Do you think you should sleep around when you're younger?

Do you think you should sow your oats before settling down?

I've heard several people say this. They say you should sleep around while you're young, before settling down, so that when you do settle down, you don't feel like you've missed out on being with other people, or so that you don't cheat on your partner because you need to sleep with others.

What's your opinion on this?
Yes, sleep around before settling down
Vote A
No, don't sleep around, but do date several people before settling down
Vote B
No. Not sleeping around doesn't mean you'll be missing out on anything
Vote C
Other
Vote D
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Girl Guy
0 1

Most Helpful Girls

  • Well, I take a long time to trust people so personally I would never be comfortable to the idea of having had casual flings when I was younger. I would have just had this gut feeling of being repulsed by it, through no fault of anyone else but myself.

    But to each his own. That's just me. Everyone else should just do what's right with them and I certainly would not lecture them if they wanted to sleep around a little bit.

    I don't think you can really say it will make someone not cheat. Cheating is a conscious decision someone makes and is inexcusable. You are ever ever going to completely remove any sort of desire to notice that some people are sexually attractive when in a relationship, but that in itself is not something that puts the relationship in jeopardy as long as you still want your partner and like spending time with them. Not sleeping around as a teenager will not help that.

  • That's actually bad advice...

    If you sleep around or not has nothing to do with being a cheater... a cheater will cheat regardless of how many he or she did before their present partner. ... and when you decide you want to settle down it will be with someone you have strong feelings for and feel satisfied with, so you won't feel as if you "missed out" on anything... if someone feels that way, the. Perhaps they settled for the wrong reasons rather than for love or satisfaction with how their lives feel with that person... sleeping around is just bad all around not to mention all the possible stds ewk! 👎!!

    • This is opinions sweetheart. Take it as you will but stop being a bitch. This is just my opinion on said situation. Go b a critic somewhere else.

    • @DoubleTakeEyeCandi haha wtf? You're pathetic, take your own advice, is is MY OPINION, so if you don't like it get off my answer. You can post your own opinion down below if you haven't already. Some people are brainless... 😄!! Lol

    • I don't know... I'd just rather not get into a relationship with someone who has a scary history i. e addictions or list of partners, even the quality of their previous partners says a lot. Wouldn't want to do date a girl who used to date some junky, stoner e. t. c I guess I just have standards for the kind of "lady" I'd like to date.

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  • It all depends what sex means to oneself. I personally, don't really care to have just multiple men "sow their seeds" with me. Just sex alone doesn't satisfy me if it isn't with someone I'm emotionally attached to. I feel that those who cheat isn't due to them not being sexually unsatisfied or "quenching all their thirst" before settling. But more so because people don't get the opportunity and time to date various people, therefore most settle for someone that doesn't suit/compliment them, and find themselves unhappy.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Youth truly is wasted on the young. I would certainly go back and tell my young self to take advantage of missed opportunities, to take risks that I was afraid to at the time, to live a little more in the moment and a lot of other corny (but true) things like that.

    However, I would also tell myself that I got lucky to have survived without a kid or disease or even death (not just from sex), so to be smarter and safer about things.

    Putting all that together, in relation to the question, I do think that it's important to have some fun when you're young and to try different things (people, positions, etc), in order to figure out what your really like and who you can really be with long term. Don't get too serious, too soon, in your relationships. However, that doesn't mean to be promiscuous and unsafe. You only have one life and it doesn't take long to really fuck it up.

  • No, I don't think you should sleep around when you're younger. I believe whatever risks or life decisions you make have repercussions down the line. It could come in the form of a big swollen stomach with a human being in there or some new form of untreatable STD, or just wasted energy that could be channelled to other more productive less risky life - damaging endeavors. The psychological effects on self and future relationships from sleeping around aside. I'd rather just build love and trust with one partner and stay with her.

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What Girls & Guys Said

33 44
  • I got engaged to my first girlfriend, and I'll be honest, sometimes I wonder what it's like with other women.. But at the same time, it doesn't even matter. I found someone who loves me and I wouldn't trade that for anything.

  • I don't condone sleeping around like a slut. I don't want to get sexual diseases, but I do think sleeping around with a couple guys is good for the experience. It can tell you what you like in a partner and what your preferences are.

  • Personally, I don't say "sleep around" but just explore other things not sleep around like sleep with anyone. Try dating with various people. Don't just limit yourself with "one partner" or "the fated one" like that. Be with different people but practice safe *** until you find that "someone".

  • Doing anything like that just for the sake of doing it is usually a bad idea said by people who are probably sad/bitter about chances they missed... but that doesn't mean it's a good idea to go buck wild or give that kind of advice...

    I think dating is a-okay before settling down, no worries and hopefully no intense pressure. Date and find someone good to settle down with, if sex happens before marriage, that's a-okay in my opinion too because that's not against my morals.

  • I don't see why. I mean if you want to go ahead but I didn't feel it to be necessary.

  • If it interests you and everyone involved has informed consent, sure. IT doesn't particularly interest me but fair play if it does other people. Just be sure to always disclose whether you have an STI and what it is.

  • No matter what you need to do what you think is best for you. If you want to risk your sexual health by having multiple partners, that's fine but the partner that you choose to settle down with needs to be aware of how many partners you have had in the past because now their sexual health is on the line.

  • It's been something I've thought about a lot, especially since I'm moving out and going to college. But lately I realized that I'd rather spend my time with the man who treats me right rather than playing the "college kid with no rules" role.
    Even if I wasn't in a relationship I wouldn't actively seek one night stands and sex every night. I feel like just dating and seeing where things go would be the better path for me. Not to say that testing the waters doesn't include sex...

  • Other; do what you want.

    You should enjoy your younger years however everyone is different. I was with someone 5 and a half years, after we broke up I had a one night stand and that was enough for me. It was on my bucket list as I'd only had meaningful sex and to be honest, I far prefer the relationship sexual contact. That's just me. I've had 3 sexual partners.

    I'm fine with that but I know many others who wouldn't be. Each to their own!

  • As long as you do it safely and you don't lead your partners on to thinking there is more than it is, I don't see anything wrong with it.

  • I guess live while you're young right? 😂 I mean as long as you're careful and both agree I don't think there is much wrong with it. I wouldn't at my age cuz I think it's a bit early but... I wouldn't if I found someone either.

  • I think that entirely depends on the person. It's just a matter of what they want. Assuming everything is safe and consensual, I don't see the problem with sleeping around. Likewise, I don't think someone is hindering them self by saving sex for people they love if that's what they prefer. People should have sex or not have sex based on what they're comfortable with and want.

  • Well me personally. No
    I am good.
    ain't gotta worry about hiv or std's etc

  • Depends what you mean by sleeping around. When I think of sleeping around I think of sleeping with multiple different people in a short time period and going back and forth between different partners not being monogamous with multiple different people before you 'settle down'. i. e sleeping with 5 different people in 5 years or even a few people a year with months in between isn't 'sleeping around'. Especially not if a relationship was involved. And even if it wasn't well having sex once in a while isn't the same as going from person to person to person... Would I recommend youth do what I consider to be sleeping around? Well I don't make people's choices for them but regarding things like STI's and pregnancy I say be VERY careful. Unfortunately at that age we often aren't (heck at any age really), no matter how well education we may be, so no I can't fully support it nor do I think it's a very good idea. But I'm still not going to tell people what to do.

  • (I really freaking enjoy how a lot of the guys are saying men should sleep around and women shouldn't. Like seriously? We are both humans, pretty much the same damn things, we can do the same things as each other just one of us can give birth while the other can't.)
    I personally believe you should wait, why waste it on someone that means so little? Sex is sex, it is a natural thing that all animals do, the only difference is we have an option to court the one we desire. I would rather live my life as a penguin than a damn rabbit. Your choice people, all for their own.

  • I don't like the term 'sleep around' it seems to imply that you just go from sex with 1 guy to sex with another etc. However, Ii do believe that we should have a few different sexual partners before we finally choose the person to settle with and marry and breed from... lol

    • why?

    • @Joti_Harrison well the best years of your life are when you are young. after a while it just goes downhill.

    • Why don' t you use the best energetic years of your life to go skydiving, fishing, play sports (football, basketball), arts (music and painting). Those are a lot more productive, fun, give wonderful memories, and take up more time than the average 10 minutes of sex that risks STD'S and pregnancy (aka bringing a whole human being into the world). Besides, I don't think most girls even require the energy of their youth for sex when all most of them do during sex is lie down flat on their front or bend over and wait until the deed is done. You don't need to be young to do that with your husband lol.

  • I slept around some when I was younger and even more so when I got to college. I don't regret it, but I wouldn't recommend it either.

  • I dated a good few but never slept around :)

  • you want to set an example for your kids when you settle down. anything you do now can be held against you and you're viewed as a hypocrite. you should think this through.

    • Why viewed as a hypocrite?

    • because, you can't tell your children off in the future if you did the exact same thing.

  • WAIT UNTIL YOU'RE 30 YEARS OLD!!!
    So much life to be experienced & more people to meet!! 30 & after start you on the road to death.
    Just wait & see that "great things come to those who wait."

    • Wtf. Have sex after 30? 😠

    • @idkwhooooooo I think she meant settle down after 30

    • Wait until your 30 to get married Cujo. Calm down.

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