Is it a bad idea to wait for marriage before having sex?

[Anonymous]

[slatyb]

It’s a bad idea if it’s going to cause you to rush into marriage young. It’s a bad idea if you get married without discussing your hopes for your future sex life. Sexual compatibility isn’t automatic. If one of you is masturbating twice a day and is expecting to have sex at that frequency after marriage, and the other is imagining having sex weekly, the marriage will be frustrating for both. If one of you is expecting a varied sex life and the other has no notion of anything other than man on top PiV you will both be disappointed. So if you aren’t going to do it, you better talk about it a lot. What I would ask a prospective partner: do you masturbate? How often? What do you fantasize about? Do you watch porn or read erotica? What do you like? How do you feel about oral sex? Anal? Are you turned on by BDSM or other kinks?

[markscott]

We waited for marriage, and have always been glad that I did. It made everything much more special, and makes our bond on love all the stronger.

[Babygirl_S]

It is the best idea. You can avoid emotional baggage, comparisons, STDs, unwanted pregnancy etc. and it weeds out the guys who are only looking for sex.
The only reason many people don't do it is because it's hard.

[AzureGirl]

It’s not a good or a bad thing. It’s simply something a person can decide based on what they’re most comfortable with.

[btbc92]

Look up the studies, they tell you that many divorces are the cause of premarital sex, shacking up before marriage and if they lost their virginities before 18 years old. It is a bad idea. Not just because of its fornication, but because sex is a marriage and marriage is all about having sex. The person will just use you for sex and then hop out if he or she isn't happy. Sex is an expression of love. Not entertainment, performance or just pleasure. It is not a bad idea to wait for marriage to have sex. Just find somebody who equally shares your values and has a healthy outlook on sex. Sex is a part of YOU. Anybody else who wants to say don't wait are just bitter they didn't wait. They have to live with their choices. YOU do NOT have to be one of them. Because if you hold out, they can't have sex with you. That means another less person they can EXPERIMENT with.

[PrudentGuy]

I used to think I was. But now no.

Reason: relationship is fragile now. Almost every first marriage ends in a divorce. So why wait?

Get a person who is sexually compatible may perhaps cement a better marriage. (Not too promiscuous though. It erodes trust.)

[SimpleRhubarb]

It’s not a bad idea, but I think it’s smarter not to wait if you’re looking for permanent commitment.

[Altaïn]

I'm saying yes just because everyone likes different things, if you wait till marriage to have sex just to find out that you and your partner are not sexually compatible then that leaves in a pretty awkward position.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Statistically speaking, you will have a better marriage and enjoy sex more if you wait for marriage.

[godfatherfan]

One of the worst possible things you can do. Marriage is already difficult. I was with my exwife 25 years and married for just over 20, I know what I am talking about.
You can't learn sexual compatibility. There are things that could be an issue, that you won't know about until you try them. I have always thought this, but once I actually broke up with a woman due to sexual incompatibility, I knew I was right. Besides, do you really want your wedding night ruined by pain and bleeding and whatnot?

[Lloyd_the_Ace]

It's not a bad idea and it works for some people, but it's personally not the thing for me.

[MikeWillson]

Yes, you should always buy the car before you test drive it.

[ShortCircuit]

No, as long as you properly vet your partner for sexual compatibility before getting married, and you're both capable of resisting temptation without being stressed.

[R4vedave]

Absolutely. Physical and sexual satisfaction is an important part of a healthy, long term relationship.

Waiting until you've already made a life-long commitment to see if you have good sexual chemistry, is absolutely asinine. You don't know if you enjoy the same things sexually, you don't know if you work well together in the bedroom, the two of you don't even know what your kinks and interests are.

It's all ludicrous. I'll never endorse waiting until marriage 🙅‍♂️ Virginity is not important, nor is it special.

[Dargil]

No, but I think advancing sexual intimacy is critical to a strong relationship.

[madgoat]

I think a sexual element to a relationship helps to make it deeper and more intimate than it would otherwise be. It's not just the act itself, it's the level of immersion it generates.
Therefore I suggest waiting until marriage is a bad thing.

[linda86]

know if you like it or not.

[Rose_88]

No it isn’t

[Phoenix98]

No it's not bad, just make sure that your partner is on the same page as you are.

[AngelLily]

No not at all it's actually better.

[Insightfull]

It's a bad idea for many reasons.
- You don't find out if you're sexually compatible until you're committed to spending the rest of your life together.
- You might be getting married for the purpose of having sex and then once having sex, you find out that the feeling between you is gone.
- You won't know whether the sex is good because you won't have a reference.
- lust is not love. Some people confuse the two, and if you've haven't had sex with others then how will you know the difference?
- When in love the sex gets better as the emotional connection deepens. When in lust it fades. You want to marry for the former, not the latter, and you won't know that until you've had sex a lot of times with a person.

- also, related, live together for at least a couple years before getting married so you have had a chance to get on each others' nerves and fall out of love, and haven't.

[adolescentswede]

Depends on you values and desires, there is no objective correct answer without an aim

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Your husband would like in today's world it does not matter what matters is being loyal after marriage..

[Dchrls78104]

On the contrary, it is the ultimate good idea!