Help me find out if I am really gay?

A 29-year-old man writes to you. I made oral love to an older man once when I was 19. I liked it, but we didn't have sex. I also like to wear women's thongs, to this day I wear them when I can. I also wore women's clothes and a bra, but what excites me the most is wearing women's thongs. I also like to insert objects in my butt, even tried with a dildo and liked it. And I have had such thoughts and sexual desires for men since I was 15-16 years old. For over 10 years I have had such desires, to be in the female role and to be with a man, but I have done nothing else, except that blowjob. At the same time, I was with a woman who left me because of these thoughts and desires. I have fallen in love several times, I like women. But over time, my sexual attraction to women somehow decreased and now disappeared. I still think I can fall in love with a woman, I like them, but on the other hand I want to be like them... The topic is serious. I don't know if I'm gay, I'm confused and I don't know what to do...
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Do what you like. Maybe you like the idea of having the type of attention that women get and feel good about wearing what they do. In all honesty their prolly isn't what people consider to be straight person on earth, well at least some time in their life they will lose that badge. Any guy who has master-bated, you're in the bi circle now. Same for the ladies. can't deny it... Like in the butt, shit tounges feel great, in my opinion. Its no different than anything else that feels good to someone. Some like foot massages some dont, doesn't mean anything else. People dwell on this passed down belief we are supposed to continue with as to keep the herd the on the same path, can have. Always gunna be people scared, hate, not understand... It is not going change, whatever you do, make sure your its for you. Get it in the raw brah!💯

  • Maybe man you are gay... coz honestly speaking as a normal guy i won't have such feelings for any guy. But beeing a gay is not an issue it's kinda Body choses... it's preffrence some girls like girls and some guys like guys. It's as simple. So if u r a gay , then find a man like you and date each other... u will get the answers that... how u felt dating a man...

Most Helpful Girls

  • I think you need to stop trying to label yourself as anything. With todays science backing up the fact that sexuality is not so black and white and proof showing humens sexual habits are far more complex than we can imagine, you need not bother with labels. You are yourself. You enjoy both the company of men and woman. You enjoy the feel of women's clothing and you desire femine items or habits. These are your traits. They make you... You.
    Thats what your "label" is. You just need to think I am "me" and I'm alright with that!.

  • Sounds like one for a professional... crossdressing & enjoying inserting things into your ass has NOTHING to do with your sexuality, by the way.
    That said, sounds like you are probably gay, but has been running from it, trying to suppress it. By 29 years old, sounds like you better get it sorted out quick!

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • i would say that you're gay but in my country (Thailand) its not taboo or something people woll shame you for.

    when you say you like to wear womens thongs abd put things in your butt, but the fact that you say you might still love women or fall in love with women, is probably you're tired of being the one to take care of them but never getting the same treatment back. and thats just telling you maybe youve been with with the wrong women. a lot of women like to be loved but forgetting to take care of their men. this might be the reason why you like the feeling when you're with men. theyre nice abd gentle towards you. everyone likes to handled with care.

    as for if you're gay or not, is it something your family would disagree with?

    • So you think I am gay? Well my family will react bad, for sure. They will be dissapointed. And you have a point in everything you said, but i dont know what to do, its so complicated and confusing.

    • if you dont enjoy sex with women, or dont wtsnt to even think about it, then yes, you're gay. (abd thats not a bad thing please dont judge yourself too harshly) but if you think of wanting sex whether from women or men then maybe you're bisexual. all in all, i think you were unlucky to meet nasty people most of the time... you will meet a nice partner who treats you gently and woyh respect, but don't sit waiting for them. do you best at everything, job, household, sports, and it's in those places that you will meet similar mindsets

  • it sounds like you envy women if so you may be trans-gender and really a woman if this is true your a straight woman or maybe bi. only a doctor can make this diagnosis though but maybe you should talk to a Psychiatrists to find out.

  • if you like boys and girls, bi
    just guys gay

    now dressing up could mean anything maybe you just like the way the stuff feels you aren't the first guy, i had one friend used to wear womans panties and he is a rugged country boy said they made him feel naughty and his wife liked it.

  • Here is how you figure that out, Are you sexually attracted to men? Yes? Your gay. Are you sexually attracted to women? No? Your gay. Its pretty straight forward. If you like both, your bisexual. Again, pretty straight forward.

  • Dude. Literally. No. One. Cares. Stop spamming us with the same shit.

  • You are as gay as a three 💵 dollar bill.

  • Don't invite me to these sorts of questions.

  • What’s your address?
    ill send you a couple Dildos and vaginas pieces to sample on because clearly you have been getting delicious dick.
    Once more inviting me and a host of other members to your incredibly dubious questions about your sexuality. AND then still not taking the opinions given to heart.

    • YOU HAVE NOT BEEN GETTING DELICIOUS DICK! Sorry about the grammatical error. 🙂

  • Why are you so worried about being gay?

  • Please don't stress about putting a label on it. You could have emotional connections with all people, while still only finding men sexually attractive. To me, it sounds like you might be bi, just more into men the women, but like I said don't worry about lables!

  • Everyone already knows you are gay

  • It seems like you are gay. There's nothing wrong with that. I personally know someone I used to be very close friends with who's lesbian. She now has a girlfriend

  • Well, if the attraction to women is gone that's is big sign. And I've had two have my bfs liked to wear my underwear too. Start exploring with guys and find out just don't announce it because u maybe just bi or religious or up bringing is making u hesitant too. I also let one dress up for Halloween 🎃 with me being with him 🤪 it was being it public was his dream I like whatever, lol

  • You are a woman, become a transgender..

    • You don't like to suck boobs?

    • Q2. You like to get fucked in the ass?

    • Yes I dont

    • Show All
  • I don’t know what men find so sexy about women. Men are so sexy and feel so good. If you think like this you probably are gay and you’ll love feeling a man inside you

  • My answer is the same as last time. Only use common sense and look at the opinions already given to you. Don't ask the same again when in doubt, just go back in time

  • I think you're bisexual...

  • You are what you think you are sounds like you are bi to me?

  • Maybe ur girlfriend left cause u kept telling her ur gay. Stop doing that

  • You are probably trans and bisexual

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