Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health Should I tell my boyfriend I used to be a stripper?
anotherone333 Xper 2
My junior year of college I was super low on funds and was considering stripping. My boyfriend at the time said he was fine with it and I knew a girl who did it so I decided to try it. I only did it for four months and at the end it ruined my relationship (which was already emotionally abusive) and the girl I started with tried to blackmail me. I have a lot of trauma from around that time. I’ve been with my current boyfriend for almost 2.5 years and I haven’t told him. He always talks about how strippers are trash and disgusting. We’ve talked about strip clubs before, so I’ve definitely had the chance. But I’m also bi and were planning a three-way. So he knows I’m semi-promiscuous. I’m also a student teacher. Obviously I’m a different person now than I was when it happened. I hated that time in my life and don’t want to talk or think about it. It was only four months and I never did any hard drugs or slept with anyone I met from the club. Is it worth telling him? I know his idea of me will change and he hates when I tell him about anything relating to my past with men. However, I did dance in my hometown and some people I still know, do know I was. I’m extremely scared of him finding out. I also think there’s a good chance he’ll break up with me. Or just ghost me forever. Do I tell him? If I should, what on Earth do I say?
Updates:
+1 y
Also- I’ve been so nervous about telling him I’ve literally been physically sick for weeks. I just feel like things aren’t going to be the same after and I really don’t want things to end. Is this a big deal? I feel like 4 months isn’t a long time but I think with how he feels towards strippers I think it’s gonna be bad.
+1 y
Okay so I told him earlier today around 2 (it’s 9:30pm now). When I told him he didn’t really respond a lot and he asked a few questions but we’ve been hanging out all day and it seems like it hasn’t had a huge impact. I’ll probably update this thread in a week and tell everyone how it’s going. Thanks for the encouragement, hopefully it all works about because I really care about him.
+1 y
Okay, so I told him. First day was rough but it’s a lot better now and he’s over it. He says it hasn’t really effected the way he sees me and we’re pretty much back to normal!
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What Girls & Guys Said
4 51I say let it go and forget about it. You did it for 4 months, not 4 years, and its not like you're stripping now and hiding it from him.
If he can't accept who you were or choices you made why should you accept him? Why should you pretend to be something you are not?
I mean, I don’t think I’m someone I’m not. I’m still the same person, I’ve grown a lot since then and I don’t associate with that part of my past anymore. But I know it is something I did and he deserves to know.
If he ask, be truthful. Otherwise, say nothing.
Communication is key in any relationship. Good luck.
If you’ve been together for a long time, you probably should tell her. He may not trust you if he finds out from someone else but he should also understand that it is difficult for you to tell him. If my girlfriend used to be a stripper I probably wouldn’t mind.
I think you should it may spice things up in the bedroom a little bit as long as your faithful he should be good
Fuck you sound like a classic dumb whore. Your boyfriend would be better off to be free of you and you can go back to the cock carousel.
Hell yes, and if he gets worked up, show him a bit of your old routine to calm him down if you know what I mean
If it was the other way around would you want to know?
No. We don’t talk about our past relationships a lot and I don’t mind that. All I care about is where we are at now. I know he’s had a troubling past in different ways than me.
Ehh, doesn’t matter unless you’re doing it now. Even then, it’s not a bad thing. Prob made more than me.
Re: Good, he should be happy to be with a hot chick.
It’s your past, if he brings it up... then maybe tell him.
If he doesn’t bring it up, don’t offer. Just enjoy each other to the fullest and it will never be a problem.
That being said, I think being a stripper is hot and I like that.
Only if you want to. You don't have to. It could always come up in conversation so you can wait until then.
It's better he hear it from you and not find out about it from somebody else. It's what you did, not who you are. If he is open to a threesome with you then he should not be judgmental and be happy you are willing to share in his fantasies. Good luck.
Thank you, this helped. I’m hoping he will be accepting.
Hope it goes well for you. I'm interested if hearing how your conversation goes if your willing to share.
If you want him to leave you sure tell him
No reason to tell him at all. It's in the past.
Many guys would prefer honesty, and if he finds out in the later stage he'll be really upset and feel like you cheated him, especially if he finds out after marriage or kids.
And yeah there's a chance of him leaving too.
But since he's open to a threesome, maybe he won't be that mad when you tell him.
Anyways, all the best.
And one more thing, every job has its own value. It's not fair for him to call strippers trash
I’m hoping he’ll be understanding.
Even if he wants to end the relationship, I know it will hurt at first, but I feel like, holding off the truth is selfish
All the best
That's great👍
Yes!
also, now that gay marriage is legal are you going to continue dating a man, or are you going to start dating a woman, just because women can now marry women, and men can now marry men I GUARANTEE there's NO SUCH THING AS BI
Better he finds out from you than someone else imao
How should I tell him? Should I wait until it comes up again?
Give him a demo then fess up
Oh lord lol
I know but it will be hard for him to be angry with you after a great show lol
i think you should.
no problem. i'm glad.
I’d just tell him