Why do guys micro-cheat (watch porn, ogling at other women, liking InstaThots) when they have a wife/girlfriend?
Anonymous
When a guy micro-cheats, I’m not talking about cheating because I noticed so many girls tolerating this bs. It results in the woman’s confidence going down, unhealthy or toxic relationship, and tension.
So, is there a justifiable reason that a guy might do this like if then wife/girlfriend is fat and lets herself go and he has told her many times? Or she’s actually a mean bitch?
Or is the guy just selfish and ungrateful?
Updates:
+1 y
The comments are disappointing. Porn is disgusting and results in lower relationship satisfaction.
Why can't people accept polyamoury? It is better than the cheating concept
0010
Asker
+1 y
Umm what? Maybe you can... I wouldn’t have the emotional or mental capacity to do so.
AmeerX
+1 y
But it is still better that couples make it clear in advance then to cheat. If they can accept it then at least they would not have this conflict later on. And I completely understand it is not for everyone
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
I disagree, polyamoury lacks close emotional bonds, exclusivity privilages, health saftey, and is more expensive, monogamy is superior.
Show All Show Less
okeydoke
+1 y
@TheSpaceGnome None of you understand what polyamory is. I’m a polyamorous person.
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
@okeydoke I understand what it is just fine.
okeydoke
+1 y
@TheSpaceGnome If you think it lacks close emotional bonds and safety, then you clearly don’t.
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
@okeydoke Yes, I do. There is no way in hell having sex eith multiple partners can be made safe because keeping track of them would be unrealistic, and as for close emotional bonds, 3 is a crowd when it comes to mentally stimulating conversation, and I barely have time for one person, whom I prefer is the possesive, overly affectionate clingy type. If she isn't giving the evil eye to any girls thinking about stealing me away, then it ain't love :)
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
@okeydoke basically I wouldn't feel close to anyone who has backups
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
@okeydoke plus physical touch is part of closeness, i can't cuddle 2 people at once, not effectively.
okeydoke
+1 y
@TheSpaceGnome Polyamory and being part of a triad aren’t the same thing. And needing jealousy to feel secure in a relationship is ludicrous. Polyamory similarly doesn’t mean you’re sleeping around indiscriminately. . Like I said, you clearly don’t know what you’re talking about.
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
"And needing jealousy to feel secure in a relationship is ludicrous" Inept wording since it's really not a matter of needing jealousy but rather needing possessiveness as a practical saftey measure. Jealousy is wanting something someone else has, possesiveness is keeping whats yours and not letting anyone take it from you. If a woman doesn't value me enough to get up in arms over the idea of someone else taking her place, then I'm being seen as expendable, replacable, ie it's not love, and sex sithout love is boring, unarousing, and risky.
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
Polyamoury is having multiple regular sexual partners, anything else I added is stuff that would happen as a result of that. And there is no way to have love with polyamoury without sacrificing so much time that you lose yourself. Between hobbies, a job, eating, sleeping, and tending to the emotional and physical needs of one woman, thats the whole day spent, thats the full 24 hours. Then what? I say its not your turn today? how the hell is that supposed to work? it could only be made fair if she had multiple partners too, and then she would pick who she wants as the others (because me picking would be controlling), and then i'd have to trust them?, and let me tell you thats not gonna happen, I'm not going to trust her other partner/s that his/her other partners didn't give him/her an std, and what if its a guy and he gets her pregnant? what then? I'll tell you what, I'm out, I'm not interested in being around kids (which is why I want a girlfriend who doesn't want any), especially ones that aren't mine.
TheSpaceGnome
+1 y
Every hobby I enjoy is either solo or is done best with 1 other person, I want someone who loves fighting games and wants to make stuff with me like the nerdforge youtube channel does, and I don't want a third person in my bed. Conversations that are enjoyable have no more than 2 people, including myself, this is an intellectual thing, an emotional thing, and a conversation flow thing. So tell me how, how is it possible to even have time every day for multiple people? Because I've done the math, and assuming by some miracle I found more than one single nerd/gamer/otaku who likes anime, difficult video games, doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs, or want kids, and also liked me, how the hell and I going to have quality time with TWO OF THEM? if its not at the same time (which as a pointed out, would not work out)
s2firestarYoda
+1 y
That is neither micro nor macro cheating.
Stop inventing new words.
0100
Asker
+1 y
Spot the cheater
s2firestar
+1 y
Watching porn is cheating? Are you fucking mad?
s2firestar
+1 y
I mean... you should be ashamed of yourself. You have so many personal issues that you cannot see through your own insecurities. Let me put it this way: If you have not the libido to match your man, be glad he only watches porn.
oncplYoda
+1 y
I am married but watch porn. Not alone or secretly, my wife knows and accompanies me. She is of the view that it partner wants to watch porn, better to give company instead of getting angry. As regards ogling, it is also not micro-cheating. A person can't be blind if it has a partner (wife/husband or boyfriend/girlfriend). Looking at someone is in fact appreciation.
1000
okeydokeExplorer
+1 y
I’ve had multiple girlfriends who also watch porn. Sometimes with me or alone. Don’t project your insecurities onto other people.
0000
Asker
+1 y
I can if I want and if a guy doesn’t like that he can leave.
okeydoke
+1 y
That’s true. We would, hypothetically, be entirely incompatible.
EyesOfGodXper 7
+1 y
Can we not admire what we precieve as beautiful? Obviously if the guy is checking out other girls, his girl is just a tied me over girl. If the guy was really into her they wouldn't look at other girls. Then in some cases the girls they look at are the ones they want to fuck but his girl is the one they want to marry or be with.
0000
GedariaMaster
+1 y
This can happen to any one. Everyone view porn and look at the opposite sex or the they are attracted to. Even just walking down the street any of us can do this. I'm not saying it's right or wrong it just happens..
0000
Meatunnel69Yoda
+1 y
Lol micro cheat.
0000
Glasgow55Xper 6
+1 y
Here we go. Another set of constraints aimed at stopping guys being guys, Christians being Christians, Santa Claus, black-boards, using the wrong fucking gender pronoun etc., etc. This is all going to end badly. It's all fucking mental.
0000
Asker
+1 y
Okay so porn makes men men? Haven’t you heard about NoFap or semen retention? How that improves your mental state? Self-control is very masculine, which is why this society is so degenerate since it lacks a lot of it.
SirJohn42Xper 6
+1 y
Look guys dont consider porn cheating or glancing at a cute girls butt. But I know it affects a womans mind. Makes them feel bad. Porn is cheating especially when I guy cums to porn and denies his girl sex. Porn is just plain evil. Women feel inadequate if they can't please their man.
1000
Asker
+1 y
THANK YOU!! So glad to hear a man understand women’s minds. I hope more men think like this.
SirJohn42
+1 y
Well I know porn is a hard they to crack for us guys as well. But we should know better. a lot just dont want to change.
SirJohn42
+1 y
Thing
heavymetalbrothaXper 5
+1 y
Nature. its not even a thought and with those your not going to honestly cross paths with them anyway.
0000
COMMODOREIIMaster
+1 y
Lol thats not cheating.
1000
COMMODOREII
+1 y
Not my experience about the porn. My exgfs lived watching it and invited me to watch it with them. Lol
JuxtaposeMaster
+1 y
If she takes care of me, I won't *want* porn.
3000
TwalliMaster
+1 y
My girlfriend doesn't live with me. When she's here I only watch porn with her.
0000
Asker
+1 y
I guess that’s okay...
TallAnonMaster
+1 y
Everyone has a different definition of cheating and mine does not include watching porn. I see no problem with it and if I date a woman who thinks it is, we can break up.
0000
shanshuExplorer
+1 y
Yeah like women don't admire/ogle mustly men or men with six packs or a man in uniform while they are in relationships, take your head out of your ass and stop thinking it's all one sided
0100
DeltaCharlieEchoXper 6
+1 y
It isn’t cheating. Only the insecure believe it is.
0000
GuanfeiMaster
+1 y
Or ffs could you stop making up stupid words to blame shit on men constantly?
0000
Asker
+1 y
I’m not a feminist but porn is a problem in our society especially for men and is proven to destroy relationships. Did you even watch the skit? And this word is common, even women are guilty of this.
NazgolYoda
+1 y
Because they're sexual beings and have a higher drive more than women
Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
What Girls & Guys Said
15 86Why can't people accept polyamoury? It is better than the cheating concept
Umm what? Maybe you can... I wouldn’t have the emotional or mental capacity to do so.
But it is still better that couples make it clear in advance then to cheat. If they can accept it then at least they would not have this conflict later on. And I completely understand it is not for everyone
I disagree, polyamoury lacks close emotional bonds, exclusivity privilages, health saftey, and is more expensive, monogamy is superior.
@TheSpaceGnome None of you understand what polyamory is. I’m a polyamorous person.
@okeydoke I understand what it is just fine.
@TheSpaceGnome If you think it lacks close emotional bonds and safety, then you clearly don’t.
@okeydoke Yes, I do. There is no way in hell having sex eith multiple partners can be made safe because keeping track of them would be unrealistic, and as for close emotional bonds, 3 is a crowd when it comes to mentally stimulating conversation, and I barely have time for one person, whom I prefer is the possesive, overly affectionate clingy type. If she isn't giving the evil eye to any girls thinking about stealing me away, then it ain't love :)
@okeydoke basically I wouldn't feel close to anyone who has backups
@okeydoke plus physical touch is part of closeness, i can't cuddle 2 people at once, not effectively.
@TheSpaceGnome Polyamory and being part of a triad aren’t the same thing. And needing jealousy to feel secure in a relationship is ludicrous. Polyamory similarly doesn’t mean you’re sleeping around indiscriminately. . Like I said, you clearly don’t know what you’re talking about.
"And needing jealousy to feel secure in a relationship is ludicrous" Inept wording since it's really not a matter of needing jealousy but rather needing possessiveness as a practical saftey measure. Jealousy is wanting something someone else has, possesiveness is keeping whats yours and not letting anyone take it from you. If a woman doesn't value me enough to get up in arms over the idea of someone else taking her place, then I'm being seen as expendable, replacable, ie it's not love, and sex sithout love is boring, unarousing, and risky.
Polyamoury is having multiple regular sexual partners, anything else I added is stuff that would happen as a result of that. And there is no way to have love with polyamoury without sacrificing so much time that you lose yourself. Between hobbies, a job, eating, sleeping, and tending to the emotional and physical needs of one woman, thats the whole day spent, thats the full 24 hours. Then what? I say its not your turn today? how the hell is that supposed to work? it could only be made fair if she had multiple partners too, and then she would pick who she wants as the others (because me picking would be controlling), and then i'd have to trust them?, and let me tell you thats not gonna happen, I'm not going to trust her other partner/s that his/her other partners didn't give him/her an std, and what if its a guy and he gets her pregnant? what then? I'll tell you what, I'm out, I'm not interested in being around kids (which is why I want a girlfriend who doesn't want any), especially ones that aren't mine.
Every hobby I enjoy is either solo or is done best with 1 other person, I want someone who loves fighting games and wants to make stuff with me like the nerdforge youtube channel does, and I don't want a third person in my bed. Conversations that are enjoyable have no more than 2 people, including myself, this is an intellectual thing, an emotional thing, and a conversation flow thing. So tell me how, how is it possible to even have time every day for multiple people? Because I've done the math, and assuming by some miracle I found more than one single nerd/gamer/otaku who likes anime, difficult video games, doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs, or want kids, and also liked me, how the hell and I going to have quality time with TWO OF THEM? if its not at the same time (which as a pointed out, would not work out)
That is neither micro nor macro cheating.
Stop inventing new words.
Spot the cheater
Watching porn is cheating? Are you fucking mad?
I mean... you should be ashamed of yourself. You have so many personal issues that you cannot see through your own insecurities. Let me put it this way: If you have not the libido to match your man, be glad he only watches porn.
I am married but watch porn. Not alone or secretly, my wife knows and accompanies me. She is of the view that it partner wants to watch porn, better to give company instead of getting angry.
As regards ogling, it is also not micro-cheating. A person can't be blind if it has a partner (wife/husband or boyfriend/girlfriend). Looking at someone is in fact appreciation.
I’ve had multiple girlfriends who also watch porn. Sometimes with me or alone. Don’t project your insecurities onto other people.
I can if I want and if a guy doesn’t like that he can leave.
That’s true. We would, hypothetically, be entirely incompatible.
Can we not admire what we precieve as beautiful? Obviously if the guy is checking out other girls, his girl is just a tied me over girl. If the guy was really into her they wouldn't look at other girls. Then in some cases the girls they look at are the ones they want to fuck but his girl is the one they want to marry or be with.
This can happen to any one.
Everyone view porn and look at the opposite sex or the they are attracted to. Even just walking down the street any of us can do this.
I'm not saying it's right or wrong it just happens..
Lol micro cheat.
Here we go. Another set of constraints aimed at stopping guys being guys, Christians being Christians, Santa Claus, black-boards, using the wrong fucking gender pronoun etc., etc. This is all going to end badly. It's all fucking mental.
Okay so porn makes men men? Haven’t you heard about NoFap or semen retention? How that improves your mental state? Self-control is very masculine, which is why this society is so degenerate since it lacks a lot of it.
Look guys dont consider porn cheating or glancing at a cute girls butt. But I know it affects a womans mind. Makes them feel bad. Porn is cheating especially when I guy cums to porn and denies his girl sex. Porn is just plain evil. Women feel inadequate if they can't please their man.
THANK YOU!! So glad to hear a man understand women’s minds. I hope more men think like this.
Well I know porn is a hard they to crack for us guys as well. But we should know better. a lot just dont want to change.
Thing
Nature. its not even a thought and with those your not going to honestly cross paths with them anyway.
Lol thats not cheating.
Not my experience about the porn. My exgfs lived watching it and invited me to watch it with them. Lol
If she takes care of me, I won't *want* porn.
My girlfriend doesn't live with me. When she's here I only watch porn with her.
I guess that’s okay...
Everyone has a different definition of cheating and mine does not include watching porn. I see no problem with it and if I date a woman who thinks it is, we can break up.
Yeah like women don't admire/ogle mustly men or men with six packs or a man in uniform while they are in relationships, take your head out of your ass and stop thinking it's all one sided
It isn’t cheating. Only the insecure believe it is.
Or ffs could you stop making up stupid words to blame shit on men constantly?
I’m not a feminist but porn is a problem in our society especially for men and is proven to destroy relationships. Did you even watch the skit? And this word is common, even women are guilty of this.
Because they're sexual beings and have a higher drive more than women
Stupidest label I've seen this week
Nope, it’s real, women can do it too
You're dillusional. And single for life
You’re saying you don’t “micro cheat”?