Is it okay if your S/O is SUPER rough and degrading during sex?

[Anonymous]

This guy I like and he likes me back acts exactly like one of those degradation porn videos. He says he’s going to “use and abuse me and then throw me on the street” he’s asked me if he could slap me, he says he will “destroy my pussy” and he says “I know you’re not excited about getting it in the ass but you’ll have to. Maybe you’ll like it.” He’s said things like “I wanna make you cry” “beg for it” “be my slave” “I own you” “you’re my property” “choke on it” “shut up and keep sucking” “I’m gonna shut you up with my dick in your mouth” “you’re gonna get used and abused” etc.

I’m a virgin. This guy is much older and experienced than me. He wants to be as rough as possible during my first time. I just wanted to know if this is normal or if I should feel degraded when he says super aggressive things. I know it’s a kink and I want to satisfy and please him and learn about his desires but I just need advice on how far I should let him take this and when to draw the line. I’m kinda starting to feel a bit like a toy and a prostitute rather than someone he loves. Is this normal behaviour? I’m just so young and inexperienced and he’s my first sexual experience and I just need advice on all this as it’s very new to me. Thanks.

[nobody123me]

It's your first time so gentle, a lot of people are saying "if it's what you're into" but really after your first time or even a few times after would be more appropriate for this kind of action because it is painful to lose your virginity and you may even be sore afterwards I suggest using lube or even a lubed condom for your first time it'll help ease the pain.

[jaydin-cooper]

You shouldn't feel like you have to do something that you're not comfortable with.

If you feel uncomfortable or forced STOP. If he insist, get out.

As a couple you should respect each others boundaries.

[Asker]

I can’t just get out every time a man wants to have sex with me though or I’ll be left with no relationship. Part of a relationship is pleasing your man and that often includes extending your boundaries a bit to adjust to his.

[Anonymous]

If that's what you're into...

[Anonymous]

If he says that it doesn't mean he's going to do it actually, at least not during your first time

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[Opinion Owner]

A guy can say "weird" things when he's horny however that doesn't mean he's literally going to do everything he said or at least part of what he said, especially knowing that you're a still virgin

[Asker]

That’s true. He talks about it a lot tho

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah I know because I'm the same way haha

[Asker]

Okay lol that’s good I was getting kinda nervous because we haven’t even met in person yet and I’m a teenage virgin so I didn’t know if I would be able to handle all that rough sex when I’ve barely had my first kiss lol