Sexual Relationships
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Can guys still cum fast even when they have slow sex?

I want to have a hookup... but I'm worried the guy will only last for 10 seconds because he won't care and just wants to cum. So if we do slow and gentle sex, could he still do that? I noticed that guys always thrust extra fast for a minute or 2 right b4 they cum.

Or if we had slow sex, and mixed in some hard thrusts occasionally could he still cum fast?
Yep
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Nope
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+1 y
I'm talking about a hookup, who could not care about me, not a bf!!!
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People your answers aren't helping or even descriptive...
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Well, there is a lot more to us cumming than the thrusting. The thrusting is more involved with keeping our cocks hard because the movement over our cock head and the feeling of our shafts being massaged keeps the blood flowing into the penis keeping it hard, and also encourages the production of semen/cum. But, depending on the guy and how much control he has over the intense feeling of pleasure this all has on us, some of us can prolong the outcome for longer, either because of training/practice, or our brain during intercourse is more focused on other things besides orgasm-ing, like making you orgasm or enjoying the overall feeling and experience of the sexual pleasure. We aren't as complicated as women (I don't think) when it comes to cumming, but we are capable of control to a point and it's not always stokes and there she blows. I've had it where I was having intercourse and I didn't even cum, and we did it for a while. Also, I've had it where I can cum, and then, if she's evil (in a good way) and keeps going at me, I got hard again like right away and then I didn't cum again, but enjoyed every bit of the experience and was hard throughout.

    With a hookup, it's kind of hard to predict what he's all about by way of sexual experience and performance. As well, where his head would be at during and if he just wanted to get off and not really be interested in your wants/needs/desires. That's why, casual sex is kind of hit or miss if you are with new partners. I wouldn't go into the first time with too much expectations. That usually ends in disappointment on either end. But go into the experience with an open mind, and in the moment without too much thought as to what's going to happen. Try not to plan out that you want it to be earth-shattering. In my experience, the most intense sexual experiences I've had, is when my inhibitions and expectations are lowered and I'm going into the experience with the idea that I'm going to enjoy myself and enjoy her body and keep it fun and open and make sure that I pay attention to what she wants. Once you get more comfortable with someone and you understand what each other's reactions and wants are during, then you can concentrate more on extending the experience and delving deeper into your personal wants and desires and trying to experiment more with one another, pushing each other's boundaries and limits of sexual bliss per say.

    • Only rarely have I experienced times with a casual partner that I've been able to push sexual boundaries and keep myself going, because the excitement of a new partner that I'm really sexually attracted to is sometimes a bit overwhelming for me to avoid cumming faster than I would like.

  • Yes. That's where a half hour of oral sex ON YOU comes into play before he mounts up. Expect it and don't spread 'em unless he does it.

    • I want to cum from sex, but your idea isn't half bad.

    • Or I could do the inverse, slow sex and then bj or handjob on him to finish him off.

    • Here's how that works. It is said that a girl is more likely to come from oral than intercourse. It is also said that while my orgasm may last just several seconds, yours may last much longer, like even 30. When you feel you are approaching orgasm from oral, have him quickly mount up. You will come quickly and he can drive as hard and cum as fast as he wants. That may well extend your orgasm or at least the satisfying "over run" until he cums. Oral really is the key here. It's why I am a short wound and a quick trigger, I get good reviews.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • One way to solve that is to have oral sex instead of sexual intercourse and to pleasure each other as separate events. Whenever you want, have him pleasure you until you orgasm or multiple orgasm or are satisfied. Whenever he wants, you pleasure him until he cums and orgasms. When being pleasured each of you is able to take as long as you each need to reach orgasm. When you're pleasuring him, he can cum after 10 seconds. When he's pleasuring you, you can come after 10 minutes or whatever it takes. Squirting and multiple orgasms may be in the cards.

    • How does he only last ten seconds for oral?

    • You said above that he only lasts 10 seconds. I presume that was just an example of cumming quickly, so I used the same example. How long he takes to cum is mostly dependent on him, but with foreplay it might not take very long. My guy watches some porn before we start and usually takes less than five minutes to cum in the mornings when I'm pleasuring him. If he doesn't cum in ten minutes or so, we take a break have him watch some more porn and try again half hour later. Oral isn't just about sucking and licking. You also stroke it and have him stroke it. Talk dirty to him, beg for cum, tell him things he likes to hear, etc. I enjoy swallowing and he likes that. I actually do very little sucking, licking and stroking. I let him do most of that himself. I do vigorously suck and lick his cock after I swallow his cum. I like doing that and he likes it too.

    • Great description, thanks!

  • I think it has to do with the guys discipline and if he's had sex or jerked off recently. But you still have to put effort into choosing your hookups to get an idea if the guy actually cares about your pleasure or at least his reputation as a good lover.

  • Make him cum mouth hand or vag thereafter he lasts longer each time

    Alcohol makes him last longer

    Rubbers make him less sensitive

    Lubes can prolong the fun, less friction and some desensitize

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What Girls & Guys Said

6 38

  • A guy who cums too fast is likely to cum too fast regardless of the scenario, unless he works on trying to hold back. Many guys are more than capable of handling the pace without cumming too fast, so I think you're over thinking this.

    • I'm saying the guy might not care about lasting long.

    • He might not but then he also might care. The reason that he might care is because he will care about putting in a good performance, because of his ego, and he will also care about maximising the value of the experience. If a guy cums in 10 seconds then he's had 10 seconds of pleasure and most of us want a lot more than that.

  • Having sex is like running a mile, you get sweaty, you get tired and you need to pace yourself. there's really no descriptive way of answering this question aside from the fact that it depends on the kind of guy he is.

  • Yes slow sex can make him cum fast as well. You need to just tell him you want him to last long and he'll make that happen. Or have him eat you out or finger you. Or even better, where you at? I'll go all night with ya 😉 Haha

  • definitely some... most can

  • I tend to come faster from slow sex. What energy is put into physical motion is spent into intensity instead. It works much better this way for me.

  • There are so many variables in how a guy comes. Some of them are as follows: Intensity of passion, sensitivity, some condoms are thinner and conduct heat and sensation more ( nothing beats bare but only if protected somehow and if you know sexual history, how recently he's come prior to this, how often he's had sex,

  • Of course he could. You want a hookup. There's no emotion involved in that. What's his reason to try to wait? He has none. You'll see him once in your life and you'll be done. In a relationship, with feelings attached, things are different. I just don't get why people can't realize this.

  • In general, yes, but not always. Personally, I like the feeling of sex more than I like the feeling of ejaculation, so I always try to hold out as long as the girl I'm with can handle. And I do this by slowing down any time I get close.

    However, it doesn't always work. I was having anal sex with a girl who hadn't done it before, for example. Slow is not the word for it - there was no thrusting at all other than the steady but gradual progression up her ass. After about ten minutes I was only about halfway in - not a single thrust, but I still felt the urge to cum. I had to stop completely and desperately start thinking of math and pineapples (my go-to thoughts for delaying ejaculation).

    But the point is that slow sex alone isn't enough. It really depends on the guy. If he wants the sex to last a while, it's much more likely that it will. But if he's more interested in quickly adding a number to his 'tally,' he probably won't last very long..

    • Great detailed answer.

  • last hook up only sex i had lasted all night so i shouldn't worry. you know its not a mans main aim during sex to just cum as fast as possible dont you?

  • It all really depends on how much excitement he has, regardless of how long or slow the sex is. I think this is what a lot of women miss. When you're really excited, you feel an intense inner need for ejaculation. When you're just willing to do the sex and happy but not exactly excited, it's a different outcome (pardon the pun).

    However, slow sex makes male orgasms a lot longer and stronger when they do cum. I know it does for me. Delaying ejaculation several times creates an intense bang.

  • Some guys last longer than others. And it sometimes even varies varies from 1 fuck to the next. I can sometimes erupt in 3 minutes (ie a quickie and am in a hurry), sometimes takes an hour or more. That's just a hazard and an unknown when fucking someone new for the first time. What I do is simply stop (assuming I'm in a position of control and not in something like cowgirl) fucking for a few seconds when I feel my load about to shoot (the sensation starts about 10 seconds before I actually do). Not everyone can do this, it takes practice and discipline (as an illustration, try jilling off and simply pull your fingers away when you are getting close, most don't want to or can't stop). Sometimes as a backup plan I jackoff before meeting up (fastest way to cum = don't cum in a month beforehand). If all else fails and you get a minuteman just wait a few minutes when he can get hard again and go again. The 2nd cum usually takes far longer.

  • A guy can realize before he is going to ejaculate. If he pauses for few seconds, the ejaculation can be late. He can stop or he can change positions to slow down.

    And for you, take a course on foreplay for him. If he knows foreplay you can cum three four times before he ejaculates.

  • In the beginning of a relation it happended a few times that the guy came in the first seconds when entering the vagina. Brrr. Not good for me, Not good for him.

  • come see me you get all you need plus more babe

  • If a guy is gonna be done in 10 seconds, then the problem isn't the type of sex it's a problem with the guy himself.

  • it doesn't matter if your hooking up with somebody or he is your boyfriend. the guy should never be selfish and cum fast. the focus should be always on the girl. at least that's how I do it. he should start slow with foreplay build the intensity tease you as much as he can make u cum with his mouth and finger a couple of times before he even enter his dick than slow twitch until he learns what it is of feeling to stay inside after all of that. whenever he is about to cum he needs to slow down and do something else until that hype of over excitement go away and than continue. that's what a real sex. or unless ur hooking up with some kid who doesn't know shit or somebody who masturbates a lot which causes you to nut faster.

  • A man always lasts longer after he has shot his first load, so...
    Suck him and massage his balls until he cums in your mouth.
    Without touching the head, use your hands and mouth to get him erect again, then climb on and ride him until you cum; then roll him over and have him finish on top.

  • Honestly, I feel more when I go slower.

  • Please, don't do this. You need to grow up a little first. Don't just 'hook up' and fuck around - no one will want you.
    Instead, make something of yourself, be successful at what you aspire to, school or career, whatever. THEN, you'll be in a position to actually bring something to a relationship besides a vagina, and actually want to share your life with someone special.

  • A guy that cums fast will cum fast no matter what you do.

    • no not true... I used to cum before in just 1 min or 1½ min... but after I got d trick... it takes me 4-5 mins to cum... and I also can control d duration of time I wanna cum after... but m not that experienced with sex and all so I can't hold more than 5 mins

    • so true solostargazer

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