Is it normal for me to be resentful that my boyfriend doesn't care about his appearance at all while I care about mine?

[Anonymous]

I just broke up with him because he was dishonest. Ex boyfriend over 13year older than me. divorced recently. no money, was living with his parents. (He didn't tell me all that up front either) we were in a relationship 3 months and he gained a lot of weight -at least 15 lbs in that time. I tried hard to look good for him and did not get fat. I am not perfect but definitely above average with big boobs and small waist. I have nice long hair and pretty eyes. I always tried to look pretty for him, especially around his friends. I wanted him to be proud. even though he was old I liked his personality and thought he was cute. He had a nice face and smile even though his hair was beginning to thin out If he treated me lovingly and respectfully I wouldn't care that he gained weight and would have still enjoyed making love. But all he wanted to do was lie on couch and have sex but he never tried to make me cum. I did not orgasm once. I spoke to him several times about it and he didn't care. He told me its enough that he spends money on me (he wasn't even spending a lot at the end) and that should satisfy me enough. He talked down to me and I felt so disrespected plus he lied about things and didn't care one bit about my pleasure. At the end of our relationship he and i were at a party. my friend was too. She pulled me aside and said: "you look so beautiful and young and he looks old and overweight. If he treats you right and you are happy I am happy. But tonight seeing you together it looks like this relationship benefits him way more than you. " And I realized I wasn't happy. I don't expect expensive gifts and dinners. But he didn't respect me, lied to me, and wasn't making me happy emotionally. seeing him turn into a couch potato when I am so much younger and thinner. yeah I felt resentful and at the end I wasn't into the sex at all. Initially i was attracted to him but it wore off because of his lack of care. am i awful person?

[ESPNforever]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Are you serious? lol 9 out of 10 the shoe on the other foot, he would have left you. There isn't a man alive that would get with a Kim K and dreams she looks like Adele when they wake up, just doesn't happen. Not saying that isn't beautiful too, just saying. It's totally natural to feel that someone should take pride in their figures if that's what attracted you to him in the beginning, because that's what they're going to expect from you. Not only did he gain weight, but the sex was wack and he went out of his way to disrespect you on a regular basis. Shows you have a big heart. That is a huge difference in men and women right there, maybe 2% of of men will stay with a chick whose sex is wack. 1% haven't been caught yet, lol. No one buys a lambo and hopes to wake up to a caravan, so it's totally normal. You not wanting to be mistreated doesn't make you a bad person. Peace

[koko124]

People will tell you it's normal, but you're taking a very unbalanced approach to resent him for that, and not resent yourself for all the advantages that you have.

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[koko124]

eh nvm, misread it

[playdates]

No one likes a lazy fuck no matter how "nice" they are. I am not talking about the relaxed, laid back kind. I am talking about the partner that doesn't put your needs in his mind. I'm nodding my head along with everyone else: this shouldn't even be a question! Clearly he fucking sucks, so yeah.

[Deft_maiden]

Not in the least bit!! Don't sell yourself short and don't second guess yourself.
Have a higher standard and choose your men widely.
I can't believe this is even a question 😳