My boyfriend is a virgin and he wants to wait a little but I need sex?

[Anonymous]

it's not clear. so my boyfriend is a virgin and i am not. sex is really important to me. i am 17 years old. i understand my boyfriend wants to wait and he's not ready but i get aroused a lot especially that he's very hot. how can i get him to trust me to have sex with me? u don't want to break up with him because i really love him and he does and i have been dating him for over 6 months, but the thing is that i really really need sex and i am a bit frustrated. is talking to him about it would be pushing him? help me how can i convince him for sex?

[Nanda]

I have answered. Since u love him u must wait a bit more. U can force since looks like ure ready and u guys are soo young. 6 months for many even for me could be a very short time btween getting to know someone and sleep with that person. Iam sure ull be the first option he will consider when he gets ready that he's aware of ur sexual qualities so maybe there's nothing much u can do but wait.

[Asker]

i will ask and talk to him about it.

[Nathalyy]

Girl your hormones are just crazy right now and is understandable, you don't need sex there's just a part of the month where we feel more aroused and its fine but him not being ready is not a problem! Just wait the right time will come! Don't keep bringing that up all day everyday let him come out of his comfort zone, and if he hasn't is because yah are not doing things right!

[Asker]

i talked to him yesterday for the first time about it and he said he doesn't feel comfortable.

[Nathalyy]

You see, then you haven't helped him get out of his comfort zone and that's not good because yah have 6 months already, and that's a time were you guys are suppose to be more comfortable, more open and his not on the same page. Probably you having experience intimidates him and you have to be caring show him you love him, not just with words but actions. Be goofy or anything that you know will get him to feel comfortable. Talk to him about the stupidest thing and like that he will become more open

[Asker]

i just realized he has anxiety disorder. we were simply talking and this subject got opened.

[GoldenSunshine]

You can talk to him about why he wants to wait and if it's because of insecurity you could try to make him feel more comfortable. But if he just isn't ready I think that you should respect his decision, and if you can't you obviously shouldn't be dating him.

[Asker]

talking it is./ i will talk with him

[WiiU89]

Respect your man. If you can't, you don't love him

[Tunakid]

Seventeen and craving sex that much... okay im not here to judge. I have some advice: respect that he wants to wait to have sex with you and dont try to force it or he will most likely get frustrated too. If he doesn't want to yet you can't do much about it besides wait and let time do it.

[Asker]

i do crave it a lot. maybe i should stick to masturbation...

[Tunakid]

Probably the best thing to do for now since if he doesn't want to have sex you can't do too much about it, just wait for him to want to, its worth the wait if you really love him :).

[Asker]

i do... and he does. and th good thing is that we both don't have this "am a guy i mush want sex" "am a girl i must not want sex" thing.

[ButtHearth]

You're not entitled to sex. You should have to wait for him. I'm sorry, but that's what us guys get told when we try to pressure our girlfriends into sex. And I don't believe in double standards.

[Asker]

i think i should wait for him because i do love him as well. and i don't want to make him feel bad.

[275153]

One hell of an answer. That's exactly right.

[Whitestone1]

If you aren't willing to wait you shouldn't be with him. you shouldn't be trying to convince him. If you aren't able to wait you should find someone else to be with.

[LastGirlScout]

If he isn't ready then don't pressurise him, that's pretty shitty. When he's ready he'll let you know. Until then you'll have to flick the bean and wait it out.

[Asker]

most people here think i should talk about it because we haven't had a fully conversation about it, we just opened the subject once 5 months ago and he simply said he's not ready.

[LastGirlScout]

Yeah talk to him, but don't put any pressure on him.

[Asker]

i will ask him about it. if he doesn't feel comfortable or anything.

[275153]

Thank you! Sane answer!

[Thewhitestdudeever]

Rape him? I don't know haha grab his cock and see what happens

[kelly173815]

If he's stated that he's not ready, then you can't try and convince him into that, that is pushy. How about you respect the fact that he wants to wait and not just think of you're own needs

[Asker]

so i should repress my needs... cool. relationships are so fun

[kelly173815]

Yep, pretty much. It's called having respect for eachother.

[Asker]

but i will wait. if i love him i will wait... for him. don't want any girl steal his virginity i wanna be his first lol

[kheserthorpe]

Are you sexual with each other at all?

What is he waiting for? To be more comfortable, or for marriage, or what?

[Asker]

to be more comfortable.

[Asker]

we have make out sessions all the time and many times i gave him a boner, but we don't talk about sex much. we do talk a little naughty with each other and make few jokes but that's it. only flirting

[kheserthorpe]

Well you certainly are 'allowed' to talk about what you want, just like he is. And he might be much more ready to move up to fingering and hj or oral sex - things with no pregnancy risk. Or not. But there's no reason to feel you can't talk about it.

[Asker]

alright. talking it is

[CrazyMinta]

Talk to him explain about your needs and how you feel when he denies you what's yours.

[275153]

Guilting him into committing statutory rape is not the right thing to do.

[Asker]

woa you're saying i should rape him? i am not a sadistic freak ok?

[275153]

No. I'm saying that the opinion offered will lead into him feeling guilty for not attending to your sexual needs nap, he might give in and have sex with a minor out of guilt. That's statutory rape.

[RBT-RS]

Calling troll question here, usually it's the other way around.

But short answer, just talk to him about it.

[Asker]

it's not a troll. and for your information girls do need sex. :O shocking!!!11!!!

[RBT-RS]

I am aware of that, it just seems the situation is a little too odd.

[Asker]

it's not... and this is a huge example for that. but girls used to suppress their own needs because of religions and many other laws. and many girls say they wanna wait even if they crave sex too much but they say it because of the society, they don't wanna seem like sluts. and many guys do the other way round also because of society, this is why i love my BF. he doesn't hide his feelings

[RBT-RS]

Fair enough. My previous statement still stands, just talk to him about it.

[Asker]

few people here said it will seem as if i am pushing him. how can i open this subject with him without seeming like i am pushing him?

[RBT-RS]

Short answer, is, he's your boyfriend: You shouldn't need to be sugar coating things, or bypassing the main message of a subject. Just be direct with him.

[Asker]

talking it is.

[Klaatu51]

tell him that there's no point at all to remain a virgin ;-)

[275153]

What about his feelings? Don't they count?

[Klaatu51]

@275153 dude i believe it's better to have sex asap because you'll never know when you break up XD

[275153]

Meh!

[CuriousCatbug]

if ya say ya love him, ya wait ^_^ he's ready when he's ready

[Jbgurl20]

Talk to him about it. Sex is important but communication is way more important than sex. Lol communicate with him. Ask him what he thinks about having sex or if he wanna do it with u. Dont be shy to ask and tell him about your feelings, tell him you want to get intimate and make love with him.

[Asker]

alright. i will talk

[275153]

Hard to say. But you realize you are asking him to commit statutory rape right?

[Asker]

... i mean how can i talk to him about it. we talked to it early in the relationship. is asking him about it now would help?

[275153]

Talking about it may help, or may hurt. At nearly 50 years old talking about sex gets me exited. I can imagine a couple of teens talking about it would be torture. Look, the sane thing to do is get by with masturbation until you are both 18, the have sex like rabbits. (Just wear a condom please). But, you being teens, won't want to do the same thing. Absent that, there are ways of pleasuring each other without penetration and vaginal sex. I'm sure there are plenty of material that talk about that. Being a 50 year old men, I feel creepy telling that stuff to a minor girl. It's the effing hormones guys. They rule a teen's life unfortunately.

[Asker]

i am 17 and he'll be 18 in few months.

[275153]

Yep! I know. By the way there is a misperception out there that if two minors have sex it's not statutory rape. I'm here to tell you it is and it's the boy's fault. I'm a lawyer. I know what I'm talking about.

[Asker]

but in the USA the allowed age for sex is 16. and why is it the boy's fault?

[275153]

It actually depends on the state. Most states say 18. The boy is at fault because that's how it's been done for ever. Now if he was younger and the woman was over the age of majority, then the woman would be at fault. Like that teacher.

[RasmusAiken]

This would not be statutory rape in my state.

[Lovinu20]

U do not deserve his virginity anyways so consider yourself lucky

[Asker]

and why so?

[Lovinu20]

For one, you already had your first time with someone else, and he will not get that in return when (or if) he has his first time with you. It is not as mutual. Second, you seem to be sex hungry and he seems to be more patient and cautious which is not a bad thing for him. Maybe there is a mismatch and incompatibility i am picking up

[Asker]

we didn;t talk about sex. only once after one month of becoming together he mentioned that he wanna wait and i said nothing. i want to know if he still wanna wait and i will wait for him because i love him a lot and he does too, and the reason we dated is that we have so much in common between us.

[Lovinu20]

I am just telling you if it were me i would dump u in a heartbeat. Me being a virgin myself, virginity is a dealbreaker for me

[Asker]

really? so just because i have needs and he disagree we should break up? if i say i am hungry for food and he's not we should break up? sex need is a need just like any other one. some people want sex and others don't.

[RoderLK]

How would you like if it were the other way around and he was trying to push you into something you're not ready?

Not all of us are out of control sex driven dogs that have to be always be ready for sex at all times. I find this really ironic to be honest. Many girls complain about not finding a guy that doesn't sleep around nor tries to quickly get in her pants, only to then leave.

She stumbles into us virgins or a guy with a low sexual history but yet questions why he doesn't want to have sex already and is taking his time?

[RoderLK]

So what exactly do they want?

[Asker]

what i mean is that is it appropriate to talk with him about it and ask him again because the only time we talked about it is after one month of being together.

[RoderLK]

Sure, you can talk to him about it without sounding pushy.

[Asker]

also this is a prove that actually not all girls are the same. each individual is different. for example many girls want sex and many don't. it's different from one to another. there's no such thing as "what women want". you can't say what do black people want or what do white people want. everybody is different and each person has different needs from another.

[Asker]

so if a girl says her BF is pushing her or complains about a guy that want sex doesn;t mean that all girls don't want sex.

[RoderLK]

If a girl finds herself in that position then it means there is a mismatched. She should be with someone she's compatible with on the waiting time frame.

[Asker]

i would wait for him then. i don't want to break up because of that.

[RoderLK]

Yes, if you want to continue the relationship then wait till he's ready.

[HonestWhiteGuy]

You should let him know how you feel, be direct about it thats what guys understand :P

[AlwaysBelieving]

Have you tried talking to him? See what his reasons are, etc.

[Asker]

i will try to talking to him. we didn't really have an open discussion about it, just once 5 months ago i guess the conversation was brought up and he told me he isn't ready yet. but now it's been 6 months since we've been together so will it be me rushing him if i ask him abiut it?

[Inkfiniti]

Ummm

[kashish198080]

What u need sex or love

[IWantToBeVirginFree]

He’s dumb for not wanting to have sex yet

[Anonymous]

Well, you could ask him to preform oral on you if you're in a desperate need for it. Just ease him into the idea, let him know what you want and try to make compromises for it, like the oral. Don't make him rush into it, it could lead right to disaster.