Should he or she orgasm first?

[sweettasteofhot]

I myself prefer I orgasm several times before he does because once he does, it's over.

[Paul_in_Indy]

First and foremost: the most important thing is that she orgasms. Preferably more than once. I want her to be comfortable, I want her to enjoy herself, I want her to have as much pleasure as possible. Sure, I’m a nice guy and everything. But regardless of any selfless motive, I am always interviewing for my next job, so to speak. I definitely want her to do this with me again in the future. And I definitely want her to reciprocate. My philosophy is that she deserves the best sex of her life because I deserve to get great sex in return.

That said, I think it is often best for me to finish first. If I am crazy horny, then receiving oral sex to completion right at the beginning lets me calm down and focus on what I need to do for her. Ideally, when we’re having intercourse, I work really hard at achieving a simultaneous orgasm. For me, that is always the best.

[kellytheman]

Yeah the girls needs to orgasm first maybe several times to be fully sastified then when the guy cum it's over. My friends with benefits sometimes gives me a BJ to cum in her mouth then I go down on her for while to make her orgasm and if my penis gets hard again then we have sex to each cum and orgasm together. Also less messy if I don't cum much.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't really matter to me. I don't always feel the need to orgasm during sex with my husband. Sometimes if he lasts just 30 seconds that's OK. My favourite way to cum is that after we've had intercourse and he's cum inside me I like to masturbate myself rubbing his cum around my clit while he holds me, kisses me, plays with my boobs and tells me I'm beautiful and that he loves me. I cum the hardest that way and cry as I'm cumming as its so emotional, often I squirt everywhere as I'm cumming and sometimes he gets hard again after I do this.

[Faith18letsgo]

She should orgasm first because of the orgasm gap (men orgasm more then women during heterosexual sex). The guy should make sure she’s taken care of first. I’m gay and I always try to be the second to orgasm because I want her to know that making her feel good is my first priority.

[MrOracle]

The girl, in nearly all cases. Usually several times before real penetration even begins.

[msmissydc]

When he doesn't continue when he finishes allways her first. If he brings you to orgasm even when he is finished than I dont mind if he gets it first. Maybe at the time I had mine he is ready for round two.

[MasterKS]

@msmissydc performing men!

[LisaLisa89]

Personally I don't mind. I'm very used to orgasming second because in the early part of our relationship my husband was always very quick.

But the important thing is that we carried on after he'd had an orgasm and he always made sure that I also reached one. And by that stage he was often ready to start again.

If both partners want to have an orgasm and they both have one, or more, then I don't think it matters who gets there first.

[katiesmuff]

I'm with you on that as you are right on for most guys.

[sarahsmile8839]

It the guy makes me cum after him, it doesn't matter. if not, I should come first. At least once.

[sweettasteofhot]

I can see that. As long as the woman cums too!

[sarahsmile8839]

Exactly. It's amazing when we both cum at the same time.

[sweettasteofhot]

That I enjoy feeling him throb in me as I contract and grip him hard as I cum too.

[helva]

Cumming together is heavenly great. Does not happen enough for me.

[sarahsmile8839]

@helva I know what you mean

[weysally]

yes a lot of men lose interest just after they have cum, that is why I like MFM's,

[sweettasteofhot]

I had one guy cum in me first than he went to leave. I asked him what about me. He was like finger yourself if you want. I was like you jerk! I totally left him.

[CubaPirate]

Quite right too

[MasterKS]

@sweettasteofhot did you kicked him before he went out?

[weysally]

@MasterKS what

[MasterKS]

@weysally My reply is for Sweet taste of hot.

[weysally]

@MasterKS oh sorry,

[kingBroffe27]

not all men lol I'm not

[TheorionMage]

Pragmatically, EACH should be responsible for their own but...
think of such encounters as life's ultimate auditions. The object is to be called back for a second interview~

[electromagnetic]

Exactly this.

[Gummy_Cluster]

Only a smart guy would allow that to happen. If only there were more smart guys.

[summiter]

I agree with you. It is always best for a girl to orgasm first. Once a guy shoots off he can become useless until he recharges.

[SnowedIn]

I prefer that she has several orgasms before I do. But, if I do finish first, I'll make sure she has those orgasms either by finger or oral.

[sweettasteofhot]

That's fair!

[SnowedIn]

:) :)

[Gummy_Cluster]

I've tried to explain that to guys on sites like this, but they usually don't listen. It's not a good or bad thing, it's just how our creator wired us. (graphic warning, don't read any further) I talked to a guy, and he said his wife was OK if he finished first, just as long as he went down South and finished the job. He said he would, pinky swore he would, Scouts honor he would, but when a guy explodes, his mojo flies off to a distant galaxy, and he just wants a ham sandwich and a nap. lol This isn't good or bad, it's just how things work. So a smart guy will always go last. This has nothing to do with chivalry, it's just about being smart and accepting mother nature's rules. I met a lady online, and she was dumb enough to wait until marriage to have sex. (like all the idealists on this site) So she got married and could hardly wait to get "busy." Hubby climbed onboard, and got his, and then went to sleep. She later asked him about her needs, and he said that only whores need an orgasm. Waiting until marriage is such a brilliant idea.

[SnowedIn]

@Gummy_Cluster ... what you say makes absolute sense. And you're right for many men. It takes effort to get past the switch turning off but we've found that if we can do that we usually end up with round two. By the way, it's a salami sandwich, not ham. ;)

[Gummy_Cluster]

The reason I said graphic warning, is because he said he could go through the motions of going down South, but not with that toxic waste down there. I get that. But he even promised her the toxic waste wouldn't be a problem for him. I think he truly meant that and had good intentions, but when the mojo is gone, it's gone. So when you write your book, just explain that being a nice guy isn't about being nice, it's about being smart. lol Maynard: Why did she put me in the friend zone? I humped her. Gummy: Yeah, that's some crazy shit right there. You must have gotten a dud. Turkey sandwich with cheddar and guacamole for me. :)

[SnowedIn]

@Gummy_Cluster ... wait, guacamole? Seriously? Hmmmmm. I may have to try that. Nice euphemism using "toxic waste". Not every guy will. The double standard amazes me.

[Gummy_Cluster]

(Graphic warning) (turn back) (last chance) (not safe) He added that the only way a guy could possibly endure toxic waste, was if it wasn't his own. I was shocked, and asked him why. He said that because his mojo would still be intact, and without the mojo, that just isn't going to happen.

[SnowedIn]

@Gummy_Cluster ... omg. I'm not sure I have words. Does that make it a triple standard? Or... Or... I literally and genuinely don't understand.

[Gummy_Cluster]

That's just what he said.

[SnowedIn]

@Gummy_Cluster ... I believe you. Just. Well. Sigh.

[SexyRedd1966]

Every great lover knows a woman should cum first

[OfMiceandMen]

I prefer to give her one or more orgasm by going down on her first and then finishing off with a simultaneous orgasm. Nothing like both bodies drenched in sweat and shaking in ecstasy at the same time. Then the whole cool down period, holding her in my arms and stroking her hair and eating the chocolate cheesecake I made the night before... fueling up for the next round.

[QuietVerbena]

I agree with you but if he cums first and then finishes me off with his fingers or tongue that’s fine too

[CubaPirate]

So do you enjoy eating you out when he's cum inside you?

[QuietVerbena]

@CubaPirate sure

[CubaPirate]

Mmmm that's hot. I did it myself this morning

[slatyb]

Her, if she's able to orgasm from intercourse. I can wait as long as it takes.

[Barry88]

She should orgasm first. Once I'm done, I'm out of the mood. So I'll always focus on her orgasm (s) first!

[LiamSawyer]

She should several times because can can.

[AviatorTom]

Ideally, she orgasms first via oral, then me via oral and/or intercourse. Then, if we're still in the mood, another orgasm for her via oral, or sometimes just round two for me.

[Dargil]

I think you have it right. She should at least one time.

[UniquelyBasic]

Her first because the guy will pretty much always get his no matter what.

[Fireguy17]

I tried to make sure my partner was satisfied before I finished, if you are into toys then another one or two after I am done is not out of the question.
Sometimes it kind of depended who was tied to the bed.
Then it is out of your control, or you have control.
Nothing wrong with an hour long or more edging session, it makes for one heck of a happy ending when you finally get to finish.