I saw a documentry once about being asexual and the people in it seemed very happy with who they were. Some were in relationships and it was understood by both that sex wasn't important to them and they are okay with it. It's your life and I think you should be who you want, especially when it comes to the bedroom ( or not ). I wish I could remember the documentry name for you. I'm sure there are website communities that will have a forum of people who you could ask questions or just relate to, maybe give google a try...
I don't think you have to be alone just because you're asexual. Maybe if you explore support groups or asexual communities out there you could meet a woman who accepts and understands you and vice versa.
:)2 1 0 0If I can actually find a woman who is asexual AND is willing to be in a relationship with me, that would be the happiest moment of my life. Sometimes I still get a small ray of hope that I may not be asexual and I just haven't met the right women, but I know very well that I would only be kidding myself if I actually believed in those thoughts. :(
You might find this site interesting... asexuality. org/en/topic/63686-romantic-asexual-couples-who-both-like-masturbate-still-dont-have-sex/
Ps take out the spaces in the link, not sure why it's pastes like that.
There's many women who are asexual as well. And you can still have them wear pretty lingerie for you, massage each other, cuddle with each other. I used to be very afraid of male genitalia until I got over it. So I guess I had no desire for sex either, thus I know where you're coming from. But that allows you to see women in a light that doesn't require their sexual favors, and more amorous in the metaphysical way.
0 0 0 0You don't have to be depressed. I know it's not easy, I'm feeling the same right now.
You could join to some asexual community and maybe you will find a woman who's also asexual and loves you.
Yes, it's hard but it's not impossible to find someone who understands you and accepts you for who you are.
You should look at this website : https://www.asexuality.org/home/0 0 0 0
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Asexuals seem to make the odd assumption that just because you don't feel the craving to have sex with someone, you cannot have sex with them at all.
I don't really get that reasoning. In fact, there are asexuals who choose to have sex to fill in the "needs" of their partner either way. In fact, you can want to have sex with someone even if you don't feel the internal craving, especially if you don't even know what I mean by that...
But if you have never found anyone physically attractive just by a glance before, then your chances for being asexual are fairly high.0 0 1 1I have found a lot of women physically attractive, but never sexually attractive.
I don't understand what that means. To me, physical attraction IS their capability to induce sexual arousal just based on their looks.
I get you. But for me, I can have physical attraction (that is the need to hug, kiss, hold hands, cuddle etc.) but never the need to indulge in actual sexual intercourse.
I am asexual. First of all calm down. Second, if you really makes any sense to you go to an asexual online community and talk about. It is not that safe to do it here. https://www.asexuality.org/en/
Let me know if you need anything else?0 0 0 0Thank you! Actually, I was convinced that I'm asexual. But after reading some responses here, I need to question it again. Quite confused, to be honest. I will definitely check out that forum.
there is a lot of acephobia on this site, seriously go talk to asexual people about this. We are not recruiting, the ace community is a safe place to help figure yourself out. Let asexual people tell you their experiences, don't let non-asexual people tell you what they think an asexual's experiences should be!
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2 4If you were truly asexual, you wouldn't be worried about it. You wouldn't care. However, you do. Not asexual. Another pointer is that you do masturbate to women. Clothed or not, hey some women are sexy af with clothes on.
0 0 0 1Well... that's a relief! But then, I suppose there is something about the actual act of sexual intercourse or female nudity which is messing up my mind.
It may be well be nerves that are messing with your head. I know when I first had sex, it was devastating. You may be one of those rare people these days that just isn't able to get aroused until you've found that one person you truly connect with.
I guess you're right. So I can be sure of things only if and when I actually get into a situation where I can have sex.
"I do masturbate often"
You are artificially reducing your sex drive by masturbating. You are not asexual. Stop masturbating so fucking much and maybe you'd get horny enough to sleep with a woman.0 0 1 1Well... by 'often', I meant about two or three times a week. I don't suppose that is too much.
This argument again. Sexual attraction and arousal are different things.
If you already have a low sex drive, then you're Jerking it on top of it. You're lowering it even more. a·sex·u·al/āˈsekSH (əw) əl/ adjective without sexual feelings or associations. (of reproduction) not involving the fusion of gametes. noun a person who has no sexual feelings or desires. Masturbation, is a sexual feeling. You are not asexual. Asexual is someone who doesn't have any desire to do anything with their penis or vagina. You, masturbate. Asexual isn't someone who's not attracted to anyone, it's someone who has a non-existent sex drive by definition. For example, I could be attracted to a toaster, it's hot elements could turn me on, sexually. That would make me a sexual deviant, not an asexual. "but that is usually by fantasizing about hot women who are clothed." So if a woman was fully clothed, and had a slit for insertion. You would be attracted enough to have sex? You fantasize about women, which means you're attracted to women... or their clothes...
Don't be depressed, I used to be depressed before I made the realization that I'm asexual, but when I did, I felt a huge weight off my shoulders. But finding another asexual is hard... it's tough, but you're not alone.
1 1 0 0Thank you for your kind words! :)
Don't beat yourself up about it. Sex is not the only reason we live.
0 0 0 0I do understand that, but I do feel the need to love and be loved, like most humans. I just don't feel the need to have sex. So why would a woman want to be with me if I can't have sex with her, considering sex is an important part of the relationship for straight/bi/gay people?
No need to be depressed about it.. just tell your woman you're saving yourself for marriage... and never proceed to propose. Problem solved :)
0 0 0 1I don't suppose that would be the ethical thing to do. And even if I did, I can only do that until a certain. What would happen when I', 50+? This 'trick' won't work.
*until a certain age
Yeah but sexual feelings might arise once your with a certain female for a while.
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