Do you view giving oral sex as dominant or submissive?

Do you view giving oral sex as dominant or submissive?

I've always viewed it as the person who is giving is taking control in a dominant way and the person receiving is taking the pleasure so more submissive. Am I wrong about this or no?

Dominant
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Submissive
Vote B
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Superb Opinion
  • Actually a good question, but there is no black or white answer. I feel getting a blowjob as a little humiliating for the person doing it, but then, when I performed with my wife a "pussyjob", I never felt being humiliated nor humiliating my wife. Just private fun to please each other, and having a 69 session of course is in any case equal for both partners.

    Giving a standing man a blowjob seems like a more submissive job, and probably also giving a standing woman some pussyjob. Having oral in bed doesn't feel the same, as if more intimate and friendly without any connotation of dominant or submissive. Meaning everything depend on circumstances.

    Somehow still, what you state about the person giving oral being dominant in some way, is true in a particular way: in every sadist there's a slave, and in every massochist there's a sadist, although expressed in different ways. Example: the sadist, "look what you force me to do to you...", and the massochist, "look what you've done to me"...

Most Helpful Guy

  • I believe it really depends.


    Person A, who is taking action and doing XYZ on person B is by definition, Topping.


    But, there is also Service-Topping, which is topping in a submissive way in service of the other person.


    It’s all about the intention and the energy and the positioning.


    Example of giving oral being submissive:


    Person A (Male) grabbing Person B (Female) by the hair, forcing them onto their knees, and receiving oral sex. Holding them in place when they want to. Pulling their face away when they want to. Person A is in control.


    Or


    Person A (Female) pushing Person B (Male) down onto the floor and sitting on Person B’s face as they receive oral. Person B may or may not also be tied down. But, it’s Person A that’s in control.


    Example of giving oral being dominant:


    Person A (Male) holding down Person B (Female) with her legs apart while Person A gives oral. Person A is taking control.


    Or


    Person A (Female) has Person B (Male) tied down with his back on top of a table, powerless to stop Person A from sexually teasing him with her touching and licking. And maybe a riding crop, haha.


    So there you have it.


    It really depends on how one is going about it. It could go both ways. It’s all about energy, intention, positioning, etc.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Foreplay and giving head are very dominant in my opinion. Its when i consider myself in control. But i become submissive during sex itself

    Do you view giving oral sex as dominant or submissive?
    • Im telling him to sit or lie back. I’m whipping his dick out his pants. I’m in control of what happens to his dick at that moment. I can give pleasure and I can cut it off at any moment if i really wanted. I’m giving because it pleases me. Secondarily to please him. Its on his body but his d-ck belongs to me. Like the pic above said “give me my shit”. His reward for letting me have my way with it is him getting to cum

  • To be honest it depends. Some might view it as dominant while others submissive. Personally to me I view it as dominant honestly.

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What Girls & Guys Said

25 86
  • Humiliation does not apply in this sense. Whoever initiates it is obviously the dominant one. If one asks to receive it or does it and expects it in return is the dominant one. Simple.

  • It completely depends on how it's done.

    Were you to see me giving a girl oral, you would have no doubt that I was the dominant and she the submissive, and if I was receiving oral, you'd still have no doubt that I was the dominant and she the submissive. The attitude and the control would be mine in either case.

    • if a girl likes wearing short skirts and doesn't mind getting on her knees she's submissive simple as that... also i like giving a guy what he wants and don't want to give him a difficult time

    • @chrissykerdock I can't argue with that. LOL. Some girls want their man to be more dominant and aggressive than just having her on her knees sucking him, though - and some don't. I agree that either could be submissive on her part, but there is a wide range of what that could entail.

    • i think complying with a man or agreeing to wear short skirts is a start to being submissive for him which does lead to other things... also it's very feminine to dress that way and not exactly a girl who's into or being equal to a man or someone who is concerned about that... but the question is giving oral sex as dominant or submissive... definitely sub for the girl but obviously not a problem and if a man would like that he has a say in that... i think it would be foolish to say that he doesn't and as a submissive you just want to go with the flow and not cause problems... and if you avoid that as a girl i know that would definitely hamper the relationship... is it fair? maybe not but not bad as it seems... and i'll agree it's something i would like to give without complaint.

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  • It's neither it's just oral sex. Its a form of pleasure for both people.

    • Lol almost 17 and a half- HAHA

  • It can be neither or both. It all depends on the how and why.

  • guys would like you to think the girl is being dominant but it's not giving a blowjob is a submissive act... it's the guy who says he needs a blowjob or takes it out for you to suck... for us to get on our knees and suck it... i do like getting on my knees to suck and i like the other aspects of giving a blowjob as well... and like being submissive... shouldn't the guy have a say in what he wants?

  • I’m a giver much more than I care to receive oral because I love vaginal so much more. Like 10 to 1. But I love to give a girl oral because I love to get a girl off so much and observe her body during. So I love to give oral. I do feel more dominant when I give it because she opens her legs, has to trust me to know and make her body climax, be vulnerable, etc.

  • Yeah, especially in the conquering one is seeking a well behaved and generous husband.

  • It can be both depending on how you do it.

  • It can be either, anything can be depending on which role you’re taking. An act alone isn’t submissive or dominant. The person doing the act determines whether it’s dominant or submissive.

    • I have a few quest for u

    • Sure, ask away right here.

    • Which body part u loved for cum

  • I think it can be both depending on how its done
    I mean for one side you are lower then them, looking up to see them that gives them a more dominate postion
    But you do got a lot of control to edge them there and stop, but there Il say they can put there hand on the head that puts them back in a more dominate postion

    over all il say its more submissive but in the right condisions can be dominate

  • I never feel submissive.

    If I'm eating pussy, I think of her as submissive for spreading her legs and surrendering to my ministrations. I can do what I want with my lips, tongue and fingers. I'm trying to give her intense sensations and bring her to orgasm. I'm in control and she's on the receiving end.

    When she's performing oral on me, I think of her as submissive for kneeling before me like a supplicant and pleasuring me. Plus, I can always take control. And exploding in her mouth also feels dominant.

    I realize the irony of thinking of her as submissive when she is sucking my dick while thinking of myself as dominant when I'm essentially doing the same thing to her when I eat her pussy. For some reason, I just don't view women as dominant when it comes to sex. I think their submissiveness is erotic.
    But I have no problem if they lead like little bad asses at times.

    That's just my impression. But there are lots of ways people can look at it.

  • neither, but to give my husband pleasure, I love the look on his face when he is about to blow

    • What does he face look like when he’s about to blow

    • @bravesfan44 sort of distorted

    • I see. Have you had a lot of sex lately

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  • The Provider IS in control of the Recipient's experience. THEY control the Recipient's subconscious innate responses.

    Think of it like befriending the equine mount of a Rider who's feet do NOT reach the ground. They MAY hold the reins but YOU have the horse's undivided attentions for as long as YOU provide what THE HORSE desires; its Rider MAY protest BUT THEY are only sentient 'baggage' ... ever heard of 'blue balls'?
    Its the male version of 'edging' arousal. MORE so, if the participants are societally 'verboden' by age differences, race or genders~

  • Yeah I view the act of giving oral sex as dominant- The only exception I might make is for face-sitting or if there's hair pulling, etc involved.

    • Even with facesitting I still feel like I'm giving into the other person. Doesn't make me feel dominant at all

    • Interesting- we don't do it often, but I always feel submissive when I'm performing oral with facesitting.

  • Dominant: Because I am doing what I want and enjoying the view, the taste, the feelings. I am in control.

    Submissive: Because I am giving her pleasure. She get to relax, enjoy, and have a fantastic orgasm with no effort!

    So actually it is neither. Or both.

  • It's all dependent on how the oral is being performed.

    If the person giving oral is kneeling in front of their partner sucking/licking that is a very submissive position. Especially if ther person recieving is manipulating the givers head like holding it in place.

    If the person giving oral is pinning the receiver down or has there back to the receiver, possibly even being aggressive to the receiver e. g. fast movements of the males cock into mouth or fingers thrusting fast into the vagina. That is the giver being dominant. Though only just the giver is mainly servicing the receiver and not getting much/any pleasure.

    69 seems more of a neutral position as both are getting pleasure.

  • It's active submission, one of the reasons I am not into it, a true dom is not giving oral.

  • I mean I think it totally goes both ways. It depends on how you feel about oral. If a girl isn’t a fan of giving oral then she is goi g to be more naturally subbing for him in that. And I think those are also some of the unhappy facefucked victims.

    • Very true it's probably the girls that don't like it who feel like it's submissive

    • That’s my guess at least. I can’t imagine anyone not enjoying oral…

  • You're not wrong but also, I think, not 100% right either. It can be dominant (in the way you describe) or it can be submissive. But it can also be a 100% even exchange of pleasure.

  • For me personally it's submissive. Being on my knees, having him in my mouth, letting him cum in my mouth, Especially when he takes the control i feel more submissive.

    • @disha10 exactly

    • @disha10 or we will be punished if we don’t, some countries it’s legal for men to punish their women

    • @Jennz6 can you name such country?

    • Show All
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