Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health When I have sex with my girlfriend, I feel like I am having sex with all the guys she had sex with in the past.
- all diseases of other guys
-all saliva of other guys
-all hormones of other guys.
She told me she had 3 guys in her life and I am her 4th, but I know women tend to hide their past partners.
I don't know what to do, I don't enjoy sex with her anymore, and I can't even tell her that I'm losing interest in her because of her past.
Also, I'm slowly losing respect for her too.
I can no longer continue this, i just can't get over her past.
I can't get over her past, is it time to break up?
Anonymous
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What Girls & Guys Said
84 104Talk to her. Everyone has a past, let bygones bee bygones and if you tell her maybe she can make u feel special again.
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Lol I hope you realize that most girls above 25 are going to be shooting like 15+ sex partners lol
So it’s ok for a man to do so but if a woman does it she a slut?
I don’t think it’s a gendered principle; it’s a personal preference.
Yea but did he do what she did then it be hypocritical.
Yeah, it would be, but maybe think about that he didn't
Then let her move on.
Ya because being a slut is easy and being a stud is hard.
It’s not hypocritical if it wasn’t a principle he was asserting, it was an idea and feeling that he can’t get past. Not that it matters even if he was being hypocritical.
@yourmad101338 with that logic, every guy who isn't a stud is a slut because they would jump at the opportunity of getting sex -> loose.
@lumos Not that I necessarily agree with the original notion but I'm just going to point out that's not what follows from that logic. Remember that difficulty is being factored in, so because of their starting position as as guys, it would mean that guys who are not studs are simply not studs. It's not 'jumping at that opportunity' that defines the concept of slut, it's jumping at that opportunity when it's easy and readily available. Thus it would follow that being a stud is when you achieve frequent success when it wasn't easy, or in a sense when *you made it easy and readily available through your own efforts despite an uphill battle.*
@AllThatSweetJazz nah. They would sleep with everyone if they got the chance. Just because they don't have the opportunity to be sluts, it doesn't mean they're not slutty. To me (although I find it to be a very pointless word that I don't even agree with) slutty means being easy. And if I could sleep with a random guy with the snap of a finger because he's desperate, I would very much consider him to be slutty too lol.
@lumos AllThatSweetJazz explained it really well, I don't know why you're still having a problem with this. A slut is a description of a person who is hard to get but also easy. Most guys aren't sluts because they're easy to get, being easy to get just by itself doesn't mean you're slutty.
@lumos @lumos Well then 'slutty' isn't issue then. You can't use your own stipulations for the predefined concepts in the logic and expect the conclusion to be negated. You're just jumbling up the words and calling it a flaw in logic. Slutty can mean whatever you want it to mean, the wording of the statement will simply adapt to conform to the original conclusion. Just pick a definition. Under your definition, 'slutty' isn't the concern, the issue is the magnitude of the challenge as it pertains to fulfilling 'slutty' desires. In other words, the logic of the statment is consistent. You just used different definitions for the words when you first looked at it.
@CanadianNinja @AllThatSweetJazz if you look up definitions of the word "slut" you'll pretty much only find descriptions of how a slut is a woman who has many sexual partners, it doesn't say anything about being easy or hard to get. So by definition, if a man is willing to sleep around, regardless of whether he can or can't, he's a slut/slutty.
It. Doesn’t. Matter. I didn’t even use the word slut, I was just explaining how it was being used. Again, if you want to that definition for use in the statement then fine, the wording will change and the meaning will not. Don’t get tripped up by semantics.
The problem is not her or her past relationships. You should get it by now, get this parasite out of your head. Either give it time or learn how to control your emotions and always remember. Its not her fault.
Relax. You're acting like she's having sex with those guys while you're in the picture. Her sexual history should not affect you or your thoughts on her in any way.
If you're feeling like this, then break up with her. You either man up and move passed it or just end it. She's being honest with you by telling you about her past. It happened in the PAST. She's with you now and cares for you only.
Wow, I'm surprised at people voting B that much. It wouldn't bother me, even if she had more than that. I say have The Talk with her. Get it all out about how you feel and then vow to work through it. If she's a nice girl why let that go?
Oh yea haha, wouldn't bother you, because you're never going to have a long meaningful relationship, haha! So funny! Well bro... seeing the landscape... I'm about to be right there by your side. Faking interest and running at commitment. You're welcome ladies! You added another commitmentphobe to the ranks.
Many are voting B because she deserves better than him. It is for her benefit, not his.
@Manonfire most helpful opinion yet
Virgin has dated more people anyone else and I am on my 5 boyfriend now and I don't really care about his past relationships.
You are tackling this situation really wrong.
This is the reason some people prefer to keep the past to themselves.
First thing u need to know is nobody u date in future is going to be a saint.
Everyone has a past.
(Unless you date a 12 year old)
How many relationships are u going to end bcz of this?
Second thing is that u need to focus on her.
Not her past.
When u started out, the way u felt about her, why u chose her etc.
U need to really reflect on the positive.
Third, ask yourself if u were happy with her before u knew all this.
If u were then I think u shud try to save it.
Fourth, maybe u should tell her about it.
Dealing with her past is not just your problem, the girl shud definitely help u out here.
She needs to show that she wants to be with u.
How u are better than her past.
(Hope that's the case)
But fifth and most importantly, if u don't respect her at all... Then don't go on like this.
Don't have sex with her and say u r disgusted.
That's wrong.
More details please? First, if you can't get over it than you'll be miserable and make her miserable too but when you said you couldn't get over a past... I was expecting someone who used to bar hop and have multiple one night stands, used to be a stripper, had lots of threesomes and foursomes, had been with 50 guys.
Three men that is quite tame... possibly someone who has had three long term serious boyfriends that she was in love with, faithful to and committed to and maybe even saw them as possible husbands one day.
Can you give some more background as to why 3 seems to bother you? Is she your first so that she's the only woman you've been with but your not her first? Was one or more of the three men kind of a promiscuous situation rather than being in love? I'm having trouble following what it is that is getting to you.
Well, this wasn’t written for site traffic was it 😂
I’m going to vote C
Why can't you tell her that you're losing interest in her because of her past? You told all of us with no problem. You mean you won't tell her because she's going to call you shallow. Don't you think she deserves the truth? Most women you're going to meet in your life are going to have a sexual past... what then? Imagine the nerve of her, having sex before you ever met her. Losing respect for her? I'll be willing to bet, any respect she may have had is definitely gone for you. Do you possibly have A. D. D., because you're obsessing over some thing you've no control over. Tell her the truth and I respectfully suggest to you to see your Doctor. There's no reason given you should be worried about an STD, she wasn't a whore. GOOD LUCK!
You disgust me. I hope she breaks up with you and you are never lucky enough to sleep with another women in your life.
I'd understand if she had a ridiculously high number but you're this upset because of three guys? I think the issue is you rather than her in this scenario.
You're thinking about breaking up with her cuz she had 3 guys beside you? Well, let's suppose she's the same age as you are (25-29) if so, I can assure you she's below average for her age.
Seriously, I think you need a therapy or something... you probably had much more than her... so why are you making this a big deal.
And by the way, if you're looking for a virgin, you'll probably die single.
3 guys and you're worried about that? a lot of girls have more at that age and even younger.
It is a purely individual thing but if it is having that much of a negative effect maybe end it that said you are over 25 so if we assume that any potential partners are the same age we have to assume that a very high percentage of the women won't be virgins so it could be a lonely existence.
Not all girls like about their past. Not all girls sleep with every guy they find attractive. We all have a past why hold it against her.
Grow up, you're immature and over reacting. It's you who has the problem. You don't say how many women you've slept with? Should your girlfriend be thinking the same way?