Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
My boyfriend is addicted to porn, what should I do?
Anonymous
My boyfriend and I are about to move in together, we got in a discussion last night because every time we try to have sex he can't get off to me because he already masturbated to porn of course. I confronted him and he admitted it was a problem and he would do anything to stop and make things better with me. What do you guys think? Is it easy just to stop watching porn and masturbating so you can enjoy havin sex with your girl?
1 2
What Girls & Guys Said
23 59maybe its not a big "addiction" or "conspiracy" and he just likes to watch porn sometimes. reach some kind of reasonable compromise hopefully
He can't get it up dude. read the details.
I don't know I face the problem of being addict myself
Maybe cut the internet or use block programs
It's absolutely not easy. There's no known cure and porn is very available. It's not like booze where you can just stop keeping it in the house. You sure you want to move in with a porn junkie who can't get it up? Think about this carefully.
very detailed explanation.
just like there is the group Alcoholics Anonymous there is also something for porn addicts maybe he can find there help
Make a porno with him
almost every guy does it even the ones who are sexually active.
Porn is very hard to quit. It's like a drug addiction.
If you cannot have sex with him because he is dumping all of his sexual energy into porn, it will be an unhealthy relationship. Move on.
morning sex
I try to have sex with me all the time morning afternoon you name it haha but I'm always the one chasing it not him
have you tried given him Viagra so that he wants it and if you keep doing that he will probably come to you more than the internet
No never thought of that
You have to chase him?
Looks to me, it's because you don't really satisfy his need so he has to rely on porn to release himself. Instead of just telling him stopwatching porn ask him what he prefer in sex to spice things up. Wear lingerie, make the scene more romantic, try different sex position, whatever it is.
Nope. Porn is a true addictive material. This is not her fault.
@samhradh_leannan Nope. The reason why that guy would even go to porn to begin with is because he does not get satisfaction so he needs something else to fulfill that desire.
Porn addictions are real. No matter what drove him to porn in the first place, if he's really addicted, that is not his girlfriend's fault and she is not the one who can fix it. This problem may have started before they even started dating. Even if he did turn to porn out of dissatisfaction with their sex life, if he is really addicted, he is the only one who can address that.
@samhradh_leannan You still don't get it. If the real thing is satisfying enough, then the guy wouldn't need porn in the first place. Think...
I think you're not getting that porn is a true addictive material, like a drug. Porn addictions are as serious as a drug or alcohol addiction. If he really is addicted- and it does happen- then she can't fix it for him with a few extra blowjobs. He's the only one who can address his addiction.
@samhradh_leannan and I think you are just not getting why a man would still watch porn the begin with when he has a woman to fuck with.
That's like asking why people become alcoholics when they have access to juice. There are countless reasons why a person in a relationship may still watch porn. Maybe they don't get to see each other that often. Maybe they're long distance. Maybe this problem started before they even began dating, or before they began having sex. Maybe, like many perfectly normal people, he still wants to masturbate once in a while despite being in a relationship. If he has an addictive personality, watching porn even a few times may have led to an addiction.
@samhradh_leannan That is not a very wise comparison since I dont see any connection... by the way, you can make up all the reasons you want but in OP's case, it is obvious that her man is losing interest because she can't satisfy him so he needs to turn to porn to maximize his satisfaction. If it is addiction, then it is initiated by his lack of attraction sexual wise, then it leads to addiction.
What exactly did she say that made that "obvious"?
@samhradh_leannan Clearly you didn't even read her post and you are listing so many hypothetical scenarios which none applies to her situation but just for the sake of argument... wow, just wow.
Which post? The post where she stated, oh so descriptively, that her boyfriend "is addicted to porn"? Or are you referring to the part where her boyfriend admitted that it's a problem that he would do anything to fix? I don't think I'm the one who didn't read the post.
She never said why he watches porn or how his addiction developed. So neither of us know. I'm listing hypothetical possibilities because it's all we can do at this point. You're ASSUMING that he chose porn specifically because he wasn't satisfied with their sex life, and that he continues to watch it purely because he's not satisfied. But the asker said nothing to support that assumption.
@samhradh_leannan The very first post, where it began with "My boyfriend and I are about to move in together" ?
I have no idea how you're getting anything about their sex life from that statement. She did not say that he said he wasn't satisfied by their sex life, or that he gave any indication that he wasn't satisfied by their sex life, aside from his interest in porn which could be caused by a variety of factors. You are making some vastly unfounded assumptions here.
@samhradh_leannan it is not one statement, it is a paragraph.
Yes. It's a paragraph. Good job. It's a paragraph that contains absolutely zero information about why her boyfriend chooses to watch porn or how he became addicted.
@samhradh_leannan And it is just a paragraph and you still didn't see it... nope, good job for you.
Didn't see WHAT? The part where she said "he watches porn because he's not satisfied with our sex life"? You're right, I didn't see that part. Because it's not there.
@samhradh_leannan My god, the fact that be already masturbate because they even have sex means he doesn't need her to satisfy himself. you really need everything spelled out for you, do you? i can forgive you for not having a dick since you won't understand how it feel, but dont tell me you dont have an eye to read
You're clearly still not grasping the concept of what a porn addiction means. The fact that he already masturbated prior to seeing his girlfriend is not an indication that he turned to porn as a direct response to being unsatisfied by their sex life.
@samhradh_leannan And you clearly don't understand men's mentality and needs and pretend you know everything. People like you are the reason why stuff like this happens.
Are you denying that porn addictions are real addictions? Do you not understand that he could have been addicted even before they began dating? There is not nearly enough information for you to reasonably draw the conclusion that their sex life is the cause of his in any way. You are making SO many assumptions here. And yet somehow, you're accusing me of being the one to pretend to know everything.
his addiction in any way*
@samhradh_leannan addiction is possible but in OPs case, it is not initiated by addiction, but lack of attraction to his girlfriend.
WHAT are you basing that assumption on? You're the one who keeps telling me to "read her post", so come on then. What exactly did she say that backs up your assumption that his addiction is her fault? The asker has not given us a whole lot of information. But what she HAS said is that her boyfriend is addicted, that they are about to move in together, and that every time they try to have sex, he can't get off because he has already masturbated to porn. NONE of that contradicts the possibility that he was addicted before they started dating, or before they started having sex. There is also NOTHING that implies any specific cause or motivation for his original porn habit OR his resulting addiction. I don't know the full story any better than you do, but accusing this poor girl of being unattractive and not satisfying her boyfriend sexually without ANY reason or proof whatsoever is not only ignorant, it's also cruel.
@samhradh_leannan again, it's not an assumption, it's very obvious when she describe the situation. She said every time, which means it is been a while, but not as an addiction, but the lack of interest with his girlfriend for some time so he has to rely on porn the satisfy himself. On top of that, after a healthy male ejaculated, he should be able to "go again" but once his girlfriend ask for sex, he can't get off to her, which is an excuse because if he is interested, he defiant can. This is what I meant that if you go no dick, you won't understand
She described the situation as an addiction, and considering that she knows more about the situation than we do, all we can really do is trust that she knows what she's talking about. For all we know, her boyfriend TOLD her that he is addicted. And if he says he is addicted, we have no reason to assume that it's not true. An addiction to porn is a very powerful draw, as are addictions to other substances. If he really is addicted, then his choice to masturbate to porn- potentially enough times to be uninterested in sex or be unable to ejaculate later during sex- likely has more to do with the draw of porn than a lack of interest in having sex with her. I may not have a penis, but I do know that a guy who spends an entire day jacking off to porn may not want sex later even if he's attracted to the girl. I also don't need a penis to understand how addictions work. Obviously YOUR penis has not clued YOU in about the power of addiction.
@samhradh_leannan but the problem is it's not addiction though. If his girlfriend is attractive enough, no men would want to use hand instead of the real thing. So he choose the use masturbation every time then that means the fantasy in porn is what satisfy him because his girlfriend couldn't deliver it. What she need to do is be open and see what her boyfriend is into in order to spice things up. She described it as addiction but it doesn't mean that is the case because she isn't him, even she can't 100% gaurantee what turns his guy on.
HOW DO YOU KNOW that it's not an addiction? For all we know, he TOLD her that it's an addiction. And like I said, we don't know that he wasn't addicted before they started having sex or even before they started dating.
@samhradh_leannan how do you know it is an addiction? what he said could be an excuse, but his actions and the timing betrayed him. i guess you haven't seen enough men to know what is going on.
I don't need to have a penis to understand the impact that a porn addiction can have on a relationship. If he's addicted to porn, he's going to watch it frequently, even if he knows real sex may be an option later in the day. Even if he would PREFER to have sex later in the day. It's compulsive. That's what makes it an addiction. Addictions don't involve logical choices. The fact that he doesn't choose not to watch porn because he knows he can have sex later does not mean this isn't a real addiction. In fact, it supports the idea that it's an addiction. And relying heavily on porn for arousal (either due to a legitimate addiction or just a serious habit) can desensitize you to real sex, even if you are attracted to your partner. So the impacts are twofold.
its tough he would do good.
Get him help or leave him
sounds like he has it bad wonder how long he's been doing this
If he is blind blue, I would say ok, but if he looks like the guy in the photo I will yell at him
Blonde
Have him try NoFap.
Porn is nothing good just ruin peoples lives with fake shit. It should be banned. But since dumb people stand beside it its disgusting. Dont worry id dump his ass if he just wants to look at rotten whores.
make a game out of it tell him to wait until you both move in mess with his mind ex: find out what his fantasy is or what type of porn he watch's be the fantasy be the porn actress that when he says your name or thinks of you poof end game. there has to be reward and penalties tho good luck
i would tell him to stop watching porn because its a problem because he's addicted to porn and dont want it to get worse
it all comes down to self control. he wouldn't be able to give it up completely, instantly. but a little. by little. can act as rehab.
Dump him
So if it was the other way around than he should dump her. What to be sure there no double standard here.
@Robin48 it wouldn't be other way round I hate porn so I would dump him when have u ever heard of a woman addicted to porn lol its men who like it more and it's disgusting
AlAlot of men disgust me
She need to dump him.