Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health I hooked up with a guy and now a girl is slut-shaming me, what do I do?
Anonymous
Last week my friend Abbey invited me to see some local metal bands with her. I was excited to watch live music, after Covid. Abbey is friends with one of the bands, and some of their fans. This crowd are all metalhead guys and girls. I don't own any rock chick outfits, so I wore a black top, denim shorts, and heels. Abbey's friend Carly said I was "bold" to dress like that at a metal gig, which irritated me. The band were great, and Abbey introduced me to them and they seemed like really nice boys. We went to the drummers house for an afterparty, and on the walk there I talked to the bassist, Steve. Carly gave me evil looks. At the house we were in the living room doing shots, and I sat on Steve's lap. Other guys there started rating the girls on who had the best chests. Abbey, Carly and other girls went along with it, and actually took their tops and bras off. Carly sarcastically said to me, "are you not joining in?" which made me feel singled out. They stayed topless for the rest of the party, which obviously the guys liked. I kept my top on, but I felt isolated, cos if it hadn't been for Carly, I probably would have been OK to do it. After chatting to Steve for ages, we went to a bedroom. I told him I didn't want to have sex, because I don't do that outside a relationship, but I'd be happy to give a blowjob. I did it, we exchanged numbers, went back downstairs. When Carly left she yelled out that I was a slut. This made me feel shit about myself. Abbey said ignore her, and that Carly often gets jealous. Steve has invited me to the band's next gig and after-party this weekend, and I really want to go, but Carly will be there. To make it worse, she has texted Steve offering him a blowjob after the gig. I don’t want a confrontation with Carly but I think it would be a great night, and I would like to get to know Steve better. A couple of other friends have said they would come with me to support me, but I don't know if that would wind up Carly more. Should I go?
Updates:
+1 y
Update: so it’s 6:30am right now and I just got home from the after party. What a night! The gig was great, Steve was super attentive to talking to me. Carly was wearing the exact outfit I wore last week which made me chuckle. So much for the rock chick look haha. My friends came along too and they had a really great time. I did my thing for Steve and it was hot af, and a couple of my friends did the same for some of the guys in the band as well. Carly didn’t try a single thing to upset me!
+1 y
Urgh now Carly is on Facebook telling people I “stole” a guy she has liked for months ffs
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What Girls & Guys Said
26 20Don't change your behavior to accommodate or appease anyone
She's a jealous girl.
Act like it doesn't bother you and the next time she says something mean call her on it.
Well at least now you have her motive.
Don’t even worry about her. She is probably jealous because you are with someone she wanted. You are being invited. Not her. She will either turn things around with you or make a big mistake of losing you
No they are inviting her cos some of the other guys in the band think she’s hot. Me and her aren’t close she’s a friend of a friend. I’m super excited to see Steve and the band and my girls but super nervous about Carly aaargh but thank you for being kind though
Of course.
What did you do with him
Did a bj for him twice after both gigs and now we’re booked in for a date
Very nice. Sounds like you had fun
Yeah it was a great night and he seems like a great guy too 🥰
Yeah hun you should go Carly sounds like a immature insecure jealous bitch
Thank you hun - everyone on gag seems super supportive ❤️ I’ve rallied a few friends to go with me now so I’m feeling much more confident than when I put the question up. Also Steve has told me he’s not gonna let Carly suck him haha!
That's great have fun sweetie
Don’t do that again
" I told him I didn't want to have sex, because I don't do that outside a relationship, but I'd be happy to give a blowjob." News flash girl - a blowjob IS SEX ! It's oral sex, it's just not vaginal penetration. So rationalize as you wish, but you had sex. Now does that make you a slut because you just met the guy? No. Carly IS jealous, or envious, or both. You don't need to confront her. Just know that she wishes it were her getting sex or giving head, and she's afraid to do anything about it.
As for anything lasting with Steve, good luck. You've already established that you're easy, so now what are you going do make him want you as a person and not a place for a blowjob? I'm not saying it can't happen, but how will you be with him next time and say "no" when he wants your mouth?
Hook up with her.. that will shut her up and now you have choices.
Haha I mean she’s pretty, but I’m not sure she’s gonna get anywhere with me 😜
Strictly dickly are ya? 😉 Well this is where you just go on about your business and do whatever it is you do. Honestly she isn't the only one talking shit... she is however the only one with the stones to give no fucks that you know it's her saying it. All the others are the whisperers who are saying shit on the sly. Believe that. What's done is done. Live life be happy and fuck what they think.👍🏾
Let her say what she wants to... keep moving forward.
Nothing. She's right.
ignore and block those jealous people, rock the world ;)
Say HA HA HA HA
I GOT HIM FIRST. 😎
This is actually pretty tempting
Dude ignore everyone. Live your life.
Ignore it.
Unfriend them
Carly is just jealous for some reason. Take your friends that will support you and have a good time. Dont let her stop you from having a good time.
Thanks dude
You're welcome
Carly is just jealous for some reason. Take your friends that will support you and have a good time. Dont let her stop you from having a good time. @Gatorademebiatch
Did you just copy paste @whitewolf69 's opinion? LMAO
Ignore carly because she is definitely jealous and a bit of a bitch from the sound of it, think about Steve and how he makes you feel. If you really like him, make sure to tell him. Confrontation with Carly is a possibility, so maybe tell Abby and Steve before that happens.
Definitely go and f* this bitch. And who is she to hold you back? You do what you want and if she has an issue she can resolve it as an adult with you or get over it. No time for her complexes really. Don't provoke her but also don't give in cause she sounds manipulative and trying to make you feel guilty is part of controlling you.
😊do you think I should still get dressed up and go to the next gig/after party even if she’s there?
Duhh!!! Of course go life is short. And dont allow anyone to slut shame you in the comments or in life. Do what makes you happy and comfortable. I met a random guy at the bar and we made out in the toilets. I blew him twice that night in the toilet and after it he was holding my hand all the way home and we had sex same evening. He took my number but I thought I'd never hear from him. Next day he wrote me to meet again and when we did, we had sex eleven times, he took me for dinner and breakfast. He then took my social media and followed me there. Not saying it wasn't just a summer fling but if it's a match and the guy fancies you as personality and sex is good he'd wanna see you again and spend time with you. I'm not encouraging you to sleep around it's just an example so that you can chill and enjoy yourself. You should be worried only about you and your integrity. Don't compromise yourself for guys or friends. High value or playing hard to get but giving blowjob is such an old fashion way to live your life. Have your standards and live by them for you not because you think it'll get X outcome or the guy you want or give good impression. You must be young and start having experiences. Use protection, be careful with people you don't know but also chill and be you. And Steve could be a great guy or total ass* so don't get feelings before getting to know him. If you are attracted to him and you feel it next time, go for it but not because it's expected because you gave him oral sex previous time.
Wow what a story! It’s a shame you can’t come with me tonight as you sound awesome to party with! I love how direct you were with him, I feel inspired! I think what I’m gonna do is just before he plays the show asking if I can give him another bj afterwards, screw it you only live once!
Haha, I live in Europe but thank you 😊 and yes, do you if you feel like giving him a blowjob do it! Hope you have lots of fun and enjoy it x
Carly is simply jealous. Some girls are like that. Just ignore what she says, having sex with someone you want has nothing to do with being a slut
Thanks hun!! I guess I just couldn’t get my head round jealousy on the unnecessary level she had toward me. Party was fire in the end though. You been to any good ones?
Of course. We are young, we should be happy and not worry about small, stupid things. Do what your heart tells you to do and don't let anyone bring you down ❤
🥰🥰
Next time you go to a party you gonna keep the braid and hoops? ❤️❤️
Yeah most likely ❤❤
Hell yeah girl 🤘😘
She sounds like a shit stirrer and will do anything for attention. Personally I don't think she's worth your thoughts or time so you do you girl and go have fun. This Steve bloke sounds like fun so consider getting to know him better then time will tell. Lots of Love <3
abbey sucks
Tell her it's your life!
I think if she tries to challenge me or call me a name again, it’s my life will be my response for sure. I just really hope Steve doesn’t take her up on her offer before tomorrow night
I'm rooting for you! ☀️
Thank you for being so supportive hun!
My pleasure! Always gotta have a sister's back!
I just texted him asking if I can give him a bj after the gig 😝🤘
Nice! What did he say?
He says I can! And that he’s told Carly he will be busy that night (in response to her request for same) I literally feel like dancing round my room right now