Good for you two, at least someone has the willpower to save it for marriage. My husband and I were each other's first, everything. We didn't quite make it to being married before we were too tempted to try it out! We were seriously engaged though.
From a virgin : virgin perspective. Make sure that your first time is able to be a slow build up at your pace, make sure that you are ready. Extra lubrication like Astroglide or similar is your best friend, even if you are gushing with your own natural lubrication. As others have stated, no he probably won't last all that long, big deal; it might be that way because virgin girls aren't ready for a guy who lasts half an hour and gets her rubbed raw literally. It's ok if he doesn't last, just love him I and reassure him that you enjoyed the ultimate closeness that a couple can experience.
Both if you, especially him need to understand that your wedding night you will both be so tired, read that exhausted that you may not be ready for sex. We didn't have sex on our wedding night,,,, it began as a long day especially for me, we were so exhausted all we wanted to do was sleep! That's alright too! We crawled in bed and just snuggled together, we spooned until I fell asleep (I think) and woke up snuggled together. It wasn't until like mid-morning that
We actually had sex after we both took a wonderful bath in a tub for two, it was so relaxing and we were energized enough to enjoy ourselves. Moral of that story; don't rush into having sex right after the wedding just because you can. You have a lifetime to enjoy sex with eachother so what's the rush? It will be so much better if you wait until you're both rested and ready.
For your own personal preparation, there is nothing wrong with learning what feels good to you beforehand. As in take matters into your own hands, learn to orgasm, what it feels like and what gets you there, what gets you turned on and really excited sexually. Some girls use their fingers to begin dialating their vaginal opening prior to their first time with a partner. This will help, especially if he continues before he enters you for the first time, it will help you to relax with something foreign in your vagina. That's the whole key to having a great first time is being able to relax when his penis enters your first time? Communication is key, if it hurts you're not ready, tell him if it does. Do something different for a while and try again later. There's no rush, it's better if you don't !
TY--oh my this is very comprehensive! I really appreciate this!
Foreplay and lots of it. He's not going to last very long the first round. He'll probably last all of 60 seconds and it's over. It may take hours for him to recuperate or fifteen minutes. And that will be your marriage for the first half a dozen (+) tries. In fact it'll take him a really good while to learn how to control it, throw it off, and stay hard longer so you can cum too. Communicate to him what works for you and try to get off before he does until he learns how to manage his orgasm. You might luck out, as some of us do, and penetration turns out to be decent, and when I say decent, I mean that you actually get to have a real orgasm from his penis alone. But if it doesn't (for you), that's (unfortunately) normal (and expected the first time).
Wow I pray to god that you are gold star lesbian cause your views on men are pretty deplorable :/
@cchris989 My formally acknowledge you as my biggest fan.
Don't be anxious. You both are in the same position. So, learn together. Experience together. Laugh together if the first night doesn't go as smooth as you had anticipated. Everybody's gotta start somewhere. He's going to be your partner. So, trust him, and be comfortable.
Congrats on getting married!
TY!!
No Prob!!
We were in exactly the same position than you guys, except for getting married 'n bit sooner.
So here are a few thoughts:
1. Don't expect too much from the first night. It's very painful (for both of you). We had sex for about six months before I came in her for the first time.
2. Don't try it on a bed the first time. A bed is too soft. Rather put a blanket on the carpet and do it missionary style. Or let him sit on a chair and climb onto him.
3. Truthfully, I would recommend not having sex, especially intercourse, the first night, at all. You two are going to be tired, still stressed about the whole day and a bit intoxicated... all a recipe for terrible sex! You have the rest of your lives to catch up.
4. Use a condom and lots of lube the first few times. Sex was very painful for me for the first few months.
5. Don't be self conscious about your body. It's a real turn off for a guy.
Enjoy!!
TY--a few of my friends recommended not having sex the first night. I really don't know if I can not do it lol but we will see it seems like great advice but my body tells me that's hard to do lol
Right now you really crave him! I know :-)!! But at the night you are just going to be so relieved that it's all over. Go into the night with NO expectations. If it happens, great! If you are too tired and relieved. Just tuck in and look forward to tomorrow morning... grrrrr!!
Not to over think it. Don't worry about anything (easier said then done but this is key). Don't worry about him seeing your body or it not being "perfect" or anything like that. He will be just as anxious as you are and self conscious also. The key for both of you is to be totally comfortable with each other (naked) and just enjoy the moment. Turn the brain off. Communicate also during sex, say what you like and don't like (same goes for him, don't be afraid to ask). Lots of people don't do this and then complain the sex is bad.
TY---I already know I need to work on this. I'm submissive by nature but by no means a pushover. I tend to be a bit on the quiet side but we enjoy a very healthy line of communication. I hope I'm open enough to do it in our bedroom. I really want our sex life to be vibrant and alive as much as our love
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!Be relaxed, do experience a lot of foreplay, and make sure he stimulates you enough that you don't have a painful experience ( or lubricant and oils) Be aware that most people will tell you that the person they loose virginity to is usually an awkward experience to say the least... but I am sure if there is love there you both will have love and patience on your side! best of luck
I think you should see a couple's counselor, preferably of your faith.
Be very patient use lubrication and lots and lots of foreplay. I mean LOTS
Foreplay is your friend. And lubricant, as someone else pointed out.
I don't see anything wrong with it. Lucky husband
Both of you need to adjust expectations of first time to very LOW, so be humorous about it and comment how typical this was. Then go at it again and again until - without even trying - it becomes more magical. I promise great things since you are in love. This is one of those practice, practice "sports" that pays off.
Don't be nervous. Be calm and cool. Your husband will have some idea about sex. Even if you don't know anything about sex don't worry. Decide whether you want to have protective sex sex or not. Keep lubricant and oil handy. there will be some bleeding. Have some warm water and a clean towel. Don't get ashamed to show him your naked body. Everything will go all right. First time sex is always special.
TY--it's funny I WANT to show him my naked body but at the same time I'm kinda nervous what he will think about it. I mean I know he'll like it but I can't help wondering will it be disappointing to him somehow like it's not what he's imagined? Stupid I know
The one who will marry you has seen you from outside (with clothes) , and he already knows about your skin color and texture. He also has good idea about your body proportions. When you present to him your body to him do it in a pleasant and confident way. Do it as if you are giving him a wonderful gift. Ultimately , he knows that your body is precious to you , no matter how it looks. All wives are nervous on their first day of sex. There are no exceptions. Even men feel very nervous. So you both are on the same level of nervousness. At least you have read a little bit about sex on gags , etc. So you have some understanding. And other people on gags have also give you good advice. You don't have to feel bad or guilty about anything. Try to satisfy him to the best of your abilities. Bear the pain during sex , and discomfort from bleeding. Look at the different sex positions on the internet and try to learn some of the exercises which you may get to use during sex. Fully cooperate.
My advice keep your expectations low and retry to have fun
TY--yes I don't want to have this idea that he'll be Prince Charming and I'll have twenty orgasms on my wedding night, as fun as that would be lol
Tape it!
That's going to be some seriously awkward af shit right there, and one day when you've recovered from the trauma, you'll look back and hopefully see the humor in it.
I don't really think I want to do this
advice is that don't worry and enjoy ur future marriage and sex life
I could advice let it to happen... all the best
Don't worry about it. . You will do great. .
I really respect your chastity and saving your virginity. .
I am 26 and still virgin.
TY and good luck to you !
"30 YO male virgin" LOL now I've heard everything
hun you where married a long time ago
you read the bible wrong
you could have had sex so long ago
you missed out go have sex with him right now
hun listen to me im telling you the truth you read the bible wrong you and him are already married
Thank you for your input but no , even if on the off chance you are right and we and millions others are reading it wrong, since we've waited this long two more months won't be a problem
okay hun no problem make it special okay
30 years a long time, but be calm and dont be hurry, may be its a bit painful but u be fine... just be easy and do practice slowly.
TY-yes I'm worried about us rushing because I'm really at the point I want to rip his clothes off lol. And seriously I know he wants to just shred mine whenever we are together so goongn slow will be a matter of discipline.
I want to rip his clothes off, This is the collection of sexual need from last 30 years, if you be patience and do it slowly and learn about sexual skill, you would regret why you virgin 30 years! LOL
Since no one brought this up... There is a possibility it is going to be painful when he first starts. If this happens relax your body DO NOT tense it will make it hurt more. Relax and the pain will stop and it will start to feel good. Their will be a little blood so it is best you put a towel under you. It may not last long or it could last for a while. Sex is different for everyone.
TY-yes I'm a bit concerned with the pain but not enough to let that stop me lol Thanks for mentioning relaxing more that's very useful
You might have terrible sex
try to last the foreplay time as much as u can... without cumming because as it's the first time ur husband may be so Erogenous... and don't be shy and kiss him hard :) good luck
use a lot of lube too
Don't stress about it too much. Just enjoy each others company for the first time around. Don't try to make anything happen other than you guys are happy and affectionate with each other. No point in worrying about anything else for your first experience together.
Not sure why you answered anonymous, your answer is sweet.
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