A guy that doesn't masturbate?

So I've been in this relationship for a few years now and we're both Christians and mutually decided to wait until we're married to have sex. I'm a virgin but he isn't... I admit sometimes I'm sick of waiting and I tell my boyfriend that who by the way obviously has more will power than me because he'll say no to any advances I make and tells me that I'd just regret it and that he's doing it for us... So here is where my question comes from. I am not naive I don't know why my boyfriend acts like I am. He says he doesn't ever masturbate but I don't even believe there is a guy that doesn't! I've had boyfriends before him at least they were honest with me haha! What guy takes a shower for like 45 minutes if He's not doing that? I know he's not cheating so he's not rejecting me because he's not interested. I just don't like the fact that he's being a liar about such a petty thing.
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I'd appreciate any feedback especially from guys, what do you think? Are there any guys that really don't masturbate? I don't understand his mentality at all, he's too mysterious!
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I guess there are probably a few guys who don't masturbate. I'm sure it has happened, but I REALLY doubt it. More likely he has a hard-core religious upbringing so he feels all guilty about sex.

    Religion REALLY messes people up about sex. He probably goes months at a time without ever masturbating, he builds up the desire strongly until he can't take it anymore, then he snaps and jacks off. Then afterward he feels so guilty he thinks he'll burn in hell for all eternity because of what he's done and he prays for forgiveness and swears he'll never do it again.

    ..then 6 months later he does it again.

    I don't mean to insult your religion, but the biggest factor with religious guys and sex is usually GUILT.

    The most likely reason he won't admit he masturbates is because he is trying to convince himself that this time he really won't. He is lying to himself as much as you. I don't think this is about you, you need not feel betrayed or hurt.

    A lot of people have deep issues about sex and shame and guilt and all that sh*t, etc...

    ...but that is total guess work. I don't know the guy at all, maybe there is a totally different reason. Or maybe he really doesn't. I have talked to guys who said they underwent some monk-type training and that after a year their sex drive just went away.

  • there are some males who do not masturbates.But in his case I can not judge him. He is propably telling the truth or probably not lying to you but rather shy to admit it to you.May be you should let him know that it is okay to let his secrect out to you knowing that you will honor it, by letting him know that you masturbate as well. I am a christian .I am happily avirgin and will not have sex until I am married, so yeah I do masturbate. Many beautiful girls have ask me if I ever masturbate before,but I shy away from the question and say no.knowing fully well I masturbate and I enjoy it.So I can understand his situation so go easy on him.Okay

    • Well I'm not meaning to be too hard on him or anything, its just that there's been a lot that's happened and it has been a few years almost four now and it just seemed odd to me that of all things that is what he wouldn't really answer after everything else we've talked about. But I don't know I plan on leaving alone for his shower fun I just wanted some opinions from a third party kind of thing you know?

    • Yes I understand.I think you should put him in the comfort seat by first letting him know that you masturbate.the reasons why you love it etc and he might be open to response to back favourably. because I won't admit that I masturbate to just anyone unless they are sincere and open to me that the masturbate as well because there we both have something in common we like. I have a special female friend who I comfortably share my masturbation habits with and she does the same with me.

Most Helpful Girls

  • He may be ashamed of it.

    Or maybe it's something he's trying not to do because he feels like it's what's right.

    I'd just keep going along with it. Don't burst his bubble. It'll come out sooner or later.

    Or, just straight up ask him about it.

    OR, MAYBE, he really doesn't.

    But I highly doubt that.

  • Ms Lady,your a christian right? Trust is important in a marriage and if you can't or don't believe your future husband when he say he not masturbating,you got trust issues.He probably trying to do it GOD'S WAY! Good Luck and God Bless!

  • Maybe he thinks you will judge him if you know that he masturbates? Or maybe he really doesn't masturbate. I had one guy friend who didn't do it at all, he just didn't get any pleasure from it.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • If he says he doesn't and he seems that adamant about waiting until marriage, take him at his word. Not every man masturbates all of the time. I went through a phase a few months ago where I gave it up for a couple of months. The temptation was strong and it eventually got the best of me but I wanted to try it and see what it was like.

  • I won't say I've never done it, but I don't do it when I have a partner... And as for the shower thing I can spend up to two hours having a shower because I have an unusual routine and I love just standing in and zoning out.

  • any guy that claims to NOT masturbate or has NEVER masturbated is a freaking liar. and the same goes for girls too.

  • Poor guy. It sounds like he might be going through the same thing I did in high school. For a long time (I figure two years at the very least) I didn't masturbate. I was pretty religious at the time and it brought me a lot of shame and guilt. I was constantly torn between blind obedience to my faith and really needing to rub one out.

    I think only religious guilt might be one of the only forces strong enough to actually make someone deny their natural impulses. Fortunately I saw reason and started questioning my beliefs and the church's arcane doctrine. I ended up renouncing religion and became an atheist and it was the best decision I've ever made.

  • I don't see how that could be pulled off either? Next time he's in the shower for that long you should slide open that shower curtain and see exactly what he's doing. THEN if you really want to move to the next step and catch him, jump in there with him. lol :)

    • Oh em gee! Haha!!!! That would be too awkward hahahahaha! I open the cutain and then a awkward silence takes over or gets mad.... I don't even know what he'd do!

    • If you got ballsy and hopped in there and took over for him I can GUARANTEE you'd get what you want. ;) Guaranteed...