take it to heart. He said that he likes to watch it and look at variety of bodies when he’s bored and to turn him on and he does this a couple times a week. And tell me if I’m crazy and insecure (he’s called me that so many times) but the categories he watches: barelylegalteens, latinas, ahegao, indians, Asians, there so much more etc really bothers me. It’s almost as if he talks to a girl or when we watch a movie, and when we were traveling to different countries he goes and look for those categories. And for me, it made sense why when he sees me bending down or see parts of my body—he doesn’t seem excited or turned on and I almost feel like a doll for him to fuck when he’s really horny. I understand it’s normal as my husband had told me so many times, but I’m just not okay with it and I feel like my body is useless. Please advise on how I can change my perspective on this. Thank you.

[SueShe]

What your husband does is emotional cheating and nothing less. It is not okay and you should never accept it or consent to him watching nudes. It will become a habit and sooner or later an addiction. You are the one that will pay for it because rather than bringing him closer to you, his addiction will move him away because he always will want more.

If you approve of him watching nudes, he will automatically understand that he may also start watching porn. You mention something like "barelylegalteens". There is a very fine line between barely legal and minors, thus making his addiction not only a potential criminal act but involving you too if this "barely legal" becomes "under age" because you did not say anything or intervene.

You need to set very strict rules and tell him that he may face consequences if he does not stop cheating on you.

[Anonymous]

He knows it makes you this accept but still does it? And what's worse, doesn't make any effort to make you feel desired? That's mad disrespectful in my opinion, and like the other person said, that's borderline cheating.

Anyway, he left the door wide open for you to do the same and search for nudes of other men, since he said that type of thing is meaningless... But if I were you, I'd leave his ass unless he stops.

[Opinion Owner]

And no, you shouldn't make yourself "be okay" with that type of behavior, there's nothing wrong with standing up for yourself

[Opinion Owner]

Sorry I meant upset* not accept

[Finchie40]

Your husband is selfish and disrespectful and this is something you should really reconsider on whether you want to continue a marriage with him or not. You sadly aren’t his priority , you are just a convenience to him , if you were his priority? he wouldn’t be doing what he is doing
To you. How would your husband feel if you were doing this sort of thing to him? Never waste your time investing into someone that isn’t investing their time into you. Life is too short to be with someone that treats you like a convenience , find yourself someone that makes you a priority

[KostasKouvalis]

I do that too, to be honest. I'm naturally a very curious person and I think it's natural for men to be curious about other women's bodies. He seems really comfortable with you, if he's doing that in front of you. Now, if he's not getting turned on from YOU, and is getting urges to sleep with other women, that's another issue.

[SomothErgai]

s this something he did before you got married? is it something he did when you first got together? I'm guessing it's something he has always done and you never had a discussion about whether or not you were ok with it. you can't just take something someone has been doing for forever and just up and decide it's not ok anymore.

If it was something that really bothered you all that much you should have had a talk about it a long time ago. and the talk should have looked something like this.

you: hey boyfriend, I don't like that you look at porn
Boyfriend: well I like looking at porn so i'm not going to stop
you: well if you don't stop I'm not going to be happy
Boyfriend: I'm sorry but this is something I enjoy and it's not something i'm going to stop doing. so you can either accept this part of me or move on to another partner

And then you either accept it and let it go, or you find someone else

OR it could have gone like this.

you: hey boyfriend, I don't like that you look at porn
Boyfriend: well I like looking at porn so i'm not going to stop
you: well if you don't stop I'm not going to be happy
Boyfriend: I accept your boundary and I will stop doing this activity

And then you have no issue. Ether way the issue has been addressed and resolved. Coming out of nowhere especially after you let it get to the point of marriage is frankly too late. When you married the man you made a vow and a promise that you accept and love him as he is. Porn habits and all. It simply is not fair to try and make him change now.

[molonski2]

He is correct , it get boring and of course he wants to view some of these stunning women , especially when he compares what he can get in Vietnam , the guys only 27 , perfectly natural , every guy is going to do that.

[Asker]

So why don’t just be single? Why be married? If he’s just only going to get bored with 1 salmon that he has to eat everyday?

[molonski2]

No because on some occasions he will eat beef , chicken , and other fish.. He is a young guy travelling , he's just being honest.

[DrPepper12]

This is abnormal and needs to be discussed.

[Asker]

We did discuss it he said: “I can do whatever I want it’s my life.”

[DrPepper12]

No it's OUR life. Would he go to counseling?

[Asker]

He said it’s a waste of money, I’ve suggested a few times to go to a marriage counseling together.

[DrPepper12]

Is there an ex of his or a relative that you can talk to about this?

[Iron_Man]

Tell him not to do that

[Peridot25]

I say do the same and look at nudes of men. Your husband won’t care. If he says anything, then throw his words back at him.

[Asker]

Yeah he doesn’t care. I just really hate that he’s compared me to a salmon that he gets tired of eating everyday and would want something else to eat, even though it’s only an analogy.

[Peridot25]

Make him feel the same way.

[abc--123]

Men like variety

[Bklynbadboy12]

He's an asshole dump him

[Anonymous]

Fuck him and his bullshit excuses...

He disrespected you enough. Tell him to go and fck his hand.

No one deserves this kind of treatment. Take revenge on him by divorcing.

[Anonymous]

Where do they have nudes of different countries? I'd like to see that myself.