Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health Is spinning the bottle game cheating, my boyfriend broke up with me?
Anonymous
Were both 21 and I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and everything has been great. Last week I went to a party with college students and they were playing spin the bottle and I played and kissed 4 guys and 3 girls. I'm not gay by the way, I'm 100% straight but the rules of the game were that if you are a woman you have to kiss whoever it lands on no matter if they are a guy or a girl. But if you are a guy and it lands on another guy you don't have to do it and can spin again till it lands on a girl. Not sure why the rules were like that but it was. I'm 100% straight but I woudn't mind making out with a girl if I was drunk enough or if she was hot enough just for fun haha Anyways I ended up kissing 4 guys and 3 girls, it didn't mean anything, it was just a game. When I told my boyfriend he got upset, hurt, and I tried explaining to him that it was not a big deal, that it was just for fun. He claimed I cheated on him, he said he would never do that to me. He also said "what if I became a porn star, had sex with woman and claimed, it doesn't mean anything, its just doing my job" and he started saying "what are you now bi, how do you kiss a gender for fun even though you are not atracted to them" and I tried explaning its not impossible and that and even thought I'm 100% straight, I woudn't mind making out with a girl if I was drunk enough or if she was hot enough just for fun and that made him angrier and said that I was a immature child, a sorority cunt and he broke up with me and left. He also said the very least I should have done was tell him before actually doing it so that way he could have made a decision on whether or not this is something he tolorates, its just that I never thought it would be a big deal to bring up. When I asked him why didn't he ever ask me where we stood on kissing other people he said "well geez, i dont know, it just seemed like commn sense that kissing another person che
Updates:
+1 y
Continued... When I asked him why didn't he ever ask me where we stood on kissing other people he said "well geez, i dont know, it just seemed like common sense that kissing another person cheating" Anyways he broke up with me, and I tried calling him, texting him and he changed him number, blocked me from facebook. Why am I wrong, I mean its just having fun, he has to live a little and stop being so jealous
+1 y
I would not mind if he was kissing another girl during spin the bottle, if he kissed a guy during spin the bottle that would bother me, because its weird. But yeah I would nto get jealous. And at least I was honest, it just goes to show you that being honest has consequences. He needs to grow up and smell the coffee. Maybe its because he's hispanic so he comes from a different culture, but if thats the case he needs to let go of his traditional latin culture, its America, let loose, GOD
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What Girls & Guys Said
15 33Was a make out session or just a quick kiss?
just a kiss
It does not matter, its still cheating. It would be different if he was cool with it because if both parties are in agreement with something then fair game. He was not cool with it and in the context of most people, most people would be bothered by that, especially if the relationship is romantic and loving as apposed to just casually affectionate.
Not many guys would be ok with it.
You may not agree with his reasoning for being upset, but at least understand it
I mean, some people see simple flirting as cheating. And you go sticking your tongue in a fella lol
He could've not been such a bitch about it, but in terms of what he sees as cheating, you're in the wrong here.
At least we can agree on him being a bitch
What the hell makes him a bitch? Being honest about his feeling, realizing that this is something he would not be able to tolerate and move on with his life. How is that being a bitch. He stood his ground and for his values.
@Stumpy_Cheetah You're being a bitch, stop being so emotional and man up. He was way to sensative about things, I thought girls were sensative but man, he needs to grow a pair, and apperently so do you
@Gman77 this guy think my ex was a bitch, see even guys agree with me
I want to know what makes him a a bitch? Being honest about his feeling, realizing that this is something he would not be able to tolerate and move on with his life. How is that being a bitch. He stood his ground and for his values, if you are ok with a girl doing that to you then power to you and be happy, nothing wrong with that. But if these are the standard a guy or a girl have that does not make him/her a bitch or a pussy. You need to take a seat and get off your high horse on calling him a bitch frat boy
"Men up bitch", "Men need to be relaxed" Hahahahahah what the hell is going through that tiny brain of yours, I'm really curios!! :D So we should just let our girlfriends go to parties and kiss 7 people (the fucking gender doesn't matter it's the same) and be relaxed about it after it? Oh but it was just a game baabe we were playing spin the bottle, you know like the 13-14 year olds play today, you get me honeeyy? Stop blaming your ex for something that you fucked up and leave him alone to enjoy life without a bitch like you! GL in the future! Have fun
@Stumpy_Cheetah Didn't say he was a bitch, but his reaction was bitch. He doesn't approve, that's fine. But it seems he started crying like a school girl who found out her boyfriend hugged another girl. Should've just disregarded her completely, just say "You're down with kidding other people? Fair enough, but I'm not, so I'm out" There's too many girls in the world to start crying over just one.
His reaction was not bitch either, he is entitled to react by crying if thats what he did. The girl says he needs to man up, screw that. Thats just sexist behavior, only girls are allowed to cry and whine but when a guy does it he is being a bitch, sorry but his behavior is not not bitch either.
You said he started crying like a school girl who found out her boyfriend hugged another girl. So what? That does not make him a bitch, and it was not a hug it was a kiss, with multiple people. Also again a school girl? Feels like sexism, only girls can feel this way, when a guy does it, he is being a bitch or his behavior is bitch
@Stumpy_Cheetah He was absolutely being a bitch, there's a certain pride you gotta have as a man. There's definitely acceptable times to get emotional, but shit like that is not one of them. He needed to have some balls in that scenario
An acceptable time to be emotional is to express them when you feel them. And the acceptable time is pretty subjective, if a person feels like expressing them, man or woman they should be able to and that does not make him being a bitch, ok. What pride as a man? Its 2015, stop living in the stone age, the same way we are trying to treat woman with equality, we should also treat men with equality. If a woman is allowed to be emotional without judgement so is a man. There is no male pride, its an outdated thing. Also same with abuse, men can be abused by woman also and if a man is being abused by his girlfriend that does not make him a bitch or him being a bitch. I think it can be important to be strong or remain strong but at the same time we are only human, we feel and sometimes we express. Also he walked away, moved on and didn't roll over for her. I think thats brave, some guys will let their girlfriend walk all over them and they will compormise their own bealifs or values
@Stumpy_Cheetah why don't you stop being a bitch ok. And stop being a fucking SPIC, go back to mexico if you like traditional
For the last time I'm not Mexican, I'm from South America and why the racism? Seriously why do you need to call me a Spic?
@Stumpy_Cheetah 1st of all I'm not racist, I dated a Mexican and you're being a spic because you're behaving like one. For example someone can behave like a ass but it does not make them as ass. So the same logic, you are behaving like a spic, I didn't call you a Spic, I just said stop being a Spic.
I'm not surprised you call me racist, all you minorities just like black people also like to constantly pull out a race card and use it when its beneficial. Just stop
I'm calling you racist because you are using terms like Spic and go back to Mexico. 1st of all I'm not sitting here saying honkey or cracker or white devil. I'm not insulting your race
@Stumpy_Cheetah Whatever, go back to Mexico bean dip, find yourself a brown girl burrito donkey grasshopper. Thats where you belong
You know I'm a citizen right? I'm American just like you and am legal here, I don't need to go back anywhere
@Stumpy_Cheetah So what? Your people aren't from here, you guys came form somewhere else, so even if you are legal or born here, that does not make you part of this land, you still have your original land go back there, thats all I'm saying
Are you like a special kind of stupid? By that logic why don'y you go back to Europe, this Land belongs to Native Americans so why don'y you go back to Europe if you want to use that kind of logic, don't claim ownership if you don't even understand or are willing to recognize Americas past
@Stumpy_Cheetah I hate it when people bring up Native Amercians, guess what, they lost, sorry not my fault. besides, they should be happy we didn't kill them all. At least they stuck around and got to see America become of the most powerful Nations. Black people should be happy for slavery, if slavery never happened they would be in Africa today chasing wild tigers and lions. Slavery was bad but at least it got them here and now we have a black president so you know they should be thankful at least, and so should Natives
@Stumpy_Cheetah You seem to also have that delusional idea of equality. Men and women are not equal, never will be. Two completely different beings. Treating both the same will eliminate masculinity and femininity. Why do we like women? Because they're not us. They're more caring and emotionally available than us. Why do women like us? We can be dominant, a protector, masculine, not react emotionally when in a situation that makes others panic. Our differences and inequality is what makes things work.
What about some gay men who adopt a more feminine personality? Or some lesbians who adopt a more masculine personality? Are they wrong for that? Does it make the gay dude a bitch for acting like "A girl" more emotional etc?
Or his behavior bitch like
I'm not saying that there aren't biological differences between woman and men, but environment and social construct play a role also. If being tough and not reacting emotionally was a objective biological component then why do some men still act the opposite? Why does it feel real to them and unable to suppress? Also what about woman who are dominant? What about those woman who like sensitive fragile guys who are emotional? What I'm saying is that it is not a 100% sure objective factor. Biology can play a part, the chemical make up inside the brain, nature and nature. Biologically speaking its perfectly normal for some men to feel emotional and to react. No need to call me delusional and no need to call those who react like him being a bitch
I already said there can be differences but we should still treat people equally, when men get rape we should take that as serious as a woman getting raped. Double Standards are very ignorant and dangerous and by you saying people who behave like him are being a bitch just shows you lack empathy for people who feel that or who can't help to react that way. Empathy is also an evolutionary trait for many reasons, cooperation helps species survive, when animals/humans compete they tend to fail a lot more.
He has every right to react the way he did and to express himself the way he felt, he was hurt and cheated on and its normal. He does not have to prove anything.
Again you are not taking into account those who don't fit the stereotypical gender roles. the woman who are not emotional and the men who are, the men who are not fighters and the woman who are. or the men that are better carers then the mother themselves. What about those men who stay at home and the woman work instead. Gender roles are a lot more complicated then that, and it does not make him a bitch for feeling a way he can't control. If men were objectively not supposed to be emotional then men would not feel it. Historically the reason a lot of men tend to not show emotion is because its expected of them, not because they don't feel it, a lot of it is a social construct. If it wasn't for the social contract that society enforces many men would be more open and in touch with their emotion. If you don't believe me read up n the issue, the biological components to it and the nature vs nurture, social constructs, etc
the very fact that you onto of that have to use a slur and call him behavior bitch just shows how sexist you are, I'm sorry but you come off as a typical frat boy
Anyways I'm done, most people here agree with him so I don't feel like I'm in the wrong for understanding how he reacted and not seeing his behavior as being a bitch. Its people like you that make it hard for men to express their emotions and to suppress them and to be numb to it, because men are tough that they aren't allowed to express it or that they shouldn't. These things makes us HUMAN, its a HUMAN BEHAVIOR. If the gender roles are as if what you say then men wouldn't feel it. What you think men who become emotional want to feel hurt on purpose, no they react to the feelings they develop. They can't help it and if they react to it they can't help it either, just like many woman can't help reacting to it. It is not bitchy for a men to feel and to express any more then it makes a girl a Dike if she wants to be a boxer or a fighter. (traditionally fighting has been seen as a more masculine thing) Some girls out there are stronger and better fighters then the average man.
Anyways good bye and good day, I hope you can reconsider on how you view and treat people in his position who express themselves the way they do. Bye
Isn't spin the bottle for middle schoolers?
What does his race have to do with you being a cheater if he kissed another chick I bet you would feel some type of way
It is cheating and he is right to feel hurt. I've never heard of adults playing spin the bottle. You should just leave him alone because your ethical values are polar opposites with his.
Dump him, he is a tyrant, come lets kiss...
He should have broken up with you only for being a 21 year old that still plays "Spin the Bottle"...
He seemed to way over react...
someone gets it
lets play spin the bottle then lol Kidding kidding haha ;)
so you agree that my ex and people who agree with my ex are just being pussys, boy scouts, or overly butt hurt jealous control freaks ;)
certainly! I can say a bit more but not sure if i outta do so here or private :P lol
DO it here, live a little ;), I think everyone who agrees with my ex is being a pussy butt hurt pussy, my ex was being a bitch and a cry baby little girl
My ex was mexican and if he wants a girl whos more traditional he can go back to mexico and find himself a traditional woman, he needs to learn this is America and us American girls like to have fun and to be more open and relaxed about things, not going to tolorate his cultural difference or ignorance
it was a sense less game that obviously from my (likes/dislikes) no one agrees with me haha most dislikes ever!
of course it's cheating. What's the point of asking us?
not cheating, I didn't sleep with them, you're just being a little girl like my ex, stop being overly sensative,
only a complete slut thinks that you have to have intercourse to cheat. Find a new boyfriend, one who doesn't mind how many tongues you suck behind his back :)
Stop being a control freak and realize that kissing isn't cheating, especially if its just a game. If you want a traditinal girl go to mexico like my ex boyfreind, his forgein ass like traditional but then comes to america and expect trational values, fuck him, he can find his dream donkey back in mexico where he belongs. Plenty of woman with boundaries and traditional expectation in relationships.
So these kisses, they were on genitals, weren't they?
He needs to learn that American woman are more relaxed and if you can't learn that then maybe you belong in mexico also
You can suck whatever you want, it doen't mean anybody has to think you're worth having as a girlfriend.
He knows now that 'murican girls are more relaxed don't worry (I know there are exceptions ofc) So now you can go looking for more relaxed guys than your bitchy ex right? (even though you've spent 2 years together you insult him right away, that alone says a lot about you and your fucked up murican relaxed mind) Let's all hope he actually does find another girl (praying that it's not the kind of girl like the asker herself :S)
" I tried explaining to him that it was not a big deal" maybe for you. Sounds like he made the right move not because of playing kiss the bottle but your lack of empathy. Did it ever occur to you that it might be a big deal to someone other then yourself in fact most people?
sorry but I am not going to have empathy on someone reacting like a emotional woman, he needs to man up and grow a pair
Or date someone who is not a condescending bitch. one or the other. Take it as a blessing and disguise because you two are clearly not compatible.
I'm not a condescending bitch you stupid cancer fuck, I bet your ugly mom is very proud of you right now, check your self before calling me a condescending bitch you cock sucking fucker
Fuck you, you don't call him mom ugly you fucking bitch, leave his mom out of this
@Stumpy_Cheetah I'll call his mom whatever I want to, he called me a condesending bitch, whatever, I bet his mom is a dumb fuck, I hope she falls off a cliff, fuck matchmakers mom
What does being Mexican have to do with it? Stop descrediting what he thought was wrong based on his ethinic background, that's got to be one of the dumbest things I ever heard. Can't handle us American girls... Oh god
I would break up with you definitely.
it is cheating. it's an intimate act.
You have to made the decisions, not he. I think he is jealous. Let him go. If he really loves you, he will come back.
You must be ill. The game is a disguise to kiss people idiot. What's worse is you kissed a girl is fine but him kissing a Guy isn't? Either your both weird or none.
It was just a quick kiss, right? Not a make out session. If it was just a quick kiss, then I see nothing wrong with it, especially as it wasn't in sexual context to me.
Sorry but I stand with your ex on this one. You kissed someone, I don't care if it was a dare or not, you did it. You cheated. No one grabbed you and made you kiss another person besides yourself. Think how he feels, the love of his life willing kissed other people. Like what?
He needs to grow a pair and be a man and stop being a sensative little girl, it was just a kiss and if it seriously would bother you that your boyfriend or whatever kissed someone in a game then you're being stupid for letting a kiss ruin a relationship and you deserve to feel bad
I don't care whether or not you think he needs to "man up"; you still cheated, you broke his trust. End of story
To the asker: The kissing did not ruin the relationship. Your lack of respect for your ex boyfriend ruined the relationship. That lack of respect was always there but laid hidden from view. Now that a conflict has come up, your true colors are shown for all to see. Calling your ex a: "sensitive girl" "bitch" "pussy" who needs to: "grow some balls" or "man up" The above proves positively that you have zero respect for you ex and likely never had any to begin with. As such, a relationship with you is not so much something to lose as something to be rid of.
Your atleaat 25 meaning your atleaat 10 year to old to be playing spin the bottle and unless you and your boyfriend have a open relationship you cheated
lol 21 and still playing spin the bottle? yes kissing is cheating. you are immature and a cheater i would have broken up with you too
1st of all I'm Latino so don't go dissing the Latin people. 2nd of all there are a lot of Americans that believe in traditional relationships that are committed and set boundaries, Hey if you are into open relationships, thats ok, but don't drag people who want something serious, committed with boundaries into your lifestyle. He has every right to be hurt and you have no right to say he is being a pussy boy scout for wanted a type of relationship, you're being an asshole and a bit racist. He does not need to go back to mexico to find a traditional person, they're are plenty of them in America. And yeah the kissing the girl thing even thought you're 100% straight but would not mind making out if you're drunk enough or hot enough is a little confusing, but I support gay people so no judgement there but the way you explain it seems confusing.
I'm a white male, I support boundaries. I couldn't agree with you more.
Sorry but most Americans I know are pretty relaxed and would not break up with someone over a kiss, obviously you Latins are more Romantic or Traditional with those type of things. Get off your latin lover horse and smell the coffee. Its just us having fun. And I'm not racist but if he wants a traditional girl he should go to mexico and so should you if thats what you want, whatever makes you happy.
I'm not mexican dumbass, I'm from south America
And why is race/ethnicity making its way into the conversation, its irrelevant to how he feels, a lot of Americans, no matter what race or ethnicity would have problem with what you did
Whatever, you are all Mexican for all I care, anyways race plays a part because some cultures have cultural behavior more than others. It just seems Latin men and woman have more boundaries than American people like me
Sounds like to me your a total fucking racist. Go look at my picture, I'm as white as can be... You claim it's some cultural/traditional thing when really it's called being normal. Not a stuck up college bitch.
@Gman77 thanks fan
*fam
Hahhahahaahahhaha damn you asker hahahahha I'm actually laughing at every reply of yours damn! How can someone be so stupid and retarded, please don't reproduce and stop polluting the air around you! Fun fact "If you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid!"