How often do you (or your female partners) orgasm during sexual relations? And what do you think is the purpose of female orgasm (if any)?

[mistixs]

[razelove]

Umm, most women I've been with have one or more orgasms before I get off, which I don't see as an option, just a "byproduct of male orgasm" Some women get very turned on by that, but as evidenced by many of them playing with my balls, the presence of sperm doesn't get them off.

Humans and dolphins to the best of my knowledge are the only two species to have pleasurable sex for the females, specifically orgasms. I think it serves two purposes, one, it makes sex better for the male, so we don't think as much, and two, it makes sex better for a female who is conscious, and intelligent. For dolphins, they could just swim off before the males get off, for humans, you could just reach back and squeeze to get yours and make sure you won't get pregnant.

On the same token males of both species could just pull out. We're built with a biological override, an extreme pleasure we want to get, to get off at the same time. We're thinking creatures and we know and think too much, so there has to be an off switch to the thinking when it comes to reproduction.

So, in humans the vagina gets tighter, the cervix dips low, the penis gets harder and regardless of the guy the desire to push deeper gets stronger. We evolved this over a long period of time, birth control is a very recent thing, men and women both don't enjoy the feel of condoms. I'm curious what evolves out of a response to birth control, it works 99% of the time... will that 1% inherit the earth, or the larger masses who have no access to it?

[Boppy]

I think there may be someone misunderstanding the evolutionary argument there.

The argument as I often hear it is that the male orgasm is required to reproduce, and that it evolved with such a process that there was no alternative but to also allow for a female orgasm. As getting female orgasm doesn't reduce odds of reproduction, it was not selected against and, instead, seems to have gained some benefits over the years (pleasure, possible fertility increase, emotional bonding). As being unable to orgasm does not dramatically lower a woman's odds of reproducing, anorgasmic women are more likely to pass on their genes than anorgasmic men (assuming male orgasm is tied to ejaculation).

Calling it "just" a byproduct seems unfair. Many things are evolutionary byproducts and are far from meaningless. I don't know if it's you calling it "just" a byproduct or someone else on here but I don't think it needs to be a demeaning term.

(As an aside, this is mostly an older argument in evolutionary psychology, and not the only popular idea floating around. Note that every model of the world has its error bars, and a convincing narrative doesn't mean something is convincingly proven.)

[mistixs]

Well male orgasm isn't actually required to reproduce. Men can ejaculate without orgasm just like they can pee without orgasm. It's called "ejaculatory anhedonia"

[Girther10]

@Boppy- so what do you think of the askers response that men can ejaculate without orgasm? And it’s “just like they can pee without orgasm”? And what wold be the odds of ancient man and woman being able to resupply the species with enough offspring to make it thrive with “ejaculatory anhedonia”? Me, I don’t see it. It seems the likely reason for much of reproduction is tied to the pleasure of inter course experienced by both genders. Wher am I going wrong?

[Girther10]

And your aside is noted as relevant.

[Boppy]

I agree that male orgasm is not technically required. I don't know the subject very well, sorry about that. Here's my guesses: It seems that if animals (including humans) feel good during sex, they'll want to seek it out. If more pleasure usually comes from things that feel like sex, then a peak in sexual pleasure is when someone is least likely to get bored and stop having sex. As the peak in pleasure offers the best odds of things being in the right place at the right time, it makes sense to me that that's when the most necessary reproductive things should happen (male ejaculation has to happen to conceive, usually). If ejaculatory anhedionia was a thing, I think an animal (say, a human ancestor that can't imagine their future plans) would be less likely to ejaculate in position. Orgasms in women seem very important, too, both because sexual pleasure is nice and because it seems to increase odds of comception (I haven't found a good source on that yet). It makes sense to me that if a woman has an orgasm in the same circumstances that a man has an orgasm (boosting odds of conception), then they'd be more likely to pass on genes. It's odd then that vaginal orgasms from PiV sex are apparently less common than clitoral orgasms. This data seems to go against my hypothesis. This is an interesting subject, but I'm concerned that it may hit some emotional nerves. I find that a lot of evolutionary psychology feels dehumanizing to me, because A. of a gut feeling that humans don't have to play by the same rules as other animals and B. because the models only focus on isolating pieces of a big web of variables, potentially missing out on the context.

[mistixs]

I agree that orgasm, while not technically "required" in either sex, exists to motivate people to engage in sexual activity

[Boppy]

It's like a "cherry on top," but deep within the cone, instead of right at the beginning.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend always makes me cum during intercourse. If a women is not cumming during sex then she needs to have a talk with her man and tell him what he is doing wrong.
The scientific reason for a female orgasm is it pull the sperm farther inside to get to the egg easier This is a reason that a lot of women myself included cum very easily after being cummed in. The other reason is that it feels really good and it makes women want to have more sex to feel it. It sounds like you have never had one and really need to.

[Screenwriter]

If people are pair bonded, good sexual relations strengthen the pair bond. That's the purpose of orgasm in both sexes. Orgasming with strangers gets you immediate sexual tension relief, but there is no extended context afterward. I read that people who are coupled feel pleasure for several days after good sexual relations and it flows into their daily lives.

[Justacatlady]

Why would a female orgasm have no purpose? That makes no sense. It may not produce sperm but it is the bodies response to being fully sexually satisfied.

[mistixs]

I agree. A lot of men say that female orgasm is just a byproduct of male orgasm, which I think is their way of coping with the fact that they can't make a woman orgasm (it's easier to believe it's just women's biology, than to admit maybe they personally just can't satisfy a woman). I made this poll to test the hypothesis.

[Justacatlady]

I see. If it were a byproduct then that would mean I shouldn’t be able to achieve orgasms unless my male partner did. Which I’ve reached orgasm before my make partners and I’ve also reached orgasm without a man. So that would mean a he isn’t required lol

[yoniloverva]

im with the girls on this.. they are God's creatures too.. and deserve to be pleasured just as much as we are.. men need to learn to slow down, take their time and appreciate the womans body from head to toe.. and be thankful she's naked in front of u in the first place..

[wisefool]

i've never heard one man say that female orgasm is a byproduct of male orgasm. however it's a statistical fact that a large percent of women report never having an orgasm.

[mistixs]

@wisefool this question is inspired by someone saying in response to my other question that female orgasm is a byproduct of male orgasm. And yes, more women than men have orgasmic disorders. More women than men also have depressive disorders. That doesn't mean that dopamine is a byproduct in women.

[wisefool]

you lost me. i never said anything is a byproduct of anything. i'm 35 and probably lived with more men than you and all your friends have slept with and i've never once heard the theory you stated.

[mistixs]

@wisefool I only hear it online

[AbleLearner]

Provided your man isn't a complete idiot, and provided you aren't afraid to communicate about your own needs, then women are intended to have orgasms every time they have sex.

I'm pretty sure God created sexual reproduction as an ultimate form of love, perhaps second only to sacrificial love, but human beings find a way to corrupt everything, so most human beings only know "Lust" not "Love". For example, women who have an abortion, or men who urge them to have an abortion, obviously don't know what love is.

[pajamasam]

I had trouble the for a while when I was first sexually active but eventually learned what it takes to get a girl off, it's not as easy as getting myself off, but not impossible. Typically it's just one good orgasm, but one time I had sex about 4 times in one night with a girl and we both orgasmed 4 times.

I think female organs are just as sensational (if not more) than a man's orgasm. Women want to experience the electric sensation as much as guys do.

[ushagomez]

Our orgasm is the reward for accepting you and giving you the potential to make us pregnant.

[mistixs]

But isn't the baby itself enough of a reward? /sarcasm (I've literally heard people say that women don't need to cum because the baby is enough of a reward)

[ushagomez]

I guess I can’t have an opinion on that until I have a baby...

[mistixs]

I think it's an invalid argument because the man gets the baby too. So the woman should be able to orgasm too.

[ushagomez]

If our only reward would be a baby then the boyfriend is going to have to wait about 12 years until he can have sex.

[Sensmind]

I usually only orgasm once maybe twice and I try to help my female partner to as many orgasms as possible. I believe the female orgasm is much more important than the male orgasm in a sense the male orgasm is almost purely physical and the "Loved Up" feeling is probably fed from elsewhere whereas the female orgasm is quite complex on a number of levels and those interested in relationships and commitment want use a healthy physical relationship to enhance the "Loved Up" buzz. I feel it probably plays a bigger part for women in deeper relationships. To me her orgasm (s) are everything during physical romantic interaction.

[Apple1996]

They defo have a purpose. If girls didn't orgasm then they probably wouldn't be craving sex

[DaMack999]

Many women never had orgasm they just enjoy the penetration feeling n emotional connection.

[Apple1996]

@DaMack999 some men are this way also. My husband doesn't need to cum during sex to enjoy it. He is completely happy just being able to be close to me

[DaMack999]

I know I am the same too. I enjoy eating my women too and satisfied me completely. People are different.

[Girther10]

@Apple1996- I know, right? It’s like duh! Orgasms both man and woman are most of the reason to want to have sex, it’s what guarantees survival of the species. All that other crap, is just nonsens m as is this question, in my opinion.

[Girther10]

aApple1996- Keeping in mind this is the Asker that claims that male masterbation to ejaculation is the greatest genocide of all time , bc each sperm is a person who’s life is being denied much similiar to abortion... 🤣😂😅

[pierre7i]

I love it when my female sexual partner orgasms, not only because it makes me feel good for being able to pleasure her sexually but also because women are absolutely as entitled to experience
sexual pleasure as much as men, so it pleases me very much to see a girl enjoying the sensations & pleasure that orgasms can give

Additionally, I find it sexually hot - verrry hot - to see my partner in the throes of an intensely beautiful orgasm, it definitely makes the whole sexual experience with her much more enjoyable & pleasurable for me

[Girther10]

First of all, I find the options you list to be silly for the most part, and reflect the ideas of someone hopelessly inexperienced with the topic for which these options exists. Th idea that the female orgasm is just a byproduct of the male orgasm is just nonsense.
Female orgasms purpose is to make the female want to have sex , bc it feels good etc. The idea that it is a byproduct of the male orgasm makes no sense bc women master bate without a male or his orgasm present and still orgasm.
The first two options should not even be there bc who cares what someone who has never had sex thinks about sex? Same with orgasms, if you’ve never had one why would anyone want to know what you think about orgasms. Most of his is just nonsense, and I continue to wonder why this Asker is so obsessed with a topic of which she has so little actual experience with, nor any expertise even enough to come up with rational subtopics, or sensible options for her many queries.

[mistixs]

The reason I'm asking is that I've seen many men saying female orgasm is just a byproduct of male orgasm. I suspected that the men saying this were just trying to feel better about the fact they can't make a woman orgasm. The options I provided enabled me to obtain an answer to this hypothesis, and it appears my hypothesis is correct

[Girther10]

Ok then I stand corrected. At least on part of what I surmised. Have you considered ever drawing some conclusions yourself about these polls? Or do you leave it to each reader to read the results and draw their own conclusions? Because I would not come to the conclusion you have with this particular querie, based on this data. Of course exact wording matters when you make these conclusions too. But it’s your question, your hypothesis, and your decision how to word the replies so you know what you re after, I guess. And it makes a lot more sense now that I know you have a method to your madness... lol I remain skeptical of the idea that any worthwhile data is gleaned from people who have little or no experience with the topic being surveyed. But hey, who am I?

[mistixs]

"any worthwhile data is gleaned from people who have little or no experience with the topic being surveyed" Well this poll demonstrates that the guys saying "female orgasm doesn't have a purpose" are far more likely to be inexperienced virgins who don't know what they are talking about. It gives me perspective regarding who I am arguing with, when guys say female orgasm doesn't have a purpose. According to this poll, if a guy says that female orgasm is just a nonadaptive byproduct of male orgasm, then it is likely I am either arguing with a guy who's an inexperienced virgin, or is trying to feel better about the fact that he can't make a woman orgasm (it is easier to say "women's bodies aren't adapted for it" than to accept maybe there's something wrong with themselves).

[mistixs]

Also I generally do not mention my conclusions because I don't want to bias the poll results. (For example, a guy who insists female orgasm is a "byproduct", and never makes his girlfriend orgasm, might choose that his girlfriend usually orgasms, in order to hide the real reason that he insists that female orgasm is a byproduct.)

[Girther10]

Actually what I was thinking was after the poll runs its course, and about the time you choose Mho ‘s. That might be the time to make a quick summary of the conclusions, and wouldn’t corrupt the data, as it would already have been analyzed.

[Jaximus-Lion]

Me and the wife have been together since 2008, so i mastered HER orgasms and 9/10 i make her orgasm (No cunnilingus) of course some oral in the beginning, sometimes more than half session.
There is a purpose but am not sure what it is, the things i can tell from all these years it's the result of reaching the highest point of sexual pleasure (well not literally). Because of reaching that point , the female gets an orgasm as a stimulation relief and muscle tension.
What do you think?

[Drumlin2001]

Usually we'd have sex 3 times a week. I try to make her climax every time.
Suppose it's natures way compelling us to have sex, to make it enjoyable

[MannySimms]

Orgasms are God given. Before humans became "civilized" infant mortality was very high. Humans were prey. So since it feels good, people did it more to insure continuation of the species. "Lower" life forms have them too, for the same reason.

How's that?

[J2ohhhhh]

Keep men guessing.

[broken_heart_at_48]

I prefer to run marathons when it comes to sex I believe it keeps you young and that's one benefit and purposes but I also believe orgasms are a bonding tool my goal for me is to get mine at least twice a day (my goals don't always work out but it tends to even out) and my wife as many as she handle. We got all the practicing out of the way a long time ago so we seem to have a better sex life then most 20 year olds even after our marriage fell apart

[Insightfull]

It's fun to make women orgasm. Last time I was with someone she fell off the bed haah

The purpose is to motivate procreation, but the real purpose it to enjoy it

[wisefool]

the purpose of female orgasm is to increase chance of conception as has already been shown by science. it's none of your business how often me or my female partners orgasm.

[mandowood]

Honestly I stopped trying to keep count of her orgasms. Normally there is oral 1st and after the 1st dozen or so they start to blend together where I don't know where one ends and the next begins. Then penetration she has a few more. I can really only get off if she is too.

[Massageman]

Several theories have been proposed, even well-studied, but nothing conclusive has come from the studies.
Note: The three most-cited theories are:
1. Mate and pair-bonding selection
2. Semen retention
3. "Just a nice bonus"

[ActiveSh1tter]

No such thing as female orgasm. Most women just confuse random itching for orgasm. In fact studies show most women don't care at all about sex and orgasms whereas most men do.

[mistixs]

Keep telling yourself that, if it makes you feel better

[ActiveSh1tter]

You can't really expect most men to believe this "female sexuality" crap when 99% of women keep screaming about rape and the evil disgusting penis 24/7. If sex and orgasms were important to women they wouldn't always demand they be paid for sex with commitment or money.

[mistixs]

I am amused by the results that show that the guys who think female orgasm is a byproduct are mostly guys who have rarely or never seen a woman orgasm. Exactly what I suspected

[ActiveSh1tter]

Polling doesn't prove anything. Most women will claim that orgasm and sex are important then in the same breath yell that men are disgusting for thinking about sex so much and every woman who cuts off a penis is a hero who should be praised.

[mistixs]

The only thing you're good at seems to be making generalizations

[ActiveSh1tter]

Aren't you the girl who asked questions about Jessica Pin? The hostility and mockery she gets from 99% of women is proof of how much they value sex. She talks about it all the time. Do you follow her on Instagram?

[Jamie05rhs]

The purpose of female orgasm is for the girl to have fun and enjoy herself. And as someone who works in customer service, I always want those who I am serving to have an enjoyable experience.

[Ianto]

Female orgasm certainly has a purpose.
The obvious is about pair bonding. Mutual pleasure brings you together.
There is also evidence that female orgasm is active in sperm competition, as the contractions cause the cervix to dip into the pooled semen. That means she can favour her exciting lover's sperm over her boring husband's.