I'm sexually attracted to my cousin. What do I do?

Should I keep ignoring the feeling or embrace it?
Show your attraction / Attempt to have sex with him
Vote A
Be ethical, respect your family and control your sexual desire
Vote B
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Girl Guy
Updates:
+1 y
We don't share the same bloodline! It wouldn't be incest. He's still my cousin though.
0 6

Most Helpful Guys

  • Well, you are anonymous so I can't answer you by your name. I have been sexually attracted to one of my first cousins since I was about 13 or 14, when I first rode to her and her fathers house on my bicycle (about a 15 mile ride) She was hanging up her hose, on a clothes line (when women wore stockings, and some still do by the way) That did it for me. We have talked about sex ever since, and I know a lot about her sexually, and her about me. She is married, I know about affairs, she knows the women/girls I have fucked, (if I can use that word to a girls under 18) We have had many intimate discussions, and have detailed many things that I won't go into here for several reasons. She knows that I would like to screw her, and has known for a long time. She has detailed some intimate things about her husband sexually.

    All of that said, you are not unique in what you feel, and all I can say is that biology is biology and we feel the way we feel for that reason. She and I will in all probability will NEVER have sex, but the attraction is there or we would not have had the interaction we have had. Masturbation is one release, other than that, just be cautious. You are probably about the same age as I when I was attracted to my cousin.

    Bruce

  • It is ok to be sexually attracted to him but I would not act on it. It could just mess things up. Do you have a boyfriend that can help you chill so to speak? Maybe masturbate a bit more to relieve some of the sexual tension. Your thoughts?

    • Yeah I agree. And no, I don't have a boyfriend. I have a hard time dealing with inappropriate crushes, and lately I've been having 3. I don't know how to handle these situations 🤷🏼‍♀️. It's really exhausting trying to control your sexual desire. When I'm around him, I always have to be careful : to not look at him prolongedly, to not observe him for a long time, to not say anything that would reveal my attraction to him. Also, when he asks for hugs I don't seem really excited and I don't hug him warmly. I'm afraid that he thinks about it. I just try to avoid physical touch.

    • It is ok to show some affection and a hug is ok... he is your cousin after all. Just don't go any further. Is he attracted to you?

    • You're right. I don't think he is. He rarely looks at me when we are around family members, in opposition to me. He also seems very comfortable and chill around me.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Girls

  • C'mon, don't fuck your cousin. It'll make things awkward for the whole family because they'll know something is up, even if they don't catch you in the act. It might seem hard to control your sexual desires because you're a horny teenager, but I believe you have enough conscience and self-restraint to make the right decision. Think about the consequences of sleeping with your cousin. The downsides outweigh the potential benefits. Sleeping with him will only give you temporary satisfaction, but the repercussions of getting caught by your family will last forever. You'll always be known as the cousin-fucker.

    • Update: It doesn't matter if you're not blood related, he's still family.

    • Cousin-fucker, I like that !! LOL

    • Actually it does matter that they're not blood related. It seems you're projecting your thoughts on the matter as though she's in your family. All families are different and hers may be more open than yours. Just sayin'.

  • Ah well. If you don't share any blood and cousin marriage is legal were you live, then what's stopping you?

    If it's illegal and/or very taboo in your society and your family, it's simply wise to forget about it.

    My very personal opinion about cousin marriage is not exactly positive. That is, I wouldn't do it. But you're not me.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

6 43
  • The fact that 28 guys at the time of my writing this said have sex with him... men have far bigger mental issues and far, far, far... like gutter trash... lower morals & ethics than one would imagine.

  • I faced the same dilemma with a second cousin who is one year younger than myself. We even went out on a few dates; no sex, but we many kisses which could not be considered "cousinly". The chemistry simply wasn't there for a relationship, so it ended. She remains my favorite cousin and we still see each other. She married a nice guy and has 3 kids.

  • Let's clarify why you call him "cousin" if you do not share a common ancestor.

    • Because he is. He is part of the family. There is my mother. My mother has a brother, who is my uncle. My uncle has married a woman. So, that woman has became my aunt. My aunt has a sister. The son of my aunt's sister, is the guy that I'm talking about.

  • Its a matter of personal conscience and realizing the potential for your ridicule and extortion
    PROVIDING you conscientiously employ both birth control and awareness of STD's.

    If circumstance permits, FUCK LIKE MINKS! Its no one else's business! :)

    • You missed the fact he's her cousin, right? Most people with high morals / ethics would say no. Where's your morals & ethics, in the gutter?

    • @GingerCatLover Ask YOURSELF, whom are YOU allowing to sit in judgement of YOUR decisions? Precluding familial politics, potential conception or STD's... what is the REAL issue you're objecting to? WHOM do you ALLOW to shepherd YOUR sexuality? And what gives them the right?

    • @theorionmage - morals shepherd my sexuality, you moron. Thank you for proving you've the morals of a dog.

    • Show All
  • Even though you are not related, these things can cause rifts in families and also depending on where you are potential negative comments about your family.

    it’s a bit like step kids often have attraction to each other and do have sex, there is nothing legally wrong with it but it can thoroughly mess up the family group.

    Personally I would look for another person, however if you want to go ahead, you both need to discuss the real implications for your respective families, could you both handle them never speaking to each other?

  • Therapy. Assuming you aren't just trolling.

    • Therapy? What?

    • Therapy for being attracted to a person?

    • To your COUSIN, yes! What state do you live in where incest is normal?

    • Show All
  • Life will be easier on you if you ignore that feeling. You could complicate your life a lot if you attempt to have sex with him.

    • I agree. Even showing my attraction to him in a way, could be dangerous for the relations between the other family members. And also it could be dangerous for me. If he doesn't find me attractive, I would ruin the relationship that I have with him right now. He would want to stay away from me

    • If he does find you attractive it could develop more sexually, and then that would complicate the relationships within your family. It is just best to find a different guy to have those feelings for and possibly act on them.

  • You don't say whether he is your first or second cousin. Oh, yes, you did say you are not from the same bloodline, so it wouldn't be incest. If you are not from the same bloodline, then I don't see how there could be a genetic or inbreeding issue. It's just that you're afraid it LOOKS wrong.
    I would say that if you're not from the same bloodline, you could give it a shot but you should, 1, discuss it with him first, what the problems could be and how to handle them, and 2, really sort of what I just said. Decide how you will explain to your family members who might have a problem with this that there really is no problem.

  • Yeah you need to let it go because this is just a moment of time what you do in that moment of time will carry with you for the rest of your life and you don't want that I would ignore it

  • He can look nice, but also remember that the reason why sex within the family boundaries is taboo is because if you fuck up and get knocked up, the chances of the offspring to be just as fucked up are rather large in terms of chance.
    As usual, do as you please since I don't know you, nor I can, nor I care to stop you. But be mindful of the consequences.

  • If you think you can manage it, without embarrassing your family, you can go for it. But pls remember that it might be risky as your family is involved. Do it quietly and be shhh about it, for ever.

  • It is because of your raging hormones. It gives some relief knowing he is not your blood - I mean incest is YUCK! Just get with other guys. Ignore the attraction and try to tell yourself that he is your cousin everytime and it isn’t respectful.

  • If you share no ancestors, then he's not a cousin. How are you related?

    Anyway, if you are interested, just invite him to lunch or something.

    • And I'm also adopted. But my mother is my mother.

    • I see. There’s no reason you can’t date. Ask him out.

  • You are not ‘Blood’ relatives!! You are on opposite sides of the family … your “family-relation” is “happenstance”!! I believe that in this day and age, people would understand the circumstances. The only people that would hold it against you, have nothing better to do …. Follow your heart.

  • Well, me and my third cousin had a thing going on for awhile but as soon as she
    stopped drinking then things ended so I don't know within your case how long
    the bloodline goes?

  • Nothing good can come of this. Forget it.

    • I cannot make my attraction disappear, but I can at least not embrace it

  • Tell him how you feel, see how he reacts

    • Umm. I'm not sure that would be wise.

  • Well its not as if he is ur first blood

    • We are not biologically related at all

    • If there is no real biological link, then fucking him is not incestual. I don't see that as a life changing event, at all.

    • @Bricealan It would be weird because he is within the family enviroment. I don't think that my mother would encourage me to have a relationship with him. I think it would make things complicated and also me and my cousin wouldn't be a good role model for our little cousin who is 9 years old.

    • Show All
  • I'll preface this by saying I am a middle-aged man and I've had an unbelievably strong crush on one female cousin on one side of my family since before I was a teenager. So in some cases it's not just a passing thing. I'm not just sexually attracted to her. I truly love her as a person also and not just cuz she's my cousin.
    If you're worried about it from a biblical sense, nowhere in the Bible does God condemn it. He does condemn some types of relationships, but cousins isn't one of. Look it up.
    If you are worried about it from a scientific standpoint, you're still ok. Studies show there's only about a 5% chance of any type of negative consequences of any offspring and that will only occur if that continued within the same bloodline for five or more generations.
    In America cousin marriages are legal in slightly more more than half of the country (26 states I believe).
    The only reason it was ever illegal was due to smaller communities and the fact there wasn't really an easy or fast way to travel to other communities. This is where the multiple generations risk came into play and adverse effects from procreating. Physical and mental deformities occured.
    Truly it's an archaic law and more than half of America has educated themselves and agree.
    Now as far as family getting pissed or grossed out will be different from family to family. I would just provide them with the proof that it's not incest.
    Then there's the possibility of the relationship ending and the tension it could cause. That's something every individual needs to weigh out for themselves.
    I hope this helps
    P. S. I know some of you will immediately spew your venom in a knee jerk response, but do yourselves a favor and actually do some research before you make yourself look even more ignorant.

  • You cannot have a relationship with him... Breaks social norms..

    You cannot have kids with him.. Against rule of nature..

    Sex as Sport is a human choice for entertainment there are no rules you will be breaking in this sector...

    Best if you avoid him... Don't create a mess..

  • Show More (29)