Sexual Relationships
+1 y

What do I do with my hormones or his?

Just once I’d like him to want sex when I do! Every fucking time I plan to get dressed in lingerie he can’t or doesn’t feel good or loses his erection when I’m literally on top of him. Trust me the next 10 times he wants sex and I’m ok my body is off limits. I’m done! I’m done feeling like crap. I feel low. I’m so sick of these hormones driving me mad too! It would be the same as getting pretty for prom and having your date cancel. Tonight he has a good excuse but he always has an excuse. I try so hard not to get mad or upset but I’m just over it. It shouldn’t be this hard to have sex. I shouldn’t feel like crap half the time.
1 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • Jess: He may be incapable to having sex with you, every time you want to have sex. However, he should be capable of having sex most of the time that you want to. You say nothing about the frequency of when you initiate sex. How often do you do this? Does he have any physical or emotional limitations other than the ordinary? If I read you right, he is quite capable of having sex when he wants to, but not when you initiate it. That's BS, and it's likely a control issue. You have a reasonable expectation of him having good sex with you, the majority of the time you dress in lingerie and want it. That he looses his erection when you are on him speaks volumes. Unless you are expecting too much sex from him, which I doubt, he is not cooperating with you. The only way he should lose his erection when you are on top of him, is on rare occasions, or if he has a medical problem. And even if he loses his hard, he can eat you out. It looks very much like he is not being fair with you. Perhaps there needs to be some marriage counseling, to see what is going on. Or have his see a doctor, and see what his medical problem is.

    • Jess: here's your answer.

  • y'all need to see a doctor and a therapist. Does he have problems masturbating, or getting all the way hard when he's going after you?

    It could also be something as simple as using different detergents that irritate the skin. Before you start in in retaliation, maybe see what could be the matter with your love gun. You wouldn't be this upset if he wasn't important to you.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Sounds like you two are at cross purposes - oh, so you don't want sex when I do? Well, the next time you want sex then I won't want to. So there!

  • Serious Bummer Jesslin !!!

    I don't know what I'd do if I was in you position !!!

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What Girls & Guys Said

2 21

  • Does he know yet whether the issue is physiological or psychological? What does his urologist say?

    • Wow, most replies here are really awful advice. Don't listen to them.

  • That sounds awful! Maybe get some marital counseling and masturbate if you need immediate relief.

  • He should go to a urologist because it's not normal for a healthy young man to have issues staying hard

  • umm, we aren't wind up toys. you're obviously not as close to him as you think

  • Jess message me!

  • Doesn’t sound like you’re sexually compatible

  • Talk to him about it, I get that this his sex drive is different from yours but even if he's not in the mood in my opinion he should at least try and satisfy you, when you need/want him to.

    It's important for partners to satisfy each other emotionally and physically/sexually, even if he can't get hard he should still eat you out or do something to help ya out. Just my opinion on it.

  • Thats so sad if sex only has to come from one side 😞 the way i see it, if you pamper your girl and give her good foreplay? Wouldn't she be willing to give u more and better sex when u want it? 🤔🤔

  • I guess he doesn't like you being the aggressor in the relationship. Might be a turnoff to him.

  • Sounds like you both need to find some way of syncing your sex lives. Maybe try couples yoga... if he’s having erection issues I’m guessing it could be diet or age related. People are sexually active well into the end days of their lives. His issue may be medical

  • He needs to see a urologist. no excuses. if you have, see another. have him see a sex therapist of that fails
    He’s a young man and this should not be an issue Jess. so it’s medical or mental. but it’s not you. not at all Jess. i promise

  • Go and find a better model …..

  • Hmm sounds like you have a problem. I really don't know how good my advice will be considering that I've never experienced that exactly, but I'll do what I can.

    Maybe the best way is to be direct about it with him. Like tell him exactly what you told us. That you're done with feeling like this and that to make it work it has to change. Unless you think it's too harsh

  • Don't plan, do

  • Wow 😗

  • Whats his age and i think he might be having high cholestrol levels due which he is losing erection or some other medicine if he takes it regularly

  • You seem really frustrated take a breath then sit down and talk to him it just seem like you two aren't sexually compatible but you can get past this with communication tell him how you feel

  • Damn, so sad to hear that. Does Eric realise that this is a serious problem? Is he willing to solve this problem? It's possible to fix that but he should want it as well

  • Maybe you need a new guy.

  • Lol keep trying

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