My dads mad at me for having sex in my own room at 18?

Im 18, I pay my phone bill, pay to fill our car with gas weekly and what else not but here recently (literally today) my dad caught me n my boyfriend (19) and got pissed. I AM on birth control, can confirm condoms are being used. I just don’t understand why ((it was 3am FYI))?

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  • You are doing nothing wrong in a general sense. In fact, your responsibility is off the charts awesome.

    But.

    First, as frustrating as it is, it's still "his" house. Or, better yet, he's the parent. Most parents get weird about their kids having sex anywhere, let alone in the house. (Which is stupid, frankly, because kids are going to have sex so parents ought to want that to be in the safest place possible, but this is a rant for another day.)

    Second, it's possible you have siblings and he didn't want them hearing you?

    Third, is it possible you might have been making too much noise? Rhetorical question; I don't need the answer to it but it's one possibility. And, remember, we always think that we're quieter than we really are.

    Finally -- and I think this is the real issue -- you are your dad's daughter. Dads struggle to see their girls as adults. As sexual beings. My bet would be that he wants you to be his little girl and not sexually joined with another. And so his being pissed is the behavioral manifestation of his frustration of that.

    Want my advice? You are technically an adult wanting to do adult things. Handle this in an adult way. Take your dad out for coffee or sit him down some day when it can just be the two of you. Talk to him very respectfully. Lay out that while you are an adult, you recognize that you live in his house and you will respect his rules and desires. (Undercut all his arguments before he can make them.) BUT... then tell him that sex is a normal part of a healthy adult life and a vital part of your health and life. Let him know that you plan to continue having sex and that your preference would be to do it in a safe place. (Appeal to him on the safe part.) But then re-stress that you will respect the family and boundaries, etc., and be discreet, and hope that he'll allow you to continue.

    • @Asker I really hope that wasn't you disagreeing/disliking my reply. Would rather you tell me.

    • Instead of a big thing. Just tell her that her boyfriend used her good and she can kiss him good bye bye because he will not be marrying her 90% of the chance. I would draw a z score for how many times girls have been used up and then dumped. She is young and she needs to be responsible to her body. I am not Christian but God I don't like Andrew Tate but even he pointed out that there are no virgin Christian girl by the age 25 but there are almost all Muslim girls. Look buddy, she should stop and listen to the man and woman who gave birth to her. SHE NEEDS TO MARRY THAT SO CALLED BOYFRIEND OF HER'S. He loves her doesn't he?

    • Gave you a funny react just in case you think you I disliked your comment

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, think about it. It is his home, and he decides what goes on there, even at 18. My girlfriend and I used to fuck in our living room at my parents' house, and I'm sure they knew it, and my dad told me in so many words that it was not acceptable.

    Looking back, WE SHOULD have gone to a motel rather than to mom and dad's place.

    Think about it. I was 24 at the time an in college, and had little money, but still not right for us to do that in my mom and dad's place.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Yes, you're an adult and not doing anything wrong. Yes, you're pulling your weight in the household. Yes, it's not a secret that you're sexually active. Despite all of that, witnessing your child having sex would be unacceptable for most parents. As long as you live there, you should respect your parents' rules even if you don't agree with them. It'll also show your parents that you're mature enough to understand that.

  • I mean it's, your dad... That's their thing. Wait till you have a son lol. Just don't get caught girl

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What Girls & Guys Said

4 42
  • Lets be honest. Your dad already knew you were having sex. He is not mad at that. He is mad at catching you. As silly as that is.

    Much like you wouldn't like to walk in on him having sex, same goes the other way. With some added instincts to protect and shelter you.

    If you want to be able to do things freely, get your own place. Otherwise, keep it to situations where you won't be caught. Being a little secretive can be fun at times.

  • When you grow up, you'll understand.

  • It's natural. His house his rules.

    • She should know better that she should have gotten married to him. If she is 18 she is also eligible for marriage. The punk is mostly thinking I got what I want, let's dump her

    • @AmeerX maybe I don't know.

    • They mostly do this. Waste time for girls

  • Because to him, you doing that in his house at 3AM when you should be asleep indicates you aren't prioritizing your time, and that you aren't prioritizing his sleep. Therefore, it's deemed disrespectful. Plus, if you get pregnant, where's the extra money coming from? Some babies defy protection methods, and happen anyway.

    It's preferred you have your own place, as unfeasible as that is with all the WEF manipulation making the housing market a nightmare.

  • When I was over 18 and I got a girlfriend was about the time I moved out.

    I didn't want my parents to hear us fucking, and I'm sure they didn't want to hear it either.

  • It's his house, and unless he has cleared that you can have overnight visitors. It's a problem. Especially if the boyfriend hasn't been approved by him. He doesn't want to raise a 304. So he wants you to do a proper screening of any dating candidates.

  • Fathers can be weird, although I'm not sympathetic. You are an adult. Adults have sex. You are being appropriately careful to prevent unwanted pregnancy.

    Have you tried talking to your father? Or is he unable to discuss it?

  • I will never understand why anyone would have sex knowing their parents or kids can hear it. I find it highly awkward and gross.
    Find somewhere else to do it lol.

  • In the butt?

  • He probably feels he can set and enforce rules in his home.

  • If you live with your parents, you must follow their rules, and it sounds like the rule is "no sex in the house". Either move out on your own or find a private place to be with your boyfriend.

  • It is his house, his rules. I would be very disappointed in you myself.

  • Next time, have it in his room!

  • Is this his house?

    • In his name, I pay for half of the internet, phone bill and lot rent

    • I see. I see why you’re upset, however at the end of the day the mortgage is in his name. That being said, moving forward have car sex. Or move out

  • No parent wants to hear anyone having sex in their house except themselves.

  • Yes you are all of those. Still you are living under your parents roof so you must abide by their rules.

  • Glad to hear your doing all those things, but it is still his house and his rules. Plus it was 3 am in the morning, maybe he heard you, maybe he has work in the morning, maybe you have other siblings and doesn't wanted them to see or hear. It is good you are being responsible, but when your older, and have kids you will probably feel different.

  • You have to abide by his rules if it's his house.

  • It is his house and he can have rules that you have to follow while you live there and if you choose to live there, you would have to follow his rules.

  • I would be livid

    • I literally pay bills here tho?

    • Gas and your own cell phone?

    • How does that matter? Sex is sex and it’s your dads house.

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