Guys, is the clit really that hard to find, or do you just not care about it?

I hear it so often from other women that the guy doesn't know how or where to find the clit.

I have experienced this with partners as well where I had to tell them they weren't close, say 'up' or ' left' or 'right' etc. - Which can be kind of awkward.

And since I don't have real experience with other women, I don't know how it is when you have to search for others other than my own.

Also, what has been the most common mistake women do when pleasing you?
Updates:
+1 y
Okay, this question got so much more attention than I thought it would. Thank you all for answering, especially those with constructive thoughts and reflections on this matter. It's been really interesting to read your answers.
0 1

Superb Opinion

  • While each woman is built a bit differently, it's not like you're going to have to check behind her ears or deep in her belly button to find it. But I guarantee you that there are guys who don't even know it exists, or why it's important, because no one formally teaches guys these things. If a guy doesn't care to learn on his own, he's probably not going to know until someone tells him.

    • It's actually really sad... Sex ed. is super important

Most Helpful Guy

  • It’s not hard to find at all, if you know what you’re looking for and actually care 😂

    It can be harder during oral because I don’t have eyes on my mouth and I don’t see what I’m touching directly. But whatever, take a second to look at it.

    If it’s hard to find it could mean that I’m less used to your anatomy. The way the skin folds is different for everyone, and the clit head could be more “outwards” in some people. There are also size differences but usually they don’t matter when the clit engorges. So maybe you need to be more turned on to begin with.

    • Do you have closed eyes during oral? Or where do you look? ... Now that I think about it... I've always wondered

    • Uh, now that I think of it sometimes I do close my eyes. But even with my eyes open, the position while playing with the tongue is not ideal to actually see where the mouth is.

    • Sometimes I look the receiver straight in the eyes to check the reactions. Or other parts of the body.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • I think most just don't care. I was sitting on my friends with benefits lap once with his hand under, playing for hours and not finding the spot. It's funny he actually became frustrated & thought randomly playing anywhere will make me cum. I had to boost his ego anyway & make him think he's doing good🤷‍♀️

    • Aaah it's the worst when they "play" everywhere and think that's enough

    • Maybe he just needs to be educated on the topic and shown were it is. Then he can make you happy, Unless he truly does not care, which can happen. But don't let yourself get short changed because he doesn't know.

    • @asker yeah lol

  • I’ve only had a few partners have trouble with this. I try not to judge but I can understand the frustration. Plus, my clit is pretty small.

    • That's an excuse I had to learn even if I had to look at videos which I don't know whether I did I better eating pussy for some years and I know exactly how to do it I met this girl one time that had a super small clit but with my method I found it and made it come out and I'm so gifted at it that I can hold back that little Hood and find it once I start rubbing my tongue up against it back and forth then you know you got it can't stay on the clip too long though you got to get away from it for a little while then lick the pussy lips put your tongue inside and out and then go back to the clit same method suck on it it could have come out rub your tongue up against it and I guarantee you these girls will be on the ceiling the next advice that I give out you owe me money in my cash app 😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • Ok, good for you? Lol

    • I wasn't being rude I was just explaining

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 38
  • If the guy has any knowledge of female anatomy, it should at least be fairly easy to guess where it's at, so I don't understand the difficulty some guys seem to have.

    After you've found it once, it's almost impossible to screw that up.

    • That's what I'm thinking, and also why I'm confused. Also, won't it be easier after you've licked her as you get to see it directly?

    • You would certainly think so? I remember my first time, thinking, "Ah, so there it is. That wasn't difficult," and I've always been able to zero right in on it, after that. Maybe some guys just don't care about their partner's enjoyment? 🤷‍♂️

    • I think there definitely are some (in this case) men, who don't care about their partner's pleasure as much as their own.

  • No, I can find the clit every time, and I know what to do once I find it. The biggest mistake that women make is remaining totally silent and not making any noise to reveal their arousal. How is a guy supposed to know what's working or not working for a girl if she doesn't provide any feedback?

    • So true, I don't understand those who are just silent O_O And I would like to say this to the guys as well, please moan and show you enjoy it (as long as he does)

    • @asker My balls get attention you will definitely get some very positive feedback.

    • @spartan55 It was actually very late for me before I learned to do anything about the balls. My previous boyfriends just never mentioned it

  • It is not difficult to find at all. Never once had difficulty finding it.

  • Well next time that happens to you grab a hold of that guy's head and tell him stay down there until you find it you're not coming home until you do LOL it's pretty easy to find and if they can't find it with the very tip of there tongue something's wrong

    • It hasn't been that big a problem when they lick, it's more when they use their hands... even if they've been down there. (I don't know about the issue of other women in detail)

    • Well if they have a slow soft touch they can find it in a heartbeat I would think

    • Would seem logic

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  • If someone doesn't care learning about the female body and keeps being stuck like wondering why he can't magically force his way through a wall, ignoring the fact that there is acctually a door which would ease his path to the next room...

    what can I say

  • It's the little bean in the canoe... what could be easier?

    • Haha love that

  • Not hard at all to find, some are less obvious, but still in the same place they're always parked 🤣
    I think maybe some guys just use it as an excuse to either not be bothered or are worried that they don't know what to do with it once they do find it. Women can make a pertty big deal out of men not knowing how to stimulate a clit properly, so I can understand how some guys are intimidated by it.

    • To be fair, I think a lot of guys would make a pretty big deal out of it if it was much more difficult for them to feel and reach pleasure as well.

  • The clitoris is not hard to find. When I was very young and inexperienced, (teens) I had no idea where or what the clitoris was. Sad to say the least. I had an idiot mother who literally repressed me knowing anything about sex. Pitiful woman. She did not know any better than that.
    Sometimes women can be thoughtless too, and not know or care about the man's erotic points, although, to be fair, I think men are much more thoughtless.

    I don't think I have had a woman make a 'mistake' with sex, especially if she had some experience. Example: a young girlfriend thought I had ejaculated, and what she was feeling on her hand was the pre-ejaculate fluid. She had been fucked a few times and I thought she knew about semen.

    • I never understand those who repress sexual information, it's so important. Educate

  • I have no problem finding it or playing with it! I just can''t find one that WANTS me to do it!! It's REAL easy ti find!! Just follow those two flaps up to where they join and Madame Wonderful is hiding under the crux!! A blind man could find it without a dog OR a map!!
    Now, what good is my knowing where it is and how to make it REALLY happy when no one will give me the chance to do so?

    • A superman without his cape

    • A drummer with a passion to play but no drums.

    • An artist without supplies

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  • A lot of it is guys just haven t been shown exactly what is what down there. If you were to give some guy a random quiz what's what and what's where a lot of guys would just fail.

    Now even if you can identify things there's the next step of finding things by feel alone. Even if you ace the first quiz there's a lot of folds and finding the right one by feel is quite difficult. So yes, a bit of guidance is nice.

  • I never struggled to find it.

  • Sorry losers. I go there first. That’s why your girlfriend is always texting you from the spot next to me on my bed.

  • I've never had any trouble finding it, the only thing that can be a challenge is adapting your technique with tongue and fingers depending on the girl's sensitivity. Some like it harder and direct, others are too sensitive and need a much lighter touch.

    As for most common mistake, either being too gentle or stopping stimulation as I start cumming. It's called a ruined orgasm and is absolute torture.

    • Solution to both those things you mention is definitely open communication, it can just be difficult for some. And yeah, practice ;P

    • I'm a very open communicator, as I take great delight in pleasing my partner. Practice is something I've definitely had plenty of...

    • That's great

  • LOL no never had any trouble finding it or the G spot.

  • I found out where the clit is in high school with my girlfriend.

  • Girls are so different. They want different speeds, things done to them etc. Biggest mistake girls do to me is a bj with teeth in the way.

    • Well, I'm assuming wildly here that the placement of the clit isn't that different. And all are different with what they like. And yeah, it can be difficult with the teeth - especially if the guys is bigger/thicker

  • The clit is not hard to find there's an art to it you have to take the whole Hood in between your lips and then you have to suck just a little bit and the clip will come out then you run your tongue over it slowly or faster whatever she needs you to do I'll give you guys that tip for free 😉

  • If she has a full bush it can be a bit difficult

  • With me it is a mission to make the thing sing.

  • That's basic anatomy, how can anyone fail to find it?
    Probably those people just didn't care to do it.

    • Seems the answer often is they don't care or they literally don't know it exists

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