Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health My boyfriend asked me if his friend can join with sex?
Anonymous
My boyfriend asked me if his friend can join us with sex yesterday. I was shocked because he never asked me this before and we have been together for a half year.. He was even begging for it. I told him no but he says it’s one of his sexual fantasies. Does he take me seriously? And should I do it because he wants it? I would only consider doing it if he won’t judge me afterwards.
Updates:
+1 y
Thanks for the honest opinions and looking out for me. I don’t really feel that comfortable doing it.. I never wanted to be in a threesome and it I would feel really low about myself afterwards. But he keeps like not pressuring me but asking for it.
0 1
What Girls & Guys Said
11 34Obviously you shouldn't do it if you don't want to. But if you're worried he will resent you, and there's a good chance he might, then take baby steps. Have his friend come over, give you a nude massage, and then leave. Then talk about it for a month, and see how things go. If you both want to take another step, then maybe have his friend come over and finger you. And maybe you can jack him off. Then step back for a month and decide if you want to move forward.
Great idea
@pokenstroke People seem to always think it's all or nothing. Even some swingers prefer a soft swap, because that's as far as they want to go.
Test the water,
That’s a great idea actually. Thankyou I will consider this one for sure
That is a nice suggestion hook up culture. Very uncomfortable... yes i downvoted.
@midnightmoon05 The asker liked my idea, and that's good enough for me. I could really give two shits what your opinion is. What two consenting adults do, is none of your business. Mind your own business, and let other people live their lives. Yes, I downvoted you.
The asker like your idea? You can do what you wish my dear. This society has corrupted young minds. As long as you are not my child or my student, you can do whatever you wish... All actions have its consequences... as long as you are ready to take on the responsibilities, more power to you.
@midnightmoon05 I love it when people give you their permission to do something when they have absolutely no control over you or the situation. And you're crazy if you think that only young people have threesomes.
I'm not that naive... people have been doing these sexual acts or doing animals for thousands of years. Not new and not only young people get into different sexual fetishes. Nor do I have control what others do. I am not trying to influence the asker to go do something she is clearly not comfortable with. Sometimes when (she in this case) thinks her boyfriend loves her and wants a one on one relationship, finds out the guy has a different agenda, it is a red flag. So I support her view and wanted to let her know, to not do things that qualifies hook up cultures when she wants a serious future with this guy. He may not be the one. I hope he will respect her and make a great future with her and not bring her to other men to share her. I know she is smart enough to use her head. :)
@midnightmoon05 That's great, but why are you telling me this. Just write your own reply and let me have mine.
Just chit chatting :) ... Was taking a break from work. Have fun hooking up if that's what you are into.
@midnightmoon05 No, that wasn't chit chat, you were criticizing my opinion. And I don't do hookups, but thanks for assuming. This question was about her boyfriend wanting a threesome, but she wasn't sure if he would judge her. I just offered a solution, and she said she liked it.
I didn't read where she said she likes it? Am I missing something? I am even more curious now... your solution is good for those who want hook ups. I am sooooo glad you are not into that. But why would you suggest something you are not into and she seems to feel very uncomfortable with what her boyfriend is asking her to do.
@midnightmoon05 Are you missing something? Yes. I have no idea why you can't find what she said. "That’s a great idea actually. Thank you I will consider this one for sure" She also said in her question that she would do it if he wouldn't judge her. So it's not the threesome she's worried about, it's being judged, like you're doing right now. "
She DID agree with you... thats terrible!!! .. wow.. I feel so sad... yes, people can easily be influenced by negativity. I know exactly where she's coming from. I am helping my daughter deal with something similiar. But if you look at her update... she clearly stated that she is grateful that Gaggers are looking out for her "Thanks for the honest opinions and looking out for me. I don’t really feel that comfortable doing it.. I never wanted to be in a threesome and it I would feel really low about myself afterwards." And other responses that supports her, glad she will not go for it. I am really proud of her for standing up for herself and not being talked into by her boyfriend to do something can have a long negative emotional effect. We really have to be really careful with our adivce here... because if she truly got into it she will have a lot of guilt in her and may even need thearpies to help her feel better again... for being used by her "boyfriend".
I agree with both of you girls. I have the same opinion as midnightmoon but I guess I thought I have to be a certain way to like maybe please him? Never thought of bringing someone into our relationship. But if we ever do consider it (which i probably won’t) I would do it in the way ‘anonymous’ suggested! But thanks to both of you for your opinions.
@asker, You're welcome. I wish this site would only allow us to interact with the person asking the question.
@midnightmoon05 The horse is dead now, so you can just go away.