Is spinning the bottle game cheating, my boyfriend broke up with me?

[Anonymous]

Were both 21 and I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and everything has been great. Last week I went to a party with college students and they were playing spin the bottle and I played and kissed 4 guys and 3 girls. I'm not gay by the way, I'm 100% straight but the rules of the game were that if you are a woman you have to kiss whoever it lands on no matter if they are a guy or a girl. But if you are a guy and it lands on another guy you don't have to do it and can spin again till it lands on a girl. Not sure why the rules were like that but it was. I'm 100% straight but I woudn't mind making out with a girl if I was drunk enough or if she was hot enough just for fun haha Anyways I ended up kissing 4 guys and 3 girls, it didn't mean anything, it was just a game. When I told my boyfriend he got upset, hurt, and I tried explaining to him that it was not a big deal, that it was just for fun. He claimed I cheated on him, he said he would never do that to me. He also said "what if I became a porn star, had sex with woman and claimed, it doesn't mean anything, its just doing my job" and he started saying "what are you now bi, how do you kiss a gender for fun even though you are not atracted to them" and I tried explaning its not impossible and that and even thought I'm 100% straight, I woudn't mind making out with a girl if I was drunk enough or if she was hot enough just for fun and that made him angrier and said that I was a immature child, a sorority cunt and he broke up with me and left. He also said the very least I should have done was tell him before actually doing it so that way he could have made a decision on whether or not this is something he tolorates, its just that I never thought it would be a big deal to bring up. When I asked him why didn't he ever ask me where we stood on kissing other people he said "well geez, i dont know, it just seemed like commn sense that kissing another person che

[gray_sailor]

Read all the comments, and I agree it the majority: you cheated.

A couple of points:

I've read a number of your responses to others where you said that your ex boyfriend should "grow some balls". What you really mean is that he should "shut up and take it". You want him to quietly tolerate your misbehavior. That is the opposite of growing some balls. You are just butt hurt that he defended his boundaries and left the relationship.

Furthermore, your ex was not being controlling either. Controlling behavior would be if he remained in the relationship with you but demanded to never have you be out of his sight, or to never go anywhere without him. Controlling behavior would be cutting you off from your friends or telling you where you could or could not work.

Your ex did none of that. What he did do was, like any mature adult, he defended his boundaries. He refused to be in a relationship with someone who did not value that relationship as highly as he did.

Calling him a pussy for not happily rolling over and being your bitch is just sour grapes on your part. You just got busted with your hands in the cookie jar and so you are trying to rationalize your way out of it.

Lastly, I don't see it that he broke up with you over the kissing game so much as the argument that followed it. He told you he did not like that you kissed others. At this point, if you had said you were sorry and that you did not understand that this was a boundary for him, he would have forgiven you. Alternatively, you could have said to him that you require more autonomy when in a relationship than he is willing to accept. If that was the case, you could have amicably broken up with him yourself. Either of the above approaches would have been superior to what you actually did.

You demanded the right to violate his boundaries without consequence. Which is to say that you demanded he either eliminate his boundaries or change them to match yours. THAT is controlling behavior. He refused to be controlled by you.

Actions have consequences.
I thought adults knew that.

[Soshy]

What he said ^^

[YatoNoragami]

Nailed it.

[AleDeEurope]

He's right, it's cheating. Just because it's a game doesn't mean it doesn't count. So what if the game says you gotta blow a guy off? What if you have to fuck him? Is it still ok cause "it's a game"?

He's right, you sound like an immature guy, and good for him for breaking up with you.

[Asker]

I'm not a guy, and you are just being too sensitive

[Asker]

Maybe you're to stupid to see that my icon is pink and that represents females, and based on the context of what I wrote you should have figured that out. And sex is different than kissing, so no you suck at arguing

[Gman77]

Couldn't agree more!

[AleDeEurope]

Oops, I meant girls. And explain me how I'm being too sensitive? You wanted me to tell you you're excused from cheating? xD Grow up kiddo -_-

[AleDeEurope]

Well, reading you comments to other opinions, you sound either like a troll or a bitch, so whatever.

[Gman77]

I think she is #2! Obviously isn't a very bright college student, when she makes a mistake someday like getting pregnant or getting in a drunk driving accident. Maybe she'll realize what the hell she is doing.

[Asker]

Listen I'm no troll or whatever ok, this is how I am and too bad if you're close minded.

[Asker]

He didn't have to break up with he, he over reacted, some guy even agreed with me that he over reacted

[Gman77]

He over-reacted because he cared. But, obviously your a special level of stupid to not see that... Lol, I hope you get your heart destroyed someday after he finds out you have an STD from having sex with too many college guys.

[AleDeEurope]

@Gman77 Yeah, lets just ignore this loser, she's still bitter that he broke up with her bitch ass xD

[Gman77]

Lol it's just gonna be super funny when she realizes she messed up big someday while "living the good times" Anyhow, point proven.

[Asker]

@Gman77 other people agree with me , just read the comments, the one guy even said he was acting like a bitch, so maybe you're wrong

[godfatherfan]

LOL... she realizes that she is a cheating POS. and now everyone that points it out is "over sensitive". cheating is cheating. A kiss or sucking their cock, same sin... grow up and figure it out. He is better off dumping you as you probably will "accidentally" fall on another guys cock at some point also.

[Echelon333]

Oh was that guy that agreed with you one of the 4 that you kissed while playing? -.- Grow the fuck up girl, he didn't overreact, he did the right thing! If my current girlfriend kissed 4 guys, even 1 guy, I would dump her no matter the situation that the kiss happened!

[MaskedSanity]

He is entirely right and it is you who needs to grow up.

The fact that you didn't even consider asking him how he felt before you went out and sucked face with 7 different people speaks volumes about your character, or lack thereof, to be precise.

"the rules of the game were that if you are a woman you have to kiss whoever it lands on no matter if they are a guy or a girl. But if you are a guy and it lands on another guy you don't have to do it and can spin again till it lands on a girl"

You hang out with some interesting hypocrites, by the way. Your ex viewed your behaviour as highly inappropriate and rightfully so since the guys in that group got to make out AND get visual stimuli from watching girls make out in front of them.

Ultimately, your ex doesn't owe you anything and bringing his heritage doesn't make an ounce of difference.

I'd dump your sorry arse too.

[Cmasterson]

I think that's rubbish, first off if you're 21 and in a relationship you shouldn't really be participating in a game like that, it's usually for singles. You did cheat on him because you did kiss other people, and so what if they were girls some guys aren't comfortable no matter what sexual orientation you are. You really were in the wrong, if roles were reversed you'd probably feel betrayed if he kissed other girls too. It's true if you're in a monogamous relationship with only each other, kissing people outside the relationship isn't going to be tolerated most likely.

[Cmasterson]

I think also its the fact that you were so willing to kiss other people is what bothers him the most, he doesn't know where you'd draw the line.

[OctoberBaby26]

Tbh this is considering cheating. Tap kiss or not. If your in a relationship then it is Common Sense to know it's not right to kiss other people while being in a relationship even if it didn't mean anything. Even if you guys didn't have a conversation on if it's alright to kiss other people it's still should've been something you should've known not to do. That's like saying "I had sex with another guy, my boyfriend broke up with me but we didn't have a conversation Wether if it was right or wrong if we could fuck other people while being together" lol.

[Anonymous]

I agree with your boyfriend. Kissing other people should be common sense not to do while in a relationship. Who caresnif it was a game? Like he said, you should have called and told him what you were going to do, or better yet, not play a kissing game in the forst place. I know its no fun.. but you chose to be in a relationship amd if you can't handle the boundaries, then be single.

[Opinion Owner]

And it has nothing to do with his latin culture lmao. My boyfriend is also hispanic. That has nothing to do with it. He just doesn't want his girlfriend to kiss other people and thats not so hard to understand.

[Asker]

Just saying I'm not dating Hispanics anymore, not going to deal with that latin-lover posse boycott crap, he can go back to Mexico if he wants a traditional girl. Whatever makes him happy I guess. American girls like me like having fun other ways and he's to into the whole overly romantic thing and being so traditional. Its just a kiss, I didn't fuck anyone

[Gman77]

It's called being a normal person.

[Asker]

*pussy boy scout crap

[Gman77]

LOL! Never have I ever been a scout, never will I.

[Opinion Owner]

Its not being traditional, its being a fucking decent human being.

[Red_Arrow]

Please stop saying things like "American girls like me". It has nothing to do with American or any other nationality. Just say "Bitches like me" and you will have it right.

[Echelon333]

Good for you not dating hispanics, i mean good for them ofc.. They won't have to listen to the bullshit that's coming out of your big mouth! I think you should stick to your own, the relaxed and chill 'muricans lel But we'll be waiting for your next question here, about your next boyfriend, although I don't know how your previous one lasted that long :S I salute to him for his patience and kindness! Oh he's into the whole overly romantic thing, why did you put up with that romantic shit then lol Oh wait, you liked being treated like a princess and i bet he did so many great overly romantic things and you fucking liked it but then you kiss 7 people in 1 night (ofc it was a game only so np right?) and you're over that romantic shit? You really need professional help girl, go get it before it's too late..

[Echelon333]

Even just a kiss is considered cheating, of course not for a bitch like you lel (normally i don't offend someone easily especially on the internet but reading your comments to the other opinions was like, is she that dumb and ignorant.. ) So you cheated on him, he left you (I'm happy for him cause he found out soon enough what a stupid innocent girl you are) Oh and.. " he can always go back to Mexico and find himself a traditional girl." AHHAHAHAHHA Why the hell do you even post this question then.. ? Damn, i hope he does find a girl like that in Mexico! Good luck to your next boyfriend!

[StewieRH]

I can kind of see his point. I would not be comfortable with my boyfriend kissing another girl even if he was playing spin the bottle - He shouldn't be playing it in the first place!

I do find it a little odd that you say you kissed some girls but would be uncomfortable with him kissing a guy.

My advice would be next time you're in a relationship, discuss what you would both consider cheating and what you are comfortable with before doing anything.

[theccanyon]

You troll as shit, little boy. ^_^

Just leave my country and Hispanics out of lame trawls like this. At least make it funny.

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[Baggz]

You could've asked him to come along at the party and would've been avoided all in all. Both parties approached the whole situation wrong. To me this game is really a petty reason to break a 2-year relationship, especially if that relationship has already created some strong history/bonds before it became a relationship. But then again, I'm a little wiser. I just might've acted the same way back then, but back then, I am not what you guys would consider a "boyfriend-material" kinda guy.

You knew the rules would involved kissing and probably knew your boyfriend had some issues with it regardless if you kissed a man or woman. Sure its only a game. It has nothing to do with culture. More on how he views certain situations. You did right by telling him, which in turn, I wished he had given it some more thought before making a rash decision on the spot and throwing everything you two had built together in one swoop, but you also could've avoided this situation if you just hadn't played the games that involves someone touching you. You knew your ex for 2 years. In that 2 years you didn't see any possessive traits? 2 years is an awfully long time to get to know a person, especially in an intimate one.

This situation really boiled down to personal views between 2 people. It had nothing to do with ethnicity or ethnic traditions/cultures.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

How is that a petty reason to break up, some people take that seriously, no its not petty, and I would be upset. If you are ok with it thats you, if you can tolerate things, that all you, but that does not mean what he feels and how he responded to that was petty, he moved on and realized he won't tolerate it, he has different values. No petty at all.

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah Stop being a bitch ok, its petty deal with it.

[Asker]

@Gman77 this guy think the reason to break up was petty, and stump is being a bitch also

[Baggz]

To asker: It's quite alright. I see two sides to the story/views with this and I can respect either points. I don't think he was being a bitch at all, but I don't think he read everything I have said either. I have grown over the years; in those years, matured... even my perspective in certain situations had changed. Things I may have viewed back then is not how I view them now. I still retained some views or certain aspects, even when time changes, that I still strongly against or in favor. So yes, I still stand by from what I said and yes, it that's me (it is after all, my own opinion). I wasn't imposing my opinion on you. I can see that my opinion may have gotten you upset that you responded. So yes it is a petty reason (viewed now). If I mentioned some men/women and some men/women then I'm generalizing and included an entire gender, but you will find that nowhere in my initial thread. I did also mention how I may have handled it back then.

[ArtDent]

He also said you knew your ex would have a problem with it and did it anyway. That's a very good reason to end a relationship.

[Baggz]

@Stumpy_Cheetah I would put my views in a detailed perspective, but really what's the point? It would only be lengthy and no matter how much someone pushes their views to me, wouldn't even impact my take on it. It would take a considerable amount of discussion to even change my views on things... doubt that you'll even have the time for. I respect your point in the matter bro, really I do, but to me it's petty (I based my views on her one trait she mentioned that I hold very important in my relationship). If she mentioned that she used to go behind her boyfriends back and randomly kiss a guy she likes... trust me, I'll be grilling her a new hole... not literally, but I think you know what I mean.

[Asker]

Stop being a pussy and comforting to these weak guys, just say its petty and call them out on being a bitch. He needs to man up and grow a pair, he's a man, men are supposed to be relaxed and thats it

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

It also sounds like your implying that since you are wiser thats why its petty to you, so therefore people who think like me or her ex boyfriend are not wise. So its not just about having different opinions, its about you being wider and older and us not being wise. You also said back then I would have acted the same way. So it just feels like you are implying that were just being immature. It feels that way but I apologize if I'm taking you out of context

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

I don't have a problem with you finding it a petty reason to break up with a girl who did that to you, I have a problem with you thinking people like me are petty for doing that. Like if somethings wrong with us for feeling that way or for having different standards. If it does not bother you for a girl to spin the bottle, power to you, and you do you. But if it bothers me and other people i think its unfair for people to call us petty. For example, I would not want to be in a open relationship where my girlfriend and I are open to sleep with other people because something about it feels shady, dirty and wrong. But if 2 consenting adults want to do that, even thought I would not do it myself, I don't think they are dirty or shady for doing it. Thats kinda how I felt about your petty comment

[Baggz]

@Stumpy_Cheetah do you really wanna pursue two colliding views? Believe me, we will be wasting both our times if you wish to pursue the issue. I do want to make one thing clear though, nowhere in my initial thread states you or other men. You assumed I was implying, but I wasn't. Don't assume, just ask me. If what I said was unclear, just ask for clarification. If you want to know why and give you an example, in detail, just ask. I'll answer it. I mentioned that I wish her ex handled the situation differently. I was putting myself in his situation, not you or any other dudes up in here that shares the same views as you or not. Just because I said I matured in my ways of thinking that's a subjective thinking. So I really don't understand what you're really driving at here. You did say, "you do you". Please quote anywhere from what I have said where I wasn't? What are you doing?

[Baggz]

TS wasn't hiding what she had done. In fact, she told him about it because she honestly believed her ex would honestly brush it off, which he didn't. He had values he holds that she had probably have forgotten or didn't know about (2 years is an awfully long time...). Nowhere in her thread shows how her relationship is. Just told us he broke up with her. Sure, I can ask her to provide me how her relationship and all that jazz but why go all through that hassle. I rather put myself in his situation and how I would have handled it the way I am today.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

I ask for foregiveness for taking you out of context and for assuming. I misunderstood and misspoke.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

I'm sorry sir

[Baggz]

@Stumpy_Cheetah you good bruh 😊 There wasn't anything you said or done that needed forgiveness nor what you said offended me in any way (I'm too numb to be bothered by words). You said what you needed to say and I respect that. I still believe it was a petty thing for throwing 2 years of a seemingly healthy relationship down the drain lol 😂😂😂

[Echelon333]

But.. you're the only one being a bitch here not him :S As someone else said, if you two agreed that's acceptable at the start of your relationshipt then it's fine, but as we see here you haven't so it's a pretty good reason to break up even a 10 year relationship! Stop insulting other people's opinion and the person behind it you dumb sh*t! Hehehe see what i did there =.= Accept your mistake (s) and move the fuck on, there's nothing you can say that will make what you did ok and "not worth it for a break up"! I feel really sorry for him, you were together for 2 years, that's not a short period like 2 months.. You probably broke his trust that he had built over for the past 2 years and as many say, broke his heart! Good job girl!

[DeadShot619]

I think u need to reevaluate ur opinion on what constitutes as cheating. Regardless if it's a game or not, u kissed other people. That's cheating. Doesn't matter what the circumstances were. If ur in a relationship u shouldn't play spin the bottle. Unless u and ur partner have agreed beforehand that certain things are acceptable.
And being honest is not a mistake here. If u hadn't told him he would've found out from somewhere else eventually. Honesty is always the best policy

[Asker]

No, you're wrong and you are being a over sensitive boy scout control freak, a kiss is just a kiss. Overly jealous and controlling.

[DeadShot619]

To u that's what it is. But obviously to him a kiss means more. And it's not for u to decide what a kiss means to him. For me personally, I don't think I would've broken up cuz of that, but I would've said if it happens again we're through. Since in ur mind it sincerely wasn't any big deal I would've told u how I felt about and then if u did it again then bye bye. I think that's what he should've done but again, it's his choice. Obviously to him a kiss is very important

[Asker]

You're being over sensative if you would break up because of that, you're a control freak and overly jealous.

[DeadShot619]

Control freak? No. I just don't want my woman kissing other men. Just like my woman would feel like kicking me in the balls if I kissed another woman. Again I say TO U IT MAY NOT BE A BIG DEAL BUT TO HIM IT OBVIOUSLY IS! All people r different. U should make a poll on this. In fact how bout I make a poll and post the link here and we'll see what the majority think?

[DeadShot619]

I hope this link works but here is the poll

www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1875421-is-this-cheating

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

post the link to her question on your poll so people can have more context, i think it would be cool bro

[DeadShot619]

@Stumpy_Cheetah ya that's a good idea. thanks man! It's anonymous anyway so no identity issues

[lumos]

It's clear that you don't want a monogamous relationship. That's what he wanted and he had every right to leave.

[gray_sailor]

Concise, and undeniably accurate. Good post.

[lumos]

@gray_sailor no need to point out stuff others have pointed out, is usually my motto on here. :)

[GingerBear]

Yeah, no, that's so not cool. Don't kiss other people when you're in a relationship. It's pretty simple.
If I were him, I'd be pissed as hell. If my boyfriend did that, I'd hate it, and if I did it, he'd be just as upset.
If you don't get that, you probably shouldn't be in a relationship to begin with, or at least find an open relationship.

[existing_not_living]

Lol, you're really stupid.

[Asker]

no you are, get off your black pedestal, you're blind

[existing_not_living]

Lol, my black pedestal? Are you trying to be racist or whatever?

[Asker]

Oh and I mean black pedestal as in a pedestal consumed by darkness, not because you're black, no racism intended but I don't want you to start randomely pulling out the race card since it seems you people like doing that and blaming me for white privilae or enslaving blacks, latinos or Native Americans, no thank you

[existing_not_living]

Also, how am I blind? Blind to what? Your idiocy? Cause, I'm pretty sure I can see it all over your question and your response to my opinion.

[Asker]

I'm not racist I swear

[Asker]

If you have a problem with Americans like me then go date my ex, his Mexican traditional Latin lover romantic bull crap should fit you nicely, I'm not racist but go find him in mexico, seems like his traditional ass is there, if he's going to be in america he needs to adapt and stop being a fucking foreign donkey fucker. I'm never dating latin guys again, fuck that

[existing_not_living]

1. Lol, wtf? "I don't want you to start randomely pulling out the race card since it seems you people like doing that and blaming me for white privilae or enslaving blacks, latinos or Native Americans." I wasn't pulling out the race card. I was just wondering if you were. Usually people just say pedestal and don't add a color to it. So I got confused. K? You do realize just how much a fool you continue to make yourself, right? 2. I'm American. Born and raised. Once again, you just continue to make a fool of yourself. I really can't tell if you are forreal or if you're a troll cause this is some funny stuff. I love how you try to say you're not racist yet you make these racist comments about people... Try again.

[Echelon333]

Everytime I read a reply from the asker to someones opinion.. Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth? Please stop replying.. everytime you reply your iq (not sure if you have any after reading all your replies lol) drops a little and I'm sure now it is under 0.. I thought you were like like that just to the male opinions then i scroll down and damn, started laughing again hahhahha

[Matchmaker7072]

I seriously think Op is a troll.

[existing_not_living]

@Echelon333 Lol, I know right? I'm still laughing about her last response to me.

[existing_not_living]

@Matchmaker7072 They must be cause the level of stupidity that is seen in both her question description and her replies to peoples opinions is just so high. I mean, I know many people in this world are ignorant, but she takes it to a whole other level.

[DarkEmblem]

If I ever saw my girlfriend kissing some other GUYS and GIRLS (even more than one wtf) and told me it was just because of a game, I'd immediately push the person away from my life. If you cannot see whats wrong with kissing other people while in a relationship, you are missing some common sense. This is a complete no-no.

[Gman77]

Thank you!!! Couldn't agree more. (hint: I'm the person that brought her to school up top)... Lol.

[godfatherfan]

Because you cheated on him. WTF? do you really not see that?
what if he just walked down the street kissing the women? I don't think you would like it. I love when people cheat then try and blame it on other things. Oh, it wasn't me, it was the bottle. That MADE me kiss someone other then my SO.
sorry babe, you chose to kiss other people. Man or woman, gay or not. But my guess is the guys are the issue. My ex once asked if she could kiss a friend once. I said only 1 x and I had to be able to watch. but not more then 1x and never without me present. Even that made me feel uneasy. Luckily she never did it.
of course her fucking the woman's husband was more the issue but that happened later.

[Asker]

a girl friend?

[Asker]

female?

[Berethor]

You did sexual things with many people without your boyfriend permission so it's still cheating as well as slutty, the game excuse don't worth much, you shouldn't play that stupid game in the first place.

[Sebastian25]

I agree that is cheating i would never do that to someone i was in a relationship with its common sense do you want him kissing other girls?

[Koneko]

"Why am I wrong..."

You're wrong because you cheated on him. I don't understand how you're confused about this.

[Gman77]

You definetely cheated, I just had a talk with my girlfriend because she was kissed by another guy and didn't set her boundary properpyl. You most definetly cheated according to me and this other user. Almost anyone besides an immature college student would find that as cheating. It's just common sense.

[Asker]

If he has a problem with the way us American girls like to have fun he can always go back to Mexico and find himself a traditional girl. I'm sick of his romantic latin-lover goody boy scouts behavior. He likes to play the victim. Also why are you going to let 1 kiss come between your girlfriend and you, you are being to limiting, why don't you learn to have fun. Life is short. Its not like she had sex, sex is different

[Gman77]

I forgot to add how confused you are. You deserve every bit of what he has done, I recommend you seek professional help on how relationships should be. Perhaps talk to a counselor at your college or a therapist so you can get the help you deeply deserve. No one should be this confused.

[Asker]

Maybe you need to learn to be less jealous and stop being so sensitive. Maybe you should go to mexico and find a traditional girl also

[Gman77]

American girls? Wow... You really are all those things he said. Real relationships have boundaries and it's why her and I talked. Actually, right now your in denial and quite frankly trying to justify your actions when everyone else agrees with everything that he said. Me and my girlfriend have plenty of fun without going to college parties. Life is short right? When you make a stupid choice and your life changes forever, don't cry to us on here.

[Gman77]

Maybe you should learn the definition of love. Sure I'm jealous, any normal person would be. Good luck in your life, like I said... Get some counseling. Sounds like you could really use it, pretty sure everyone else here agrees.

[Asker]

not everyone agreed with what my ex boyfriend said, some guy said he over reacted so eat your own words you over sensative shakespearian romeo and juleith traditional fuck face, college is for fun and life is for fun. A kiss should not ruin a relationship. No one had sex, as long as its a game or just kissing no harm done

[Asker]

If that makes you a jealous person, you are a controlling person and you probably manipulate people or the girls you date.

[Gman77]

So funny you say that. I don't have to be controlling, because I love the person and trust the one I'm with. Why would I manipulate someone over a 16 month relationship? Doesn't make sense? Lol... Your comments are funny though.

[Asker]

2 other people agreed with me, the one guy said my ex shows possesive traits and the anonymous girl thinks "why is he mad, its just a game" so you're little theory that everyone agrees with you just flew out the window, obviously these people have a better understanding then you

[Asker]

I woudnt be surprise if you are one of those people who still lives at home with his parents, he was 21 and still lived at home so I should have seen it coming a mile away how pathetic he was

[godfatherfan]

Don't try and drag all "American girls" into your cheating ways. I only date white American women and none of them went around sticking their tongues down other people's throat at a party. EVERYONE has blasted you and called you out for cheating yet you can't admit it and say you were wrong. You owe your ex an apology. I guess your going to be ok with any of your future boyfriends getting blow jobs from any women they meet. I mean that isn't sex, that is just American women being loose and having fun gar galling cum.

[Echelon333]

Gman, no she's not in denial lol In denial is someone who actually cares about the other person and when they do smth like this they end up alone, and they feel really bad and guilty about it so they just deny whatever happened and that it's not their fault ofc.. This "woman" doesn't care for her ex as we can see from her many replies, and maybe didn't even care at all for him! To asker.. Yes life is short we all know it bla bla, but.. WHY the fuck do you even start a relationship with someone if your views on a relationship are so different? Yes we all know how to have fun, but without hurting the one we love -.- Stop being such a bitch to everyone and deal with it! Can't you see that everyone is telling you that you're wrong and he made the right decision breaking up, and mind you, they're telling you politely and you just reply "stop being such a bitch, man up" and insult them for expressing their opinion on a question you asked...

[BertMacklinFBI]

they don't give a fuck if its a game lol. all they will hear is "i kissed 4 boys"

and then they will justify it by calling you immature, like he did, for playing such a game.

per your update, it doesn't matter if you don't mind if he kisses another girl, bro you have to take his thoughts and feelings into consideration, you're both in this relationship together.

[Asker]

Sorry but if it would bother you that your girlfriend kissed other guys in a game then you are nothing but a jealous control freak. Sorry to break it to you, if you want a traditional girl maybe go to mexico, thats where my ex probably is since his donkey latin ass wants traditional who will never kiss someone else while being in a relationship, never going to date a latin guy again

[Sabretooth]

This is a pretty way of saying that the relationship meant nothing. Keep thinking this way, and the only guys that will have anything to do with you will be those looking for hook ups.

[YatoNoragami]

@Sabretooth My thoughts exactly

[Sabretooth]

@YatoNoragami regardlss of ethnicity... or even gender for that matter.

[BertMacklinFBI]

you have failed to elicit an emotional response out of me, you have 2 more attempts @asker :P

[Soshy]

I'm hoping and praying this is a troll. If not, I feel sorry for you OP. You are in the wrong unless you are in an open relationship (which you clearly aren't), then what you did is considered as cheated. Your boyfriend or should I say ex boyfriend didn't agree to sharing you with other people. It's a game yes but my first thoughts would be '' i have a boyfriend so there are certain things I won't be doing ''. I would also openly tell the people I'm with so they understand that I love and respect my boyfriend, and I wouldn't do anything to hurt him. I would pass on kissing anyone male or female, why? Because it is cheating. I would dump any guy that did this to me. I hope you have learned something from this experience. Also, it's okay for you to kiss other women but if he kissed other men you would have an issue. You need to grow up.

[FemWorship]

When, if ever, he grows up he'll attend socials & dances where good friends kiss - it's high society european & world wide, not to mention Hollywood.

Kissing can be intimate but also a parallel to
I love you vs. bye, love

The next level up is touching "private parts"

Then of course, sex

That's how removed you are from cheating.

Now let's discuss the relationship
has he proposed? Not even close to marriage?
Then you are free to date and do whatever with whomever.

Does he feel he has a master slave relationship and you wear a collar & leash?
No? Then how are you breaking the rules?

What IS this really about?
HIS insecurity, HIS inability to compete with others, HIS lack of desire to step up the romance to assure a lock on this relationship.
Instead, he does the lazy & distateful action of making YOU the bad guy (not him).
If he usually turns the facts around on you, why would anyone want an eternal life with such a mentalist prison guard? He is not speaking words of love and understanding. He is speaking words of control, reform and making you feel bad about yourself (= hate).

Although such a party may not be your cup of tea, it happens... often planned by a secret admirer or one wanting to break your boyfriend away so they can have a shot at you.
You are free to live your life until you commit to the rules of marriage that often a couple can modify.

[TripleAce]

Its fine if you think its ok to kiss others. I mean swingers exist for a reason. But thats outliers and then you should find someone who accepts that. But dont be surprised if he has sex with another girl and tells you thats not cheating.

At the end of the day, you did cheat

[Chief16]

Well you had it coming.
sanguines.files.wordpress.com/.../sense_cheats.jpg
Sorry bro, all's fair in love and war.

[oldanddecrepid]

Have to go with the general consensus and your boyfriend on that one... your a little old for playing those types of games when you supposedly in a relationship.

I would see it as untrustworthy and likely cut you loose.

[NerdInDenial]

Was a make out session or just a quick kiss?

[Asker]

just a kiss

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

It does not matter, its still cheating. It would be different if he was cool with it because if both parties are in agreement with something then fair game. He was not cool with it and in the context of most people, most people would be bothered by that, especially if the relationship is romantic and loving as apposed to just casually affectionate.

[SomeoneImportant]

Not many guys would be ok with it.

You may not agree with his reasoning for being upset, but at least understand it

I mean, some people see simple flirting as cheating. And you go sticking your tongue in a fella lol

He could've not been such a bitch about it, but in terms of what he sees as cheating, you're in the wrong here.

[Asker]

At least we can agree on him being a bitch

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

What the hell makes him a bitch? Being honest about his feeling, realizing that this is something he would not be able to tolerate and move on with his life. How is that being a bitch. He stood his ground and for his values.

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah You're being a bitch, stop being so emotional and man up. He was way to sensative about things, I thought girls were sensative but man, he needs to grow a pair, and apperently so do you

[Asker]

@Gman77 this guy think my ex was a bitch, see even guys agree with me

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

I want to know what makes him a a bitch? Being honest about his feeling, realizing that this is something he would not be able to tolerate and move on with his life. How is that being a bitch. He stood his ground and for his values, if you are ok with a girl doing that to you then power to you and be happy, nothing wrong with that. But if these are the standard a guy or a girl have that does not make him/her a bitch or a pussy. You need to take a seat and get off your high horse on calling him a bitch frat boy

[Echelon333]

"Men up bitch", "Men need to be relaxed" Hahahahahah what the hell is going through that tiny brain of yours, I'm really curios!! :D So we should just let our girlfriends go to parties and kiss 7 people (the fucking gender doesn't matter it's the same) and be relaxed about it after it? Oh but it was just a game baabe we were playing spin the bottle, you know like the 13-14 year olds play today, you get me honeeyy? Stop blaming your ex for something that you fucked up and leave him alone to enjoy life without a bitch like you! GL in the future! Have fun

[SomeoneImportant]

@Stumpy_Cheetah Didn't say he was a bitch, but his reaction was bitch. He doesn't approve, that's fine. But it seems he started crying like a school girl who found out her boyfriend hugged another girl. Should've just disregarded her completely, just say "You're down with kidding other people? Fair enough, but I'm not, so I'm out" There's too many girls in the world to start crying over just one.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

His reaction was not bitch either, he is entitled to react by crying if thats what he did. The girl says he needs to man up, screw that. Thats just sexist behavior, only girls are allowed to cry and whine but when a guy does it he is being a bitch, sorry but his behavior is not not bitch either.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

You said he started crying like a school girl who found out her boyfriend hugged another girl. So what? That does not make him a bitch, and it was not a hug it was a kiss, with multiple people. Also again a school girl? Feels like sexism, only girls can feel this way, when a guy does it, he is being a bitch or his behavior is bitch

[SomeoneImportant]

@Stumpy_Cheetah He was absolutely being a bitch, there's a certain pride you gotta have as a man. There's definitely acceptable times to get emotional, but shit like that is not one of them. He needed to have some balls in that scenario

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

An acceptable time to be emotional is to express them when you feel them. And the acceptable time is pretty subjective, if a person feels like expressing them, man or woman they should be able to and that does not make him being a bitch, ok. What pride as a man? Its 2015, stop living in the stone age, the same way we are trying to treat woman with equality, we should also treat men with equality. If a woman is allowed to be emotional without judgement so is a man. There is no male pride, its an outdated thing. Also same with abuse, men can be abused by woman also and if a man is being abused by his girlfriend that does not make him a bitch or him being a bitch. I think it can be important to be strong or remain strong but at the same time we are only human, we feel and sometimes we express. Also he walked away, moved on and didn't roll over for her. I think thats brave, some guys will let their girlfriend walk all over them and they will compormise their own bealifs or values

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah why don't you stop being a bitch ok. And stop being a fucking SPIC, go back to mexico if you like traditional

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

For the last time I'm not Mexican, I'm from South America and why the racism? Seriously why do you need to call me a Spic?

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah 1st of all I'm not racist, I dated a Mexican and you're being a spic because you're behaving like one. For example someone can behave like a ass but it does not make them as ass. So the same logic, you are behaving like a spic, I didn't call you a Spic, I just said stop being a Spic.

[Asker]

I'm not surprised you call me racist, all you minorities just like black people also like to constantly pull out a race card and use it when its beneficial. Just stop

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

I'm calling you racist because you are using terms like Spic and go back to Mexico. 1st of all I'm not sitting here saying honkey or cracker or white devil. I'm not insulting your race

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah Whatever, go back to Mexico bean dip, find yourself a brown girl burrito donkey grasshopper. Thats where you belong

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

You know I'm a citizen right? I'm American just like you and am legal here, I don't need to go back anywhere

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah So what? Your people aren't from here, you guys came form somewhere else, so even if you are legal or born here, that does not make you part of this land, you still have your original land go back there, thats all I'm saying

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

Are you like a special kind of stupid? By that logic why don'y you go back to Europe, this Land belongs to Native Americans so why don'y you go back to Europe if you want to use that kind of logic, don't claim ownership if you don't even understand or are willing to recognize Americas past

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah I hate it when people bring up Native Amercians, guess what, they lost, sorry not my fault. besides, they should be happy we didn't kill them all. At least they stuck around and got to see America become of the most powerful Nations. Black people should be happy for slavery, if slavery never happened they would be in Africa today chasing wild tigers and lions. Slavery was bad but at least it got them here and now we have a black president so you know they should be thankful at least, and so should Natives

[SomeoneImportant]

@Stumpy_Cheetah You seem to also have that delusional idea of equality. Men and women are not equal, never will be. Two completely different beings. Treating both the same will eliminate masculinity and femininity. Why do we like women? Because they're not us. They're more caring and emotionally available than us. Why do women like us? We can be dominant, a protector, masculine, not react emotionally when in a situation that makes others panic. Our differences and inequality is what makes things work.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

What about some gay men who adopt a more feminine personality? Or some lesbians who adopt a more masculine personality? Are they wrong for that? Does it make the gay dude a bitch for acting like "A girl" more emotional etc?

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

Or his behavior bitch like

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

I'm not saying that there aren't biological differences between woman and men, but environment and social construct play a role also. If being tough and not reacting emotionally was a objective biological component then why do some men still act the opposite? Why does it feel real to them and unable to suppress? Also what about woman who are dominant? What about those woman who like sensitive fragile guys who are emotional? What I'm saying is that it is not a 100% sure objective factor. Biology can play a part, the chemical make up inside the brain, nature and nature. Biologically speaking its perfectly normal for some men to feel emotional and to react. No need to call me delusional and no need to call those who react like him being a bitch

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

I already said there can be differences but we should still treat people equally, when men get rape we should take that as serious as a woman getting raped. Double Standards are very ignorant and dangerous and by you saying people who behave like him are being a bitch just shows you lack empathy for people who feel that or who can't help to react that way. Empathy is also an evolutionary trait for many reasons, cooperation helps species survive, when animals/humans compete they tend to fail a lot more.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

He has every right to react the way he did and to express himself the way he felt, he was hurt and cheated on and its normal. He does not have to prove anything.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

Again you are not taking into account those who don't fit the stereotypical gender roles. the woman who are not emotional and the men who are, the men who are not fighters and the woman who are. or the men that are better carers then the mother themselves. What about those men who stay at home and the woman work instead. Gender roles are a lot more complicated then that, and it does not make him a bitch for feeling a way he can't control. If men were objectively not supposed to be emotional then men would not feel it. Historically the reason a lot of men tend to not show emotion is because its expected of them, not because they don't feel it, a lot of it is a social construct. If it wasn't for the social contract that society enforces many men would be more open and in touch with their emotion. If you don't believe me read up n the issue, the biological components to it and the nature vs nurture, social constructs, etc

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

the very fact that you onto of that have to use a slur and call him behavior bitch just shows how sexist you are, I'm sorry but you come off as a typical frat boy

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

Anyways I'm done, most people here agree with him so I don't feel like I'm in the wrong for understanding how he reacted and not seeing his behavior as being a bitch. Its people like you that make it hard for men to express their emotions and to suppress them and to be numb to it, because men are tough that they aren't allowed to express it or that they shouldn't. These things makes us HUMAN, its a HUMAN BEHAVIOR. If the gender roles are as if what you say then men wouldn't feel it. What you think men who become emotional want to feel hurt on purpose, no they react to the feelings they develop. They can't help it and if they react to it they can't help it either, just like many woman can't help reacting to it. It is not bitchy for a men to feel and to express any more then it makes a girl a Dike if she wants to be a boxer or a fighter. (traditionally fighting has been seen as a more masculine thing) Some girls out there are stronger and better fighters then the average man.

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

Anyways good bye and good day, I hope you can reconsider on how you view and treat people in his position who express themselves the way they do. Bye

[BR0CK]

Isn't spin the bottle for middle schoolers?

[squeelz]

What does his race have to do with you being a cheater if he kissed another chick I bet you would feel some type of way

[Octavius]

It is cheating and he is right to feel hurt. I've never heard of adults playing spin the bottle. You should just leave him alone because your ethical values are polar opposites with his.

[Tormentarian]

Dump him, he is a tyrant, come lets kiss...

[Boston_Dylan]

He should have broken up with you only for being a 21 year old that still plays "Spin the Bottle"...

[CaliSoccerFella]

He seemed to way over react...

[Asker]

someone gets it

[CaliSoccerFella]

lets play spin the bottle then lol Kidding kidding haha ;)

[Asker]

so you agree that my ex and people who agree with my ex are just being pussys, boy scouts, or overly butt hurt jealous control freaks ;)

[CaliSoccerFella]

certainly! I can say a bit more but not sure if i outta do so here or private :P lol

[Asker]

DO it here, live a little ;), I think everyone who agrees with my ex is being a pussy butt hurt pussy, my ex was being a bitch and a cry baby little girl

[Asker]

My ex was mexican and if he wants a girl whos more traditional he can go back to mexico and find himself a traditional woman, he needs to learn this is America and us American girls like to have fun and to be more open and relaxed about things, not going to tolorate his cultural difference or ignorance

[CaliSoccerFella]

it was a sense less game that obviously from my (likes/dislikes) no one agrees with me haha most dislikes ever!

[ArtDent]

of course it's cheating. What's the point of asking us?

[Asker]

not cheating, I didn't sleep with them, you're just being a little girl like my ex, stop being overly sensative,

[ArtDent]

only a complete slut thinks that you have to have intercourse to cheat. Find a new boyfriend, one who doesn't mind how many tongues you suck behind his back :)

[Asker]

Stop being a control freak and realize that kissing isn't cheating, especially if its just a game. If you want a traditinal girl go to mexico like my ex boyfreind, his forgein ass like traditional but then comes to america and expect trational values, fuck him, he can find his dream donkey back in mexico where he belongs. Plenty of woman with boundaries and traditional expectation in relationships.

[ArtDent]

So these kisses, they were on genitals, weren't they?

[Asker]

He needs to learn that American woman are more relaxed and if you can't learn that then maybe you belong in mexico also

[ArtDent]

You can suck whatever you want, it doen't mean anybody has to think you're worth having as a girlfriend.

[Echelon333]

He knows now that 'murican girls are more relaxed don't worry (I know there are exceptions ofc) So now you can go looking for more relaxed guys than your bitchy ex right? (even though you've spent 2 years together you insult him right away, that alone says a lot about you and your fucked up murican relaxed mind) Let's all hope he actually does find another girl (praying that it's not the kind of girl like the asker herself :S)

[Matchmaker7072]

" I tried explaining to him that it was not a big deal" maybe for you. Sounds like he made the right move not because of playing kiss the bottle but your lack of empathy. Did it ever occur to you that it might be a big deal to someone other then yourself in fact most people?

[Asker]

sorry but I am not going to have empathy on someone reacting like a emotional woman, he needs to man up and grow a pair

[Matchmaker7072]

Or date someone who is not a condescending bitch. one or the other. Take it as a blessing and disguise because you two are clearly not compatible.

[Asker]

I'm not a condescending bitch you stupid cancer fuck, I bet your ugly mom is very proud of you right now, check your self before calling me a condescending bitch you cock sucking fucker

[Stumpy_Cheetah]

Fuck you, you don't call him mom ugly you fucking bitch, leave his mom out of this

[Asker]

@Stumpy_Cheetah I'll call his mom whatever I want to, he called me a condesending bitch, whatever, I bet his mom is a dumb fuck, I hope she falls off a cliff, fuck matchmakers mom

[TheWorldEndsWithYou]

What does being Mexican have to do with it? Stop descrediting what he thought was wrong based on his ethinic background, that's got to be one of the dumbest things I ever heard. Can't handle us American girls... Oh god

[theegreat017]

I would break up with you definitely.

[Sabretooth]

it is cheating. it's an intimate act.

[frederikwinter]

You have to made the decisions, not he. I think he is jealous. Let him go. If he really loves you, he will come back.

[Bjavhs]

You must be ill. The game is a disguise to kiss people idiot. What's worse is you kissed a girl is fine but him kissing a Guy isn't? Either your both weird or none.

[That_guy11]

It was just a quick kiss, right? Not a make out session. If it was just a quick kiss, then I see nothing wrong with it, especially as it wasn't in sexual context to me.

[Anonymous]

Sorry but I stand with your ex on this one. You kissed someone, I don't care if it was a dare or not, you did it. You cheated. No one grabbed you and made you kiss another person besides yourself. Think how he feels, the love of his life willing kissed other people. Like what?

[Asker]

He needs to grow a pair and be a man and stop being a sensative little girl, it was just a kiss and if it seriously would bother you that your boyfriend or whatever kissed someone in a game then you're being stupid for letting a kiss ruin a relationship and you deserve to feel bad

[Opinion Owner]

I don't care whether or not you think he needs to "man up"; you still cheated, you broke his trust. End of story

[gray_sailor]

To the asker: The kissing did not ruin the relationship. Your lack of respect for your ex boyfriend ruined the relationship. That lack of respect was always there but laid hidden from view. Now that a conflict has come up, your true colors are shown for all to see. Calling your ex a: "sensitive girl" "bitch" "pussy" who needs to: "grow some balls" or "man up" The above proves positively that you have zero respect for you ex and likely never had any to begin with. As such, a relationship with you is not so much something to lose as something to be rid of.

[Anonymous]

Your atleaat 25 meaning your atleaat 10 year to old to be playing spin the bottle and unless you and your boyfriend have a open relationship you cheated

[Anonymous]

lol 21 and still playing spin the bottle? yes kissing is cheating. you are immature and a cheater i would have broken up with you too

[Anonymous]

1st of all I'm Latino so don't go dissing the Latin people. 2nd of all there are a lot of Americans that believe in traditional relationships that are committed and set boundaries, Hey if you are into open relationships, thats ok, but don't drag people who want something serious, committed with boundaries into your lifestyle. He has every right to be hurt and you have no right to say he is being a pussy boy scout for wanted a type of relationship, you're being an asshole and a bit racist. He does not need to go back to mexico to find a traditional person, they're are plenty of them in America. And yeah the kissing the girl thing even thought you're 100% straight but would not mind making out if you're drunk enough or hot enough is a little confusing, but I support gay people so no judgement there but the way you explain it seems confusing.

[Gman77]

I'm a white male, I support boundaries. I couldn't agree with you more.

[Asker]

Sorry but most Americans I know are pretty relaxed and would not break up with someone over a kiss, obviously you Latins are more Romantic or Traditional with those type of things. Get off your latin lover horse and smell the coffee. Its just us having fun. And I'm not racist but if he wants a traditional girl he should go to mexico and so should you if thats what you want, whatever makes you happy.

[Opinion Owner]

I'm not mexican dumbass, I'm from south America

[Opinion Owner]

And why is race/ethnicity making its way into the conversation, its irrelevant to how he feels, a lot of Americans, no matter what race or ethnicity would have problem with what you did

[Asker]

Whatever, you are all Mexican for all I care, anyways race plays a part because some cultures have cultural behavior more than others. It just seems Latin men and woman have more boundaries than American people like me

[Gman77]

Sounds like to me your a total fucking racist. Go look at my picture, I'm as white as can be... You claim it's some cultural/traditional thing when really it's called being normal. Not a stuck up college bitch.

[Opinion Owner]

@Gman77 thanks fan

[Opinion Owner]

*fam

[Echelon333]

Hahhahahaahahhaha damn you asker hahahahha I'm actually laughing at every reply of yours damn! How can someone be so stupid and retarded, please don't reproduce and stop polluting the air around you! Fun fact "If you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid!"

[Anonymous]

He sounds like he's overreacting. I agree I don't think you should've played. 1. Because college students playing spin the bottle is kinda weird and 2. Because it's not really a game for people in relationships. A simple no could've got you out of it. I would've been a little upset but your boyfriend took it to the extreme. Personally it sounds like he's been looking for a reason to break up and just used this as his exit strategy. Because his reaction does not match the incident at all.

[Asker]

Well at least someone gets it, he's just being a pussy and a sensitive little girl

[Opinion Owner]

Pussies literally pass things the size of bowling balls into this world. It's not really a very good insult lol they're sturdy as fuck. But I agree he is being overly sensitive.

[Asker]

thank you seriously, he's being a fucking foreign donkey

[Asker]

not to be racist, I mean donkey as in not thinking rationally, thinking like an animal

[Opinion Owner]

I'm a black guy who grew up in Alabama. I'm numb to racism.

[ArtDent]

Taking it to the extreme would be to get violent with the people involved. Dumping a slut isn't 'extreme'.

[Opinion Owner]

She kissed someone one time unromantically while drunk on a dare. It's not really a huge deal. You could literally say I'm not cool with that. It makes me upset please don't do it again. And be done with it. Maybe I date a totally different caliber of girls than you but this is definetly not "slutty" behavior in my book.

[ArtDent]

Oh I get it, you think she's telling the truth.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah. I mean if she is lying I don't give a shit cause it doesn't effect me in the slightest. So I choose to assume she's telling the truth because it doesn't make much sense for her to fabricate this whole story just to trick a bunch of random strangers on the internet

[Anonymous]

No matter how you explain it. It's cheating. You shouldn't have put yourself in that position to play that game knowing you're going to kiss someone.