Why do guys like it when their dicks hurt a girl during sex?

Whenever I tell my boyfriend to stop because it’s hurting me or to go slower it’s as if he gets more motivated and goes harder and faster! Or sometimes he asks me if it hurt. Why do they find it to be a compliment if their dicks hurt a girl?
Updates:
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Some guys****
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I gotta clear it up: if I say stop he stops. Sometimes I say stop but I still moan cause it hurts yet still feels good. So he just assumes I’m being pleasured. But if I tap him to stop, he stops or goes slower.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • This is obviously going over peoples head.

    No he doesn't get off from abusing you. When you say stop, he respects that and stops. The real turn on is he wants to do you so hard you'll be walking "side to side" like in the Ariana Grande song. Guys take it as a compliment because it shows sexual prowess and that's a big ego boost, WHICH IS NOT A BAD THING. If he was really hurting you and he didn't stop after you asked, THAT would be a bad thing. \

    Hope this helps.

    • Omg thank you! People are making it seem as if he’s an abuser and I’m like wow wait I never said that

    • True but she didn't explain it the best at first. Like I can see feeling some ego stroke if some rough, good sex, that she enjoyed, she was walking funny after., But the difference is I'd prefer it like all be pleasure for her and I guess I'm a gentleman, but wouldn't like knowing she was in pain with the pleasure during sex. Like my preference would be she enjoys it and pleased, but after the sex from the rough fucking, she may feel sore after from the pounding, but not during it and she liked or was fine with the soreness. And on the otherhand, I kind of wished chicks had an ego in the same way,, it kind of would be hot for a woman that's able to make me sore from having a strong pussy and going hard and had the ego stroke from that too with me being sore as well from her going hard on top. I love to dominate at times, but I get bored easily, I'm competitive, but for example, here's a metaphor. If I'm playing someone in ping pong, it may be cool a first few times if I dominate and win 21-0 and no challenge. But after awhile it gets boring pretty fast. I like someone that can give it back to me and relay back and forth and right there score to score with me and maybe beat me or could. It's not for pc reasons for sure, but equality sex is more fun to be than lopsided, I dominate or my cock always owns pussy. It's pretty hot if a chick has a pussy or skill to where she can ravage a man's cock back

  • its a little confusing from what you wrote. it may be a miscommunication that if you say "it hurts" and moan, his brain says "yea, more". so talk and try to make adjustment.

    It may be he is more thnking about what makes him feel good and not you, but doesn't sound like the case as he does adjust.

    • your root question is, we (or some) don't want to hurt you. Some may want to if there is something "masochistic" about that person where they want to inflict pain, or he's wanting to pay you back for hurting him (e. g." I'll get you back for that bitch session earlier), which of course is bad. He should be focused on pleasing you while pleasing himself

    • Yeah my question isn’t why my boyfriend does what he does, I know our dynamic. My question is more like do guys like knowing that they hurt?

    • maybe it is a bit of a complement that we are able to, makes us think we are big. But I would say no, I don't want to inflict pain.

Most Helpful Girls

  • It is hard to differentiate between moans on pleasure and pain... I have had a few conversations with my friends with benefits before, basically that feel that they are doing the right thing if we are moaning. But they also say it is hard for them to tell the difference between pain and pleasure.

  • your guys sounds like a dick. Or at the very least a sadist.
    My guess is that the "compliment" idea is from assuming he must have a big dick to inflict that pain. But in my book, he IS a big dick.

    • he probably doesn't and is definitely insecure and an asshole. I think when guys do stuff to feel dominant like that, it's compensation for something internally

    • in reading your update, thats in direct contrast to your initial statement... "Whenever I tell my boyfriend to stop because it’s hurting me or to go slower it’s as if he gets more motivated and goes harder and faster!"

    • Because that’s what he does if I say it and still moan. It can hurt but I still moan. He doesn’t stop unless I legit stop moaning and firmly say stop or give him my tap out tap, if I just say slower or stop while still seeming pleasured he doesn’t.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • you might not want to stay with him, he sounds like an abusive prick. He kind of has a rapey mindset actually. Sometimes girls like to feel sore after rough sex, that they enjoy and consent to. But that's one thing. You aren't enjoying it and he doesn't care, that's a big red flag. Sounds like he's insecure and feels he's so manly and a tough guy being rough to where it hurts you. I don't think it's best being with a dude like that.

  • I think there is a clear communication problem here , if you give mixed signals I would expect confusion. You say it hurts but it feels good and you wonder why he is confused? Lol

    • I can be enjoying sex and say “go slower” but he sees me enjoying it so he stays on his pace or goes faster cause he thinks he’s doing a good job, which he is but its hurting so I’d like him to stop. I have to literally stop enjoying it and say No no stop and then he does it and then I have to get back into it...

    • Hun , I think you just need to tell him this.. teaching your partner how to be better at pleasing you is part of any intimate relationship and it’s something we all go through with every new partner. How I’d handle it as you is to reassure him when he is doing what you like the way you like it :)

  • *Some* guys. I don't.

  • Because they are evil, that's a very obvious answer.

    • You sound weird like your man.

  • How much does it even hurt?

    • A lot. Like there’s a lot of pressure

    • As much as a kick in the nuts?

    • Well I’ve never been kicked in the nuts... I doubt it though

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  • A lot of it is power, the feeling of dominating her and being in total control. There are obviously limits to it but that's where a lot of guys get off.

  • It means their dick is big. Ego boost

  • Some idiots hope it will give them a Biggus Dickus reputation.

  • It's probably making him feel big.

    • Do you do that? Or feel complimented if a girl says that?

    • Nah... I've actually measured myself and found that I'm above average sized. I focus on my partner loving my cock, not ramming her with it so she's scared of it

    • I know right. It doesn’t feel good when it obviously hurts. I honestly prefer smaller

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  • I guess cause moans of pleasure and moans of pain can sound really similar xD

  • It doesn't, it actually scares me because I'm doing something wrong.

  • get him charged

    • Charged?

    • with cops and court, a lot of my guy friends have court cases because of this kind of stuff

    • just have proof

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  • Sounds like an abuser

    • ... That type of hyperbole is not helpful to women dealing with actual abusers

    • Not an hyperbole. Like I said, he sounds like an abuser.

  • Power.

  • Hows does he enjoy by hurting his gurl

  • Well sounds like your boyfriend as an asshole.

  • I don't.

  • Would you pm sometime I'd like to talk to you myself if it's OK with you

  • rough, hard is always best but till its comfortable. your boyfriend is a true asshole.

  • Maybe some, I like if my dick causes pleasure.

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