Is what I’ve experienced common from dating apps?

[Anonymous]

27F, been on and off the apps for years. I’ve tried them all, I’m now trying bumble because the guys that have been reaching out to me I wasn’t interested in (luck still sucks). The one time I dated a guy for a few months, I wanted it to end because I feel like I settled due to lack of physical attraction. I feel like I settled because of low self esteem. Now, I’ve been on bumble for a brief while and met up with two guys. The first guy seemed to like me but I didn’t like him. I met up with another guy, we talked for a few hours and he seemed interested in meeting up again. I liked him up till the second meetup, he ended up irritating me & called it quits (I’m not lying when I say he just beat me to it). I want the romance from dating, just a little note that I don’t really have sexual desire. I like the thought of intimacy like kissing etc but I don’t masturbate and haven’t had sex in years. Could that contribute to my lack of success? Or am I just not meeting the right guys? I feel like dating shouldn’t be this hard, my life is all about shutting down the ones I don’t want & the ones I do want don’t feel the same way. Quite frankly, even if I’m ace I don’t see how that would affect my dating life especially in the early stages. It’s all about getting to know the person anyway, I don’t think that all guys just want sex. I don’t think I’m terrible looking, I don’t see how I’ve only attracted men I don’t want. I’m going to be thirty and this is sad. I’ve only used dating apps to meet people.

[Markm3212]

dating apps are hard, take it from me i was on a few, but after a lot of dates that didn't go far, the right one comes along.

i guess its the way that you look at it. i used to say it was better to go out ad meet someone new and have a drink or dinner or what ever, than staying in on my own and not meeting new people. yes i met lots of people that from the first point i knew that it wasn't going to work. one turned up and i didn't even recognize her, her pics were at least 5 years old and she had changed a lot in that time... but i had a pleasant evening and chatted, so was worth it.

i feel that with dating apps, people expectations grew. you could see lots of pics of hot men/women that you can only dream of and and you felt that you were in with a chance, where as had that been in a nightclub, you wouldn't have approached them as they would have been out of your league. also some people do not interact very well over messages and such and meeting them is a totally different experience in real life and thats the only way you get to see the real them.

with regards to thee not wanting sex, that could be a big part of it, as i believe that a lot of men (not all), are looking for that spark, that sexual chemistry. im not saying that it has to be on the first night, but it needs to be there, and are you maybe giving off a friends vibe by not wanting/being interested in sex? just a thought.

anyways my advise would be keep going, as if your not looking then you will not find mr right, and he may pass you by. you need to be in it to win it. good things come to those that wait etc etc etc but the one that i really useed to like was my dads saying, you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find the princess 🤣 good luck and please dont give up. persevere itll be worth it when you find the right man

[slatyb]

All I can say is that Match. com worked for me and my wife. If I were single I would do it again.

[magiusX26]

that intamacy (sexual component) very well be a big factor in your sucess. its not abnormal to not want sex but very uncommon.

[Anonymous]

Dump the apps and do it the old fashion way.