Was I technically raped?
He had an incorrect mindset about anal sex. The first time, I involuntarily yelped in pain and his anger and frustration shown in his voice when he said to me "it's anal! it's going to hurt!" (it was like "you're an idiot for not realizing that").
It became extremely painful, one of the worst pains I ever felt in my life and when I told him to take it out (I was clear enough, he could hear me). I could hear the pain and panic in my voice. He didn't take it out. He continued in a way he thought wouldn't be painful for me it seemed. I don't know exactly was going on in his mind. Regardless, it was still incredibly painful. He was completely on top of me, lying flat down and I couldn't do anything. I can't remember exactly how long the pain lasted, only seconds but I still remember how severely painful it was in those seconds. The pain became more bearable so I didn't need him to stop anymore. Eventually, he did take it out, I think he got sick of me not being able to do it without me yelping and then, without asking me, went to put it inside of my vagina which is absolutely disgusting. When I told to take whatever he had already put in OUT he got angry at me and furiously got off me and rolled over on his side facing away from me. It was a really horrible night.
This is how it happened. I've been so confused ever since I typed out what happened. My friend told me that is technically rape and another friend who I spoke to told me it's flat-out rape.
I'm not traumatized or anything. I have that horrible memory and these feelings of confusion.
How would you feel if you're partner didn't stop when you asked them to? Would you feel guilty if you didn't stop when you were asked to?
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