If a guy pays for an expensive dinner does he expect to get sex at the end of the night? Guys, do you get mad if nothing happens?

Sorry for the bad quality. This was the only pic from dinner and he didnt even focus it well lol
Sorry for the bad quality. This was the only pic from dinner and he didn't even focus it well lol
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  • No boy has every taken me to a fancy dinner. If I accept a date, the boy gets my company; nothing more and most likely he will not expect more; maybe a brief kiss.

    • You are still quite young for a guy to be able to afford a fancy dinner. It will happen someday. Hopefully he will respect you and treat you well.

    • You're right. As well as paying... Nobody is legally obligated to pay. That is something you do to be NICE. Not that you get sex.

  • I never expected sex and never got mad. Some things take time. Sometimes sex did happen and the orgasms were great!

  • Depends on what type of man he is

  • What signal is the expensive dinner intended to convey? I think that is the first question here. An expensive meal is an extravagant display designed to impress on the woman that he is a man of means who is highly interested in her. Trust me when I say, this is not usually something a man does for someone he wants to fuck and not see again. Rich men may take casual flings out for meals, but this means they have to bring their serious girlfriends/partners/wives out for even more extravagant meals. Like any symbolic act, if overused it loses its significance. So for most men, casual flings and hookups take place at the bar not at the restaurant.

    How is the woman supposed to respond (assuming she is interested in the guy)? This is to some extent dependent on culture, but the general rules are: 1) appear too willing, she risks devaluing herself in his eyes, 2) appear too unwilling, she risks appearing uninterested and possibly insulting his generosity. This is a tough balance to strike.

    A man probably does *want* sex after the first date, but if this is meant to be a long term thing then he should not have it.

  • I don't get mad, I just feel played.

    Like if I'm taking someone out for dinner I'm doing it after I thought the sex was locked in already so she woulda had to been throwing a lot of signals like it was on. 😂

    • Just cause a woman shows she’s interested don’t mean she’s gotta put out -.- Just MAYBE she was interested in you… crazy huh!

    • @VanillaSalt fuck that! If I meet a girl and we've been talking and texting and seeing eachother. And she's been flirting with me. Maybe it's a city girl thing. I've heard the dating game is different around here compared to other places.

    • Interesting… I’ve been thinking most of this MGTOW/redpill movements been based off big city girl types but as I live in a smaller town I couldn’t be sure… Women out here have been very different from experience then what I’ve heard from city guys. I’ve seen bad women for sure but nothing like what they’ve mentioned.

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  • Yes but for me it doesn´t need to be sex because I´m not that sexual active, but if she´s not saying anything to show her appreciation like she really loved but says that she realises that has to be a special thing to me to invest that much money in her I consider dropping her after one date because it would make me feel like she used me for an expensive meal.
    by the way I don´t ask of her to talk about feelings towards me but I just ask for a genuine sign that she realizes that I can´t and won´t spend that much money like it´s nothing.

  • Any man who thinks buying an expensive dinner will get him laid shouldn't be getting laid.

    There are such a thing as hookers that cost far less.

    I'm not hating on men for buying dinner. But to get sex you have to be sex.
    It comes down to the image of the guy, what he makes the girl feel, if he displays that he understands what it is to be with a woman.

    Once all these are in place you can get laid after a McDonald's

  • I never 'expect' That is the worst thing a guy can do. It makes him look like a desperate wimp.
    That's not to say nothing ever happens on a first date for me, because more often than not, it does..

  • If you expect an expensive dinner to get you sex then you may as well hire a prostitute. It's basically the same thing.

    Nobody owes you anything for you taking them out on a date. Nobody has a right to be mad over not having sex after a date. If you just wanted sex then there are plenty of people who would be down for that if you just asked in the first place.

    • This I agree with you!

    • @Smashingdoozy Well said. 👏

    • @Jamie05rhs yea that is for sure. As much crap as she spews sometimes. This one was pretty good.

  • There is more to a relationship then sex or spending your money on things. Building a bond and having a good time is better

  • No, not really can't generalize.

  • I have never ever paid for sex or expected sex, at all...

  • Men don’t “expect” sex we hope for it. I don't know where women come up with this expect crap from. We “expect” more then just your time… we “expect” your respect… we might go as far as to “expect” you to reciprocate our feelings… or at the very least kindly turn us down… We “expect” this date to have meaning and help us towards a goal. Like to have the possibility of building a relationship and with that relationship we might “expect” sex to come at some point…


    The only real expectations we have are for you to not waste our time and money. Either your serious about what we’re chasing or your not. Foodie dates are rude. Aka using men for dinners. Being on your phone during the dates rude. Allowing men to pay for every date and knowing they put hundreds into dating you and your not even serious is rude.


    For the few that actually expect sex from a date (very few). Their trash. But women are also trash for not being clear as to their expectations. Men as well… how hard is it? We don’t need a book to tell you not to be a dick to people.

    • After reading some of these replies I understand where women come up with this expectations crap… I’ll say it again… if a man expects sex because he paid he’s trash.

  • Most guys who are well rounded and versed in dating won't take a woman to an expensive dinner date as the first one. That is reserved for girlfriend status or at least when you are four or so dates in.

    Now in terms of that, no. Reason being for that reason alone. If a man is expecting sex as a transaction at the end of an expensive date, it is a foolish move because the woman is not obligated to give it to him, nor should he be expecting it, because then he drops a bunch of money for an expectation he built in his head that may not happen. Which is why those kinds of dates are reserved for more serious relationships.

    Dating is about having fun and getting to to know each other, that much is true, but the cliche dinner and movie as the first date is a bad idea because it puts unnecessary pressure on both and it restricts the amount of fun and interaction to be had.

    In short, fancy dinners are reserved for serious relationships, girlfriends/wife, otherwise it is a no go.

  • I have many years of online dating experience. If a guy expects you to have sex with hm at the end of the night, DITCH HIM!, LEAVE! ABORT THE SCENE IMMEDIATELY.

    Do not feel obligated to sleep with a guy just because he bought you an expensive meal. A man who is truly looking for love will never ever expect you to sleep with him at the end of the meal. After the meal, if he implies sex, that means he never had romantic intentions with you in the first place.

    Vast majority of guys do not expect women to have sex with them after the first or second date. If a guy ever pressures you to have sex with him after the first few dates, it means he likely sleeps around or is a pervert. You're not missing out on anything dumping a guy like that. Trust me, I have many years of dating experience. Men who are genuinely looking for love will not pressure you to have sex with him on the first few dates.

  • I can buy my own food thanks.
    If I’m going on a date it doesn't mean I’ll have sex with you after. What happened to getting to know someone first? If a man thinks paying for a meal means im going to have sex with him then he has another thing coming.
    I have money, I don’t need a man to pay thanks.

    • That's great! I mean it is very nice to pay. But not needed. That is why I am waiting until marriage or one reason. I will know she has good morals. As well as build a strong bond

  • "If a guy pays for an expensive dinner does he expect to get sex at the end of the night?"

    If he does, he should have said then when he made the invitation. "If I take you to dinner, will you sleep with me?" In his memoir "Surely You're Joking, Mr. Fenyman", Richard Feynman wrote that he had more success with showgirls when he asked directly, instead of just asking them to dinner.

    When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect civil behavior and hope for good conversation. I take dates to restaurants I like and don't worry about the cost. I do not expect sex or even a kiss. That way I'm never disappointed.

  • I mean that's why both of you shouldn't go to that dinner unless if you two have some understanding of what's gonna happen.
    You can't expect something that was never made clear then get mad when it don't happen. Get a mutual understand of what's exacting happening just get straight to the point no beating around the bush.

  • He was probably disappointed with the lack of tits, to be fair.

    Joking aside, I have always subscribed to having a 60% outcome before attending meetings, dates and get togethers.

    You SHOULD know if the date is ending in sex or not, before you attend. It's the whole point of the conversation before. The date is just to bring both parties together and see if the agreed deal can be sealed... or not.

    Tinder and dating apps have fucked up the game somewhat, as people "expect" instant results for little work.

  • I don’t pay for someone who isn’t invested in me. That “tradition” stems from a time when men were thought to be only valuable for their resources and women were thought to be only valuable for their physical affections. Now that we know better, why would i pay for nothing more than a woman’s company? Is her company inherently more valuable than mine? Does she not have to prove her value to me as i do mine to her? Dudes who still pay for women they don’t know are fools.

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