Just found out my girlfriend had a threesome in college?

[Anonymous]

I dumped her and she thinks its a dumb reason to dump somebody. how do you feel about this.

[redeyemindtricks]

You should think VERY carefully and VERY thoroughly about •WHY• this is a deal-breaker for you.

I mean, look, I have a couple of similar deal-breakers. For instance, if I ever found out that a man had paid for sex in the past, I'd lose ALL attraction to him IMMEDIATELY, and I would absolutely have to end that relationship -- there's just no way I could get over that.

But, in my case, I can articulate the actual REASONS why I feel that way.
If a guy is willing to pay for sex with a prostitute, that means that he's OK with (1) fucking someone who doesn't *want* to fuck HIM, and, worse, (2) *still* fucking that person immediately after negotiating a price and paying cash... ugh.
If a guy is willing to go through with that, then that means he thinks about sex in a way that's fundamentally different from, and incompatible with, my own values. I absolutely abhor the thought of fucking someone who doesn't WANT me -- and I *demand* that my man feel the same way. That's not something I can compromise on.

It's also an instant deal-breaker / attraction-destroyer, for me, if a man has ever had a homosexual experience -- but, again, that's something I can explain. (Any non-heterosexual attraction, in my mind, cheapens or destroys the sheer beauty of attraction between a man and a woman -- it reduces that from pure awesomeness to just one item on a big "menu".)

Do you have ACTUAL REASONS for feeling the way you do? Reasons that extend beyond stupid shit like "she's a ho"? Yes, that's stupid shit.

Like, can you actually *articulate* how this goes against some fundamental core value of yours?

[Asker]

i dont date sluts. its thats easy. she is not good enough to be the mother of my children. you dont get to decide what a stupid reason is. i no longer respect her and i find her to be of low quality. also im not going to pay full price for damaged goods.

[redeyemindtricks]

Are you sure you aren't just envious because YOU've never had a threesome? Because that tends to be the deal, most of the time, with situations like this one -- the upset person is acting as though life has a scoreboard, and every score has to be tied.

[Asker]

nope not the reason at all. like i could be friends with benefits with her but she has no honor as a women. she's not good enough for me to commit to her.

[redeyemindtricks]

Well... it's not my job to convince you of anything, but, I'd suggest that you rethink yr definition of "honor".
Right now, it seems that you're using a definition that amounts to "honor = sexual inexperience". Which doesn't speak at all to her ACTUAL honor as a woman.

That definition should be more like what I wrote (in the mho opinion) here:
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1945941-how-when-a-girl-learns-to-be-a-woman

Also, dude -- more likely than anything else, yr standards of "purity" just make it more probable that you'll end up with a woman who just doesn't like sex very much, and/or withholds it and uses it as a weapon or bargaining chip.
Is that what you want?
If so, then, carry on with these "standards" of yours.
If not, rethink them.

[Asker]

its part of it. as a women she has no honor. as a person thats different. a slut could be a good person but would never make a good wife.

[warrior0345]

This is stupid how you would dump someone because of this what if they can't get sex any other way are they just supposed to sit and go crazy

[Prof_Don]

@warrior0345 lol at the Asker saying a woman has no honor because she fucked two guys at the same time! So ridiculous. Any girl he dates, he REALLY won't know ALL of her sexual history anyways. That "good girl" that he may date in the future, may have had an affair with a married man for several years.

[Asker]

@Prof_Don no she won't because i won't date her.

[redeyemindtricks]

@warrior0345 If a man isn't fundamentally disgusted by the thought of paying for sex, he's the wrong man for me. Even if he's sexually frustrated, the thought of PAYING for sex with a woman WHO DOESN'T WANT HIM... should still not appeal to him. Not at all. If it does, then, nope. It's over.

[Asker]

Thats fine. I have never paid for sex.

[Prof_Don]

To the Asker, then I sincerely advise you not to ask about a girl's sexual history. Most decent looking girls in their late teens and early 20s have plenty of sexual opportunities, and therefore will have decently robust sex lives (in experimentation as well as frequency of sex). Don't be one of those guys to ask an unnecessary question, then get mad about the answer.

[Asker]

@Prof_Don nobody is mad about the answer.

[Skinnyjason]

Not damaged, tried and tested!

[Prof_Don]

To the Asker; sometimes ignorance is bliss. I frankly don't want to know every detail of every sexual act my girlfriend has done. Digging up those skeletons is so unnecessary. That's all i'm saying. ✌️

[21Cowboy21]

Well said. If both partners have had lots it usually doesn't matter for either of them. Only when a power imbalance exists as one has and the other has not.

[Chirinéonmä]

Sounds like this is a bit of a dealbreaker for you. Either you're okay with it and she doesn't want to have more 3 ways, or you're not okay with it and/or she wants more 3 ways.

Honestly, I think it's always best to consider your girlfriend's past to be just that, the past. She's with you in the present because she chooses you now.

And she makes that choice weighted against knowing whatever was good in her past. So if she liked 3 ways, you must be pretty special.

But if it's important to you that this happened and you can't stop thinking about it then you might want to consider breaking up with her because you would prefer a more vanilla history.

That happened to a friend of mine. He dated her for a long time, but he could never forget she was in a threesome with 2 guys.

They broke up eventually.

Wishing you the best of luck.

[Asker]

why do women do these things if they know its going to affect their future. she says she loves me but how could a women ever expect a man like me to love a women like her.

[redeyemindtricks]

The problem is with "a man like you", not with "a woman like her". Some people just can't get over this stuff; others don't give a shit. You should know which camp you are in, and make decisions (and have discussions) accordingly. __ More importantly -- If this is yr attitude, you have NO RIGHT to be upset if yr girl lies her ass off about her sexual history. (It's not like you'd ever find out, anyway.)

[Asker]

@redeyemindtricks lying is bad in this context. I would have every right to be upset.

[CheerGirl38139]

I think you're an anonymous troll that made this up just to give you an opportunity to continually respond to answers with something to the effect of
"I dont date sluts".

So... if she is in fact really (which I don't believe) she's probably saying something similar to herself, like "good riddance".

[JuicyBrain]

I encourage any men to leave their girlfriend for the most stupid reasons ever. Why? More for the rest of us. If you judge a girl for these stupid little things, you'll find women who never had a threesome but are deeply flawed in many other ways. You can't find the perfect mate.

[Asker]

Im not looking for perfect. Im looking for not a slut.

[AustinMan]

I'm with her. It's really none of your business plus what's it matter? She was a curious young adult.

[Asker]

i dont date sluts.

[AustinMan]

She's not a slut. You're a judgmental fool who thinks that people don't have pasts. Grow up and join us real people out here.

[Asker]

the rest of you in a failing civilization? hahaha nope no thanks.

[samhradh_leannan]

Hey, if it's a deal breaker for you, it's a deal breaker for you. But unless she wanted to have more threesomes in the future and you weren't okay with that, I don't see any real reason for this singular past experience to cause any problems for your relationship. You'd better watch your step very carefully if you plan to judge other people's pasts this harshly.

[Asker]

her wanting threesomes or not is not something we even discussed.

[samhradh_leannan]

Seriously, you didn't even get that far with the conversation?

[Asker]

why would i need to know if she wants more threesomes? her doing this was a deal breaker in itself.

[samhradh_leannan]

But why? How does it affect you, or your relationship? Just because she did it once, that doesn't mean she'd do it again. Oh well. You clearly weren't invested in the relationship anyway, so it sounds like things worked out for the best.

[kittycat119]

Because he thinks something his girlfriend does b4 knowing him is his business

[Asker]

i dont care if she does it again or not. i just care that she did it in general. i dont date sluts. also yes i was invested which is why im so upset about this.

[kittycat119]

Clearly no as u r calling her a slut

[Bigboy915]

@kittycat119 Maybe he was invested in the relationship.. it just turns out she's a slut. Ok?

[samhradh_leannan]

@Bigboy915 And having one threesome in the past makes you a slut? Okay, if that's your opinion, that's your opinion. But when you truly care about someone, you don't label them as a slut and dump them without even bothering to get the whole story first. Maybe he thinks he was invested, but he clearly has no idea what true investment is.

[Asker]

yes having a threesome makes a women a slut.

[samhradh_leannan]

You have the right to decide what is a dealbreaker to you. But if you demand a partner with a flawless past, just make sure your own past is flawless.

[Bigboy915]

I see your point and agree with most of it but what would the whole story be? She decided to have a threesome. Story over. Her reasons for it are obviously purely sexual and that bothers this dude.

[samhradh_leannan]

@Bigboy915 How do you know what her reasons were? He didn't bother to find out, so we have no idea either. Maybe she didn't even enjoy it. We don't know how long ago it was, or what it meant to her, or why she did it, or how much she has changed since then. All we know is that it happened. Because he was obviously so invested in his relationship with her that on the first mention of one act in her past that he didn't love, he ran for the hills.

[Asker]

i didn't say flawless. a threesome is a huge fucking flaw.

[Asker]

@Bigboy915 who cares what the reason was. unless she was gang raped by two people then there is no reason that would make this acceptable.

[Asker]

all the questions you posed are of no significance. the fact that she willfully did it is the only thing that matters.

[samhradh_leannan]

Those questions do matter because they are the things you ask when a person you care about has done something that makes you unhappy. You have stopped looking at her as a person. That's your right, but I think it's a pretty unhealthy way to act in a relationship.

[Asker]

i care about her a lot. im just not going to make her my wife.

[samhradh_leannan]

Okay, that's clearly what you believe.

[kittycat119]

I love how he says he cares about her but is calling her all these horrible things because she did something B4 meeting him. Key word being b4 they met

[Asker]

@kittycat119 what does it matter. she wasted my time. i care for her but she's a piece of shit.

[samhradh_leannan]

She's a human being who had a sexual experience before even meeting you. If this is really how you feel, she's clearly better off without you anyway. But it's pretty silly of you to try to argue that you were invested in the relationship if you never even bothered to discuss the whole situation with her.

[samhradh_leannan]

How long had you been dating for when she told you this?

[ChaosKilledTheDinos]

Yeah, it's a dumb reason. It was in college, before your relationship. It's not like she cheated on you with these two other people. College is in part about finding yourself and becoming the person you want to be. You do that by experimenting, taking risks, trying new things, etc. She was just having fun and experimenting in college. This is before she got serious, figured out what she wanted, and CHOSE YOU to date. This is a pretty shallow and illogical reason to break up with her, unless this gets in the way of some REALLY important values you have.

[Asker]

she can't undo the past. she will always be a cheap slut in my eyes.

[Smmyskittles]

I won't ever do a 3some myself, but I don't see how it effects you *NOW*.
So, yeah, I think it's stupid that you dumped her for this.

What I'm learning from all of the men (like yourself) who judge a girl based on her past; is not to tell you about it.

Thanks for the lesson!

[Red_Arrow]

Not all guys are like this. Don't close yourself off from a good man. My wife told me things that affected here that helped me to better understand her. I accepted her completely and did not dig deeper into those things.

[Smmyskittles]

@Red_Arrow - You are likely an exception. Next guy isn't going to know anything about my past. This made my decision final. It's not even close to the first post I've seen like this on the site. smmfh.

[Red_Arrow]

I hope that when you get close enough to really know him that you will be able to discuss anything without fear of repercussions. And of course he must be the same.

[redeyemindtricks]

Ehhh, no reason to be so cagey, unless you *really* suck at reading people (which isn't the impression I get of you). There are a few personality traits that NO ONE can successfully hide. Three of them are: 1) Fundamental lack of confidence, 2) Attitude toward money/material things, 3) Attitude toward sex and sexual history. I mean, honestly, *any* conversation that relates AT ALL to these topics should give you sufficient information about how the boy feels. I have literally met 0 people in my entire life who didn't INSTANTLY reveal these three traits, in any substantial conversation that touched on them and/or in actions/facial expressions/etc. So, if he's the type who would dump you over something like this... it should take you all of about 15 seconds to figure that out. What you do *after* that point, tbh, is up to you. I wouldn't bother lying -- I'd rather just dump the fucker, because, honestly, who's got the time for a boy who primarily values women on the basis of "the

[redeyemindtricks]

packaging is still intact"? Hahah yeah right.

[Smmyskittles]

@redeyemindtricks - You saw the post about men who wouldn't wife up a woman if she's slept with a black man, right? Right then and there, I'd already started debating not telling the next man anything about my past. How many men judge a woman because of her number? Sooo many. I like to think I'm good at reading people. However, if I end up dating a guy for a while, and he turns out like Asker here... No lie, I will go ballistic. Not violent, but there will be yelling and excessive amounts of cussing. I really just don't want to waste my time.

[redeyemindtricks]

Just make up a story about a (fictional) girlfriend, who got all the way to the point of being engaged before her fiancé dropped this bomb on her, and left her (because of some threesome she'd had many years before meeting him). Look for his IMMEDIATE reaction. That will tell you 100.000000% of absolutely everything you need to know. Guys cannot fake the IMMEDIATE reaction.

[Smmyskittles]

@redeyemindtricks - You are a freaking genius. <3 <3 <3

[Asker]

it effects me because i can only have one wife. if that doesn't make sense to you then i dont know what will.

[Smmyskittles]

Asker - I can only have one husband. How many women have you slept with? Is it about 10? Oh no, that's too high for me. At this point, I'm extremely hostile about your stupidity on this and need to excuse myself.

[redeyemindtricks]

Also, don't forget that this is an internet board, and that internet boards do not represent a fair cross-section of average people. Compared to real life, Internet forums attract, proportionally, WAY more guys who are shy/introverted/socially awkward/sexually inexperienced, and WAY fewer guys who are the opposite. It's just the nature of posting shit on an anonymous forum. I mean, think about it -- this is a site where a *majority* of guys actually say that they prefer women with *zero* makeup on their face. Part of that is just that people here are so young (I think the median age here is 20 or 21)... but, most of it is that the kinds of guys who are intimidated by women are even MORE intimidated by a well-dressed, well-made-up woman. Obviously, it's not the same in the real world, where AT LEAST 95 percent of guys absolutely appreciate a woman who can do her face up nice and sexy. Similarly, in my 41.5 years on this earth, I have NEVER met anyone who is "saving their

[redeyemindtricks]

virginity" for marriage, except for VERY religious people living among other very religious people... and, yet, out of the few hundred people on this board, there seem to be lots of them. So... again, not representative of the real world. Same thing with the poll you're talking about. Internet boards are full of guys who are very easily intimidated by anything and everything about female sexuality and women in general... so, you have lots of guys voting the way they did on that poll. In the real world? Those guys are vanishingly rare -- especially if you meet them in places where people like to socialize (those kinds of guys NEVER socialize well, or enjoy socializing... how could they, with that kind of attitude? lol) I mean, obviously I'm not throwing total hate at internet boards in general -- since I like posting here myself -- but, you gotta #keepitreal when you think about the overall population that's posting opinions here, versus, y'know... normal people on average.

[Asker]

@redeyemindtricks im not shy or introverted. i was home coming king and played division one football. im just not some loser whos going to wife a slut.

[redeyemindtricks]

Are you @dudeman, by any chance?

[Asker]

@redeyemindtricks no I dont know who that is.

[redeyemindtricks]

hm, interesting. if he posts here, then, I'm wrong... but, I don't think I'm wrong.

[redeyemindtricks]

@smmyskittles -- check yr messages mahahah

[CheerGirl38139]

@redeyemindtricks This food just came here to troll/slut shame. Nothing more. Nothing less. His views were formed long ago. All he wanted was a platform to repeatedly post about his pathetic lack of self-confidence.

[CheerGirl38139]

dood*

[JuicyBrain]

Yeah, we're not all weird like that. I personally wouldn't mind.

[redeyemindtricks]

@CheerGirl38139 @smmyskittles lol for some reason I came across this post.

This anon poster turned 30 on the same day as dudeman, so, pretty much confirmed that dudeman is a liar (as if we didn't know all along mahah)

... also interesting that his lies evolve over time. a quick search shows that, a few years ago, it was "i was nominated for homecoming king but didn't win"
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q370034-who-you-in-high-school

... but now of course he WAS homecoming king. (and he's fucked hundreds of women, and all that... ahahha... and walked to school uphill both ways! in the snow!)

why do people put so much effort into trying to impress randoms on the internet? WHY?

[CheerGirl38139]

@redeyemindtricks who knows. I think it's normally just trolling for reactions. These fucktards post ridiculously duplicitous scenarios intentionally just to trigger people. And the more ludicrous the story, the more triggers they get... up to a point where it's unbelievable that few people bite.

When this guy said "low quality" above - it reminds me of that dude that kept posting a few weeks ago that he "banged non-virgins and then dumps them, because they're low quality people". He's a ho himself, but he wants a relationship with a virgin, because he feels cheated that he's been getting "low quality used pussy".

It's just bullshit trigger bait. Sadly, this is how a lot of them really think tho.

media.giphy.com/media/BHqDQ3GlsElMI/giphy.gif

[Vesuvius87]

You're allowed to break up whenever you want to. If I found a potential boyfriend was into the porn industry, I would have reacted the same and been disgusted. It would have ended up in a break up too.

That's because I have never had random sex and only had a past relationship. I pretty much expect a guy with similar history and views towards sex. I can't date someone that's had dozens of partners either.

[Vesuvius87]

***found out Though, I must say if you're the type of guy that can get any women and has had your share in the past but only think a woman is disgusting for doing the same, then you would be a hypocrite.

[Drunk_Elephant_]

It's only dumb if you dumped while she was dating you, while she had the threesome. Otherwise you made a giant mistake.

[Asker]

how is it a giant mistake to not want to date a slut.

[Drunk_Elephant_]

Did she have the threesome while dating you?

[kittycat119]

Yeah that was a stupid and insanely immature reason to break up with her. It happened before u so its none of your business and lucky for her now she's not with someone who can't handle something she did before meeting him

[Asker]

how is it none of my business. she's was my girlfriend everything in her life is my business.

[Redshift]

Your logic isn't much better than his. What if you found out your boyfriend used to fool around with goats, sheep and other barn animals? You wouldn't care since he did it before you met him?

[kittycat119]

@Redshift animals is way different then a threesome with people. And making that comparison is completely weird that u did it's like saying if he slept with kids. I wouldn't care if b4 I met my boyfriend he had fucked dudes or had threesomes everyday with other girls. His life b4 me is none of my business because I wasn't n his life then. If he did it while we where together that'd b worth breaking up over. And no anything they did b4 meeting u is actually not your business as it does not pertain to u at all

[Asker]

it pertains to me because we are dating.

[kittycat119]

No it doesn't. Someone's sex life b4 they started dating is none of your business. If she wanted to tell u about it cool but if she didn't then she shouldn't have to. What she did b4 u has nothing to do with u even if u guys r dating because those things happened b4 u. You'd b mad if u had a threesome back n college and she broke up with u over something u dis b4 meeting her. Because again it happened b4 she knew u making it none of your business

[Asker]

its my business because i say it is. we are dating thus its my business.

[kittycat119]

And that's a delusional way of looking at it is all I'm saying. So judging from how u act she's lucky u broke up with her

[cavmanier]

I think @Redshift was pointing out "It happened before u so its none of your business" doesn't apply to every situation so it doesn't really make sense to use as the reason.

[kittycat119]

@cavmanier actually when it's there sexual past year it's not of his business as long as she's not bringing any harm to him

[Asker]

no if she's interviewing to be my wife (aka dating) then it is my business.

[kittycat119]

Dear God u need a reality check so bad

[Asker]

wrong

[kittycat119]

Fact

[Asker]

fictitious. why are you defending sluts. are you a slut.

[kittycat119]

Does having sex with my boyfriend and blowing him everyday make me a slut? Or do I have to have had sex you don't see as good? So does me being raped by my brother count as me being a slut since it's not something people see as normal or being raped by an ex who didn't understand the word no? Because I've been called a slut for all of that so

[Asker]

it depends if you stay with you're boyfriend or not.

[kittycat119]

Currently still dating but doesn't mean if we break up another guy should call me a slut because I slept with him

[Asker]

doesn't matter. you blowing a dude everyday and another guy is supposed to be ok with it. lol fuck off.

[kittycat119]

Of course he should b because b4 me he was probably having sex and getting blown by another girl lol. And who cares? I don't, if he had a sex life b4 me that's not my business. Hell b4 me my boyfriend had sex with a lot of girls but after meeting me I've been the only ine he's with. That's what's important. Why r u a virgin? Because if not then u r being a hypocrite

[Asker]

not how the world works. sorry i was the one to let you know.

[kittycat119]

Yeah it is. Omg u r insane if u don't thibk it is. Almost no one is getting married as a virgin anymore so that means almost every girl u date has had another mans penis n her mouth or another place. Sorry to break it to u. And I love how u dodge telling me if u r a virgin

[Asker]

you realize almost nobody is getting married in general right. and those that do are less slutty then those that dont.

[kittycat119]

People r getting married still... dude do u not pay attention anymore. And again u dodge the question so obviously u r a hypocrite which makes this so much funnier

[Asker]

lol you clearly dont know anything.

[kittycat119]

Omg u r so delusional it's amazing

[Asker]

yes you are. its fascinating actually.

[kittycat119]

Lol wow u r funny it's almost charming ugh. Well my boyfriend just came over so sadly I must bid you farewell for today as I wants cuddles and I don't think you'd be good for that so I'm gonna go cuddling with him

[Asker]

you mean you're going to suck the dick of a man you won't know in a year.

[kittycat119]

That might happen after awhile of cuddles yes lol 🙊. And I've known him 5 years and we're engaged so I will still know him next year sweetie

[kittycat119]

So point invalid

[Adenn]

If you're not okay with it, then I think it is a valid reason. For me personally, I wouldn't care, it was in the past. I would be curious about it and probably ask her about it but I wouldn't care.

For me it is just like a woman having different partners in the past, it just so happened that she had two partners at the same time, no big deal.

[luvstoned4him]

I agree with her. sorry. but thats in the past and most likely she didn't know you by then. I could understand if she cheated on you by having a threesome and you dumped her. You guys need to discuss it and move forward.

[Asker]

nah there will be no discussion but i am moving forward as a single man.

[luvstoned4him]

@Asker, really? you aren't even gonna try?

[Asker]

no of course not. she can't undo what she already did.

[luvstoned4him]

sad sad sad

[Rebecca9090]

Yeah it's a dumb reason to dump somebody. Why would you do that?

[Asker]

i dont date sluts. she's not good enough to be the mother of my children.

[Rebecca9090]

I think your morals are a bit messed up. What does a sexual act determine the quality of a mother? If that's how you think, somebody's going to be single for a long time...

[Asker]

yeah that somebody is not me. im a hot commodity sluts are not.

[Rebecca9090]

you sound like a weirdo frankly...

[Asker]

weird in the sense that I am not the norm sure.

[Soteris]

I would not have done so but you reserve the right to dump someone for whatever reason you feel justifies it. It does not need to make sense or avoid hurting the feelings of others.

[SarahsSummer]

You dumped her for something she did before even meeting you? What the hell is wrong with you? What she did prior to being your girlfriend us none of your business. Smh.

[Asker]

she can't change the past. also yes it is my business. wtf is wrong with women these days, you have zero respect for men.

[SarahsSummer]

Dude, What are you talking about? How on earth is it your business? If you think every woman you meets prior activities are in any way your business you are destined to be a very lonely and bitter single man. And how does "respect for men" even become part of this conversation? ?

[Asker]

not every women i meet, just the ones that require me to raise children with them and marry them and not sleep with other women. respect for men is part of this because you dont see mens requirements for a relationship as important.

[Asker]

you do not see men as people.

[SarahsSummer]

Oh, I get it. You're one of those psychos that believe the woman they marry needs to have been a virgin up until her wedding night. And anything less is disrespectful to all the men of the world. Good luck with that, wacko. Smh.

[Asker]

no. you are completely off.

[SarahsSummer]

How so? How is what any woman did in her own personal and private life prior to knowing you in any way 1) your business? and 2) disrespectful to men?

[Asker]

i didn't say that what she did is disrespectful to men. thats your limited understanding of English that got you to think thats what i said. its my business because she is auditioning for a job. aka dating me. the job being wife.

[SarahsSummer]

Auditioning? Lol. But ok how does her prior sex life affect the audition and again, where does your comment of women having no respect for men come from? Are you actually saying its disrespectful to men to live our lives how we see fit? Or that the only way we could possibly show respect for a man we may or may not ever meet is to think about what that fictional man finds acceptable in our prior activities and behavior?

[Asker]

my comment on respect comes from you're words. clearly you are unaware of your hatred towards men.

[SarahsSummer]

So I've painted you into a corner with common sense and the only thing you can come up with is MY oblivious hatred of men? WRONG. I'm happily committed to a man I love for over 2 years now and couldn't care less what he did prior to meeting me. I love him for the man he is today.

[kittycat119]

He's just an idiot who as you said only wants a virgin as a wife. And as I told him in my comment what she did before uim has nothing to do with him and is by far none of his business. I'm guessing she probably broke up with him or something and he's just bitter and making an excuse or he wishes she'd involve him in one, probably with another man since he doesn't like girls who are into threesomes

[Asker]

@kittycat119 wrong.

[kittycat119]

No asker I'm right. You are insane and you're going to die alone if you continue to act like this

[Asker]

@kittycat119 you mean ill be happy. sounds great to me.

[kittycat119]

Yeah because u will b alone something u probably want with how u act

[SarahsSummer]

@kittycat119 yup. He actually hates women and will be happy to die alone. and all woman kind will be happy none of us are with him

[Asker]

completely wrong.

[kittycat119]

I can't believe he honestly thinks most chicks he date didn't have a sex life b4 him. How delusional do u have to b to thibk that? And what's funny is I don't thibk he's a virgin since he wouldn't answer because he knows if he did he'd provided he's a hypocrite lol

[kittycat119]

Lol no asker she's 100% right that that's your future

[Asker]

@kittycat119 i dont think that at all. how did you get that?

[kittycat119]

Asker look at what you've said to everyone. It's so obvious you hate women or have a horrible hatred of sex. Or as I think u r trying to b too manly to admit u r a hypocrite for breaking uo with her I've something that's none of your business because you'd b mad if it was u she did this to

[Asker]

@kittycat119 nope none of what i said means i hate women or have a disdain for sex.

[kittycat119]

Yeah my little delusional friend yes yes it does

[EllieLexis513]

I'm not understanding how that's a good reason. I wouldn't like it if someone I dated had a threesome but if they did it years ago with two consenting people and the person they were dating was okay with it then who the hell cares? It doesn't make them a slut or anything, it's a fetish a lot of people have. Doesn't mean they're a cheater, doesn't mean they have an STD, doesn't mean they won't treat me right...

You sound judgmental. There are a lot worse things that she could have done. I personally don't think it was really any of your business that she did that anyway. Has nothing to do with you and her.

[Asker]

it does make them a slut.

[EllieLexis513]

How? How is it different to sleep with two different guys in one night versus 1 guy in 2010 and 1 guy in 2011? What's the difference?

[Asker]

the differences is slut.

[EllieLexis513]

With your reasoning, it sounds like she got off easy. She'll find better than you anyway.

[Asker]

no she won't. I will find better.

[EllieLexis513]

You won't lol, not if you continue being a judgmental. Women get turned off from men like you.

[Asker]

no trust me, they get turned on by men like me.

[EllieLexis513]

We don't haha, get off your high horse.

[Asker]

you dont know me. I can just go by my life experience. women love me.

[EllieLexis513]

They don't, if they did, you'd be in a happy relationship by now and you're not.

[Asker]

yeah that was my fault for being with too many women. didn't really care to settle down till about right now.

[EllieLexis513]

Whatever floats your boat.

[DarkHumorRUs]

wow, so she double cheated on you.

[Asker]

she didn't cheat on me.

[DarkHumorRUs]

Oooh I assumed she was in college right now and had a threesome there while dating you.

[NJ_Casanova]

If she didn't do it behind your back/while you were together than it's not a big deal.

[Asker]

it wasn't behind my back it was before we met.

[NJ_Casanova]

It wouldn't bother me. I prefer not knowing about past relationships... I only care that she's health and what she enjoys doing with me.

[Asker]

yeah but i can get any women. no need to have a ho.

[Redshift]

Everyone has the right to choose what they can tolerate and what they can't when looking for a partner. I'd never date a smoker. You dumped her for sleeping around. We make choices and live with them. I don't think you need our approval or judgement. It's your life after all.

[Barrabus_the_Free]

Everyone has standards. If something she's done violates yours, you have every right to break up with her. Based on some of the female responses to this, I'm hoping you gave her a different reason so that she won't lie about her history to the next guy that gets involved with her.

[Gabriella171]

Yeah that was kinda a dumb reason to break up with someone. That's her past not her future. It was college everyone has done something their not proud off. You live and you learn.

I personally could never date a guy who would bash his ex girlfriend or talk down on her because it shows what kind of person you are and if you would do it to her you dam sure would do it to me

[Asker]

the past is the only thing that matters. the future didn't happen yet.

[Gabriella171]

But the future will happen with or without you. If you couldn't accept her past you don't deserve to be in her future. I honestly think she dodged a bullet, you are not worth her time.

[SovereignessofVamps]

I'd think you were jelly and laugh.

[AleDeEurope]

Well, not everyone is gonna accept everything that others do, people need to realize that. So if you're not ok with what she did, then I don't see anything wrong in breaking up.
The past is the past excuse is bullshit.

[Barrabus_the_Free]

This.

[RexCatholicissimus]

She was just finding herself bro how dare you stomp on this strong, independent woman's free expression of her sexuality.

[Asker]

you're funny man.

[RexCatholicissimus]

Can I just say, I like how checking back 13 days later, the absolutely massive negative response you had for not being particularly interested in a girl who had a threesome. Would it be okay to dump her if she had gotten herpes from her sexual experiences? Or should a man love a woman's herpes, as they're a part of her, just like her curves.

[Asker]

its nuts. what is the world coming to.

[Rissyanne]

Are you looking for a virgin?

[Asker]

no im looking for an honorable women to be the mother of my children.

[Rissyanne]

What is your definition of an honorable woman?

[Asker]

its a working definition but it definitely doesn't include group sex.

[Rissyanne]

Come on now... be more specific. A woman that has slept with one guy? Or less than 3? Or any woman who hasn't had a threesome?

[Asker]

less then 5 would be great. especially at marrying age. actually 1-2 is about the limit.

[Rissyanne]

Ok... say you meet a nice girl. And you fall in love with her and marry her. And you and her start a family. Then you found out she has been with 7 guys. What then?

[Asker]

7 guys. well that sucks. i guess we dont marry right away. id have to tack on 4-5 years of dating before id marry her. so we would need to date a decade before kids and marriage.

[Angie221]

If it was before you met her... then you shouldn't get upset

[Asker]

im only upset that she wasted my time.

[MrAtticusLebowski]

It doesn't matter if we think it's dumb or not. You two would have broken up in the end. One of you is less of a prude than the other.

[Anongirl6]

She can't change the past and it certainly doesn't affect your relationship in the here and now. Unless she wants more threesomes. She was in college and was young and stupid. She could've just been naive and wanted to try something different that she may not have been comfortable with. But if it's a deal breaker for you, it's a deal breaker.

[Asker]

it does effect our relationship because she can't change the past.

[Anongirl6]

That makes no sense whatsoever.

[Cosytoasty]

How we feel doesn't really matter. The question is, how do YOU feel?

Personally i wouldn't have dumped her over that if everything else in the relationship was going along swimmingly, but it's your call.

If you feel liberated, then you did the right thing.

[Asker]

i do feel liberated. i could never commit to her.

[Prof_Don]

Not everyone's sexuality is the same, you're just not at a level of kink that she is at.

Keep this in mind; most girls will NEVER tell you EVERYTHING about their sexual history, unless you have displayed yourself to her as either really sexually open, or very non-judgmental.

So almost every girl you will date in the future may have had a one night stand, or experimented with women, or had groupsex, or has done anal. You just won't ever 100% know.

[VirginiaBeachBum]

I agree with her.

[This_is_my_username]

It's a dumb reason dude. That happened in the past. You were her present. That's like crying over spilt milk..

[Asker]

silt mild didn't fuck your girlfriend though. completely different.

[Red_Arrow]

"silt mild" didn't fuck my girlfriend either. :-)

[This_is_my_username]

lol i don't have a girlfriend and what is slit mild? bahhahahah we're talking about you not about slits. LOL. You know what you did her a favor. She can go find a nice man now :P

[This_is_my_username]

@Red_Arrow BHAHAHAHA!!

[meatballs21]

Her past hurts your present how, exactly?

[JustinTheGreat]

It's a dumb reason to dump her. I mean I would understand if she still waned to have threesomes and you didn't like her wanting that. But that was the past. If she's a changed person then I don't see the problem

[wolfe88061]

It is a very dumb reason to leave someone but it's all good because she dose not need to date a dumbass that is so self centered anyways hopfaly she has some one to tell her that

[ConsultantIsBack]

That's really crazy but who cares what I think about you life mate

[theCatcherintheRye]

It's her past, dude. Chill.

[Asker]

her past but not going to be my wife.

[JSmuve]

I feel fine with you dumping your girlfriend for this specific reason.

[Nuala]

That's totally okay, if you don't want to date a girl who's had a threesome that's your right.
But I (and most girls) don't date guys who dump girls for stupid reasons.

[Asker]

this isn't a stupid reason.

[Nuala]

I didn't say it was.

[Jayded1]

You are a troll or an idiot.

[Byakuyarko]

You and her weren't in the relationship with same goals in mind... Reason enough to dump her if you ask me

[Sasha07]

x3.cdn03.imgwykop.pl/.../...ZDQi0tiRC6w2RuFrp6.jpg

[DaddyRollingStone]

Lol, good call OP. Never trust a hoe.

#NoHymenNoDiamond

[DearLife]

You sound insecure.

[Asker]

no i sound confident. i can get another women. i dont need a slut.

[Tomsta]

That is a stupid reason to dump someone unless she was cheating on you...

[xKuroyamix]

I would have dumped her too.

[Words_and_Wisdom]

It is a dumb reason to dump someone.

[joe138]

Dude that is a dumb reason, it happened in the past. If you love her ask her back out and apologize. You messed up. Not trying to be mean but it's true.

[Polocrew]

Lmfao you triggered em OP

[Shigeno]

A man having 1 time threesome is a slut too, then?
Lame provo, dood.

[Skinnyjason]

Your pathetic! That's a lousy piss poor reason to dump a girl! Maybe she didn't like that you tried sticking your finger up your ass? Your so insecure with yourself that someone's past intimidates you so much you can't be with them. Good for her! You'd probably bore her anyway!

[Asker]

everything you said is false.

[Skinnyjason]

That's the fucking point!

[Asker]

so you agree with me?

[abc--123]

I'm happy for her.

[xXHelenaoftroyXx]

You did well. Well done :)

[Anonymous]

It would bother me too, I would never date someone who had casual sex or slept around. It says a lot about their personality to me and that we're most likely not going to be very compatible.

[Anonymous]

It's a dumb reason to dump somebody.
If she had a threesome while IN the relationship without your consent , then that's cheating and you should dump her.
If she had it PRIOR , then it's water under the bridge.

[Anonymous]

Did she cheat on you? Or was this before?

[Anonymous]

She's a slut. I would have done the same thing, bro.

[Anonymous]

What my boyfriend did before he was with me doesn't bother me, so long as he is STD free. It's not like he's having sex with others while together. If he is, then I'd break up with him. Why does it bother you what she did before she met you?

[Asker]

because i date to find a wife. she's not good enough.

[Opinion Owner]

Ok, then that is how you feel. The resentment would leave the relationship sour, and would end anyways. So you did the right thing in moving on.

[Anonymous]

How cam you date a slut? Don't waste your time on a slutty worth living female.

[Anonymous]

My wife has had three some an was a complet slut in college I don't care

[Opinion Owner]

You should do it with another guy and girl or guys

[Opinion Owner]

I ment who did she do it with

[Asker]

i dont know. i dont really care. how dont you care that your girlfriend was a ho?

[Opinion Owner]

At first I was upset and in shock more then anything thing. But then I got over it and figured the past is the past

[Asker]

it doesn't bother you knowing that you are less of a man for accepting such a women? it doesn't bother you that your wife who you commited yourself to gave her best years to other men who saw her as a cock sheath? you dont feel that you as a good and decent man deserve better for the mother of your children?