Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health My boyfriend goes behind my back and watches twerking videos or porn. I've asked him to stop more than 3 times and he always goes back to it? Help?
Anonymous
This has been a problem for over 2 years, or at least that is when I found out he had been watching porn and twerking videos. I cried my eyes out the first time (only 18) and he genuinely seemed like he was upset at himself the first time I confronted him. I told him I felt like I wasn't good enough and that I didn't like that he watched that stuff, especially behind my back. We were having sex frequently so I didn't know what the problem was. Flash forward a year and I found out from his phone that he was googling specific porn stars and twerking again. I confronted him again and he called me psycho for looking through his phone. I asked him how he would like it if I was watching other guys on my phone behind his back and getting off to it. He seemed less apologetic that time and more annoyed at me for confronting him. Now about a year later I am in this situation again. I have yet to confront him about it but I know he will be mad again that I found out. I logged on to YouTube, with the sole intention of watching a podcast on there, saw the recent search was a woman who only posts twerking videos. This is on our shared device so he can't accuse me of intentionally "digging". I have been scared of this happening recently because we haven't had sex in a couple weeks. Due to my period being really bad and overall loss of interest at this time. I have told him before that I prefer him saying something instead of going behind my back and watching that stuff because I feel like it replaces me but it seems my instincts were correct. How should I approach this? I'm very upset and naturally cried over it again. He is at work right now and I feel like if I text him about it, he will pass it off like it was nothing.
1 2
What Girls & Guys Said
16 42You and my ex are fucking psycho, now you want him to stop watching porn, then you'll tell him he can't watch anime, or watch wrestling or watch YouTube video that have girls in them. You're going to make him give everything up and still make him feel like a piece of shit after.
If you ask me it's all a waste of time. Just let him watch his porn, you probably watch it yourself
Girl, chill out. Basically thus boils down to 2 options, 1. he either goes out and cheats. 2. He watches videos but doesn't fuck other women, just you. Cause if you take the videos from him, he's gonna not get that satisfaction from the videos, and he's gonna end up going out to get it. So the videos shouldn't worry you, they should be a relief
It's porn, not heroin why does it bother you, not like he will ever leave you and go date the porn star the more you force him the worst it gets.
why do you need help with it? why must he stop this? does it inhibit your sex life?
Watching porn isn't a big deal at all, almost everyone does it. It has nothing to do with you personally.
And the twerking things. It seems like he has a fetish for it. instead of confronting him about it, you get also help each other explore your sexual preferences together.
What's the big deal? I've watch porn with my wonderful girlfriend. Thankfully she's not a crazy person like you
Stop asking him, since it's not up to you what he watches. Get over it.
Wow, that was easy.
Dump him. Because if his nterest in porn and twerk affects your relationship even if you teo have sex he is not a keeper. This kind of gy would dump your ass if he finds another girl.
Why so insecure girl? Porn won't steal your boyfriend away. Being controlling and annoying does!
What's wrong with watching porn? May be you can join him while watching and share the moments..
Learn to twerk stop being hostile
To me the problem would be in the sneaking and disrespect of your feelings.
I do not think him watching twerking girls or porn as a replacement at all. However, this is how you feel about it and no matter how much others are saying it most likely is not like thst and nonmatter if it really is not like that - it is dtill how you feel.
The way you have described it makes me think that you can confront him as many times as you want to, but it will not in the end make a fifference. He will not stop watching these things (for whatever his reason is). So I do believe you need to figure out with yourself if you can accept that - you can still try to change him having accepted it, but I think it is futile - or if it really means so much yo you thst you cannot be with it.
I am sure there will be a guy that you can find who will respect yout wishes, but I also believe that the chances of you being "decieved" again by another boyfriend will be fairly higher than not. Deceived reffering to your experience finiding out thst the given boyfriend will be finding an interest in watching other girls twerking, watching porn or similar, perhaps even after having told you that he won't.
Personally for me the deal breaker here is nit being able to stay honest and listen to each others needs, talking it out, reflecting the situstion from both perspectives, reaching a common understanding.
Ditch him. He will never change.
Leave him to watch his porn or split up. You can't be so controlling
he's watching girls bounce their ass, not banging your friends. he's not apologetic about it because the shit is litteraly every where. he's not ashamed he's just annoyed he's gotta deal with you catching him.
The problem with watching porn nowadays is there's to many ads, everytime I try to enjoy a video you got ads saying local moms want sex, and I know its not true.
Way to much to read... read the head line... just watch porn yourself make him jealous...
How often do you turn him down for sex is my first question
I think you are right
Men are going to want to look at porn and Jack off. As long as he isn't seeking other girls out to have sex with, a little porn will keep him happy, healthy, and with you. Getting on him for looking at porn is going to push him away. You've got your boundaries yes, and he needs to respect that, but he also has needs that need to be respected as well. Talk with him and come to a compromise that allows you to feel confident in your relationship and allows him to look at pornography.