Why is my girlfriend rejecting intimacy with me?

[Anonymous]

Our relationship has been going very well. I wanted to get or get closer to her by some means. We are in long distance relationship. But she never tends to share anything I ask her what dress she wore she takes an pic and share. And I today I asked Lets bring deep intimacy as well. But she seemed like she dont want intimacy in our relationship. Which comes very off. An intimacy is needed for deeper bonds. But she doesn't wanna build. She keeps saying she's not used to intimacy. Is there an way to fix this intimacy thing? Like I do wanna get closer to each other by intimacy means. She says she is trying her best to be intimacy. But yeah I trying to pursue an deeper intimacy with her but I can't.

[Oliverlogan263]

Bro, she may just not be ready for that level of intimacy yet in a long distance relationship. Pushing her too fast could backfire and damage your connection. My advice would be:

- Respect her boundaries. Even if you're feeling intimate, going at her pace is important to make her comfortable.

- Talk to her openly about why she's hesitant. Reassure it's not about sex, you just want emotional closeness. Hear her concerns fully.

- Suggest smaller intimate acts like gentle touches or cuddling next time you're together to ease her into it slowly.

- Focus on quality time together doing fun stuff you both enjoy. Laughter and enjoyment build comfort.

- Compliment her personality and the non-physical things you adore about her. Intimacy is as much emotional as physical.

- Be patient dude! Rome wasn't built in a day. With understanding and trust over time, she'll likely open up more naturally.

For now I'd say back off directly asking for intimacy and let your actions show you respect her feelings. She'll come around when she's ready if you make her feel safe and cared for.

[Asker]

Well we do have kisses and cuddles sometimes we do even voice chat each other in calls. She do shares some stuff sometimes when I ask. Even wearing an dress and it seems like she doesn't want to share too much about her life. She even said she feels comfortable and open around me but I think she can't express my actions but only words._. I already have talked about her about this it seems like her exes never tried to be intimate to her thats why she is always saying "Im getting used to it little by little"

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, that definitely adds some context. If past relationships weren't very intimate with her, it makes sense she'd feel uncomfortable opening up fully. A couple things you could try: - Make sure she knows she can set the pace and say no at any time. Reassure her you don't expect anything, just want her to feel cared for. - Suggest taking intimacy super slow, like starting with just sharing more thoughts/feelings verbally before moving to physical affection. - Lead by example - be very open about your feelings for her to help her feel safe opening up too. - Plan low-pressure intimate activities like cooking together over video chat, giving each other "assignments" to share more each day. - Compliment the non-physical things she shares to encourage further openness. It's great you two are communicating. With patience and her comfort as the priority, hopefully over time she'll fully trust you and feel ready for more. Just keep reassuring her with your words and actions that she's safe with you. You've got this man!

[Asker]

Thank you for all of that actions and telling me that. I will surely try and I even told her about it. She seems to change sometimes she do share photos I see some improvements in her after all. Its more like an old engine and Im an mechanic trying to start it after so long years. But thank you for the advices.

[Oliverlogan263]

No problem man, happy I could offer some perspective! It's really cool that you're trying to understand her better and give her the space she needs. That's the best thing you can do as her boyfriend. Treating her with patience and respect like you are will go a long way in building the trust for a deeper connection over time. I'm glad to hear she seems to be opening up more - that engine is starting to turn over! Just keep being there for her without pressuring, and let her know how much you care in meaningful ways. You obviously really care about her, so just stay positive. This will only make your bond stronger. Keep me posted on how things develop - I'm rooting for you guys! You've got the right approach, so I'm sure if you keep at it with kindness, she'll keep coming around. You've got this bro.

[RavVid]

Intimacy is not something you need prior experience in between guys and gals. It just happens.

Sorry I think you are flogging a dead horse. Seems to me she is blocking. Either she is very self contained/isolated or having you as a boyfriend is a box she has ticked off without really being interested in you.

You can't force this stuff and i would question if you should continue.

[MissStrawberry912]

First thing is making sure she is comfortable and trust you. We can’t expect anyone even our friends and partner to open up right away. Maybe she has a hard time being vulnerable with a difficult upbringing and such. So don’t force. Be gentle that you wanna get to know her better and connect deeper but only when she’s ready. And asked her if there’s any reason that’s making it hard for her to open up. Be loving and go by her pace.

[RoseySarah]

I agree but really sounds more like she wants you as a online boyfriend in name only not really close to her just someone there till she finds someone closer Ever met up?

[Billlewis]

So you've never had any penetrative sex with her?

[Asker]

Not that kind of intimacy. Im talking about sharing information about life or sharing dresses which she is wearing and stuff. Not that deep xd

[Billlewis]

Okay, now I understand.

[Lisia]

What kind of intimacy do you mean?

[JacobJordan]

you can't force it. it has to happen naturally. you also can't logic it. just exist and it will come in time

[SolitarySolace]

She's probably getting intimacy from someone else

[RedInnocent68]

She’s not that into you. Sorry. Don’t wait around. She won’t.

[DextroShade]

If you have any self-respect this is a deal-breaker. Let her know in no uncertain terms that if she won't be intimate you will stop wasting your time on her and find someone who will. Don't simp for girls who don't like you like that.